son of omake
by Greylle
Summary: more story seeds, in various stages of growth, that i probably won't come back to for one reason or another. fixed some issues with chapter 4 9/4/12
1. Chapter 1: prologue

SON OF OMAKE:

By Kender Sci and myself.

These were threads at the Anime Addventure, usually involving Ranma 1/2, that were stopped for one reason or another. In some cases, it was because it had started out different and ended up going into familiar ground. In other cases, the comments and responses had died down to nothing or close to it - indicating a lack of interest from readers. In still other cases, comments turned brutal - indicating a negative interest from readers.

Presented here for your reading enjoyment, and if anyone cares enough to continue them and possibly throw them off that familiar track mentioned in the previous paragraph.

* * *

Ranma ducked and dodged, leapt over a vegetable cart, nimbly avoided a couple of guys carrying a big sheet of plate glass, and otherwise avoided being caught.

He cheerfully offered Tanaka-san a good morning as he slid under her cart of rickety wooden cages containing a number of chickens heading for market. Tanaka-san, as she usually did, winced and ducked her head.

As usual, someone in the crowd did NOT avoid the vegetable cart. Though there was no sound of shattering glass so perhaps this would be one of the better mornings.

There was his goal ahead of him, unfortunately his boss was standing outside and looking at his watch, then up at the approaching crowd.

"ENOUGH!" yelled Takahata, using a bullhorn and putting out a blast of sound that actually caused one of the pursuers (Ranma thought it was Azusa) to be blown away like some tumbleweed.

Takahata put the bullhorn down and stepped closer to Ranma. "Saotome. I got no problem with your work when you're here, unless your friends show up. But you're late AGAIN."

"It ain't my fault!" protested Ranma.

"It never is," said Takahata drily. "Even when some of your friends show up and blow up one of the walls-"

"Shampoo have to make dynamic entry! Is Chinese Amazon law!"

"-or one of them gets into the kitchen and makes coffee with ground pepper," continued Takahata.

"They look so similar!" protested one of the crowd.

"-or attacks one of the waitresses with chains," continued Takahata. "Or does that Breaking Point thing to get out of a closet he was stuck in. Do I need to go on?"

"I guess not," said Ranma.

"Not to mention that Yakuza wannabe showing up and trying to sneak into client files and personnel records," said Takahata. "Go home, Saotome. I'll mail you your paycheck."

* * *

Ranma sat back on the roof and considered the clouds moving slowly overhead.

"Life can be a real nasty girl, can't she?"

Ranma stiffened a little as he hadn't felt any presence approach until the voice spoke. Now though, it was an overwhelming presence.

Slowly he sat up and looked in the direction of the voice.

A black bird about the size of a small dog looked back at him.

"And you are?" asked Ranma.

"I go by many names," said the bird. "Raven, Crow, Coyote, Puck, Toltiir. Many others. Depends on the circumstances."

"Huh," said Ranma. "So what's your deal? Come to challenge me to a fight or something?"

"No," said Raven. "We've met before, though in alternate timelines and other guises, Ranma Saotome. In fact, you're one of my favorites in the multiverse."

"Great, I'm popular with talking birds," quipped Ranma. "Now leave me alone, will ya? I just got fired. It was a job that was actually kinda fun."

"Takahata Acquisitions could have helped you with a number of things," said Raven. "The little cafe was only the front for an export/import business that specialized in things of magic. It could have been a stepping stone to great secrets of the Art, a cure for your Jusenkyo curse, or a great destiny for yourself."

"Doesn't matter," said Ranma. "Something always comes up. It's as if-"

"The 'Status Quo Is God' effect," noted Raven. "No matter what you or anyone else does, things return to the same pattern shortly thereafter."

"Yeah, YEAH, that's it exactly!" said Ranma, interested again despite himself. That was exactly what was bothering him.

"You're in your fifth year of high school, when high school should have ended two years ago. Kuno should have graduated and moved on," said the Raven. "But little details like that have been accumulating and you hadn't been able to notice it. Until now."

"Your doing?" asked Ranma, loosening a roof tile with one foot so that he could make an instant attack.

"The time loop? No. Breaking it? Yes." The Raven considered him. "There are many ways your life could have ended up, Ranma Saotome. Having you stuck in such a rut hardly seemed fair reward for all you could do, and it would be a great shame if you didn't reach your potential."

"Oh? Are you saying my life could have turned out any different?" asked Ranma.

The Raven chuckled and waved a wing. A washtub appeared and filled with water. "It's not quite Mimir's Well, but it'll do. Watch, Ranma Saotome, and see how different things could have been."


	2. Chapter 2: Meteor

Son of Omake  
Meteor

by myself and Kender_Sci

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes. Some scenes deleted in avoiding having the story go to Adult settings.

* * *

Ranma woke up, head ringing and barely remembered fragments of some horrible nightmare leaving a bad mental taste going.

Fairly normal actually.

At which point he remembered.

The events of the past week, which would culminate in today.

The day the world ended.

* * *

It had started out very tiny. One piece of space rock, tumbling over 24 Astronomical Units out from the sun came close to another piece. The second piece's orbit was disturbed an almost impercetible degree.

The second rock therefore struck a third rock instead of passing it by as it had a few thousand revolutions previously.

The third rock moved away from its own previous orbit, just a tiny bit inward.

The third rock slowly tumbled within the gravity well of a distant yellow star, but didn't really start to pick up speed beyond Mach 18 until it passed a really big planet with a lot of moons.

Which was when people on the third planet orbitting that yellow star really began to get excited.

* * *

"RANMA! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Ranma looked up at the ceiling as if he'd find some answer there. When he didn't he looked back down at his accuser. "Okay, Ryoga. I'll bite. How am I at fault for a meteor about to hit the earth?"

"I'm still working on that," admitted Ryoga.

"Let me know when you've figured it out," said Ranma. "Suppose the old man knows any meteor-avoidance special technique?"

"Happosai is doing a tour of breweries in Sapporo with the stated intention of getting so drunk he won't notice the world ending," observed Nabiki. "I was tempted to join him."

"That would be where Pops went to," realized Ranma. "Probably Mister Tendo too."

"This is got to be your fault, Ranma. Somehow." Ryoga scratched his head. "Maybe you defiled some shrine or temple. Or maybe you insulted some girl and she was a goddess or something."

"Hmmmm," said Nabiki, looking as if she were seriously considering the idea.

Ryoga let out a deep breath. "Hey. Where's Akane?"

"The world is about to be hit by a chunk of nickel-iron 20 km x 15 km x 3km travelling at speeds well in excess of 550,000kph. What difference does it make?" Nabiki asked. "What about it, Saotome? Did you desecrate any shrines? Grope some nuns or something?"

"HEY! That's the... old lech's bag... " Ranma's voice slowly trailed off. "Happosai doomed the world?!"

"No, really, where's Akane?" asked Ryoga.

"She went with two of her friends to watch from the slopes of Mount Fujii," answered Nabiki. "Like that will save them."

"They said the big one might miss us," countered Ranma. "The US is sending all their nukes at it!"

"All their nukes that have the range to go supraorbital or that they could outfit to do so," corrected Nabiki. "That doesn't change the fact that we're all going to die in less than one day. The cloud of debris with the rock would still do the job."

"Just a wellspring of optimism, ain't ya?" asked Ranma.

Nabiki sat back against the wall. "How about it, Ryoga? Wanna go upstairs and make out like rabid weasels in the last hours?"

"Huh?" Ryoga asked, not immediately getting it. "WHAT?!"

"I expect that's what a lot of people are doing, getting a little living in before it all ends," said Nabiki matter of factly. "What's the matter, not up to the job?"

Ryoga keeled over in a dead faint.

Ranma ignored the exchange.

"Kasumi?" Nabiki asked, seeing her elder sister come rushing in.

"Ranma-kun? Can you help me with something? In my room?"

Ranma blinked. "Ya gotta be kidding me."

* * *

The gigantic rock had been watched by the people of the planet that it was about to hit for a long while now. They had been trying desperately to try and get a working plan together to divert or intercept it before it became a problem. Had they had the chance, they would have made certain that it would never threaten their blue and green world.

But due to time constraints, a lack of technological ability, and simple squabbling, they were down to their last option.

So they reprogrammed weapons that had been pointed at each other so that they were aimed up into the sky, and at the object that was threatening them all. Scientists among them had given them a point at which to aim that would hopefully do the job that they had to accomplish. With that information, hundreds of people had worked long and hard to plot out trajectories and launch times for as many missiles as they could. Everything was riding on it, and they had set it up with a system that would, if worked perfectly, save them all, when activated.

All that was left to do was to, paraphrasing a character in a sci-fi show, 'touch the button, and pray very, very fast'.

And when the time came, the button was pressed, the missiles went out, the warheads exploded against the rock, and the planet was saved from complete annihilation.

The only problem was that while the massive rock was no longer in one piece, the chunks left of it were, and happened to be able to destroy quite a bit of real estate just in landing.

* * *

"OH YES RANMA!" came Kasumi's voice as the ceiling began to shake once more.

Nabiki spared a sour look at the still unconscious Lost Boy before turning back to what was being shown on the television. While she was happy that the planet wasn't about to be turned into little pieces, the knowledge that there were parts of it about to destroy cities put a damper on any celebrations she might have wanted to have. They were still tracking the damned things, and though there was still time left, it was certain that _somebody's_ day was about to be permanently ruined.

Not to mention the after effects that would likely leave the survivors fighting just to go on.

And there she was, sitting in a place that could definately become a meteor impact crater, and she was spending it watching television.

Life just sucked sometimes.

Sighing heavily, she glanced up to where there were rhythmic noises coming from above her, and pondered what she should do. No matter what she decided, the world was about to go to Hell, so she knew that she should do something. But scamming fellow students out of their lunch money seemed hollow at the moment.

After a moment, she simply shook her head at her own dark thoughts.

That lasted five minutes before she made her own way upstairs, her own pride at stake. Hell if she was going to die without trying it at the very least.

* * *

"Huh?! Wha?!" managed Ranma as suddenly the Tendo house seemed to be swarming with guys who wore sunglasses and dark suits.

"Tranq 'em, grab 'em, stick 'em in the van. Any others?"

"Just some pig passed out in the family room."

The guy with the walkie talkie could have been Yakuza, but he was dressed too tastfully for that. He could have been some high level secret government agent if you looked over his clothing and the expensive-looking radio transceiver that was mainly concealed under his jacket.

"Probably a pet. Tranq it, tag it, and throw it into the animal trailer." The agent frowned slightly. "Hurry up people. We're on a timetable now."

"Why grab this boy?" asked another agent, apparently not realizing he was speaking aloud.

"ID as Ranma Saotome, superior martial artist. Borderline recruit though - apparently can't watch his mouth. Deciding factor at the scene is that he was having sex with three girls at the same time and apparently exhausted all three of them. AND still required three tranq darts to stop."

"Ah," said the lesser agent. "Gotcha. See why having that in the genepool would be a plus."

"Just doing our part," answered the senior agent, rationalizing the other's chattiness as being from nerves.

* * *

"Mfffff," said Ranma, clawing his way out of a deep slumber. Strange room. What was... oh yeah. First Kasumi, then Nabiki, then another gal had shown up...

So why was he in a metal room with some old Army cots and a buncha sleeping girls?

_ding_ went a panel in the wall, revealing that the panel was actually some kind of computer monitor or TV screen. It flashed a cheerful green color.

"Welcome to Habitat 4. Your government, in cooperation with allied governments, have provided these shelters for the continuance of the human species in the case of an emergency. In such an event, various individuals screened for genetic difficulties and chosen for a wide variety of accomplishments or abilities would be placed within these shelters to allow for their survival, as well as the survival of the species."

"Wha?" asked Ranma, coming fully awake. "So the meteors hit?"

"-are currently in Block C, level 24, corridor D," said the pleasant voice from the TV. "Please wait until a signal has been given before leaving your Block of the Habitat. Personnel and authorities are likely still dealing with the primary and secondary effects of the disaster."

"Waitaminute," said Ranma. "Stop. Go back."

"-security precaution, travel between levels is restricted," continued the female voice. "At the ends of each residential corridor-"

"HEY!" said Ranma. "Pause. Stop. Halt."

"-where you can fill water bottles. Bathing areas are located-"

"why couldn't pops have taught me some computer martial arts," complained Ranma.

"-station. Please refrain from smoking, fighting, utilizing psychic powers or magical attacks, or engaging in destructive martial arts battles until authorized. Message will repeat in ten minutes."

"Aw hell, what am I supposed to do in the meantime?" asked Ranma.

* * *

She watched the video that was really just block text in yellow on a blue screen and figured that this was state-of-the-art technology, circa 1982 or so.

Ranma and Kasumi were sleeping the sleep of the exhausted, apparently Kasumi had discovered that she really liked sex and until she got it out of her system, Nabiki didn't think she could count on either of them.

Okay, the message was concerning enough. The steel and concrete room was pretty spartan, and she was just watching the third go-round of the message and trying to figure out what it all meant.

"Welcome to Habitat 4. Your government, in cooperation with allied governments, have provided these shelters for the continuance of the human species in the case of an emergency. In such an event, various individuals screened for genetic difficulties and chosen for a wide variety of accomplishments or abilities would be placed within these shelters to allow for their survival, as well as the survival of the species."

Nabiki nodded at this. Made sense really. They'd known since the 50s or so that global thermonuclear war could wipe out a whole lot of Earth's life. So it made sense to have government constructed survival pods so that someone could survive, and they'd have to be kept secret or too many people would raise a fuss about not being on the list of survivors. Since the 70s (more or less) - they'd known about the massive die-offs that occurred on Earth on a regular basis. Including at least one that had been an asteroid and had wiped out the dinosaurs.

You are currently in Block C, level 24, corridor D. Please wait until a signal has been given before leaving your Block of the Habitat. Personnel and authorities are likely still dealing with the primary and secondary effects of the disaster."

Nabiki tapped her fingers against the edge of her cot. They referred to a 'disaster' - which reinforced her guess that these were prebuilt and just updated slowly as time went on. Hopefully they'd changed out the food supplies - canned stuff only lasted for so long. The message itself had parts where the voice was different - such as when it gave the location. Obvious splice job, updated as things went on.

"As a security precaution, travel between levels is restricted. At the ends of each residential corridor is a set of sinks where you can fill water bottles. Bathing areas are located across from each fill station. Please refrain from smoking, fighting, utilizing psychic powers or magical attacks, or engaging in destructive martial arts battles until authorized. Message will repeat in ten minutes."

Nabiki nodded at that. The 'please refrain' section had obviously been spliced in not that long ago.

Nabiki sighed and flopped back into the cot. The ceiling didn't have any answers, but for her to be grabbed and thrown in here indicated she'd somehow been seen as worthy of preserving. Not something she would have honestly thought likely. It also meant, unless this was some experiment by demented psych majors, that the meteors HAD hit and human civilization was going to crumble.

Which left her alone with whoever else was in this 'Habitat 4' though all she could be sure of was that her roomies were Ranma, Kasumi, and this other person.

Nabiki didn't know girl #3. That was curious enough by itself. She'd apparently shown up sometime after she'd been incapable of noticing such.

Nabiki went over and looked again. Attractive, certainly. Not Shampoo or Ukyo or a returned Akane or anyone else she would have actually expected.

No clue as to who it actually was though. "Well, whoever you are, we probably have time to get acquainted."

Nabiki finished going over the few furnishings, opened the door and looked up and down the corridor. Same unadorned concrete with what looked like airlock doors every few hundred yards.

She thought about that briefly, deciding that made sense too. If they were underground, and she was guessing they were WAY underground, a fire would be a disaster on several fronts. She went over to the nearest one and found what she'd half expected - a mechanism for closing the door remotely.

The end of the corridor had the recessed sinks, one marked for drinkable water - the other was a deeper sink and marked 'recycled' and was the first thing that didn't make sense. Both were most likely recycled after all.

There was indeed a large toilet area, and as things worked out - the girls area had yellow tape in front of it stating it was out of order. Go figure.

Nabiki figured she was there anyway, might as well do that. Besides, she'd been curious for years and she had a genuine excuse to use the men's bathrooms.

Large, multiple stalls, and a second set of rooms with actual bathing areas beyond that.

There was a brief panic moment as she realized there was a guy in one of the stalls, but she DID have an excuse and so did her best to ignore the whole thing.

Since her clothing consisted of what she'd discarded on the floor of Kasumi's bedroom, she was feeling a little under-dressed for meeting strangers.

It was when she got back that she realized that the door had locked behind her and there was only one key - and that was sitting inside.

Nabiki groaned, sitting down against the door and waiting for someone to get up. Seemed she was still a little tender in a few places.

When someone opened that door, the results were as one might expect - with the addition of Nabiki hitting her head since she'd fallen asleep in that position.

"Uhm. Hi," said Nabiki, looking up at the newcomer. "We haven't met. I'm Nabiki Tendo."

"My name is Kirijo," said the redhead, flipping back her hair and looking considerably less disheveled. "Mitsuru Kirijo."

"Kirijo?" asked Nabiki. "Oh, like the Kirijo group?"

"Something like that," said the redhead. "You coming in?"

"So, how did you know Ranma?" asked Nabiki, taking in the girl's appearance.

"I met him years ago, while he was on his training journey," said Kirijo. "I found out he was staying at the Tendo Dojo in Nerima and wanted to see if the rumors were true."

"You engaged to him?" asked Nabiki.

"No," said Mitsuru with a smirk. "Not engaged. Though that might have... benefits."

"No?" asked Nabiki. "Then why?"

"A mistake that many have made over the centuries if one studies history," said Kirijo. "'It seemed like a good idea at the time.' While it did allow me to ascertain about certain rumors, I hadn't planned on this level of personal involvement. Speaking of which, I don't suppose you've found my panties anywhere?"

"Uh, no," said Nabiki. "I was just looking around. I couldn't get any information otherwise."

"Did you use the keyboard?" asked Kirijo.

"'Keyboard'?" asked Nabiki. "WHAT keyboard?"

Mitsuru walked to the screen displaying the message and pulled on a section of the bottom border. That slid out revealing an old-style computer keyboard.

"How did you know it was there?" asked Nabiki.

"You could see the grip and the sliders if you had an idea of what to look for," said Mitsuru as she pulled a stool closer. "Let's see, now."

"Wait a minute, I don't even know where we are!" began Nabiki.

"It's simple enough," said Mitsuru, as she tapped away. "This facility began its life as an extensive fallout shelter back in the 1950s, it has been significantly extended and developed as other crises were determined to exist."

"Yeah, that's what the screen said," began Nabiki. "There's no way this could be built in Japan though. We get too many earthquakes."

"Other than that, we're in the American Southwest, in an area that is tectonically quite stable," said Mitsuru as she continued. "I'm thinking that maybe Kansas or Missouri."

"You're familiar with that part of the world?" asked Nabiki.

"I'm a college student," said Mitsuru. "My last year of high school was a bit stressful but still had a fair amount of information to be gleaned."

"Well, you certainly didn't go to Furinkan," said Nabiki. "So what does this computer tell you?"

"This is Habitat 4, which is essentially the equivelant of a buried skyscraper," said Mitsuru. "Which itself means there are at least three others - though they might not be active. Block C, level 24 - so at least twenty four 'floors' to each building. Corridor D. Since we can determine that the technology is regularly updated and replaced here, some of the items are quite old."

"Such as a keyboard apparently made in the early 80s," pointed out Nabiki.

"Or a clock made in 1952," responded Mitsuru, inclining her head towards an old wind-up alarm clock on a nightstand.

"What makes you think we're in the USA?" asked Nabiki, that point bothering her.

"The language that most of the items have on them is English," said Mitsuru. "There is also... this."

Nabiki stared at the travel pamphlet apparently left behind. "A travel brochure for some place called 'Wichita'?"

"D'ya two mind not being so... oh right," said a sleepy-sounding Ranma before prying Kasumi's arms off of him.

"Ah, so you're finally deciding to get up," Nabiki drawled, smirking slightly at the boy pulling himself to his feet. She knew that this was a rather serious time, but she couldn't keep herself from doing some things. "Finished having fun?"

"Ha ha, very funny. Ya know that I wasn't trying to force this to happen," a rather disgruntled looking Ranma muttered as he wrapped a sheet around himself.

"Ah, but you did 'rise' to the occasion."

"And ya seemed ta move in all on your own."

The conscious Tendo daughter gave a small shrug. "Can't deny that. Still, this is Ranma Saotome, Miss Kirijo."

"I noticed that," Mitsuru commented, raising a brow at the other girl.

"Oh?"

"Other than the fact that we were rather... intimately aware of each other, the fact is that he is the only boy in the room. It's only logical that he'd be Ranma."

"Too true."

"If you're so quick to agree with me, then why mention it now?"

"Simple. Wasn't sure if you recognized him without one of you laying down."

"Funny," the rich girl responded, allowing a small smile to curve her lips. "And perfectly understandable."

The pigtailed boy sat down on the floor with his sheet wrapped around his body like a cloak as he eyed the long legged redhead who managed to look elegant despite her current lack of clothing. "Okay, so what's goin' on here?"

"I've just been meeting your... companion, and talking with her, Ranma."

"My... what?"

"'Companion', Ranma," the short haired Tendo told him, as she took her own seat and drew her legs up to her chest. "And this is Mitsuru Kirijo."

"'Mitsuru'? That sounds..."

"Yes?"

"It's familiar, only... Right! It's her!"

"Oh, and that means..."

"She's a girl that I met when I was travellin' on that trainin' journey with my Pop."

"I know _that_ much, Ranma. He can be a bit thick sometimes, but at least you know where you stand with him," Nabiki commented, directing the second line towards the other conscious girl.

Mitsuru nodded with clear understanding. "He hasn't exactly changed a good deal from who he'd been."

"Can't say that I'd know that, seeing as I didn't meet him as a kid... as far as I know. But I can see where that would be true."

"Would someone mind tellin' me what's goin' on?" the martial artist asked, his eyes blinking slightly.

"Nothing much. Just making sure that we know who the others are."

"Which does bring up one question," Mitsuru pointed out, sending a questioning gaze toward the short haired girl. "You still haven't said what your connection with him is."

"Ah yes," Nabiki murmured, recognizing the legitimacy of the claim with a slow nod.

"And?"

"I'm the sister of the fiancee of the jock here."

"Her sister?"

Catching the glance that the other girl gave the snoozing Kasumi, the middle Tendo daughter laughed. "No, not her. Well, actually, she _is_ my older sister. Kasumi is her name. But the thing is that she isn't the one that was supposed to marry him."

"What happened to her then?"

"She ain't here," Ranma bit out, and sulked a bit.

"Unfortunately, that's true," Nabiki admitted. One didn't exactly rush to let others know of family... troubles, but this wasn't a normal situation. "When we heard about the meteor, Akane, my kid sister, went and ran off with her friends rather than stick it out with us."

"And so you felt free enough to..." Kirijo trailed off.

"It wasn't like we expected to survive, and she wasn't looking like she was planning on coming rushing back."

"She was his fiancee though."

"Yes, and I'm not sure how deep the relationship was. On the other hand, it was an arranged match."

"They didn't pick each other?"

"Not really. Our fathers were old training partners who decided to have their children marry, and it fell to her to do it."

"I didn't ask the tomboy ta do it though," Ranma said under his breath.

"In any case, he was staying with us because of that. And the fact that his father was a moocher."

"Some things never change, I suppose," Mitsuru sighed.

"From what I hear, no, not particularly. He's been that bad all the time?"

"Basically..."

Ranma blew out a breath. "Pop? He's always said that grabbin' food's trainin'. Heck, I remember when I met Mitsuru near that place her family owned, and he tried ta get his paws on the treats I got."

"He did have a lack of... understanding. Though it is interesting to see that the boy that I knew now has a fiancee..."

"Not only her," came Nabiki's droll voice.

"Eh?"

"He has another fiancee. Childhood friend. Sells okonomiyaki for a living."

"But did he already have..." the redhead began.

"Oh, the promise with my family was already there. However, old 'uncle' Genma had never met food that he didn't like, and since he could get a food cart out of the deal, he went for it."

"That's...

"Not the end of it. There is also the Amazon 'wife', whose laws say that she has to marry him because he beat her in a fight, and the crazy younger sister of my nitwit of a classmate. And that doesn't bring up the fighters that come to bother him all the time, as well as the odd moron that pops up on occasion."

"Didn't ask for any of 'em," Ranma growled, the sourness of his words twisting his mouth.

"We know that. It's just that we have to recognize that you're the one who all of it follows."

"Just great."

"But in any case, they're not here, and we are," Nabiki commented, glancing back towards the other girl. "I'm the 'thinker' in the family. Make plans, and come up with ideas to make money. My sister Kasumi's on the bed, and looking rather pleased with herself. Wouldn't have thought of it before. She's usually just pretty... domestic, you know."

"Ah, one of the... caretaking type, hm?"

"Pretty much. Though she seems fond of sharing... intimacy with our big stud here."

"Didn't 'xpect that, either," the mentioned boy blurted.

"Don't worry, we didn't think that you did."

Leaning back slightly, Mitsuru raised her brows. "Should be interesting in any case."

"Isn't that so," Nabiki agreed with a grin.

* * *

Mitsuru dressed herself, apparently not caring about her audience.

As soon as Mitsuru revealed that one box apparently contained clothing, it was pounced on by two of the other people in the room.

Kasumi, on the other hand, simply turned over and went from half-drowsing to completely sleeping.

When Mitsuru was done, she pulled out a device that Ranma hadn't seen before, flipped it open and began pressing numbers.

"A cellphone?" asked Nabiki. "If we're underground, you won't be able to get anyone."

"Unless there are signal repeaters and relays, such as the Kirijo SequenTrix 9500 - built for use in tunnels and mines," answered Mitsuru.

Nabiki got the sudden feeling that maybe she'd been wrong about the name of Kirijo being just a coincidence. Maybe this girl was actually related to the family that owned the conglomerate. In which case she ought to try and be very friendly. Kirijo was fairly powerful, particularly in the Iwatodai section of Tokyo.

"Yes, this is Mitsuru. I'm awake. What's the status?" Mitsuru listened briefly to the other end of the call. "I see. Very well. Contact me when the current emergency is over. I'm in Block C, level 24, corridor D."

"Bad?" asked Nabiki.

"Very," said Mitsuru as she put the phone away.

"How bad is bad?" asked Ranma.

"BAD," answered Mitsuru. "They'll be updating the video feed shortly."

"So, uhm, what do we do in the meantime?" asked Nabiki, trying not to look at the bed.

* * *

"It's really simple," Ranma said with a small shrug. "We go explorin'."

"Is that so," Nabiki drawled, her smile just a bit teasing.

"Well... yeah. Don't see what the problem with that is."

"Other than the fact that we aren't exactly prepared for whatever's out there."

Mitsuru nodded. "And that we don't want to miss our first chance at getting some real information."

"I never meant for us to go all that far," he grumbled.

"Oh?"

"We should at least know where everything is in this place. Sorta familiarize ourselves with where we'll be stayin'."

"That is true enough," the redhead agreed, pursing her lips as she looked thoughtfully at him.

"There is somethin' else too. We need to see what other supplies we got."

The middle Tendo daughter chuckled just a bit. "Imagine that. The jock is actually using his head. You have an idea of what we should look for first too?"

"Ummm..." Ranma murmured, trying to _not_ take special note of how Nabiki's breasts spilled out from where her knees pressed against them, or how smooth Mitsuru's backside looked. "Clothes. Definitely clothes."

* * *

Being a piglet was not exactly a fun thing for P-chan, and never had been. If he didn't have the difficulties that came from being an animal trying to communicate and participate in the human world, he had to deal with all sorts of dangers that could only come his way with a curse. It was bad enough being only able to squeal and walk on all four limbs, but when he had to deal with kleptomaniac skaters wanting him as a pet, and people trying to cook him, his days tended to be a bit... troublesome.

Right then, he was trying to deal with being in a literal pig sty. This wasn't just some metaphor for a dirty room, but was an actual space set up for animals of the porcine variety. As a result, he'd been stuck in pen with a bunch of of other squealing animals, and wasn't exactly enjoying that fact. Just in waking up, he'd had to deal with a collar on his neck, a tag pinned to his ear, and the sensation on his rear that felt an awful lot like the ache after getting a shot.

Things weren't exactly looking like they'd get better. A chute had opened up to fill a trough that the other pigs had gone to go chow down at, but one look at its contents had shriveled any hunger pains he'd had. Of course, there had been a 'mama' pig who'd apparently taken a shine to him, and wanted to help him feed... to the point where she was all but trying to shove a teat into his mouth. A girl piglet kept on shyly looking at him, and another one was rather annoyed with him.

But what was really bothering him was the one that was looking at him right then. This normally wouldn't be a problem, since he could handle a lot of issues on his own. However, this one wasn't looking for a fight. Instead, it seemed that this particular piglet _really_ liked him.

The problem with this was that the porcine admirer was of the male variety.

And apparently it had something scrambled in its little head, since it had decided that he was of the _female_ persuasion.

As such, P-chan was trying to run as fast as his small legs could carry him, with an overly amorous 'suitor' in hot pursuit all around the pen.

* * *

The chunk of nickel-iron had been a roughly shard-shaped thing. It had also been 20 kilometers long, 15 kilometers wide, and 3 kilometers high. It had been travelling in excess of 550,000 kilometers per hour.

Missiles went out and detonated against a perceived flaw. Some missiles, as they had never been designed for this sort of thing, missed. Enough hit and a big cannonball was more like a shotgun blast when it hit.

"Welcome to Habitat 4, you are in-" here the voice changed slightly to something more in keeping with automated phone messages "Block C, level 24, corridor D. Please make a note of it."

Mitsuru held up a hand, forestalling the exploration of the corridor. "Hang on. This is different."

The others present all stopped what they were doing, including Nabiki lamenting that her buttons had popped off somewhere, and focussed on the countdown showing on the screen.

When ten had counted down to zero, a worldmap was shown. Red dots began appearing. Lots of red dots.

The voice that spoke was a different one, female but sounding somewhat older. "Your attention please. It's difficult to gather, much less verify data, with the current state of things outside. We show twelve major impacts, mainly confined to the Eurasian continent."

"Japan was missed?" asked Ranma, noticing no red marks on the island itself.

"That one looks like it hit just about at Toyama or Fukui," said Nabiki quietly. "The tsunami."

Mitsuru nodded. "The other locations are China, India, Russia, Pakistan, just off the coast of Vietnam, another in deeper water near Myanmar, Nepal, Italy, and Somalia. Mostly in China. Makes sense- biggest area in the affected zone."

Apparently the people putting this out realized that there would be a discussion following this, because they stopped talking for a few moments.

"So we can go back now, right?" asked Ranma.

"Secondary effects," said Mitsuru. "Not only tidal waves but the fimbulwinter effect, fires started. That sort of thing."

"It is not safe to return to your homes," said the voice on the monitor. "Keep in mind that if you do manage to leave the habitat - you will not be allowed to return. There are also trailing asteroids, believed to have been other parts of the original asteroid. These will arrive over the next week.

"We are tapping into the operating news networks to keep you informed of the conditions outside the habitat."

The image of the worldmap shifted to what was apparently a grainy CNN video of a city on fire. Text appeared to identify it as Los Angeles.

"-widespread rioting and looting in major urban centers across the United States, with the National Guard called in to try and impose order. Wait one moment, we're getting in footage from our bureau in Tokyo."

The image shifted and brought a muttered curse from Nabiki. Everything looked absolutely normal about the city, except for something at the horizon.

"Live pictures from a satellite feed from the Tokyo Tower. Everything appears to be okay there," said the CNN commentator.

"What an idiot," said Ranma, understanding enough English that he caught that.

"What's that, some sort of video glitch?" asked the commentator. "I don't see-"

The "glitch" swelled rapidly in size until even people who had never been near an ocean could figure out what it was. A wall of water over a thousand feet high was briefly visible, and an eyeblink later the signal was lost.

"Oh," said the CNN commentator. "Did we lose the feed?"

"Well, DUH!" said Nabiki to the television screen. She was a little upset and reacting in a purely emotional manner.

Even Ranma had a hard time coming up with something to say, so he merely leaned back and blew out a breath. "Guess we should get going then."

"What are you talking about?" Nabiki asked, twisting around to look at him.

"What d'ya think? It ain't like just sittin' here is gonna change anythin'."

"Don't tell me. You want to go save people."

"Would that be so bad?" he asked, and then moved away from the screen, brushing a hand through his hair. "Still, we gotta go and look 'round this place."

"Huh?"

"What? We kinda need ta know what kinda place we're in, and it's not like this'll never show again. We can catch up on this stuff later, and look 'round this place while everyone else is staring at the 'show'."

"Damn..."

Mitsuru looked between the pair and let her brows draw together in confusion. She was missing something there, considering the fact that it seemed that they were discussing something rational enough, but she was also aware of the fact that they had much more familiarity with each other than she did with either of them. So, she understood that figuring it out on her own wouldn't work.

"Would someone mind explaining what exactly is going on?" the redhead asked, frowning at the other teens.

"Sorry. I guess that you wouldn't know, but this jock here tends to rush in without thinking," Nabiki admitted with a small shrug. "It's just that I'd have expected the lug to already be bashing on the door to go and save people."

The pigtailed teen glared at the middle Tendo daughter. "I ain't 'xactly _that_ stupid."

"No, but you're more proactive than most when it comes to this sort of thing. It's cute, really."

A mixture of pinching from confusion and blushing from embarrassment crossed his features.

"In any case, knowing what we have to work with is best. To tell the truth, I'd kind of like to know where the 'basics' are, if nothing else."

"The basics?" Mitsuru murmured.

"You know, bathing facilities, eating area, laundry... medicine?"

"There is that. I do suppose that we'll have much to look over."

"Can we see 'bout clothes first?" Ranma almost whined.

"Certainly, but why would that be so important?"

"I just think that's important..."

Both girls looked at each other and frowned just a bit before noticing their current state of being. That observation caused their lips to curve upwards and they sent knowing looks towards the sole male. But neither one seemed to be totally put out by this for the moment.

"I'm sure that we can find some way to... accommodate you," Nabiki drawled, her tone amused.

* * *

The bathrooms were easily found, after all - Nabiki had already located them once before. There WAS one bright bit though. Apparently the yellow 'Do Not Use' tape had been taken down from the girls' area.

"Hey you! We want some answers!" demanded Ranma from the little old man wheeling a cart along the corridor.

"It's working just fine now, young fella," said the old man. "Some idjit flushed a tampon and backed things up. Nobody frickin' reads the damn signs!"

"That ain't it," said Ranma, moving to stand in front of the old guy.

"Do ya freakin' mind? I got lots to do, y'know!" said the old man, looking up at Ranma with a distinctly annoyed air.

"When ya gonna let us go?" asked Ranma.

"Is he for real?" asked the old man, turning around and regarding two of the three women (Kasumi having gone into the facility) who had accompanied the young man.

"I gotta get Akane!" demanded Ranma.

"What?" asked the old man. "Is that your pet or magical mascot or something?"

"What?" asked Ranma.

"'magical mascot'?" asked Nabiki.

The old man nodded, sighing and apparently figuring he was going to be put behind schedule no matter what. "This is Block C, level 24, Corridor D. People with odd talents of one kind or another are in the D corridors. So Magical Girls, Magical Boys, Wizards, Ridiculously Powerful Martial Artists, Espers, and so on and so forth."

"Never mind that," demanded Ranma, grabbing the old man's shirt and pulling him closer. "I gotta find Akane!"

"Let him go," said Mitsuru, moving forward. "Now, Saotome!"

"I don't recall electing you boss," said Ranma, not even looking at her.

"Ranma," said the returning Kasumi, revealing that she'd heard a good part of it. "Akane was at Mount Fuji with her friends. The tsunami might not have crested over it, but..."

"Mount Fuji?" asked the old man. "It's active again."

"What?" asked Ranma, dropping the old man.

"A lot of volcanoes went active with all the earthquakes going," said the old man, glaring at Ranma and directing his comment towards the girl standing in the doorway of the ladies' room.

"You speak Japanese very well," said Mitsuru.

"Hey," said the old man, "I am Japanese. Sansei at least... Kirijo-san?"

"That is I," said Mitsuru.

"Oh, sorry about that, I'm an employee," said the old man with a belated bow. "Anyway, I got to continue getting things ready, if I may?"

"One moment," said Mitsuru. "This is the hub area right?"

"Right," said the old man. "Corridors are like the spokes of a wheel, with the main facilities in the close ends of the spokes near the hub. The hub itself contains all the major maintenance. We'll be keeping things bottled up as much as possible until things have settled down, and I've got everything working."

"Waitaminute," said Ranma.

"Ranma. Let the nice man get back to the business of keeping the machines working that are keeping us all alive," said Nabiki, getting between Ranma and the maintenance person.

It wasn't a moment that Ranma was terribly fond of, as he didn't want to be merely getting accustomed to some bunker that he'd been stuck it. Back when he'd thought that he was going to die, it had been fine to ignore what was going to happen to everyone else, but now he knew that there had been a chance to get through this. True enough, things were going to be at least problematic, given that he'd gone and boinked both elder Tendo sisters, but they didn't seem to be that troubled by it. In fact, he was getting a rather... happy reaction from it, especially where Kasumi was concerned.

However, there were plenty of people that he knew that were not in there with him. Just in considering those that had lived immediately around him, plenty of people were missing, and he needed to know that they were okay. To think that Shampoo, Ukyo, his mother, and the others were... gone was impossible for him right then, as he hadn't seen the bodies.

And there was one person that he knew that he was expected to save, even in his own estimation.

"Great, this is fun and all, but can't we check this place out a bit faster," the pigtailed boy grumbled.

Mitsuru raised a brow at him. "Excuse me?"

"Don'tcha think that we're just passin' the time here? I mean, it ain't like we're findin' anythin' just chattin' like this."

"And there is some sort of immediate need to go racing off?"

"Well... duh!" he grunted. "Sooner or later, we'll haveta find the way outta here, unless ya wanna live in this base for the rest of your life. But I don't."

"I doubt that _anyone_ wants to stay here. But why should we rush into what is certainly going to be a mess, with dangers we don't know about?"

"Akane is out there! She was supposedta go ta Mount Fuji with her friends!"

"This isn't meant to be cruel, but she might not be... might not have survived. You did hear that the volcanos are active again," the redhead reminded him.

"And she might have gotten through it. We can't know until we go out and look! She might be in danger, and if we're just sittin' on our hands, how can we know where ta go ta help her?!"

"She might not even _need_ our help, and it might be worse to do something and cause her more trouble when we don't know what the real problem she has is."

"But we can't know what ta do until we try!" the pigtailed boy insisted.

"Still..."

Nabiki put a hand on the other girl's shoulder and shook her head. "Hold back, and leave this to me."

"You want to talk to him?"

"Something like that."

"If you wish..."

"Maybe you can see, Nabiki. Don't you realize what's going on? We're wasting time that we can actually..." Ranma babbled on... until Nabiki smacked him across the face as hard as she could manage. Pressing a hand against his stinging cheek, he stared at the girl that he thought he knew. "Nabiki..."

"Put a cork in it, Saotome. And stop panicking, would you?" the middle Tendo daughter grumbled as she massaged her aching hand.

"You can't abandon her..."

"What? Like how she abandoned us?!"

"She..."

"She left us behind to go traipsing off with her little friends, leaving her family and fiance alone in our house! Stop feeling sorry for an idiot who picked where she'd end up!" Nabiki snapped, her gaze growing hard and cold.

"It's just... I'm supposedta protect her."

Blowing out a breath that actually managed to muss her bangs, the brunette sighed. "And I understand it. But she was the one who went to Fuji on her own. On top of that, that damned place is a mountain! How are you supposed to help her when you don't know where exactly she is?"

"I could find her..."

"Sure. But could you fix her up afterwards?"

The pigtailed boy blinked at the short haired girl. "Huh?"

"You just going to run out there without supplies? Might be fun to starve before you found her. Or you could always leave the medicine behind, in case she's sick. Maybe she's got a broken leg, or burns from lava. Could even be that she's choking on gases."

"I guess..."

"But do know what? All of that means that you'd have to get to her _right_ now, and there is no way that you'd reach her in time. Beyond getting out of here, you'd have to travel all the way there, and that ain't happening, buddy. Not that easily, and time would be of the essence. If my little sister needs that sort of help, she needs it right now, and you can't reach her in time to give it to her."

Slumping down against a wall, Ranma slid to sit on the floor. "I just gotta do _somethin'_! She's always counted on me, and now... I'm just useless! What can I do? Sit here like a lump? Everyone's always waited for me ta lead the charge, and I'm the only one left."

"Ranma..."

"Don'tcha see. My mom, our dads... The guys at school... They ain't here! Ucchan, and Shampoo... Hell, even Kodachi and her crazy brother are out there, sufferin' through this mess, and I'm just lazin' away!"

"Stop beating yourself over it. Don't you realize that you've got an important role now?" Nabiki reminded him.

"As what? A punchline?"

"No, the future. Remember, we're safe for the moment, and we have both supplies, and a place to work from. Once we know what we can do, we can go out to fix things. If they have survived so far, they can get through it long enough for us to help them."

"Great. I'm good for later. What 'bout now? What do I got for now?"

"You have me. I'll be here for you," Nabiki murmured to him, kneeling down and awkwardly putting her arms around him in a loose hug.

Mitsuru watched as he pressed his face into Nabiki's shoulder and held her close to him.

* * *

Ranma sat on the bed, hugging his knees, watching as reports came in.

On one level he was ready to charge off and go save Akane.

On another he was looking at a satellite picture of Japan and the wave receeding. In fact, he was looking at the wake left from Mount Fuji as little pyroclastic bits rained down into the water. The smoke plume might cover where Akane was huddling with her two friends. On the other hand, it didn't look freaking likely.

"So they built these things just in case the human race was bound to destruction, and that way someone would survive?" said Nabiki, thumbing through a brochure that had been printed in the early 70s. "Interesting."

"Uh," said Ranma as the picture changed to a view of Russia. Most of which looked like it was on fire.

"Methane level rising," said a voice from the television. "Volcanic activity has released pockets of methane in Siberian permafrost and suboceanic strata. Nearby flood basalt formation increasing greenhouse gas levels."

Airplanes had been in the air, and some were coming down for a variety of causes. Crashes started fires but with the disruption of society from the rest of the problems, those fires were not being put out. While in Russia there was a large area burning, Europe looked like a thousand smaller fires were burning.

"Predictions are likely to need to revision as modeling information is confirmed, but world temperatures are likely to reach runaway greenhouse levels within year," said the same voice over the television. "Unless cloud cover provides sufficient cooling that an ice age is triggered instead."

"What's that mean?" asked Ranma.

"It means that they're not sure if the world will get too hot or too cold for people to survive," said Nabiki. "That's why they built these shelters apparently. Sort of like that story about an 'ark' that was to contain species while the world flooded."

Kasumi was quiet in the background, reading as the images being shown on the television were just too overwhelming for her.

"This just in," said the woman's voice on the television. "Rioters in London have apparently overwhelmed police forces and are looting stores, with especial attention given to food supplies and high end electronics."

"That's brilliant," said Nabiki sarcastically. "Civilization is collapsing and some people are going to grab a wide-screen TV."

"Why would they go after food?" asked Ranma.

"Because whether it's an ice age or greenhouse," said Nabiki, "the one common thing is that food is going to get very scarce very quickly. The scenarios the people who built these shelters came up with is that as food supplies dwindle, people will start killing other people for food and things will go downhill even faster."

"Better to be killed for food than as food," said Kasumi, "though that is apparently possible too."

"The people who put this all together apparently did consider all that," said Nabiki. "As long as the defenses hold up, we're covered for a few hundred years."

* * *

Survival didn't sound so pretty when one didn't have a steady civilization waiting for their return. That was something that Ranma was really starting to recognize, but he couldn't really do anything about it. Here he was, being kept in a well stocked and protected box, and most of the people that he knew were out there, likely suffering through all sorts of nastiness. Unfortunately, he had little ability to even find out where they were, never mind get out to rescue them.

And that just sort of ate away at him, especially since he wasn't even able to do his usual routine of saving Akane.

* * *

Her lungs burned with every ragged breath that she took, but the air was just too good right now to avoid. After fighting her way up to the surface of that onrush of water, she needed to breathe, and that meant suffering through the pain. Fortunately though, she could stay above the water line, as she had something keeping her there.

Not that Akane Tendo was feeling all that good about that at the moment. Near as she could tell, she had at least two broken ribs, and maybe three, from when she been hit by the debris that the tsunami had brought in. Both legs were worn out, and she was pretty sure that she'd lacerated one of them. There was a screaming pain in her left shoulder, making her wonder if she'd dislocated it, and she had to have about a thousand splinters in her hands.

But as she clung to what had once been the wall to an old tree, Akane had to admit that she was lucky. She hadn't been killed in that initial chaos, and right now, she was okay for the moment. She was still alive, and not about to sink back down into those nasty depths that drowned everything around her. This hurt a lot, but she was fortunate enough to know that she could have been through worse.

Pulling herself on top of the wood was a strain on her legs, and she was basically flopping her limbs onto the trunk. Her lower limbs were fairly unresponsive, so it took several tries to even get one up above the water.

With every pant of her breath, she had to curse what had happened to her. This was horrible, and she wished that there was some way to get out of it, but she couldn't see anything that could help her right then. On top of that, she didn't know if anyone would be coming to find her, as she'd just gone and run off, leaving the others behind. She had no way to know if they were living or dead, and even if they had a chance to help her, she didn't know if they would be able to find her after all this. No matter how much she wanted to have them come, she rather doubted that they would any time soon.

"Damn that stupid jerk," she muttered under her breath, wishing that there was a pigtail to glare at.

Twisting around to look at the sky, she heaved a large breath and wondered why he hadn't come after her. He'd always done it before, though most of the time, it had been done at their fathers... 'behest'. But he hadn't shown up, and now she was all alone on some stupid hunk of wood with nothing but water surrounding her. When she might actually need his help, he was nowhere to be seen.

"Typical," she bit out... without much in the way of heat.

* * *

"That one there. The little black one."

P-chan heard that and squealed in terror, trying to hide behind the larger pigs in the pen area.

"You'd think he understood you," said a male voice.

"He DID understand me," insisted some girl's voice.

"(Someone knows?)" P-chan squealed and slowly extended his head around the back end of the pig he was hiding behind.

"Well?" asked some young girl. "Are you coming or not? If you really want to remain with the breeding stock, that's your own look out."

"(B-b-breeding?!)" squealed P-chan.

"Yes, BREEDING," said the girl.

"Actually they'll be culled down to a few with genetic samples taken," said the guy. "That way the females can be-"

"Yes, yes, all very efficient and technical," said the young girl. "Now are you coming or not? Mind you, you probably eat less and process less air in your pig form so I expect you'll spend a lot of time in that form."

"(How can you understand me?)" squealed P-chan, moving out a little bit as apparently his role in this survival colony was NOT listed as menu item.

"Well, duh," said the little girl, rolling her eyes. "This section of the habitat is for insanely powerful martial artists, supernatural beings compatible with humanity, and psychics. Any and all of which might have mascots, exotic pets, or guardian beasts of some sort. Naturally they'd find someone who could understand the tongues of beasts when looking for someone who turns into a pig. Now do you want to be reunited with Akari Unryuu or not?"

"(AKARI?!)" squealed P-chan, running up to the little girl. "(She's here?)"

"She's a professional pig-breeder, who breeds sumo pigs, who is sufficiently tough that she can teach pigs four times her size that martial art," said the little girl, rolling her eyes again. "I repeat myself. 'well duh!'"

* * *

As far as the rest of the world was concerned, the Habitats were a myth or urban legend. There might be a few suspicions, but that was it.

However, there were other locations that had the ability to survive if they didn't take a direct hit. Aircraft carriers and submarines for example. Prisons and military bases which had emergency supplies. They could survive in the short term. It was after the immediate disaster with the disruption of supplies that would cause things to become more dicey.

Which was quickly becoming a source of information for those in the Habitats as even the news agencies involved started going off the air as the extent of the disaster was beginning to sink in.

* * *

"They took the disaster footage off the air and they're now running some kind of map with details about signing up for work assignments and such," noted Nabiki.

"I must go," said Mitsuru. "I'll check back in with you when I have the chance."

"Why work assignments?" asked Nabiki.

"Keep people busy so they're not spending so much time worrying," said Ranma before Mitsuru could. She merely raised an eyebrow, nodded, and left.

"Megastorms?" asked Kasumi, seeing a news factoid come up on the display.

"Okay, that partly explains why so many of the news broadcasts when they DO come in are grainy and flicking in and out," said Nabiki. "The atmosphere getting churned up like that. Pretty massive storms. Okay, I can see that."

* * *

"Mitsuru here," said Mitsuru Kirijo as she found an access panel and slid it open. "Code 342817 Kirijo."

"Voiceprint and code accepted," said someone at the other end of the line. "Welcome Kirijo-san."

"Overall status," asked Kirijo as she stepped through an opening doorway to stand inside an apparent closet that had security cameras looking her over.

The 'closet' began moving down as it was determined that she was not being coerced and other invisible probing occurred.

"Overall status good. Habitat Four is sealed and functional. Due to security protocols, contact with other Habitats is shut down until after initial 48 hour period is over," responded the voice at the other end of the connection.

"What of the others on my 'A List'?" asked Mitsuru.

"**Yukari Takeba** is currently working in the video department where she is coallating data from the various feeds. **Junpei Iori** is currently in Block C, Level 22, with his wife **Chidori**. **Akihiko Sanada** is currently working in the Security Department - monitor room 3. **Aegis** is currently in Security, patrol detail. Location - inner perimeter. **Ken Amada** and **Koromaru** - also on patrol detail in the upper corridors."

"What about Yamagishi?" asked Mitsuru.

"**Fuuka Yamagishi** - current status unknown. She might be in the last group to arrive, as all the details on them haven't been entered into the computer," said the operator. "Sorry. She apparently was not at the location we were expecting her to be at."

"Fuuka," whispered Mitsuru sadly before going back to her business persona. "We did the best we could. Actually, it's a bit of luck we were able to get that many."

* * *

Perhaps the girl shuffling down the hallway might have looked to be a bit better had she not been battered and bruised. As she moved, she favored one slender leg, moving it almost gingerly as she tried to use the wall for balance. There was no hiding the pain on her delicate face, especially as the look in her eyes spoke of an inability to be that hard of a person. Rather, she showed that her aches were more than just the physical ones that could be easily seen.

Fuuka Yamagishi knew just how bad the sight of her was at the moment, from the mussed locks of her short blue hair, to the scuffed shoes on her feet. At any other time, she might have been terribly embarrassed to be spotted by anyone else, but with what was going on up above the surface, there were worse concerns about this whole event. So, being in such an exceedingly disheveled state didn't seem to be so bad, as recent events had been so bad that it didn't seem to be fair to be getting out of this in anywhere near a good state.

A single tear spilled down one of her thin cheeks even as she acknowledged that she should have reported in to the main staff to let them know that she had made it here to Habitat 4. But she couldn't bring herself to do it, seeing as she was there when so many others hadn't managed to. After she had really started to make friends and managed to enjoy a life amongst others of her age, she had lost friends to the horrors of the meteor's impact. Just the idea of someone like Natsuki being left out there all alone when a special effort had been made to rescue Fuuka made the short haired girl ache with a pain that had little to do with physical injury, no matter how it hurt. With everything that had happened, and after the boy who had done so much to help her break her out of her shell had tried to protect humanity from another form of destruction, this had to happen.

That left her creeping around the lower levels of the Habitat, reluctant to let anyone know that she was there. She was thankful to Mitsuru for all that she had done for her, and for the fact that she did have friends who had been saved as well. However, the team that had been sent to recover her had been one of the last ones to make the return trip, and as they had taken her from the coming danger, she had seen what she was leaving behind. Shame filled her for her inability to insist that others... that _innocents_ were being left out there when someone like her was being whisked off to relative safety. And what made it even worse was the fact that being here like this was like a physical manifestation of the shy world that she had inhabited before Mitsuru and the others had become her friends.

A sob escaped her throat as she knew that there wouldn't be a chance that she'd be seeing a boy in headphones coming over to help her, so it would be left to her to do what she could to help those with her.

* * *

For Ranma, being confined like this wasn't the sort of thing that he could stomach, but it wasn't like he was getting out any time soon. He was an action guy, and with people in danger in one of the worst events in all history, he wanted nothing more than to go out and do something for them. But he was stuck in here, and was forced to see the impotency that he would have had even if he had been able to directly influence what went on outside. With that being clear, even he couldn't ignore the fact that he couldn't go out without likely failing spectacularly.

All he could do was huddle over a water tap and fill up the bottles that he'd brought with him.

"Damn it," he snarled to himself. "This is damned stupid!"

"Emotional, aren't you," drawled a feminine voice to his side.

Turning to look, he saw a short haired brunette who wore a green jacket over a short skirted school uniform, who stood with one hand on her hip and the other holding her own set of bottles as she looked at him.

"You... you're Ranma Saotome!" said the short haired girl.

"Uh, yeah, you're not engaged to me are you?" asked Ranma.

"Huh? No," said the girl, going from excited to puzzled. "Why?"

Ranma sighed. "Vengeance quest against me?"

"No," said the girl. "I don't think you know me."

"But you know ME," pointed out Ranma.

"I'm Chie," said the girl, jerking a thumb at herself. "Chie Satonaka. I'm with the Inaba Police Department. Pleased to meetcha!"

"You're a cop?" asked Ranma, thinking her a bit young.

"Well, part time, file clerk," said Chie. "But I'm studying to be an officer! And I've studied various kung fu styles! That's how I know about you!"

"You know about me because you're a martial arts fan?" asked Ranma, blinking. At the girl's nod, he shrugged. Bound to happen sooner or later. Someone caught up with him who WASN'T a total loon.

* * *

"Any sort of disruption?" asked Mitsuru.

"No shadows or shadowrealm has been detected," came the reply. "All of the Persona users are reporting a 'feeling' though."

"Continue to monitor," ordered Mitsuru.

* * *

"Pfeh," said Kanji as he looked out over the displays. "I ain't good with this stuff. Why are we even here?"

"You didn't read the pamphlet?" asked Yosuke Hanamura.

"Hey, I said I wasn't good with this stuff," said Kanji.

"Right," said Yosuke. "We're here because somehow it got into a database somewhere about what we did last year."

"Huh?" asked Kanji. "You mean the murders in TV land? The fog? All of that?"

Yosuke opened the pamphlet, flipped to a page, then re-read it before turning the pamphlet around and pointing. "It lists here 'magic-wielders and Persona-users' specifically."

Kanji said something unflattering as he stared at the page.

"Yeah, I don't claim to understand all of that," admitted Yosuke. "Who else do you suppose they grabbed?"

* * *

There were many things that one could have been doing during such a natural disaster. Most of it would have to do with plain survival, as such a time would make it important to do so. Others would have had to do with the sort of knee jerk reactions that would come up when one was able to realize that there was an immediacy to everything.

Kei Nanjo was crossing his arms over his chest and seeming to be ready to pout.

That was at least the way that it seemed to Eriko at that moment. "Why are you so uptight about this?"

"I was raised to lead groups of people in large organizations," Nanjo sniffed, using one finger to push his glasses up higher on his nose. "In this sort of situation, I am really quite qualified to know who to pick for what task."

"Perhaps, but that's in the business world..."

"Really. And you would know of someone better?"

"Is that a trick question?" she shot back, arching one fine eyebrow at him.

"That is... I don't even think that he remembers what he did back then."

"Doesn't change the fact that he managed when we needed him."

Looking away, he pressed his lips together as hard as he could before he spoke. "It seems almost like you're letting your feelings get in the way."

"And if you'd had your way, we might not have had her here to do this work with us."

"You do realize that she was in a bad mental state during that time."

"She did get better," Eriko murmured, and glanced down the corridor at the object of her words. "Besides, she also managed to get helping people long before this mess, right?"

Nanjo didn't speak out with any agreement with her, but he also turned to look calmly down at where Maki Sonomura was standing and having a discussion with a worker nearby.

* * *

Being a 'maintenance engineer' sounded great on paper, but Riki found it to be something of a disappointment. Oh, sure it did speak well of his job, tending to the structure and making sure that it was well kept and sound. To be able to be counted on to do the work that would be needed to keep such a structure was a major source of pride. However, it didn't exactly make for much of anything to write home about. The impressive name only came up on paper, and most people would have no problem in laughing when the realized just what it was that he did.

After all, he was a janitor, and that meant that he'd be doing the basic and monotonous work that would be absolutely needed, but wouldn't even get noticed when people would be walking around him.

Sighing to himself, he began to wonder if he should even bother complaining. It didn't do much of anything to help, as such things were usually dismissed out of hand if they weren't going to cause a problem. Due to that, he was having to shuffle through some stupid utility room, dodging pipes and service equipment. Most of it was even needed, but if they wanted to maximize the survival time in this sort of situation, he was going to have to keep as much as he could in tip top shape.

Already lamenting how crappy his day was going, he ducked around some air ducts... and blinked as he saw a shape where there shouldn't have been one. Instead of the familiar view that he normally got, something sizable had taken up residence in that space. In fact, he seemed to be fairly human sized, and he had to wonder about who it was that had stumbled into the place. So, he leaned in to start a conversation with the intruder, only to go falling backwards in the face of what he'd seen.

Moving slowly, the shape shifted its weight until Riki could see what looked like a glowing eye and a small, but scary, grin.

* * *

Things were still happening outside.

Volcanoes continued to spew their contents. In the case of the Russian volcanoes, this was a slow seepage. In some cases, it was more violent. Such as Mount Fuji.

Drifting out to sea, Akane watched with big eyes as the smoke and fiery look abruptly cut off at Mount Fuji. "That's weird."

The smoke and steam from Fuji began to billow away, and when it did Akane noticed that it looked different. Not just from the angle. It looked... smaller. In fact, realized Akane, it was looking smaller as she watched.

"I've got a bad feeling about this," noted Akane to herself as absolutely no one else was even visible to her at the moment.

* * *

Tatewaki Kuno, the Blue Thunder Of Furinkan High, stood proudly at the bow of his ship as it cut through the waves. He'd heard that the fair Akane Tendo had gone with her friends to seek safety at Mount Fuji and had discovered that public transportation had become hopelessly snarled in the hours leading up to impact.

Yet what was a Kuno but resourceful? He hadn't been able to go directly to the mountain, nor (despite effort and several phone calls) had he been able to get the mountain to come to him, yet he HAD been able to go to a port and begin the laborious process of sailing the Sea Dragon IV to the area.

He'd overheard on the radio how much of the devastation he had avoided. He'd then heard a lot of silence which indicated that something untoward had happened to every radio station on the dial. .Which simply meant that the gods had chosen to favor him, as he'd always known they would.

Sadly, he'd been delayed time and time again by having to detour around major accumulations of items floating in the water. It would not do at all to have Sea Dragon IV end up as wrecked as Sea Dragon I-III.

* * *

Maki Sonomura ran one hand through her short hair and considered her workload.

Most likely she'd have her hands full through the rest of her natural life. She had trained as a psychiatrist's assistant. Her experiences had allowed her to determine from watching who was a Persona user. Now she was discovering that there were other types of psychics and mages and such, and Habitat 4 was where they had gathered.

She also knew that the other Habitats had their own 'special groups' - and understood the reasoning behind placing those names on the lists to be placed within Habitats. People with unusual abilities and talents were not only more likely to be able to survive themselves, any such talents they were able to pass on genetically would benefit the surviving genepool.

She understood all that. She even understood that she would eventually use the online courses available through the computers here to become a full psychiatrist herself. She understood that this situation was one which would and did need her services.

After all, there was over a thousand people here. Cut off from their pasts, having to survive while a world died around them, facing entirely new lives with new responsibilities.

Oh yes, she had her work cut out for her.

* * *

At some point, the walls all started to look the same, and one couldn't tell if a spot was passed yet or not. It was like those cartoons where the background was repeatedly recycled behind the characters, so that the place itself just became a vague presence. To be able to keep from becoming bored, one had to be a machine, able to keep focus on the task at hand.

Yet, even though she was a machine, Aegis really couldn't see herself being able to blindly look at the corridor in front of her. She had been created to fight for mankind against one of its greatest threats, but she wasn't just some mechanical device. Her decisions were her own, and she was able to consider what was going on around her, unlike some security camera with no mind of its own.

What made it a problem was that as much as she wanted to, she couldn't go out and protect humanity from the disaster that was currently afflicting it. Beyond the fact that she was programmed with the purpose of fighting enemies that would want to slay innocents, she _wanted_ to safeguard human lives, no matter how much harm that might bring for her. If anything, she wanted to protect the lives that were so precious to her, especially the friends that she had made in her quest to fight off the dangers that loomed in the darkness.

And there she was, moving along corridors, making sure that there were no threats that had slipped into this installation. Knowing that so much death and suffering was going on outside of those walls, but being unable to do anything galled her. But she knew that she couldn't do anything to really help them, and as much as she didn't want to admit it, she was aware of how futile it was to even try. There was just something inherently... wrong about the idea of saving people's lives, just so that they could die later.

Because of that, she was now strolling along, looking for something out of place in this bland looking station. Of course, she was more likely to see a need for a repair than an enemy of some sort. Still, that was also important work, seeing as they needed to keep this place in as good shape as possible, to keep those inside living as long as they could. So, she opened up her sensors as much as she could... only to get an alert about something that most assuredly should _not_ have been where it could be detected at that moment.

Breaking into a sprint, Aegis hurried to the location she'd come across, hoping to get there before something bad happened.

* * *

Stumbling backwards, Riki began to try wildly to figure out what he should do. This was most certainly not his field of expertise, and he wasn't looking to branch out into it. Hell, he was a damned janitor, not a soldier, and this was not in his job description. If someone wanted to find someone to fight a clog in the drainage systems, he was their man, but he was _not_ looking to fight creepy things in the dark.

Then again, it didn't seem like he was going to get a reprieve in facing... whatever the Hell it was. Nothing about it seemed natural, as no animal or plant had such a look, at least from his experience. It looked more like an oil spill that had started moving on its own, with one of those theater masks stuck to it.

Whatever it was, it didn't seem friendly as it reached out to him. He had no way of knowing its full intentions, but somehow he rather doubted that the wobble in his direction wasn't acting like some alien that wanted to 'phone home'. No, it seemed to reshape the 'limb', until it was a thin pointed cone.

Once it was done... he had only a few moments to act before the tentacle came darting towards him. Right then, it became clear that it was not only going to be a threat, but that it was attacking him at that moment. On top of that, it was not merely trying to beat him up, but was trying to actively kill him.

Fear robbed his legs of their strength, and so he collapsed to the floor... which was what probably saved his life. The tentacle sailed right over his head, piercing through a wall, rather than his head. For just a second, he thanked his lucky stars that he'd survived, but then recognized that he was still in serious danger.

Seeing as he did not want to wind up being skewered, he somewhat stumbled to a crouch, and began to crawl across the floor, towards hopeful safety.

* * *

Riki was old, a janitor/maintenance/EVS personnel, and not exactly in the sort of shape he'd been in when he was younger. He was fond of saying something about "how the mileage had piled up" and feeling as if his warranty was about up.

That didn't mean he was ready to pass on just yet.

The blob moved and sent spikes and tentacles towards him.

Despite his age (he'd admit to being over 60) and generally infirm condition, he managed to block one with his toolbag. Another slammed into one of the large steam pipes that ran through the area. The third he managed to ALMOST avoid, and that was because right now he felt as if adrenalin was flowing through his veins to the exclusion of blood at this point.

That one jab though slashed open his coveralls and managed to slice through most of his arm.

The monster slithered around to the side and raised several tentacles again as Riki tried to keep the thick metal pipes in between him and the creature.

Hearing the buzz of a motor on one of the security cameras gave him some little satisfaction. At least he wasn't going to die alone and unknown.

* * *

"That's... bad," said Happosai.

"I'd say the whole thing is pretty horrible," grumped Genma.

"No, I mean REALLY bad," said Happosai as he lowered the binoculars. He WAS an expert on surviving under less-than-ideal situations. "Mount Fuji was erupting, now it's collapsing. Get to the wheel, set course for get-us-the-hell-outta-here."

"But what about..." asked Genma, gesturing towards the island.

"Think about it for ONCE, Genma," said Happosai with a growl. "We grabbed this boat, as much booze and preciouses as we could, and set sail because I told you what would happen. The tsunami would have wiped out the old dojo. Now MOVE."

"I don't understand," whined Genma, but he moved to obey because he could tell Happosai was about lose his temper.

"What happens to a kettle if you put it on the stove and stuff up the holes?" asked Happosai as he brought the binoculars up and studied the mountain in the distance.

* * *

"-are in Habitat 3, Level 21, Corridor C. Please make a note of it."

Ukyo Kuonji sulked as the automated message went on. Of all the times and places for things to go on, she had to be carted off with Konatsu and end up HERE.

Mind you, considering what she was seeing from the jets now flying over Japan, if she'd stayed where she'd been - she would currently not be capable of sulking.

"Warning. Please stay within your designated area. The local area is currently experiencing difficulties from a firestorm. It is not safe to venture outside at present."

"So where do you suppose we are?" asked Ukyo.

Konatsu looked up from where he was going over various papers. "I think we're in Australia."

"I lost track after that flight," said Ukyo with a sigh. "Do - do you suppose Ranchan survived?"

Another shudder seemed to roll through the floor.

"They're expecting at least one more of the trailing asteroid fragments to hit three days from now," said Konatsu as he went over the papers again. "Maybe when this is actually over we can get more information."

* * *

"Chie here," said the girl into the phone. "Yeah. Security breach? It's not another damn cat, is it? SHADOW?! I'm on my way!"

Ranma blinked. "Eh?"

"Look," said Chie to Ranma as she hung up the phone. "How are you at smashing monsters?"

Ranma blinked. "Monsters?"

"Yeah, security's en route," said Chie. "You coming?"

Ranma blinked as he tried to figure out if he'd heard the girl right. "I can go with you?"

"Well, _yeah_," Chie ground out, and looked at him like he was an idiot. "Why would I ask you if you couldn't go?"

"Nobody's really asked me much of anything since I got dragged out here."

"Okay, that's probably true enough..."

"And most girls that I've met don't like me sticking my nose into their business. Usually," he admitted.

"That's understandable. No girl's going to want a boy around who's going to try to meddle with her life."

"Then what _do_ they want?"

"I don't know about the girls that you know, but I'm looking to fight some bad guys," the short haired girl chirped, and threw some mock punches.

"Sounds like you're really into it."

"And you're not?" she muttered, blowing out a breath with a sour look on her face. "Man, I heard that you were a top martial artist who loves to get into a good scrap."

"What makes you think that I'm not?"

"You're hesitating now."

"I am _not_! It's just that I've been... unsure about what's going on."

"So... are you coming?"

Gazing at her, Ranma tried to figure out what he should do. He wasn't too certain as to who he was supposed to follow, but he did like the idea of kicking the ass of someone who would be clearly a 'bad guy'. Besides, it would give him something to do, and he needed to be able to work off some of the stress that he'd be gathering up since he'd come to this place. "I'm going too."

"Great! Follow me!"

"Hey! Wait up!"

"No can do! We've already wasted enough time chatting as it is," Chie told him as they ran down the corridor.

"It can't be that bad."

"No... It's worse."

"There really are monsters out there? I mean, non goofy ones, or just transformed people?"

"Oh, they're real, and they are bad news," she revealed as her face went hard. "They'll attack anyone they can find, and will home in on anyone who they spot in their area."

"Damn it. Lemme guess. They ain't just sparring."

"There's been times when they've killed people. I know that the Shadows have.."

The pigtailed boy took that in, and tried not to ground his teeth. All that time he'd been chomping at the bit to get out, and the danger was coming to them. Had he left, he wouldn't have just dropped himself out amongst these things, but he would have left those who'd come here with him alone. Nabiki and Kasumi were the only part of his life at the Tendo Dojo that he had left, and it was clear that they were now intimately involved with him for the time being. If he went away now, they would have been on their own, possibly with no one to care about protecting them.

Not wanting to think about what kind of harm that could have sent their way, he grew intent on fighting whatever sort of bastard had just been detected.

* * *

_Elsewhere:_

Ranma stared into the washtub. "A meteor hit the world? I did THAT with Kasumi?"

"And Nabiki, and Mitsuru." The Raven nodded and cocked his head at the images playing out. "I wonder what your mother would say about this?"

"I don't want to think about that," said Ranma. "So Kuno and Akane are alive, but drifting around out in the ocean. Ukyo's in Australia, me and Nabs and Kasumi are all in a shelter in America. The world's going to hell."

"Yes, but you have a possibility of survival," pointed out the Raven.

"Got anything a little less gloomy?" asked Ranma.

A wing waved over the washtub, and the images changed.

"As a matter of fact, yes," said the Raven.

WRITER'S NOTES:

There were some complaints about "Wonderboy" (aka Ranma) and the characterizations. Also there was a lack of technical knowledge on both my part and that of Kender, regarding the whole "locked down complex" and how such a thing could work. So this one was quietly dropped and i moved on to other projects.


	3. Chapter 3: A Change Of Curse

Son of Omake  
Red Curse

by myself and Kender_Sci

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes. Happosai had been doing his little perversions, screwing up people's lives, and otherwise causing problems for quite a long time.

* * *

Ranma, while he had some significant problems and was quite capable of being a loudmouthed egocentric idiot, had just done a good deed. Not merely the blocking of Happosai's theft of Akane's underwear.

He'd been out and about, noticed a kid about to be run over, and saved them. Then he'd gone on continuing what he'd been doing, which was trying to get away from Kodachi.

The "kid" was a miko-in-training at a shrine, and a gifted one. The car was supposed to kill her, and had been arranged by darker forces.

Ranma had forgotten entirely about it by the time he'd reached the corner market that had been his original destination (prior to Kodachi spotting him.)

Getting butter and eggs for Kasumi, Ranma left.

Meanwhile the miko had asked the shrine's god to bless her savior.

Karma was about to come into play.

KARMA  
the cosmic principle according to which each person is rewarded or punished by their actions.

So Happosai rattled off the spell he intended to use to turn Ranma's girl-form into something helpless. Happosai's accumulated bad karma slipped its leash and his tongue literally tried to tie itself in knots.

Ranma's currently good karma assisted.

"Hah!" said Ranma as the energy blast missed him. Or her as the water earlier had done its job. It was obvious that the glowing scroll, glowing Happosai, glowing rings with weird symbols, and beam of energy - meant that Ranma was better off not getting hit.

"AH!" cried out a way-too-familiar voice.

"Oh heck," said Ranma.

"Uh oh," said Happosai as he realized he had just hit someone else and it looked like a helpless doll was not going to be the result. In fact, the result looked more like the gal he'd seen on TV just a little bit ago whose... oh dear had his mind wandered during the casting?

Ranma was staring as the glow faded around the target, revealing Akane was now a little bustier than he remembered - which was clearly shown by the tigerskin bikini she was wearing. And... were those horns?

Akane prepared to say something scathing, perhaps an accusation, and she thrust a hand out at Happosai.

_Kr-ZOT!_ went a bolt of lightning as it came fairly close to Happosai.

Akane blinked, brought her hand up to her face and stared at it. Then she put that hand parallel to her other hand.

_Fzzzzt_ went a brief arc of electricity between her hands.

Akane stared at that, then slowly looked back up at Happosai. Again she thrust one hand out towards the ancient lecher.

_Kr-ZAP!_

Again Happosai dodged a lightning bolt.

Akane stared at her hand again, before she did something that made Ranma want to look for shelter.

She smiled, showing cute little fangs that hadn't been there prior to this change. It was a look of pure unadulterated evil! Or at least of someone who had found a new and particularly satisfying way of venting.

"uh oh," said Happosai in a little boy's voice as he beheld the look directed towards him.

_Kr-ZAP!_

Happosai noted her aim seemed to be getting better. "oh gee. uhm, look at the time."

Akane rose into the air, looking like either an Oni Princess getting ready to unleash her wrath, or perhaps a goddess of vengeance about to do something very violent.

_KA-ZAM! VRAP! ZAT!_

Ranma briefly watched as Happosai ran as if his life depended on it, with Akane flying and throwing lightning bolts at the little lech.

Ranma knew that he should be rather concerned at the moment. After all, his fiancee had just been turned into a horned flying girl who could throw lightning bolts around like she was flicking rubber bands. At any time, she could turn around and use it against him, especially if she got it into her head that he had something to do with her transformation. As it was, she would likely use those powers on him whenever the next time that there was a problem with one of the other girls bothering him, which would just making his life that much worse.

But Ranma thought that there was something eminently satisfying in seeing the old pervert, who had been about to zap him with that spell, and who had always bothered every 'pretty' girl in the area, get attacked by the 'fruits of his labor'.

Not that Happosai was particularly fond of it himself.

"Wah!" the elderly freak whined as he leapt just above where a lighting blot charred some grass. "Have some mercy on a little old man!"

"On someone who was just celebrating his latest scheme? I don't think so-tcha!" Akane snapped, sending an especially vicious zap at the little old man's behind.

"YOW!"

"There's more where that came from, tcha!"

"I don't want it!"

The currently floating girl snorted. "Well, you're going to get it!"

"EEEP!"

"FRY!"

"ACK!"

"HA!"

"Please no!" Happosai yelped as he ran around the yard.

"Please, yes!"

"I don't want to die!"

"Hmmm," went Akane, only partially in mock thought. "There's an idea..."

"ERP!"

"Well, this is going to cost us a bit of yen," Nabiki murmured as she came to stand next to the pigtailed boy, eyeing where the property walls and ground were now pitted and covered in burn marks.

Glancing over at her, the pigtailed boy hunched over his shoulders. "Wasn't my fault."

"Didn't say that it was. But..."

"What..."

"It looks like things are calming for a moment."

"What are ya... oh," Ranma grunted, watching a twitching and sparking little old man slide to a stop in front of the two of them.

"Humph. Looks like he's not going to get away this time," commented the transformed girl as she hovered nearby.

"Just one thing, sister dear," drawled the elder Tendo sister.

"Yes?"

"I've got something here that I'm guessing will be important in your future."

"Really?"

"Yes. This," Nabiki answered, and held up a container.

"What are you going to do with a kettle, tcha?"

"Simple. This is a test. It is only a test."

"What is?"

Instead of answering, the other girl tossed the contents of the kettle straight onto her changed sister.

Akane suddenly dropped to the ground with a hard thud, and let out a low cry of pain from her bruised posterior. However, other than rubbing her backside a bit, she didn't really act if she was hurt. She just winced a bit before shuffling to her feet again. Once she was standing there, her feet braced for a fight, she went to thrust out a hand to shoot more lightning... and nothing happened. "That power to zap... It's gone..."

"So's your horns," Ranma pointed out, and then grimaced as he realized that it might turn her attention back to him.

"They... are? Wha... What's going on here?!"

"Simple, my dear little sister," the elder Tendo informed the younger girl. "I just tested a theory of mine."

"Which was?"

"Well, if the old idiot had hit you with a spell he meant to send towards the jock, I figured that he might have brought other things to you as well."

"Like what?"

"'Like' a Jusenkyo curse. Looks like he botched that spell up but good. Instead of doing whatever it was that he was planning, he gave you a curse where you become a flying horned taser girl," the brown haired girl responded, shrugging slightly.

"And you just..."

"Turned you back into your own sweet self? Basically, yes. No more powers for the moment."

Those words seemed to force Happosai to snap his head up to look at the middle Tendo daughter. "You mean... she can't do that 'zapping' thing right now?"

"Looks that way."

"And she won't be able to hurt me now?"

"I wouldn't say _that_. I mean, she can't do it any more than she used to."

"Oh, for joy!" the old pervert declared, hopping back to his feet, and completely missing the way that she tried to subtly remind him that her sister wasn't 'defenseless' now. "I wasn't worried for a moment though!"

"How interesting..."

"Isn't it? Of course, once you get to _my_ age, you learn how to keep your calm in these sorts of situations."

"I'm not sure that you could say that now," replied Nabiki, letting one side of her mouth curl up into a smirk.

"Oh, and why's that?"

"Well, on the one hand, you did mess up the yard. And second..."

"Yes?"

"This time, it was a bucket that Nabiki pulled out, and she splashed Ranma with the cold water in it.

"HEY! What are ya..." Ranma began, only to trail off in a daze as a certain fact registered in his mind. "I... I don't got... I don't have... boobs!"

"How nice," Nabiki allowed.

"I'm soaked by cold water though! I've even still... YES! I've still got it!" her sister's fiance cried out as he pulled his pants and boxers out enough so that he could look down them.

"Good for you..."

"Nevah gonna be a gurl again! Nevah, nevah, nevah! Nevah gonna be a gurl AGAIN!"

"The... His curse? It's gone?" Happosai whimpered.

"In his case?" Nabiki allowed, cocking her head to the side. "He won't be changing again any time soon."

"Bu... bu... buh... but... My darling little redheaded lovely..."

"Isn't about to show up."

"How horrible! This is such a terrible way for things to go... Akane! Let me take comfort in your bosom!"

"HEY! DIDN'T YOU GET THE IDEA WHEN I WAS TRYING TO ZAP YOU?!" yelled the named Tendo as she found a little old man trying to grope her cleaveage.

"You're not doing it now, now are you?"

"Why you little..."

"'Sweetheart'?" "Ahem," the elder of the two sisters mocked coughed lightly. "I do believe that you are forgetting something."

"What could I miss at a time like the one I'm going through now?"

"This," Nabiki answered simply, scooping up some water from the pond with her bucket, and splashing her sister with it.

"What could that do?" asked Happosai... just as the hair on the back of his neck began to rise. "Oh no..."

"Oh _YES_," Akane growled as she held her palms facing each other, letting electricity arc between them.

"Not again!"

"Yes, again!"

"Akane's got the curse now?" Ranma asked, stopping in his little dance of joy to look towards where his fiancee was starting to float again.

"Pretty much," the elder girl confirmed for him.

"Don't you worry about that," the cursed girl stated to her fiance. "I'm sure that I can handle this just fine, darling."

"I... huh?" went the teenaged boy.

Akane had already turned away, and sent a bolt of electricity shooting towards the old man.

"WAAAA!" yelped a wildly dodging Happosai.

"DIVINE RETRIBUTION!" _KRRRRRRRRRZAAAAAAAAAP!_

"Saotome?" said Nabiki.

"Huh?" said Ranma.

"Just enjoy it," said Nabiki. "I'd just watch you put your foot in your mouth and the usual problems, but I've got this really bad feeling that Akane would hit ME with one of those while chasing YOU. I'd rather not have the frizzies."

"...wah?" asked Ranma.

"Take this!" _ZOT!_

"I don't wanna!"

"Look, Saotome, every time Akane gets a powerup or Shampoo acts aloof or anything like this happens," said Nabiki, sounding annoyed, "what happens? You get your mouth involved, the property damage increases, any advantages you've gotten are lost, and Akane pounds you for it. Maybe not immediately, but not too long afterwards. I don't want to get zapped, Kasumi's budget is especially low at the moment so it's either get things repaired or eat, and do you really want your curse back that bad?"

"Uhm," said Ranma, opening and closing his mouth. He looked to Nabiki, then outside at the occasional flash as the chase went through the neighborhood, then back to Nabiki. He closed his mouth.

"Well, what do you know? He can be taught," said Nabiki, marking something down in a notebook. "Will wonders never cease?"

Ranma stood there for a few moments. It would just be temporary anyway. Right? Hmmmm.

Nabiki went out into the yard, picked up the now-abandoned scroll, and tucked it away up her sleeve without a word.

Ranma watched her go back into the house, then back out where he could see the occasional flash to indicate where Akane and Happosai were at the time.

* * *

In spite of what Nabiki might have alluded to, Ranma was perfectly able to learn about how to learn from his experiences. That was part of how he'd become such a great fighter after all, as he could adapt to any sort of fight, and then use the experience from them to enhance his chances for the next one. It was a constantly ongoing situation that he was actually quite proud of, since it showed just how good his skill was in the Art.

He'd just not been one to use that same talent towards other aspects of his life.

But he did know that there were certain things that he should look out for when dealing with magical things. He knew that a lot of times it came with a 'catch', and even if it might have been pretty much okay in its effects, things had a habit of happening that would result in it being misused in _some_ way. And given his past actions, there was _no_ way for the old fart to get it right.

"I am _so_ screwed, ain't I?" Ranma muttered to himself as he hung his head, picturing just how it could go wrong. Thanks to his fiancee's sister, he now had an image of himself making what he'd even think now was a pretty accurate observation, and her zapping him just for opening his mouth. Heck, he could already think of how she now had lightning to add to her usual bashings when she wanted to retaliate against him for whatever he'd done.

With a low groan in his throat, he resolved to keep out of this mess as best he could. He knew that something had to happen, as it always had before. Someone would get something, like that stupid bell that Shampoo had brought, and something would come up that would make things get even crazier than it usually was. That was something that he'd want to avoid, given that he had already had a bit of good fortune. Yet, he was pretty sure that he was going to be caught up in the coming mess since he'd finally managed to get his curse cured.

Not that he was going to stay there and wait for something to come to bother him. Only a little bit earlier he'd regained the ability to have his manhood full time, and he wasn't about to let that fact just be pushed aside. He was going to take full advantage of all that it could give him. Finally, he could swim, bathe in certain ways, or even get splashed, and never have to worry about feeling a wobble on his chest again. From now on, he could go topless, and no one would complain about his lack of 'feminine modesty', as if a _guy_ like him would ever need to be 'girlie' about anything at all.

Holding onto that knowledge, he turned to head into the house, ready to focus on his manhood. Of course, he needed to change his clothes, what with the water that Nabiki had tossed onto him, but he wasn't about to complain about that. It might have made his shirt stick to his chest, but it was cold water that it made it cling to a _flat_ chest, which made a world of difference for him. This was one screw up that he could enjoy, and even if the rest of this was likely to bite him in the ass, he hoped to heaven that his curse was finally away from him completely and utterly.

"Nevah gunna be a gurl again. Nevah gunna be a gurl again," he sang off key as he strode into the house, planning on enjoying a nice bath.

* * *

Happosai dodged and leapt and spun and ran as if his life depended on it.

It didn't of course, but he'd remembered hearing about some guy getting taser'ed in the groin and from then on he'd suffered from an ailment that Happosai really didn't want to experience himself. Of course, that had just been talk in a bar, but just the thought of that happening to him made him far more fearful of what Akane was doing.

What he needed was an alternate target, and since he couldn't count on Ranma at the moment - that meant going elsewhere.

Akane herself was enjoying this. Flying was cool, throwing lightning gave her a taste of what this Shishi Hokoudan and Mouko Takabisha stuff was like - and she was getting a lot better with the aim as she practiced.

"Ah the beauteous Akane Tendo, come leap into mine arms!" declared a kendoist who had taken one look at the tigerskin bikini and come to a bizarre conclusion. Which was that Akane was getting into cosplay now, and clearly this was an attempt to get him to dress the part of Shutaro Mendo. Which he certainly felt he was up to.

"Leap THIS-tcha," said Akane, hovering in midair as she brought her hands up. When she brought her hands down, fingers laced together, the lightning was the thickest she'd made it so far - channelling as it did all her frustration and feelings of discontent with Tatewaki Kuno.

Happosai had stopped and looked back to see if his ploy had worked. He could swear he saw Kuno's skeleton flashing briefly before the twitching kendoist dropped to the ground. His bokken, on the other hand, was drifting away as ash on the wind as the stub smouldered in his grip.

Happosai pictured that happening to a part of his anatomy and promptly fainted.

Akane rubbed her forehead, letting out a deep breath. "That felt good-tcha! I better go check on Darling."

* * *

"So that's what I felt disturbing things," said Cologne, shaking her head. "That old fool never learns."

"Uh huh," said Ranma, gritting his teeth. He wasn't going to say a thing. Nope. He'd say something, things would escalate, and he'd get his curse back.

"Darllllllllllllllinggggggggg gggggggggg!" said someone approaching at high speeds and glomping onto Ranma.

"Akane?!" yelped Ranma, who'd been about to yell at Shampoo when he'd realized that the call was NOT "airen" and that it was coming from up and out the door.

* * *

Being held in a what amounted to a submission hold was not something that Ranma particularly liked. He did know that a lot of boys would have loved the idea of being in his position, what with having a supple and pretty girl grinding her shapely body against his. However, he also understood that the constant pressure of the squeeze was uncomfortable, the knowledge that he'd be in such a position was embarrassing, and there was always some sort of trouble coming from it. All in all, he always looked to some force that would free him, and allow him to feel like his bones weren't about to be squeezed into one.

What he got was Cologne holding up a card saying '8.2', with Mousse's showing an '8.4' and Shampoo being the odd one out, with a card proclaiming a '4.7'.

"Okay, things are goin' strange, and they're doin' commentary..." he muttered, and squirmed a bit more.

"What are you..." Akane started, and blinked as she saw the three members of the Amazon tribe. "I didn't know that we had company, Darling. Why are all three of you here?"

Cologne gave a wry smile at the youngest Tendo as she watched the girl hook a leg around one of Ranma's. "I didn't think that it was wise to simply give whatever might have gone wrong here the time to spread."

"Hmm... Well, it doesn't look like you guys'll be needed-tcha. So, you can go back home now."

"Is that so?"

"Of course, tcha. I mean, look here. My Darling is right where he's supposed to be, in my arms!" a cheerful Akane informed the elder as she leaned up with Ranma's face forced against the crook of her neck.

Shampoo's card bent and crumpled where her fingers dug into its pale surface. "You no can say that! No take Shampoo comment about how well did glomp to mean that you have permission to bother Airen!"

"_I_ am _not_ the one bothering him. I've simply showing him my... affections? And in any case, what is with that score?"

"Humph! Is only _proper_ score. Stupid duck and Great-Grandmama only give you pity scores. You do no style, no grace, and you fly like brick! But Shampoo know how to make him feel good when holding him..."

"Why you..."

"Can't say anything back, right?" the teenaged Amazon girl purred.

"I can say a _lot_ about you..."

This just so happened to be the sort of position that Ranma wasn't all that thrilled about being in, and he hadn't even opened his mouth. Yet, he was still in trouble, as he had a pair of girls who were currently both affectionate towards him, and weren't all that fond of each other. And from past experience, he knew what it was like when girls got into arguments and he was in the middle of it.

He just hoped that Akane's powers wouldn't come into play during whatever came next.

* * *

"Just a moment," said Cologne, throwing a small cup of hot water. "Just checking something."

The change was fairly complicated. Akane's hair went from green highlights to blue, her horns vanished, her normal clothing replaced the tigerskin bikini, and she otherwise looked as she had prior to Happosai's curse.

"Huh? What? What am I... RANMA!" Akane leapt back as if the boy she'd been glomping had turned red hot. "WHAT DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?!"

"I didn't do nothing!" explained Ranma, a bit vexed at this. "Why is it MY fault?"

"Because, because, it's different with a GUY okay!" almost-yelled Akane, turning red as she realized what she'd been doing.

"That make no sense," Shampoo said, more to throw it in Akane's face than anything else.

"Why you," said Akane, grabbing up the nearest blunt trauma weapon. (In this case it was a fire pail Genma had left there for just such emergencies.)

"Children, children," called out Cologne. "You're forgetting who actually caused this problem."

"RANMA!" declared Akane, turning her wrath on Ranma.

"Why me? Why is it always me?" asked Ranma of no one in particular. "I'm TRYING not to say nothing and stay outta this as much as possible. Can't I just stay uncursed a little longer?"

Akane blinked, held out the fire pail and splashed Ranma with about half the contents.

Ranma, still male, hung his head and tried to find the Soul Of Ice.

"Ranma, what happened to your curse?" asked Akane.

"It transferred to you and was mutated into Curse Of Drowned Flying Lightning-Throwing Affectionate Girl," said Cologne. "Or something to that effect."

"I - I remember being able to fly and zapping Happosai and Kuno," said Akane. "That felt good."

"I imagine it would," said Cologne, perfectly sincere.

Shampoo considered. If she could mutate her own curse into something that didn't scare Ranma -

Mousse considered. If he could mutate his own curse into something that Shampoo thought was cool -

P-chan (under the house in a crawlspace he'd gotten lost in four hours ago) considered. If he could transfer his own curse and mutate it, he could have revenge on Ranma and be free of his curse at the same time!

"I just know nothin' good is gonna come out of this," grumbled Ranma as he wrung out his shirt.

* * *

If there was something that really stuck out in the pile of annoyances that filled Akane's mind as she walked to her room at the end of the night, it was Shampoo's influence in the whole thing. Sure, she was rather bothered by the whole idea that she was now cursed, as she had seen parts of it and never wanted to experience it for herself. And having Ranma be in such... embarrassing positions with her was not exactly the most comfortable thing for her, but she was familiar enough with those sorts of situations to get past them.

However, the idea that the Amazon, who had never been a model of decorum or restraint, would tell _her_ that she was behaving badly was... aggravating at best. As if she didn't already have enough of a problem with just having the girl act like an overly amorous freight train, she got talked down to like she was some sort of idiot. This coming from someone who had been known to enter rooms by breaking holes in walls was not quite welcome, especially since she didn't need any sort of advice on how to deal with her moron of a fiance, thank you very much.

So, it just seemed better to get to bed, and let herself show that she could do better than some twit spouting advice could be. She would simply head straight for her room, and show that she could do what she wanted to do without having to resort to taking suggestions that hadn't been asked for. It certainly wouldn't be something that Shampoo would know about, but then it was more geared towards making the youngest Tendo happy with herself.

All that would leave... Akane stumbling backwards after nearly bumping into her father, who had been carrying a large glass of water around a corner at that moment.

"Oh, sorry Akane! I didn't mean to do that..." Soun apologized as he righted his glass again.

"That's okay, tcha," Akane replied, brushing what little water she could from her chest. "It's not your fault. I should have been watching where I was going too."

"Still, it's not like a father should be spilling water onto his children."

"Even if it's an accident?"

"Well..."

"Don't worry about it. I was going to bed anyway..." she told him, as it wasn't like she could be properly focused on self righteousness right then.

"If you say so... Are you going to go now?"

"Don't see why not, tcha."

Her father let out a little sigh. "That's good then. After today, having things go along quitely, it might be nice. The Master... His actions even brought those Amazons here..."

"They're gone now, which is good-tcha."

"I think so too, but it isn't like they'd stay the night in any case. Think of how it would be to have them try to sleep over..."

"They aren't, but I'm going to enjoy sleeping here," the youngest Tendo murmured, a secretive little smile curving her lips.

"You are?"

"I certainly am," she told him and gave him a peck on the cheek. "Good night, Dad."

"Sweet dreams," Soun responded, blinking at the sight of his daughter happily humming as she floated away.

* * *

Normally, even the Tendo dojo was quiet at night. This wasn't due to any sort of agreement, rules of honor, or fear of the consequences. Rather, the fact was that most of those who would come to bother the occupants were not exactly night people, and would leave their arrivals, outside of secretive ones, for times when they could do so at a reasonable hour.

This... wasn't the case on this night.

Had it been a usual night, then it wouldn't have seen Mousse trying to slip into the house in his duck form. As he didn't have his glasses on, he took a long moment to recognize that trying to fly into a closed window wasn't the best way to accomplish that goal. Of course, that also worked in his favor, since Nabiki wouldn't have taken his presence in her bedroom all that well, and he fortunately hadn't been able to see anything when he flittered around her window.

Being an Amazon warrior, Shampoo was trained to be stealthy, focused, and fast. One couldn't get do a lot of things at an enemy stronghold by only acting as if one was a drunken elephant, and so the Amazons had refined all sorts of techniques for that task. This house wasn't exactly an enemy base, but if she was going to get the scroll that could allow her to rework, or remove her curse, then she was going to have to be careful and unobtrusive.

P-chan was... actually quite familiar around the Tendo home, given that he was there a lot of the time. He needed to be in his human form to actually get and use the scroll, so he had to get hot water to change back. Fortunately, he'd found his way to the furo on his fourth try. He had also found that Kasumi had gone to take an evening bath to get relaxed before heading to her bed for the night, which also allowed him to discover that she really was quite attractive. That led to there being an unconscious piglet under some shelves as Kasumi finished slipping her nightgown over her body, not knowing that she'd given Ryoga Hibiki a nosebleed.

* * *

It had been rather simple for Akane to dry herself off, given that she didn't have much work to do in the first place. Still, she took the time to prepare herself, as she didn't want to have a spill on her when she went to bed. Besides, a girl needed to be ready for bed in the way that she would feel comfortable in. So, once she was certain that she'd done all that she needed to before turning in, she went to do it without reservation.

Then again, it might have surprised others that her planned sleeping space was not in her own bed.

Instead, she quitely slid open the door to the room that her darling shared with his father, and slipped inside. Certain that she hadn't been noticed, she floated over to where the pigtailed boy was sleeping, and smiled to herself. He looked so relaxed there, what with his eyes closed, and his limbs devoid of tension.

She wasn't there to check up on, or admire him. There was a plan in her mind, and it was one that she was certain that the Amazon wouldn't be able to top. Shampoo might have wanted to sleep with this boy, but she wasn't a resident of the house. All that the Chinese girl could do was to sneak in to try and get her way.

But Akane already lived there, and she didn't have to worry about any silly strategies to slip into the house unnoticed. Where Shampoo wasn't able to succeed, a certain other martial artist would triumph.

Of that, Akane was certain, especially as she pulled the cover off of Ranma just a bit. She needed the space, and made certain to fill it quickly. Laying down on the futon, she curled against Ranma's side and settled her face next to his cheek. Then she draped the cover over the both of them, and snuggled into his side. This allowed them to both lay there, and she let her breath slow, as things were going how she wanted them to.

After all, she was feeling rather good that she would be both sleeping in the same futon as her 'Darling', and would be trumping the Amazon's own failure to do the same thing.

Life was rather good to her right then, and she smiled to herself and she closed her eyes in an attempt to slip off into 'dreamland.'"

* * *

"Are you sure about this, Saotome?" grumbled Soun.

"Of course, Tendo," assured Genma - who was often in error but seldom in doubt after all. "Your daughter is really affectionate towards him after being splashed, so letting nature take its course is best."

"Except its not really nature is it?" asked Soun. "It's a curse from the Master."

"Yes, and right now anytime the Master shows up your daughter whomps him with enough electricity to light the neighborhood," said Genma. "What isn't to like about this situation?"

"What are you doing anyway, Saotome?" asked Soun.

"Looking for that scroll, of course," said Genma.

"Try not to tear up the floorboards," said Soun.

* * *

Akane was wearing her pajamas, and her sleep patterns hadn't changed that much. However, every time she flailed about - her bed partner dodged in HIS sleep. When she went back to cuddling afterwards was when things changed.

Ranma came awake of a sudden, and realized he was being clutched. Seeing the arms holding onto him from behind allowed him to put together who was clutching him.

Trying carefully to unpeel those arms didn't work too well, so he was trying to figure out how to get out of this situation when he heard an evil hiss.

"Oh, great, P-chan," noted Ranma as the little piggy eyes in the dark locked onto him.

* * *

"QUACK!" yelped a duck as something grabbed him by the neck and slammed him into the floorboards.

"QUACK!" yelped the duck again as the something tied him up and put a very heavy weight on top of him.

"Quiet you," growled Happosai. "I have to fix this problem and I don't need a Chinese duck underfoot."

* * *

Genma crept up the stairs and slowly pried Nabiki's door open. He'd figured it out. Now all he had to do was -

_GRAB! toss_

-get thrown on top of a duck?

Being tossed to the side just when he was about to get what he'd been looking for was something that didn't exactly please Genma at all. He had _plans_ for that scroll, and it had been like whomever had done the throwing had seemed to be simply dismissing him. Well, he didn't like to think of anyone thinking so little of him as to not consider him a real threat, and his every intention as he pulled himself back up to a sitting position was to make sure that _he_ got the scroll before someone who had obviously intruded on his old friend's house could.

Not that Happosai particularly cared about anything that his half-witted student could, or wanted to, do. Beating on Genma Saotome had become so routine for him that he could do it just by mere habit, and he'd always been able to browbeat his pupil into a cowering wreck. So, he was more concerned with regaining what he felt was rightfully his.

Of course, he didn't see a downside to that attempt. After all, he only needed to toss aside the annoyances that would get in his way, and slip into a young woman's room. By his reckoning, that wasn't exactly a bad deal, especially considering the fact that he would be getting back a scroll that had already demonstrated powers, and that he needed to fix the mistakes that he'd made earlier. There were only so many places where such an item could be held in a room like this, and he was looking forward to some of them. Creeping into the room, he took a long look around, and wondered where would be the best place to search. As much as he wished to linger, he knew that it would be best to get in, find his property, and get out again.

With his experience backing his thoughts, he recognized that he couldn't be sure that any of the obvious spots would have the scroll. He was dealing with a smart mind there, and he knew it. Such an intellect wouldn't have made such a slipshod mistake, which had him thinking about other hiding places. In a keen moment of understanding, he acted less like a man who ran on his desires, and actually put some logic to work. Aware of who he was dealing with, he made a mental list comparing the likely tactics that would be used, like misdirection or outmanuvering, working out ways to defeat them. His thinking was the sort of strategy that a true warrior would have used to fight a battle, especially of the sort that needed to be silent and efficient.

And then he looked up at what was on the bed in front of him.

Once he did that, his mouth dropped open and he couldn't help but stop and stare. Given that there was a pretty girl laying there, he found that he had no ability to do anything else. It wasn't what he'd intended to do, but it was the only natural thing that he had available.

On the bed was Nabiki Tendo, and the truth was that she had the sort of figure that other girls would have fallen over themselves to have, and that boys would drool over. Truthfully, Happosai himself wasn't immune to the fact that she was one hot young woman, and now was no exception. That was especially due to the fact that she was currently wearing only a set of light pajamas, which weren't supposed to be sexy. But then, a lot of such attraction came from what the circumstances of the situation, and with the way that she had twisted in her sleep, she was giving off a rather pleasant image. Her legs were turned so that one could only see the way that her pants hung on her attractive lower limbs, but the way that the fabric stretched across her sizable bosom more than made up for it. And the turn at her waist allowed for her top to rise up a bit, allowing for a clear view of her flat and smooth belly, the satiny skin proving to be a tempting tease of what else was beneath that sheet and clothing.

In fact, it proved to be such a draw that he almost missed the approach of his attacker. Then again, the one coming after him wasn't exactly, nor had he ever been, a person who tended to be 'quiet' in many things. As a result, the attacker came storming right at him in an obvious ploy to catch him unaware.

Unfortunately for Genma, it didn't work, and he wound up not only missing with his blind attack on the intruder, but had gone into a stumble that had him crashing into the side of the bed. Dropping onto the floor, he blinked away the 'stars' in his eyes, and shook his head to clear it of the jumble that it'd fallen into.

At the same time, the little old pervert wasn't exactly staying still, since he had a threat to deal with. Long used to such conflicts, though normally only from angry fathers reacting to his 'invasion' of their daughters' rooms, he knew how to bounce around the confined space to good advantage. His leap away from the initial attack had landed him on desk, and he bounded out of the way as the bulky attacker tried again, this time resulting in a chunk of the piece of furniture being knocked off.

Growling in frustration, Genma knew that whomever it was that he was fighting had to be one quick bastard, but he wasn't a slouch in combat himself. Due to his well practiced ability to dodge trouble coming his way, he twirled around the counterattack, making it so that the picture on the wall took the brunt of the hit. However, he also didn't have a lot of room to move in, so he wound up dropping onto, and smashing the desk chair.

Happosai wasn't pleased with the fact that he was having to deal with a fight at the moment, and he didn't try to be fancy about attempting to end it. Instead, he merely went over and tried to kick his opponent before the guy could try to hit him again. The problem with that was that his enemy in this fight didn't play it the easy way, and grabbed him as his foot made its impact. Because of that, the both of them crashed into the wardrobe as they tried to swing punches and dodged each other's strikes.

Then came a duck wrapped in chains that made 'squawk' like sounds as he came along and bounced around the room in a combination of trying to get free and attacking at the same time. In the blind mix of feathers and bird noise, the bindings whipped away as, in a difference from normal avian behavior, the duck managed to cut the chains away, sending them flying off as he darted around at the same time.

Used to less noise, but familiar with mob scenes, the pervert gnome perched on a trunk, took note of the lace edged panties that had been knocked there, and figured that he'd been given at least a little luck with the farce.

Mousse was rather put out that he'd been tied up, and was almost prepared to get payback for it, had it not been for the fact that he still had a scroll to find.

For his part, Genma had been pleased that he'd been able to dodge the fowl... until he found that his attempt to place the newcomer in between himself and the original intruder had resulted in him falling on top of the bed. Normally, this wouldn't have been a problem, but the bed had been occupied at the moment. Since that was the case, his unconscious attempt to grab onto handholds hadn't gone quite as he'd desired. While his hands were holding onto something, it was clear that the soft weight filling his grasp wasn't coming from pillows.

As such, Nabiki wasn't exactly pleased by what was happening to her. She'd already been awakened by someone crashing into her bed. Then had come the sounds of rapid movement, and attempted attacks that had filled her room, which she'd tried to keep from hearing by wrapping her pillow around her head. Doing that didn't work though, as the combat was happening right in her room, and as her bleary eyes started to open and focus, she started to see that her room was being redecorated to look like something out of a 'post apocalyptic' movie. The worst was yet to come, as she was rather forcibly brought to full wakefulness when Genma Saotome fell onto her... and grabbed her breasts, using his meaty hands to squeeze them hard.

As it was, she'd already been grumbling, growling, and snorting to herself over the sudden increase in activity in her room. Rather than being her private space, it had been turned into something busier than a train station at rush hour, and she wasn't one who liked such a place when it was natural to expect them to be there. Getting woken up in the middle of the night by idiots who seemed to think that her room was an arena for mortal combat was more than just unexpected. To top it all off though, being put through having herself be touched by this jackass was just the worst thing that could have happened.

'That's it. They all die. As soon as possible,' she thought to herself, actually allowing herself to grind her teeth. 'And as painfully as possible.'

However, this wasn't exactly what Genma wanted for himself either, and as he tried to extricate himself, he wondered just why this hadn't gone as smoothly as he'd assumed it would.

All Happosai could do was give a little whine as he realized that he could have gotten a good grope of the cute girl at the same time that he got the scroll, and he was a little jealous that he wasn't the one enjoying the pleasure of her bosom.

Seeing Ranma's father grope one of the Tendo daughters confused the hell out of Mousse, but he pushed that aside, and pulled out a series of throwing daggers to use on his next attack.

And all the middle Tendo daughter could think to do was bite back a scream as a face with skin that was like old leather was rubbed against her belly, cranking up her desire to punish the morons who'd disrupted her sleep for _this_,

* * *

"BWEEEEE!" attacked P-chan.

Ranma tensed, ready for the attack but not really able to move out of the way in his current predicament.

So he was a little surprised when P-chan bounded past him, scrambled out the door and made it down the hallway.

"I wonder what THAT was about," mumbled Ranma.

"Mphg," grumbled oni-Akane as she clutched her body-pillow. "-tcha."

Ranma prepared himself for what promised to be a nerve-wracking sleepless night.

Then Akane mumbled something else, floated up and away from him, and stumbled off - quite obviously more than half-asleep still.

Ranma wondered why he felt less relieved and more nervous about this new development.

* * *

Nabiki was less than pleased.

Not only had a little black pig now gotten involved in the fight, but things in her room were now getting to the level of a full-scale martial arts combat. "It isn't in here."

There was no immediate indication that anyone had heard her.

"HEY!" snarled Nabiki, not liking this development at all. "I hid the scroll SOMEWHERE ELSE!"

More crashing, smashing, tinkling, and crunching noises.

A light source showed up at the open door to the bedroom. Little yellow electric arcs provided an uneven radiance, and Nabiki held up a hand to protest what she knew was about to happen.

_KZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAP_

Nodding once in satisfaction at the newly returned silence (no, Hotaru is not in this story), Akane stumbled off to bed again.

Her hair frizzy and smoking, Nabiki managed to get her head up. "The scroll is hidden somewhere outside the house. Morons. There's a note on the door making that statement."

"The dojo!" exclaimed Happosai, recovering and bouncing away.

"GROWF!" declared Genma.

"BWEEE!" challenged Ryoga.

"QUACK!" indicated Mousse.

_slide. crash. tinkle._ indicated something in the darkness.

"They will so pay for this," grumped Nabiki, trying to get back to sleep.

* * *

In the yards of most homes, the sounds of idiots charging forth into battle would be met with alarm, but at the Tendo home, that was all too often a regular thing. About the only real problem that anyone would have with it was that it would cause a lot of noise, especially since the residents were involved themselves. So as oni-Akane snuggled back up against a weirded out Ranma, Nabiki tried to settle back to sleep, and Kasumi slept through the whole mess, the struggle continued.

Happosai reached the dojo first, mainly through a bunch of manic moves that came from the fact that he was experienced, skilled, and motivated, all of which had him already knowing the fastest ways around the Tendo home. Getting there was only the first part of the problem, as he had to find the scroll, and that meant searching for it. So he tucked the bra that he'd stolen from Nabiki into his shirt and started to look around for some sign that would quickly lead him to where she'd hidden what belonged to him.

This allowed a certain Amazon to blow past him, as subtlety had never been her strong suit. As this was a race against time, Shampoo didn't have much time to wait and ponder possibilities. She had to get through, and if that meant running over little old perverts, then so be it.

Unfortunately, this allowed the lech to get a good look up her skirt, which rather energized him. It also distracted the founder of the Anything Goes school, as he knew that he had choice female flesh there. Few girls were as well curved at the Amazon beauty, and he couldn't stop himself from latching onto her bountiful bosom.

Of course, she didn't exactly want to stand for this, and proceeded to try her best to whack the little gnome off of her chest.

This also provided an opportunity for Mousse to show up to try his luck at finding the scroll. Upon seeing the distress that had 'his love' trying desperately to get free of the clinging pervert, but only managing to bash rather sizable dents into the structure around her, he also saw a chance to both rescue her, and gain favor with her. He tried to use his chains to tie up the little old thief... and only managed to send them slicing into the wall. Trying to move in didn't help, as she wasn't concerned for him, and never saw his approach.

Not that Shampoo would have been particularly bothered by the fact that she'd smacked him right into a weapons' rack. Seeing as she didn't like him, and was pretty willing to hit him in a normal situation, this wasn't something to be bothered about. Instead, she continued trying to help herself as the rack got hefted and thrown away.

Her reaction to that might have been a bit more... sizable, but then again, she would have had to have missed Genma's entrance. Given that he'd barrelled into the dojo, charging into anything, or any one, in his way, like a runaway boulder. As a result, Shampoo got free as the pervert got bounced into the floor, causing a small crater in the floor, but any enjoyment that she would have gotten was tempered by the fact that she wound up crashing through a wall.

As he'd never been all that close to her, Ryoga simply bounded, and started looking. Since he was investigating an old tapestry, this wasn't exactly a problem for many.

It did bother Mousse though, as the duck had to wiggle around him until he managed to send a number of blades at the elder Saotome.

Ducking out of the way of the attack was simple enough, but Genma hadn't exactly been able to dodge the following indignity of having Shampoo use his head as a step to let her leap across the room following her reentry into the dojo.

Needless to say that Happosai wasn't planning on being left out, and took only a moment to appreciate her shapely legs before stomping on a piglet as he ran to go and start ripping out the contents of the cabinets.

This annoyed Ryoga, who went racing after the little old freak, only to wind up accidentally jumping into the top of Shampoo's dress.

Gaping a bit at the sight of the piglet trying to escape from between sizable breasts, and the girl trying to get a hold to pull her unwanted guest out from her cleavage, the pervert thanked the gods for small favors.

His student just tried to the distraction to punt him out of the way.

That action was dealt with by a simple sidestep, and the handing over of a lit bomb, after which Genma was shoved off to the side, landing heavily just as the explosive went 'boom', and blew out a chunk of wall and ceiling.

Displeased at the activities of a certain black porcine being that had just been freed from his mammary 'prison', Mousse began to whip out chains at the piglet. With the duck's bad eyesight, and the transformed Ryoga's inability to go anywhere simply, the weapons actually did all their damage with slices and cuts all over the dojo.

Leaving the two teenaged boys to act out their immaturity, Shampoo turned her attention to trying to rip up whatever looked loose enough to allow for the hiding of a scroll. She also took just enough time to swat Genma Saotome so hard that the man wound up caving the floor in beneath him as he fell.

Since he wasn't particularly pleased with the bulky man, Happosai decided to add on yet another insult to the Saotome Patriarch, as he dropped another bomb onto the man.

The explosion actually set some bits of the structure on fire.

Had anyone actually looked, they would have seen a dojo that had seen better days. Rather than the pristine place of a school that had power and students, or a well loved family structure, it was starting to look... ragged. Wood from holes bashed through the walls were all over the grass, and chunks of wood had fallen down were blades had literally cut them out of the building. A piece of roof had been blown away, and soot covered one side. So, it looked rather like it had been left to rot for some time.

Then again, as Shampoo and Genma tried to smack each other silly in their fight to get the other out of their way, the resulting knocking out of other walls made it more like the place was in for demolition.

And as one corner support beam fell over from the cuts that a certain duck had put into it as he tried to take a swing at a certain pervert, it quickly became clear that the structure wasn't about to stay standing for long.

One got a clear view of that as one wall simply groaned and dropped, like an athlete that had pushed himself to his limits.

It was almost poetic, even if no one would was actually paying attention to it. They were too busy trying to beat each other up and pull apart the dojo to find the hiding spot. With that in mind, it was clear that no one in particular was going to take note of the fact that they were making the Tendo family dojo unusable.

* * *

Soun got up, the racket outside being sufficient to rouse him, and wandered downstairs as the carnage continued. He was still half-asleep until he got a direct line-of-sight to the dojo.

At this point he came fully awake, jaw dropping and eyes popping as he noticed a large panda launched through the roof - who rotated himself and came back down in a trajectory that widened the hole he had made going up.

With a groan that went into what sounded like a tired sigh, the dojo simply collapsed under this latest indignity.

"AHGH!" yelled Soun. "NO!"

There was a few more crashes and smashes as various others extracted themselves from the ruin.

"...my dojo..." said Soun. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!"

At which point various people involved noticed there was a note on a rooftile. "What's this?"

Clue #2  
Tears like fountains of misery  
mark the spot for the next clue  
seek the robes of his station  
where it is seated to view.

Eyes seemed to glow in the dark as several individuals locked onto Soun Tendo.

"Uh oh," said Soun, who had a bit of danger sense himself. As he turned to flee, that action provided a glimpse that something had been pinned to the inside of the gi pants he was wearing, square from the outline.

"DROP 'EM, SOUN!" thundered a little pervert as he leapt forward.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" said Soun, sure now that some weird love potion or something had been in use. After all, they'd been considering ordering just such a thing from one of those Chinese catalogs just prior to this latest mess. Naturally, under such a situation he ran like the wind.

"GROWF!" declared a panda, leaping forward. There was no way he could let the dread Master have it. At least not before he got rid of his own curse!

"CRYING MAN STOP!" yelled Shampoo, also leaping forward.

"STOP MOLESTING MY SHAMPOO!" yelled Mousse, throwing ropes out as he'd run out of chains. "I've studied this shibari technique to immobilize you! You... you're not Ranma."

"mfff (oh dear)," said Kasumi, thinking she'd picked entirely the wrong time to investigate the noise.

"COME BACK HERE!" yelled Mousse, rushing off to give chase.

"Bwee?" snortled a piglet, who was keeping a line-of-sight on a panda. Which was unfortunate for him, since if he'd glanced towards Kasumi he'd have collapsed and missed the resulting chase scene.

Soun ran as if his life depended on it. Everyone else chased. Ranma tried to get used to Akane sleeping next to him. Nabiki grumbled at the law of averages catching up with her, and tried to sleep. Kasumi mfffed in her gag and tried to wiggle free, eventually falling asleep and hoping someone would wake up and free her in time to make breakfast at least.

* * *

Unlike some of his compatriots, Soun Tendo had not exactly been living a life full of fighting and practice. Rather, he'd gone and settled down to a home and family where his greatest rush was the one to the bathroom. Other than losing his beloved wife, some might have said that he'd had it easier than others, like the Amazons, who lived in a village of warriors, or the Kunos, who lived in a world of delusion and twisted ideals.

That wasn't to say that he couldn't rise to the moment when it was called for... as it was when it so happened that a number of people that he knew were after his backside.

Even considering the way that he'd go out and chase after Ranma with a bow and arrow at times, he was moving rather quickly. After all, despite having a life where his youngest daughter fought more than him, he wasn't a slouch either. No, he was quite able to run down the street, screeching like a little girl faced with horror movie monsters. Each step that he took was as high as he could make it, and he raced down the road through the market area.

Seeing as Genma Saotome was barreling right after him, this wasn't a bad idea, considering that the giant panda was trying to grab him with its claws.

"You no get away!" Shampoo cried out as she bounded over signs and around street lamps to try to get around the big cursed idiot in her path to the tush of her rival's father.

Happosai chortled as he bounced from awning to awning, and then used Shampoo's sizable chest as a welcome springboard to go after his panicking former student.

Fortunately for P-chan, he was a bit too busy trying to not get crushed as he attempted to weave around Genma's feet to get ahead to notice the 'bust bounce'.

Not that Mousse saw it either as he was focused on reaching Soun before the others... although he probably should have put his glasses on before deciding on his path. "Shampoo! Don't worry! I'll save you when I get to you!"

"WAAAAH!" went the Tendo patriarch as he sped down the street.

* * *

Having trouble sleeping wasn't something that frightened Ranma, as he had experienced it before. It happened to a lot of people, and he'd dealt with it by practicing in the dojo, fighting off intruders, and simply trying to get some warm tea into his system. This wasn't a regular thing, but he did have enough experience with it to recognize the issues behind a lot of his reasons for insomnia. In this case, he didn't really have to analyze just why he couldn't get any real rest.

Akane didn't pay much mind to his distress though, as she was already happily asleep. She'd cuddled up to his side, with her breasts pressing against him so hard that it was clear that she was quite... comfortable with the position. Her arms had a tight hold around his torso, and one of her legs was looped around one of his. With her softly smiling face mere centimeters from his, her breath was a warm brush against his cheek.

He just had to wonder what would kill him first, the stress of having her in such intimate contact with him, the other people who would flip out when they found out that she'd slept with him, or Akane herself.

* * *

It was a simple place, and not something that would have seemed odd in any really major city. One street had several roads crossing over it, with the expected blocks in between. Sure, there were several close together, but that happened from time to time, either through planning, or just simple happenstance.

All that Soun cared about was that it allowed him to make a quick left turn, and he took it, with Happosai running along property walls, Shampoo right after him, Mousse somehow managing to reverse the 'identifications' of 'his beloved' and the Tendo father, and the two cursed individuals bringing up the rear.

Then they came back across the main street on the second cross street, and whipped across the third.

Somehow, this was followed by the group led by Soun going back onto the first street, with Mousse trying to chain up Shampoo, Happosai riding P-chan, and Genma right behind his old friend.

On the next pass, Shampoo was trying to bash Mousse as the mob raced over the third street, P-chan and Soun were right behind them, and Happosai was whapping Genma on the head to get him to go faster.

Coming back around on the second street, Soun was being chased by an irate Mousse, Genma was free to run by himself again, and P-chan passed by Happosai and Shampoo, with the latter yelling, "Mousse no touch Shampoo, and neither do you!"

Genma came back around onto the second street, blinked at being alone, and then shook his head before following that street.

A crying Soun raced along the third street, with Mousse tossing chains his way, and Happosai throwing bombs.

Getting distracted wasn't what Shampoo wanted, but she couldn't help it as she alternated between trying to yank a _majorly_ lost P-chan out from under her blouse, and trying to bash the piglet's confused brains out as she charged down the second street.

For his part, P-chan ran up the first street with no idea as to just why Mousse was after him, but he did know that Genma didn't seem to notice as he passed on the first, nor did Happosai, Shampoo and Soun did on the third.

The second street did cause for a bit of an issue, as Shampoo came from the left, Soun came from the right, and they collided, with him laying down on top of her, with one hand on her breast. As getting groped by the man with the mustache was _not_ something that she wanted, the Amazon girl made her displeasure known by yelling, shoving him off of her, and chasing the man back the way that he'd come.

She did lead the charge as the entire group merged back together, and charged up the third street, down the second, back up the third, over the first, and then along the second.

Somehow, P-chan wound up in the lead, Mousse followed, Genma charged up behind them, with Happosai and Shampoo bringing up the rear... save for Soun, who was behind them all. When the group reached the main street, the Tendo parent slowed down and blinked in confusion for a little bit. Then it slowly dawned on him that his pursuers were running _away_ from him. Due to that, he had an opportunity, and he wasn't about to miss it. Turning slightly, he began to tip toe away... until he felt heat coming from beside him.

Glancing over, Soun saw each and every one of those chasing him standing there, looking firm on their stance, and not avoiding the fact that they were telling him that they knew where he was. Of course, they weren't about to play games right then, and he knew it.

So, he yelped, and jumped up about a foot before charging down the main road, with the posse after him in full pursuit.

It showed every sign of becoming a major chase scene, even after leaving the set of roads behind in order to knock over a vegetable cart.

The proprietor of said cart screamed several things not generally said in polite company. Or even around politicians.

"STOP AND DROP THOSE PANTS, TENDO!" commanded Happosai. "YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING THAT BELONGS TO ME!"

Naturally, on hearing that declaration, Soun Tendo's reaction was one of dismay and panic with a side order of horror. Just as naturally, Soun Tendo neither stopped nor did he undo the tie on his pants. He managed to leap and run just a little bit faster than previously. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

The crowd of people on the street heard this and stared after the crowd. More than one thought that just when you thought it was bad enough that the panty-thief was running around, something worse would just have to make an appearance.

Soun ran, and as he ran he began to remember things from his days studying under the Master. Don't run in a straight path. Use available cover. Duck through a crowded restaurant in order to throw off pursuit.

In that restaurant, as the crowd passed, customers began to notice items missing in the wake of that crowd.

Mister Nomura, noticed that his wife had a brief but intense encounter with a shriveled little man who managed to grab said wife's diamond pendant after rubbing his entire body against her bosom. Mister Nomura calmly flipped a cellphone open and said a single phrase after pushing speed dial 4. "Eliminate him, return the necklace."

At which point a crowd of obvious thugs gave chase to the crowd.

At the same time, various other patrons of the restaurant discovered food missing.

Genma gulped down several savory morsels, thinking how handy it was that they'd made this detour.

Seeing as how the group was STILL on his tail (an image he really didn't want or need), Soun looked for another attempt to get away - this time deciding on a nearby University. Surely they wouldn't pursue him there!

* * *

It wasn't so much that Soun really wanted to go in that direction, but that he was merely aiming to get out of the way of others. Despite having years of relative peace under his belt, there had been plenty of experiences when he'd been running away from those his Master had annoyed. And he knew without thinking about it that a good way to get away from pursuers was to make sudden shifts in direction.

Unfortunately, that didn't work as he raced through the gates of Sophia University.

Of course, he didn't particularly know that he'd gone and wound up in a whole other part of Tokyo. Rather, he was aware that he had some crazed individuals on his tail, and didn't want them even more onto it.

Shampoo caught one boy staring at the way that her bosom bounced as followed the older man down the fortunately lowly populated 'Main Street', but didn't have the time to complain. So she merely kicked him in the head as she jumped over him, finding that to be satisfactory enough.

The library had been quiet enough... until a crying man burst in, trailing angry Chinese girls, old gnomes with creepy laughs, pandas, myopic Chinese boys, and a whole horde of thugs. Around the shelves of books they went, racing up and down the aisles, and over every set of stares in the place.

One poor set of students even had a bit of a scare, with some of them having to duck as computers were destroyed by a long haired guy in a robe throwing chains at them, and yelling, "I'll keep you from molesting my dear Shampoo, Soun Tendo!"

This caused even more of a whine from the named man, and he bolted _through_ several stacks of books on his way out of the place.

One security guard looked at the crowd of people, looked at his hands, looked at the rough people who were grinning at him, and wondered what he was supposed to do.

Soun knew that the only thing that he could do was to keep on running, as he was all too aware of the fact that things were getting to be rather... troublesome for him. Even if he could indignity of getting his pants pulled down, he knew that everyone after him seemed to be trying to be the one to do it. Considering how much of a pain that would be for him, he decided that _anywhere_ was better than there, and so just raced onward, not particularly caring about where he went.

To the chagrin of the screeching and panicked young ladies of the locker room, Happosai had cared, and been rather appreciative of the latest turn that the chase had taken. If he had thought that it had been intentional, he would have thanked his bonehead of a student for getting something 'right'. As it was, he leapt from squealing girl to yelping girl as he enjoyed their charms on his way to get those pants.

This would have caused P-chan to have a rather large nosebleed... but he was a bit busy trying to squirm his way free of the hold of the group of girls who'd found him, and declared him to be 'cute'.

Not that the other girls were about to get caught up in that, as they started chasing after the horde of apparent molesters with sports equipment, intent on doing damage to those who'd invaded their space.

Having found that running through a girl's locker room held no more appeal than it had been when he'd been running for his life all those years ago, the Tendo patriarch decided that getting away was paramount. He needed to find safety, security, and a place where he could feel calm, and at ease. Instead, he found a cafeteria.

For Genma, this was a joy, as he got to eat on the go. Sure, this wasn't the best cuisine around, but it was cheap, and it was there. Of course, it was hard to get something into his mouth with his Master around, but a plate of thrown pasta was enough to get the old pain away from him.

Then again, the young woman whose bosom it landed upon likely didn't appreciate it, especially a little old prune of a man landed on her lap and tried to eat it out of her cleavage. When this was followed by the yakuza thug trying to grab the pervert, and winding up groping her breast instead, this was seen as a scary proposition. No one could doubt that this was not something that one could take lightly.

This was especially true for the girl who wound up having to fend off the appeals of a boy in white robes who kept on trying to talk to her about hair care products.

Considering his luck, Soun had reason to sweat, but he wasn't about to play around, and so he continued on towards the church.

For reasons that he couldn't be certain of, the pastor there felt a chill run down his back.

* * *

Sophia University followed the general Japanese attitude of specialization rather than generalization. Due to that, and a water leak in the main library the previous week, another building was currently the main library for the campus.

"Can you imagine? An actual Gutenburg Bible?" said one of the students to the others, gathered around the display.

"One of the first books made using movable type, the first mass production process," said another, his tone hushed and reverent.

"Scrolls were perfectly fine," said a third student, adjusting his glasses.

There were a few grins and glances among the five theology students, indicating this was perhaps just part of another long-running argument among friends.

"What's all that noise? Don't they know this is a library?" asked the first student, turning around to look in the direction of the disturbance.

_KA-BOOM!_ went the glass doors leading into the library.

Out of the smoke ran a middle-aged man in brown gi, long-haired and moustached, who seemed a little singed around the edges.

Following him was a... panda?!

Had it just stopped there, the five students would have simply formed a defensive ring around the display - readied attacks and prepared to deal with the savage beast that intruded upon their hallowed halls.

The panda was followed by a cat, a duck, and an old wrinkled gnome who was apparently pulling firecrackers out of his gi.

The five theology students did not know that the lawn sprinklers had activated mid-chase. It was simply bizarre enough to give them pause.

At which point the duck and the gnome began fighting each other, occasionally throwing a missile towards the front of the procession.

"That's MY trick, how dare you copy it?!" demanded the gnome, tossing firecrackers with wild abandon.

"QUACK!" responded the duck, throwing sparklers and bottle rockets about with seemingly no aim whatsoever.

"BWEE!" said a small pig as a bomb three times his own mass bounced in his direction.

Small explosions were now a continuous theme with larger explosions forming punctuation as the two small combatants took their battle through the various aisles.

Meanwhile the panda was apparently shoving over bookcases in an attempt to cut off escape routes of the middleaged man.

"DROP THOSE PANTS AND GIVE ME WHAT'S IN THERE, SOUN TENDO!" called out the gnome.

"WAHHHHHHHHH NOT FOR YOU OR ANY MAN ALIVE!" yelled the running man.

Yakuza thugs entered the building, followed by outraged girls holding various blunt weapons of opportunity, followed by various other people.

"QUACK QUACK QUACK!" yelled the duck, sending a spray of throwing knives out.

"I was saving this for a special occasion," said Happosai, pulling a particularly big bomb out of his sleeve in flagrant disregard for things like apparent mass and volume.

The five did see this coming and dove for cover, survival instincts coming to the fore.

When the ringing in their ears finally abated, one of the students removed an errant throwing knife from where it had embedded in his shoulder. The five gathered around the smouldering display case and looked over the other displays that were still visible.

"Oh hell," said all five.

"We've got to go after them," said one. "Someone's gotta pay for this."

"I got pictures on my cell phone," said another. "Should we send them to the paper?"

"Hey, any break I get on my tuition," said the first, gesturing around them at the devastation.

* * *

Soun Tendo got as far as Madame Takahashi's Wax Museum and had hidden in a back room before someone finally caught up with him.

"GOT YOU!" declared Happosai, grabbing the figure and tossing him aside as the prized trousers were whipped off of him.

Soun had a brief moment of surprise before he landed on the table and the impact caused an outpouring of hot wax to gloop down over him.

"MFFFF!" declared Kasumi, tied up and gagged but safely at the Tendo House and far away from the events transpiring at Madame Takahashi's.

"AGGHH!" yelped Soun before sound was cut off. With Happosai having struck a paralysis shiatsu, Soun just hoped he recovered before the stuff hardened.

"YOU GIVE THAT TO SHAMPOO!" declared Shampoo, making a leap.

_WHACK_ went Happosai's pipe, throwing the girl into another room.

Genma leapt. Happosai dodged. Mousse threw chains. Happosai ducked into another room.

"Now let's see," said Happosai as he found a room dedicated to the French Revolution and hid under some woman's skirt.

Happosai started reading the final clue, momentarily unaware that a cat (due to an unfortunate experience with a water cooler) was reading over his shoulder.

Final Clue  
A little ninja who owes favors,  
any food given he savors,  
from the dojo not far,  
in a room of water,  
look deep in the jar.

"Hmmm. AHA! That bucktoothed ninja wannabe!" shouted Happosai. "He's got the final clue."

"That's all we needed to know," said Mousse from somewhere on the other side of the skirts.

_WHACK!_ Genma simply hit the blind boy over the head before turning to flee. He had to get there before the Master.

The mannequinn of a French peasant fell over as someone leapt and ran at high speeds. Happosai needed to get that scroll first.

A cat would get going as well, but first she had to find her way out of the fallen fabric.

* * *

_Elsewhere:_

"Uhm, this doesn't end well does it?" asked Ranma.

The Raven cocked his head to regard him briefly. "Define 'well' in this case."

"Hey, I admit it's happier than getting hit with a meteor, but Akane flying around and zapping stuff - it's gonna come crashing down on me at any minute," protested Ranma.

"Hmmm, so something a little less likely to turn on you?" asked the Raven, making another wing-pass over the washtub. Again the scene shifted.


	4. Chapter 4: Wish gone wrong

Son of Omake  
chapter 3

by myself and Kender_Sci with additional scenes by dogbertcaroll

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes.

* * *

Ranma wasn't quite sure what to expect. The first set of images had involved a meteor strike on Earth and even more unbelievable - him getting together with Kasumi.

The second set had involved Akane getting a powerup and repeatedly zapping Happosai.

Considering his life since coming to Nerima, neither was completely hard to believe. Neither had gone the way he used to though.

Now a third set of unlikely events was forming as images in this old washtub.

"Uhm, so what's this one?" Ranma asked the Raven.

"Oh, you get something that allows you to make a wish, a very very powerful wish," said the Raven with a wink.

"Oh that's bad," said Ranma.

"No, that's good," said the Raven.

"How can that be anything other than a disaster?" asked Ranma.

"Because the mechanism united several different universes into a stable one," said the Raven. "Which is a lot more fun than unstable universes. At least in the long run."

"So what do I wish for?" asked Ranma.

* * *

"I wish the whole fiancee mess was sorted out!"

Everything seemed to stop all at once.

* * *

"Oh crap," said Ranma as the scene paused in the washtub.

"There were three ways that could have been resolved, but you took active control of the energies, fighting them, and this is the result," said the Raven.

"I did what?" asked Ranma.

"As a result, the changes were retconned into reality," said the Raven. "Retroactive Continuity. Meaning the universe changed, but only someone outside that reality or sufficiently connected to other universes would notice."

"I took control of the wish?" asked Ranma.

"You managed to wrestle the energies into basically a situation you could live with," said the Raven, clacking his beak in approval. "Anything Goes indeed."

* * *

"Let's see," said Ranma, grabbing energies and twisting. "Martial Arts Mimicry, can analyze and copy martial arts after seeing it once. Yup, that's me. I'm keeping that."

The roaring pillar of energy seemed to twist in directions that weren't exactly in keeping with normal three-dimensions. Still Ranma took the energy into himself, using it to shift and change other parts of it.

When it faded, Ranma was left and could remember What Had Been. He'd watched some gaijin cartoon last week, and found one character interesting. Batman. A normal human being who trained all his life to be the best, and was holding his own alongside people who had powers and abilities that set them above normal men and women.

Oh, he'd also thought Flash's superspeed and sense of humor was appealing. And man what he couldn't have done with a Green Lantern ring - running off confidence and will? And Superman would have been much cooler with some martial arts training.

None of those paths had particularly appealed to him though. He wanted his own path. It had taken some working, but he'd found it.

He was Spellbreaker. Hit him with magic and it became chi. HIS chi. The spell or curse or effect would get broken apart to its most basic energy and translated. Magic would no longer be his bane, now it would be his b**ch.

Add to that his martial arts knowledge uprated, with his normal strength and speed and healing factor likewise enhanced. Yes, Ranma was feeling pretty good about this as the time he could access that power had faded.

There had been so many details he'd had to grab. He hadn't particularly liked the Chinese Amazon approach to a lot of things, but the village of dedicated female martial artists WAS fine. So it had been changed. Now they were originally from the areas near Greece, refugees who'd wandered until they found a place to settle.

There was the Tendo family. Since he WAS used to having them around, he'd juggled a few things and had it mostly work out.

Back in the late 60s and early 70s had been a notorious panty thief and martial artist named Happosai. Who had seen all the emerging superheroes and supervillains and had shifted with the tide to become Pantyman. Yeah, everyone else pretty much loathed the name but Happosai being Happosai loved it. Wore a pair of women't panties on his head as a mask. A method of empowering minions was found, and two minions were acquired and empowered.

Soun Tendo, aka Waterfall with the ability to generate streams of fresh water, had been one of Pantyman's minions. So had Bounceback, aka Genma Saotome, with his power of turning his body into a bouncy rubber-like substance.

Naturally, they had been referred to as Blubber and Rubber by many.

Eventually they sealed Pantyman in a cave and tried to go legit. To some degree at least.

So Soun Tendo had retired from being supervillain minion to become a dojo owner and active with the local City Council. Genma had done something similar with less success in a neighboring ward. Soun had four children...

Ranma stopped and tried to remember. FOUR? How did that happen?

* * *

Soun Tendo, formerly known as Waterfall, sat on the step leading from his home to his backyard and reflected on things that were and could have been.

Once he had been a normal martial artist, who had sought an easy path to power and fame. Which had led him to apprenticing under a dread Master who had empowered him via mystic means. As Waterfall he had the ability to produce floods of tears. As one pundit had pointed out, many people could cry a river but Soun Tendo could do so literally.

His daughters all held greater power than he himself, if they utilized that. Kasumi was Mistmaiden, able to generate streams of water or a fog at will. She could also sense weather patterns and the presence of water, even control it to some extent.

Nabiki had the ability to shadowport - teleporting from deep shadow to another deep shadow as long as it was within her one hundred meter range. She could also communicate with some animals, mainly mammals. The problem with this latter power was that those animals generally didn't have the sort of attention span or intelligence that would make such a power useful.

Akane could transform herself into animated stone similar in appearance to granite, gaining the strength and durability of hard rock.

Then of course, there was his fourth daughter. He loved and cared for them all, but sometimes his fourth daughter did something distinctly her and at odds from the other three.

Raven.

* * *

Raven was quite obviously adopted. Everyone in the neighborhood knew the story. Soun had been an adventurer when younger, had gone into a Dark Dimension alongside a dozen others. He'd emerged, seven companions shorter, with a limp that had never gone away, and carrying a baby.

Raven was moody, and she was dark and mystically-oriented, and she was gaijin. She was a bit aloof and standoffish.

HER powers were empathic in nature. She could receive emotions, project emotions, and would often get uncontrolled flashes of telepathy. She LOATHED Tatewaki Kuno, seemed to pity Gosunkugi, but tended to go off by herself whenever possible. She also could apparently project an astral form and had some other powers.

"He's coming," said Raven as she sat at the table.

"You already know?" asked Soun, staring.

The fourteen year old girl grimaced. "I've seen."

"Well, how about telling the rest of us," said Nabiki, not for the first time regretting that she had the ability to "Doctor Doolittle" with squirrels and cats and didn't get any sort of precognitive flashes.

"Years ago, I was an adventurer and there was one other who fought alongside me more than any other," said Soun. "We were called-"

"-Blubber and Rubber," finished Raven.

"Yes, that was... no. The Terrific Two!" Soun said.

"Who called you that?" asked Raven.

"Well, that's not important," hedged Soun. "What is important is that we both studied the superheroic martial arts and decided to arrange a marriage between families."

"Is he cute?" asked Nabiki.

"Is he older?" asked Kasumi.

"How depressing, a boy," grumbled Akane.

Raven merely sighed.

"I don't know. I've never met him. So if one of you married my friend's son, it would put my heart at ease," continued Soun.

"He's coming, but there is an obstacle in his way," said Raven, her eyes distant.

"What kind of obstacle?" asked Akane.

"An overly violent one," answered Raven.

* * *

Ranma almost didn't recognize him.

Ryoga Hibiki slowly unfolded from where he'd landed and created a crater, but he was considerably larger and more muscular than Ranma remembered him. Nor did he originally look like he was made out of iron.

"RANMA! At last I have found you!"

"Yo, Ryoga. How's it going? New look for you?" asked Ranma.

"Because of you, Ranma," said Ryoga, bringing his fists together with a clanging noise.

"What? You've seen Hell?" asked Ranma.

"NO! Well, yes," said Ryoga. "Because you weren't at the site of our duel I went looking for you! I ended up in a strange lab!"

"How is that MY fault?" asked Ranma.

"There were four others there, we were bombarded with strange radiation from another universe, and NOW LOOK AT ME!" said Ryoga. He slammed one hand into his chest which resulted in a dull metallic thud.

"You're kinda an 'ironman' now?" asked Ranma. "So your suffering has made you stronger? Kinda like a martial artist?"

"Yes, I mean NO!" said Ryoga. "Now I am Armored Fist, one of the Fantastical Five!"

"Sounds like a British rock band from the '50s or '60s," opined Ranma. "The Fab Four, The Fantastical Five, the Sensational Six..."

"ENOUGH OF YOUR TALK! PREPARE TO DIE!" said Ryoga as he charged forward.

Ranma easily dodged the attack. Ryoga was stronger than ever, and it looked like he'd be very hard to hurt, but his speed was worse.

Then Ranma dodged a vaccuum blast and it was obvious Ryoga hadn't come alone.

"Stand still, varlet, and let the Mighty Swordsman hit thee!" declared a familiar figure.

"Tatewaki Kuno?" asked Ranma, recognizing him even if previously the kendoist hadn't been made of wood.

"My fame proceeds me, as well it should," said Kuno. "Though now my name doth also be Oakheart!"

Ranma leapt over another punch from Ryoga, kicked Kuno in the head, dodged left to avoid a fireburst from Gosunkugi?!

"Just call me Matchstick Boy," said Gosunkugi. "Now everyone will notice murphg!"

Ranma noticed that the aura of flames died out when he'd palmed Gosunkugi's head while leaping over him to avoid a swipe from Kuno. Likewise Kuno's face was sporting a diminishing patch of wood where he'd hit it. That meant-

"These are magical powerups," realized Ranma.

"So?" asked Ryoga.

Ranma smiled the sort of smile that wolves were known to sport, when the prey had wandered close and a meal wouldn't require quite as much effort to acquire as it normally did.

* * *

Raven sighed again. She did that a lot. Considered a 'doom n gloom' girl by most at the school, they tended to avoid the fourteen year old slender girl. Not only was she gaijin, she tended to fall outside the usual 'cute' type.

She floated up to the top of the house, which was considered her territory mainly. None of her sisters was likely to come up here after all.

Her powers were magical in nature, part of her heritage, and were primarily magical effects that emulated traditional psychic powers. Telekinesis, levitation, empathy, and so on.

Which meant that the coming of Spellbreaker, oh yes - she could tell what he was, was going to mean disruption of her normal routine and schedule. Precog wasn't one of her strengths but she understood that hardly anyone was good at that particularly tricky field. She still got flashes and glimpses of what were possibilities, and she could see all sorts of havoc coming this way. Worse, from her perspective, was that SHE was most likely going to have the engagement shoved onto her.

Nabiki was considering supervillainry, or at least being a thief. Her ability to teleport between shadows through a dimension of shadowstuff meant she could get into bank vaults among other things.

Kasumi had Doctor Tofu, not that she realized it. All the other sisters did. Kasumi also had a hang up about age and maturity.

Akane hated boys. Raven didn't think that Akane was lesbian, per se, but that was a possible future. The idea that Akane would gracefully accept an engagement was about as likely as Nabiki getting her to model for a 'loli-goth' photo-shoot.

A plume of dust in the distance indicated the location of Ranma Saotome and the fight she'd foreseen.

Which meant that she'd also likely foreseen correctly that the whole "super community" thing was going to hit the fan soon. Especially now that Tatewaki Kuno had used his resources to get ahold of a sorcerous experimenter and empower a group of individuals. Ryoga Hibiki, Armored Fist, able to transform his body into something like iron. Tatewaki Kuno, Oakheart, able to transform into wood. Hikaru Gosunkugi, Matchstick Boy, able to generate flames. Midorigame, who'd shrunk to the size of a dog and was now able to generate blasts of water. If anyone had actually gained out of the deal, it was probably Midorigame who was now considerably smaller and cuter and smarter. Finally there was Kodachi Kuno, self-styled Dark Mistress Of The Mystic Arts, now with some actual magic instead of sleight-of-hand. Kodachi had element-based powers as the other members of the group, in her case the element of earth.

Raven sighed as she settled into her meditations. She wondered if she'd manage this time. Three. Two. One.

"Sis?"

Raven sighed again. "Yes?"

"You foresaw this 'Ranma' person?"

Raven opened one eye to regard her sister. Nabiki. Who had the ability to speak with animals and to shadowport. Who saw herself as an information broker. "I can't tell you if you're going to resell anything."

"Why not?" asked Nabiki, trying to look innocent.

"Because I've foreseen that as well," said Raven, closing that eye and settling back into her lotus position. "It would be bad."

"How bad?" asked Nabiki.

"VERY bad," said Raven. "'Yakuza killing Akane and pumping you full of drugs to tell everything you knew before they turned you into a breeder of superpowered minions' level of bad."

"Oh," said Nabiki. Try as she might, she couldn't find a way to look at that and call it a Happy Ending. "Okay, that's bad."

Raven sighed and settled back into her meditation as Nabiki left, clearing her mind.

"Raven?"

"Grrrrrr," growled Raven as she now opened an eye to regard Akane. "I'm trying to meditate."

"Well, it's just if you knew anything about this Ranma..." said Akane.

"Can't tell you," said Raven. "I've foreseen it. You blab details in public when he's said something that infuriates you, followed by nastiness. You end up dead. Let's not go there."

"Oh," said Akane. "That's pretty bad." Dying sounded pretty bad to her. She could handle herself pretty well, especially if she turned to stone - but she also remembered what had happened last time she'd gotten knocked into the water while stoned.

"Yes it is," said Raven as she watched Akane leave. She tapped her fingers against one leg briefly, waiting, then got up to look for Kasumi.

Kasumi was in the kitchen, looking thoughtful.

"Yes," said Raven without preamble. "I've foreseen Ranma coming here. Yes, he's bringing problems. No, he doesn't have any particular foods he likes. No, he's not older than you. On the other hand, he's not particularly boring. Yes, he knows how to deal with people who have special powers and abilities - he has a few of those himself. Yes, he's got other girls associated with him who will come by. One of whom is an alien from another planet with a strange culture and even stranger food preferences. Yes, he knows Batman personally but Batman doesn't normally GIVE autographs because it's against his dark and mysterious image. No, I don't know much more than that because my glimpses of the future don't exactly come with footnotes or afterwords."

"Oh," said Kasumi, not used to Raven being so talkative.

"Now I'm going to go back to try and meditate because things are going to get a lot louder here in the near future," said Raven.

"Okay, have fun," said Kasumi.

Raven rolled her eyes and muttered something as she went back up the stairs, mainly commenting on how Kasumi's remark indicated how little her sisters understood her need for meditation.

* * *

Kasumi considered while she set up the ricemaker.

Raven was normally quiet, sullen even.

Raven had grown quite animated while speaking of their soon-to-arrive guest Ranma.

Kasumi nodded to herself, a smile curving her features. Clearly Raven was finally growing up and showing some interest in boys.

* * *

Nabiki let out a deep breath as she studied the ceiling of her room from her position on her bed.

A boy, eh? The cryptic comments from Raven indicated that this 'Ranma' was someone with secrets. Secrets that the Yakuza would be interested in.

She had a certain degree of self-preservation. She also knew that the Yakuza had been nosing about for metahumans of late, particularly those that were either on the 'supervillain' or 'trying to pass for normal' sides. That was explained because if they went after the heroes and those who were considered allies of the police - the police tended to react as if the Yakuza were targetting law enforcement specifically. Which meant that bribes might not be sufficient.

It wasn't like she could erase incidents over the years where her abilities had come into play. All of the Tendo family knew to maintain secret identities - but they had slipped from time to time.

Draw attention to herself, and yeah - it could be bad.

Nabiki mused that over and decided it sounded like Ranma would be kind of high-profile. Best to foist him off on someone else.

* * *

Raven was the safest choice. As the youngest Tendo, nobody would be getting married right away in any case.

Akane was a little confused. She had a reputation as Furinkan's resident lesbian. Which she was NOT. She just didn't like boys. At least she thought so.

Gaining a fiance would help put down that rumor, and she might be able to distance herself from Tatewaki Kuno and his attempts to 'woo her back to the proper path' or whatever catchphrase he was going on about now.

Still, this 'Ranma' was a BOY. She knew all about boys after all. They were all stupid, perverted, greedy, grasping, smelly, dumb, sex-crazed, repetitive, IDIOTS.

What she needed was a way to deflect the engagement. She didn't have any...

Hey, Raven! Raven didn't like boys either but she was too young to marry anyway. Perfect!

Raven's head slumped in mid-meditate. "idiot sisters."

The precog winced at a glimpse of a potential future. Apparently the alien girl associating with Ranma would be coming into their lives soon.

* * *

Blackfire, aka K'omander, was a first class something-you-can't-say-on-network-TV. This was not simply Ranma's opinion, it was the opinion of many of those who had interacted with her or just heard her list of dirty deeds (done cheap(free in some cases)) from various other sources.

Not only had she dealt with her sister harshly - she'd had to deal with cadet branches and other concerns just so that there would be NO other candidates for the throne or someone to lead a rebellion.

K'ontour was one such minor family member, implanted with an experimental 'slave chip' by the Psions, then sold off to Gordanian slavers, who quickly found out that the new slave had a phrase that they learned to dread hearing.

"Oopsie."

Nor was that the only such phrase.

"I'm sure that'll come out in the wash."

Some were even more dreaded.

"I can fix that!"

While some were considered Nightmare Fuel for those who survived the experience.

"Ooooh, what's this do?"

To be fair, she was just so friendly and helpful that it was hard to fault her on that. She certainly TRIED to be a good slave.

"Well, THAT didn't work - let me try again!"

It was just that there was such a gap between Desire and Application.

All of which had led to a scene in the past.

* * *

"You - you have defeated me, human," said the Gordanian. "Therefore... HERE!"

Ranma blinked as a girl in a maid outfit was thrust at him. "Huh?"

Suddenly all the Gordanians were near the lift for their shuttle.

"She's a slave from Tamaran, and if she ever returns there - the lives of the rest of her family are forfeit," said the smiling Gordanian. "We're not to kill her but... Have fun!"

"Wha?" repeated Spellbreaker/Ranma as the Gordanians ran back to their ship.

"Oh, so I have a NEW Master?" asked the golden skinned and curvaceous alien. "Uhm, hi!"

"WHAT?!" yelped Spellbreaker/Ranma as the Gordanian ship lifted off at very-high speeds and went into warp at the first opportunity. "WHAT?!"

"So, uhm, hold on, there's a dangly thread there," said K'ontour.

_tug - FWUMP!_

"WHAT?!" repeated Spellbreaker/Ranma as somehow his costume had just unravelled and he was left wearing underwear and a mask.

* * *

Raven knew this. Raven also knew that K'ontour was doing better nowadays after the Psions' control chip was removed from her brain. Though she STILL apparently liked the whole 'alien slavegirl' role and refused to be set free. Still tried to get into her Master's pants. Still had trouble with contractions and making alien food and other problems.

* * *

She was young, about the same age as Raven in fact. She lacked the big bounciness of her cousin Koriand'r. She certainly lacked the cruel edge of her other cousin Komand'r.

She could also fly, had a certain degree of superstrength, and could fire off bolts of green energy. She wasn't as powerful as her cousins, frequently napped when she could find some sunbeams to nap in, and LOVED Dance Dance Revolution and its variants.

She had decided at one point that it was proper for a slavegirl to accompany her Master on his adventures as a crimefighter. It had been pointed out that she couldn't be Ranma's slavegirl in public if she was also Spellbreaker's associate. That sort of thing would bust his secret identity wide open.

She didn't understand the whole secret identity thing, but finally found a solution.

Using something like Ranma's own tendency to take whatever he could scrounge to use himself, K'ontour finagled one of the other League members to work out a skintight black costume that could spread out from her bracers to cover her completely, but which was 90% transparent to ultraviolet rays so she could still recharge her powers with it on.

Spaceninja was the mysterious companion to Spellbreaker. K'ontour was a reluctant Ranma's slavegirl.

That both were clumsy as hell, disaster-prone, and had similar powers was explained as they were of the same species. K'ontour was taller and more slender. Spaceninja was bustier and shorter. That K'ontour was very sensitive about her lack of chest development was further proof they weren't the same Tamaranian.

Raven sighed and got down from the roof. The explosions, sounds of violence, and other signs of Ranma getting delayed had ended. That meant they'd be arriving soon.

"Might as well get this over with," grumped Raven as the fourteen year old phased through the roof to land on the second floor.

* * *

"ranmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" GLOMP! "NMA!"

Ranma found himself in a mid-air glomp with a very familiar individual. "Heya, K'ontour."

"I miss you so much," gushed the affectionate girl as she snuggled herself into what she felt was a proper glomp, using her flight ability to keep the two of them dangling in the air.

"Uh yeah, you've been gone a whole three days," said Ranma. "So how's your cousin?"

"K'oriander is very bouncy," said K'ontour.

"Uh. Yeah. I suppose she is," said Ranma. "I think you've got the wrong word there."

"Robin took her out to date," said K'ontour, turning loose Ranma so she could clasp her hands in front of herself.

"Oof," said Ranma as he landed on the ground.

"They went on the Wheel Of The Ferris and shared liquid refreshment," gushed K'ontour happily.

"Sounds good," said Ranma as he picked himself up and dusted off.

"There are three star-faring species where such activity would constitute a marriage proposal," gushed further K'ontour.

"Are one of those races Tamaranians?" asked Ranma.

"No, at least I have not heard so," said K'ontour.

"Then that's fine," said Ranma, walking away. "If Robin was married, I'd probably have to send him a note saying so. Some of your customs ain't exactly intuitive."

"Oh no," said K'ontour, floating along and only occasionally bumping into stationary objects. "Tamaranian marriages are not that dissimilar from Earth marriages. My cousin and I discussed such things at Tower Of The Titans. We especially enjoyed the 'movie night' feature as it turned out that the Beastly Boy's movie rental was not the one that the case featured."

"Oh?" asked Ranma, a little absently as he leaped up, grabbed K'ontour's leg, and dragged her down before she could hit her head on a traffic signal.

"Yes, the outer encasement stated that the movie was of 'Calling All Monsters' but the actual movie was something called 'The Stepford Desperate House Wives' when it became obvious to the others that this was not the right film," said K'ontour. "It contained much useful data about Earth mating practices."

"Wha?" asked Ranma. "That don't sound good at all."

"They shut down the 'movie night' but I exhorted my cousin to watch it later on with myself," said K'ontour. "It was quite educational."

"Maybe I SHOULD send Robin a warning note," said Ranma, giving serious thought to the idea.

"I had no idea about the use of Earth food in such rituals," said K'ontour. "Or that Earth females regarded the setting of traps and ambush to be proper protocol for dating."

"That's it," decided Ranma. "Where's a phone? I've GOT to warn Robin."

* * *

"Hello? Ahhh, hello, Friend Ranma. No, I am sorry, but Robin is tied up at the moment and can not come to the phone. I will have him contact you later, when he is freed once more. Bai bai!"

_*click*_

Starfire, wearing the cap from a French maid outfit, a G-string, and carrying a feather duster, returned to her room.

Robin was tied, naked (yet still wearing his mask) and spread eagle to her bed with a ball gag in his mouth.

"Robin, I have studied your cultural dating practices in depth, thanks to Beast Boy's movie and the marker-of-books he had saved on his computer and have figured out that it is up to me to make the next 'move'. When I arrived here, you taught me English by the exchange of saliva in lip to lip contact. I believe it is now time for me to teach you my language by lip to lip contact."

Robin stopped struggling against his bonds and relaxed a bit, figuring that things weren't as bad as they seemed. Starfire had obviously gotten some signals crossed, but she wasn't under alien control or been corrupted by exposure to Beast Boy's 'marker-of-books'.

Starfire smiled shyly at the bound boy wonder. "Of course the data exchange port for teaching is not in the same place as it is for a Tamaranian learning a new language."

Robin's eyes took up a quarter of his face as her G-string dropped to the floor.

* * *

Ranma shrugged and put his phone away. 'Oh well, better him than me.'

"Master, would you like to learn to speak Tamaranian?" K'ontour asked nervously, aware that she was skipping over several steps, according to what she understood about Earth's mating practices, but a bit jealous over her cousin's closer relationship with her own boy-friend.

Ranma scratched his chin thoughtfully. "I dunno, I suck at learning languages, so it'll probably take me a couple of years to get really good at it and that's with regular practice, butﾅ sure, why not. It would be useful to be able to talk and not worry about being overheard."

The alien girl blushed heavily. 'Ranma is so forward!'

"When we got some spare time and you feel up to it, let me know."

K'ontour glowed with affection. 'And he is letting me set the pace. He is so thoughtful!'

Ranma's eyes darted around the street, searching for whatever it had been that had set off his danger sense.

* * *

Cyborg, Beast Boy, Bumblebee, and speedy had faced off against Gizmo, Jinx, and Mammoth.

The fight had started off as a typical encounter between the Titans and the Hive graduates, but then Jinx and let slip that they were being paid by Starfire, to distract them so she could have some uninterrupted time with Robin. Beast Boy had been all for charging back and making sure Robin was safe, but Mammoth and Cyborg had both coughed *cock blocker* and things had degenerated from there into a massive argument about each team's timing interfering in the other's personal lives and how some members of their own team had horrible timing all on their own.

"I wonder what his new name will be," Jinx said as everyone had paused to take a breather.

"What do you mean?" Beast Boy asked, rubbing his rear from where Bumblebee had stung him after complaining about his habit of busting into people's rooms when he heard moans.

"Well, he's not exactly going to be calling himself, Robin the BOY wonder anymore, is he?" Mammoth pointed out, being a lot quicker on the uptake than most people gave him credit for.

"Hmmm," the entire group replied.

"I'd say Batman, but I doubt he's going to get a new costume just because his prot?has grown up a bit," Speedy said.

"It'll probably stick with the bird theme if we're skipping bats," Gizmo muttered.

"I have to say the costume will be darker. No more bright colors," Jinx pointed out to everyone's agreement.

"I think he'll probably swipe some idea off Batman for it. Batman probably has a dozen or so past IDs as hero or villain setup for some case he worked on in the past," Speedy pointed out.

"Maybe," Beast Boy acquiesced.

"Want me to hack the Bat's computers and find out some possibles?" Gizmo offered.

"Can you do that?" Cyborg asked, stunned at the thought of trying to break Batman's security.

"I can try."

"Nah, let's call Batgirl and see if she has any idea," Bumblebee suggested, unaware of the massive wave of gossip that was shortly going to be making the rounds.

* * *

Batgirl explained it.

Batman acted as if he had a headache.

The Flash wondered why he didn't meet agressive alien chicks.

Hawkgirl stated that alien women were not 'chicks' and that it was most likely that Starfire was just fed up with stupid Earth customs.

Kara, among others, wondered if that was the sort of thing that was required to move romantic relationships along.

Wonder Woman glanced over at Batman with a thoughtful expression.

Various male superheroes got various chills running along various spines and/or equivalents.

* * *

Ranma casually grabbed K'ontour's arm and pulled her out of the street before she could get run over again. At this point he hardly noticed little things like that, it was just an automatic reflex. When K'ontour was around, keep checking to see what she might be running into or blowing up or things of that nature.

"Tendo dojo, here we are," said Ranma. "This is the place Pops said to come to. I wonder what we're supposed to do here?"

"Fight the dojo owner?" asked K'ontour, pointing to the sign.

"I doubt it," said Ranma. "Well, might as well get it over with."

He raised his hand to knock. The door swung open before he could finish.

"At LAST, the schools can be joined!"

"What?" asked Ranma.

"You are merging schools?" asked K'ontour. "Is that not what they call 'redistricting'?"

"Uhm, who are you, again?" asked Nabiki.

"I am K'ontour," said K'ontour with a bow. The Japanese did a lot of this. When on Earth, subarea Rome, perform in a manner keeping with the prevailing cultural bias. "I am Tamaranian and Ranma's slave."

"An alien slavegirl?!" asked Akane, suitably aghast.

"Oh yes, and I remain Ranma's slavegirl so that my cousin does not put any of my family members through creative and violent means of dying," said K'ontour. "I am glad to meet you."

Raven sighed.

"WHAT?!" asked Akane, certain that there was a high degree of pervertedness in this situation.

"She's my student in the martial arts," tried Ranma, as he was used to people blowing up at him for things that weren't his fault.

"Oh," said Akane. Student-sensei relationship, with some weird alien interpretation coming out of it. That was better.

"So pick the one you like," Soun blundered on, "she'll be your new fiancee."

"WHAT?!" asked Ranma.

"Oh my, he wants Raven," said Kasumi.

"Oh definitely," seconded Nabiki.

"Couldn't agree more," chimed in Akane.

"Throw me to the wolves, why don't you?" grumbled Raven.

"I think I must not have understood something," said a puzzled K'ontour. "How can she be Ranma's fiancee when they have not exchanged bodily fluids? And how are wolves involved?"

"WHAT?!" asked Akane.

* * *

"The exchange of bodily fluids is part of Earth mating practices, yes?" K'ontour asked. Not to mention the mention of wolves. There had been no wolves in that movie? Was this another weird Earth custom she'd missed?

"Yeah, but this is an arranged marriage, so the order is different," Ranma pointed out, regaining a bit of his equilibrium as he realized that even on a new world some things weren't apparently going to change. "We have to know each other a lot better before any fluid exchangeﾅ err kissing is involved."

Akane settled down as she realized that it was just another misunderstanding caused by their different cultures. 'I guess he's used to those.'

Raven knew that it was going to turn out this way, but she still had to ask, "So, you don't mind being engaged to me as opposed to one of my sisters?"

"Nah, that's fine. I'm sure it beats being beat on for being a 'perverted male' or used in scams or engaged to someone I'd see as a mother figure."

Raven raised an eyebrow, wondering if he had a touch of precognition too.

Akane just smiled, happy to have slipped out of the engagement and silently agreeing that he was a perverted male.

Nabiki wondered where he got his information from, since he clearly knew enough about them to know what their responses would be, but hadn't known about the engagement.

Kasumi smiled pleasantly, as always, but a small corner of her mind was worrying over the fact that he saw her as a mother figure despite the fact that they'd just met. 'Am I that unattractive? He's only a couple of years younger than me, he should see me as desirable, right?'

Ranma stood up when his watch beeped. "I'd love to continue this conversation, but I have training. I'll be back in three hours."

"Hold on, there's a dangly thread there," said K'ontour.

_TUG - FWUMP!_

Ranma's pants became a cloud of threads that fell to the floor, as he was outlined in a shimmering light and vanished.

"Where did he go?" Akane demanded.

K'ontour pulled out a day planner and started paging through it. "Ranma has training with Batman in the afternoon today."

"Batman, is training Ranma?!" yelled all the native Tendos.

The alien looked at the girls as if they had just told her the sun was blue. "Don't be silly."

Everyone relaxed a little, thinking it was indeed silly to imagine Batman training the boy they'd just met.

"Ranma is training Batman. Ranma's got a job, helping the better hand to hand fighters of the JLA improve their techniques."

* * *

Flash turned to Hawkgirl. "OK, who bet he'd be sans pants this time?" Hawkgirl smirked LOTS.

* * *

"What do you mean, he's training Batman?" asked Akane. Akane knew reputations, she respected them. Batman had a pretty darn good reputation.

"He works with a lot of the superior martial artists," said K'ontour, sitting down and making a dismissive gesture. "He's the new O-Sensei since the last one died."

THAT caused the Tendo girls, with the exception of Raven who hadn't had much interest in those Arts, to once again utter various noises of disbelief. It was a martial arts household after all, one in which the individuals had superpowers of one sort or another. O-Sensei was a rumor of a martial artist master who had been around for one hundred and fifty years. A grandmaster of dozens of styles of kung fu and karate and other martial arts.

"O-Sensei is real?" asked Akane, sounding a little subdued.

"Yes," said K'ontour. "At least he was. He got washed overboard in a typhoon a few years ago. Left Ranma the title. So, Raven, should we undergo the bonding ceremony of human teenage females and travel to the Mall Of Shopping?"

"No thank you," grumbled Raven.

"So, he's really good?" asked Nabiki.

K'ontour shrugged. "I am not certain. He has not allowed me to exchange bodily fluids with him. I do not think he has exchanged bodily fluids with anyone." She didn't count when she had learned his Earth languages from him. That was to learn languages, after all.

"That was SO not what I was talking about," said Nabiki.

* * *

_Ring ring ring. ka-klik_

"This is Bruce Wayne's residence, unfortunately the Master is not at home. Do you wish to speak to his voice mail?"

"No. This is Alfred, right? Actually I wanted to speak to you."

"Me, ma'am? Whatever for?"

"This IS a scrambled line, isn't it?"

"It's as secure as could be made with various technologies available to Wayne Industries, yes, and your side is even more secure from what I understand."

"This is Diana Prince. I'm an acquaintance of Bruce's."

"Ah, yes. I had rather guessed that from the Caller ID displaying 'Justice League Watchtower' but it's nice to be confirmed. Is this then a professional call?"

"No. Personal actually. I'd like to know when I could schedule some time with Bruce. Perhaps a couple of days?"

"That'll be a bit off from now, at least two months. His social calender is quite full, what with his hobbies and work with the various agencies."

"Oh. No significant time away?"

"Hmmm. I believe that he's got a three hour block this Friday between a Wayne Foundation policy meeting and his nightly hobby. I can pencil you in for then. I would have to wonder at such a thing, as a woman associated with the Justice League wanting such time."

"Some matters I wish to bring up, and to explore."

"Suitably mysterious then," said Alfred. "A personal matter of exploration. This Friday then, at roughly seven p.m.?"

"That sounds workable, thank you, Alfred."

"My pleasure, Ms Prince," said Alfred, putting the phone back in the cradle. "And good luck."

Alfred Thaddeus Crane Pennyworth considered the call, and considered what he knew. He'd met a number of the Justice League over the years, and he knew or suspected more. He was also quite aware of Bruce Wayne's reluctance to allow emotional intimacy. The physical aspects, yes. It was apparent to him at least, that someone had decided to take the initiative.

Well, it was about time.

* * *

He was an orphan, adopted by a childless couple in the American Farm Belt. He was also a hero.

He was strong enough that he felt he lived in a world of cardboard, that a single muscle twitching at the wrong time could kill people. That it was a good thing he didn't catch a cold or the next time he sneezed could take out most of a city block. He couldn't be hurt by practically any mundane means, and the typical modern army could throw their entire arsenals against him with relatively minor effect.

"Why did I just get this awful chill?" asked the Man Of Steel as he stood near the various telecommunications stations that relayed happenings on the planet below to the Justice League.

"Because of the news I just received," said Jonn Jonzz as he floated up through the floor. "There's currently an invasion force heading for Earth."

"Earth is going to be invaded again? I've never understood that," said Superman. "Almost every star has planets in or near the habitable zone. One in ten would only require minor terraforming technologies. One in a dozen stars even has a planet or moon with an existing habitable belt."

"That isn't it," said the Martian Manhunter, pulling a pair of suitcases out of his cape.

"Nice trick," admitted Superman.

"Hyperdimensional pocket," said the Manhunter. "If you get one, you'll quickly wonder how you ever did without one. No, the problem is that the invasion force isn't here to conquer or destroy the planet."

"Infiltration?" asked Superman, unsure of why the Manhunter looked so nervous.

"Not as such, no," said the Manhunter. "Earth has become a planet where various alien species have their last surviving representitives. My race of Martians and your own Kryptonians for example."

"Yes, I've noticed that," said Superman.

"A group is coming to ensure that those species don't die out," said the Manhunter, moving quickly to the transporter and putting in a set of coordinates.

"So they're coming here to stick yellow radio collars on you or something?" asked Green Arrow, who'd been lazing back in his chair and keeping an eye on various screens for any emergency.

"Not quite," said the Manhunter, in a voice as dry as a Martian desert in summer. "How would you ensure a species continued?"

"Well, by making sure it had..." Green Arrow stopped watching the video feeds as ideas started popping into his head. "Wait a minute. You mean? No. Couldn't be."

"You're kidding?" asked Superman. "You mean they're going to try cloning or something, right?"

"No," said the Manhunter. "Not kidding. I'm going to hide rather than put up with what is sure to be a very undignified comedy of errors and misunderstandings."

"I..." Superman found himself at a loss of what to say for once. "I think I'll be at the Fortress of Solitude. You know how to reach me in an emergency." ZOOM!

"Seriously?" asked Green Arrow, looking completely flabbergasted despite the mask covering his eyes.

"Yes, though considering what I've intercepted, they may simply go after any unattached Earth males of especially great accomplishment or ability," said the Martian Manhunter, ending the conversation by beaming out.

"WHAT?!" squeaked the Green Arrow.

"What what?" asked Wonder Woman as she exited the turbolift.

Green Arrow glanced at her, considered, made a few pointing and interrogative gestures, then gave that up as a lost cause. "Let me replay the security cam, cause otherwise you'll NEVER believe me."

* * *

"You're kidding? THAT long? Hmmm, how would I verify it?"

Tamaranian men were about the Galactic Average as far as lovers were concerned. Five minutes tops.

Having learned that Earth men (or at least top-rated martial artists) could go much longer than that was going through hyperspatial gossip circuits to a variety of individuals who found this to be very interesting.

A large number of male individuals on Earth kept getting ominous feelings. A number of those mystically inclined, however, simply went on vacation.

* * *

"Oh HELL," said Raven.

"Hell - a small town in Arizona," said K'ontour. "There's also one in Michigan."

"No, well, I suppose it is, but that is NOT what I meant," said Raven.

"Are we not at the Mall Of Shopping?" asked K'ontour. "Is this not in Japan?"

"That is NOT the correct definition," said Raven, leaning against a wall and covering her face with both hands.

"Oh," said K'ontour. "Then this involves the giant flightless bird demon named Pou-Tree?"

"What do you know about the... no," said Raven. "I get visions of the future. It's sort of a mix of clairvoyance and precognition, but not completely under my control."

"You received a vision of the dreaded Lord Of Chickens?" asked K'ontour.

"This 'girl-bonding' thing is SO not working," said Raven. "Look, can we forget about chickens for now?"

"No?" asked K'ontour. "But they are quite tasty if you add the sauce of mustard."

"Your cousin told someone in space," said Raven. "Your cousin put the word out in that she has a major stud-boy on tap."

"It is normal behavior on Tamaran that when one has succeeded in finding a male mate to commence the session of bragging about the sort of qualities that one found attractive," said K'ontour. "It is an ancient tradition."

"I... Actually, I think there's a human equivalent, but we focus on the shortcomings..." Raven shook her head. "No. Your cousin has unleashed a problem that will be causing great hardship for many Earth humans."

"Oh that is bad," agreed K'ontour. "How does my cousin engaging in the ancient custom of mate-bragging endanger Earth?"

"Because..." said Raven, wondering if she should say that. If she could say this. "Alien girls have alien boyfriends, right?"

"Normally this IS the case," agreed K'ontour, turning back to go through swimsuits.

"Alien boyfriends are normally of the same or a compatible species, right?" asked Raven.

"Yes," said K'ontour, trying to catch a salesgirl's attention. Which seemed to be difficult despite the proximity of three of them. "Though not always. I recall a relationship between a Cizzballian and a Quezcoutlian. Very odd."

Raven grimaced. Keeping things on subject with K'ontour seemed very difficult. "Well, how many races would human males be 'compatible' with?"

"At last count?" asked K'ontour, thinking for a moment. "I believe the subject came up once. Roughly ten thousand three hundred and fifty two within this Galactic Arm and attendent subdimensions."

"Ten... thousand?!" asked Raven, momentarily aghast. "err. Right. And how many would consider someone like, oh, Robin - to be err. How do I say this?"

"Prime grade A beefcake? Superior Snugglebunny material?" asked K'ontour.

"How do you even know terms like that?" asked Raven. "No. Nevermind. I don't want to know. Yeah. That's what I mean."

K'ontour considered that, before turning to Raven with a horrified expression. "You mean they will come here to steal away Robin from K... Starfire?!"

"Something like that," said Raven.

One of the girls nearby shrieked. "Alien girls are coming to steal our boys?!"

"They can have my ex..." said one of the salesgirls.

"The general public needs to hear all this?" asked Raven, who'd thought the conversation quiet enough in volume not to register.

"Oh, do not worry friend Raven," said K'ontour, holding up an alien gadget. "This device is an identity masker. I am not sure how it works, but it keeps names and things and even what we look like disguised."

"Handy," said Raven.

"I do not know why Spectre-kun said I needed such a thing," said K'ontour. "But everyone agree so I take with me."

"That might not be enough," said Raven as she noticed girls talking about this amongst themselves.

* * *

_Elsewhere:_

"That is so screwed up," said Ranma.

"Yeah, cool isn't it?" asked the Raven.

"I'm not sure that's how I'd describe it," hedged Ranma.


	5. Chapter 5: Of Cyberdyne and Fireflies

Son of Omake  
chapter 4: Cyberdyne and Fireflies

by myself and Kender_Sci

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes.

* * *

"Aw, c'mon. A wish?" asked Ranma. "Ain't these alternate universe thingies supposed to be like when you take a right turn instead of a left turn?"

"Oh, there are some of those too," indicated the Raven, passing a wing over the washtub/scrying pool again.

As the image formed, Ranma frowned. "When's this take place?"

"Four days prior to Kasumi's birthday, which she was going to celebrate in the Western fashion mainly because she'd found a cake recipe she wanted to try," said the Raven.

"Yeah, I ended up getting her a coupon for okonomiyaki," said Ranma, shrugging. "It's not like I ever got any money that Pops or Nabiki wasn't trying to get it away from me."

"Well," said the Raven. "This all starts because at the right moment you had an idea where you could GET that money. And so you turn left instead of right."

* * *

_In the scrying pool:_

Ranma stopped roof hopping near the district border. This should be about the right place. He'd heard of it and been wanting to check this out.

A street gang composed of seventeen year old thugs called the Bakaro Street Boys had set up near a Middle School and was beating up on little girls on their way there. Ranma had picked the Bakaro Street Boys as his source of income for Kasumi's present because:  
A) Nobody would care if he beat the hell out of these punks.  
B) He didn't like bullies that beat up little girls.  
C) He didn't have any money.

Then he could get a nice present and not have to deal with the two fathers pulling some crap. Well, he could hope, couldn't he?

* * *

The group of teenaged punks smirked as they watched the girls, looking for their next target. They liked to be real choosey like, and picked only just the right girls to beat up. They had standards to maintain after all. but there was always someone, and they enjoyed what they did.

Seeing one who looked especially good, they went to move, only to hear a throat being cleared. They turned and saw a pigtailed boy of about their age, leaning against a lamp post and smirking at them.

"Where are ya guys goin?" asked the pigtailed boy.

Each of the gang members looked at each other before one of them spoke. "We're going where we want to go!"

"Nah, you're not."

"Who are you to tell us where we can go?!"

"Me? I'm Ranma Saotome."

"Really? Wow. I'm so underwelmed! Let's teach this jerk a lesson guys!"

"YEAH!" chroused the other gang members.

Cracking his knuckles, Ranma straightened up. "Your funeral."

"GET HIM!"

"Get who?" asked a new voice.

Both Ranma and the gang turned to see a bewildered banadana clad boy. "Ryouga?" asked Ranma.

"Ranma? What are you doing here?" asked the Lost Boy.

"I was just gonna teach these jerks a lesson."

"Just why do you want to teach anyone a lesson?"

"'Cause these guys call themselves the 'Bakayaro Street Boys'..."

"That's the 'Bakaro Street Boys'!" yelled a gang member.

"Pheh, whatever. But they've been beating up on girls, so I thought I would..."

"Hold on," interrupted Ryouga, "These guys are the Bakaro boys?"

"Yeah, and I don't wanna fight with ya..."

"Good, since I don't want to fight you right now."

"So, what d'ya wanna do?"

Dropping his pack down with a thud, the Lost Boy grinned. "I want to help you pound these losers."

Ranma blinked for a moment and then shrugged. "Okay, if ya wanna."

"Good. I've been wanting to do this."

This time the gang members were a bit confused. The confused state didn't last very long though, because that's when the pain started.

* * *

They were the Bakaro Street Boys. For five months, they had operated near one of two Girl's Middle Schools. Their operations had consisted of beating on little girls, taking everything valuable they had, and selling said items. If the girl gave up all her valuables easily, they'd just twist her arm or something. Anyone who looked tough they tended to stay away from. They were mean and tough predators, or at least that's how they viewed themselves, but they weren't the Top Wolves around.

If, say, a fighter with a major reputation or a cop showed up - they'd melt away into the shadows and return later when the threat had passed. They were all over sixteen, and their chosen prey were little girls of under fourteen years age.

They operated just far enough away from Furinkan that they hadn't heard of 'Ranma Saotome' or 'Ryouga Hibiki'. Besides, what could these two do?

Even if they were martial artists, so were some of the BSB! Kensuke was first-dan in tae kwon doe. Tran was pretty good at that Muay Thai stuff. Del Gai watched a lot of martial arts movies! Matsushiro was a brown belt in karate! The other three had weapons!

* * *

Ryouga had his pet peeves. One of which was people picking on the weak. He'd heard of the Bakaro Street Boys from a few tearful little girls, one of whom had cried out her troubles to this cute little piglet she'd found.

Ranma would eventually be punished, and vengeance would at last be found at the hands of Ryouga Hibiki. That wasn't as important as this though. Bullies who went around hurting little girls?

No. These guys were the priority.

* * *

One of the BSB decided to open things up by flicking his butterfly knives around and then stabbing at the really-pissed off looking guy with the bandana.

Ryouga might have lacked Ranma's speed, but was still fast enough to grab a wrist and begin applying pressure.

Akuhito screamed like a dying rabbit as he felt his wrist bones being compacted together. He tried to stab with his other hand at the boy.

Ryouga caught that arm too, which was when he made a sudden twist and jerk that put the elbow joints under some serious strain.

"I think you made him mad," observed Ranma as the other gang members gaped. "Be glad he hasn't heard what else you've done with little girls." Ranma was thinking of stolen First Kisses and the like - that sort of thing he'd heard of. After Mikado Sanzennin he could empathize somewhat.

Ryouga heard this and came to a completely different conclusion. Bones cracked as pressure ramped up to levels normally requiring hydraulic equipment.

"Well, I wanted a good fight," said Tran, spitting his cigarette out onto the ground. "Looks like I'll just have to teach you two to mind your betters."

"I don't see any betters here," said Ranma. "What about you, Ryouga?"

Ryouga dropped the first thug. "You talking or fighting?"

"Yeesh, in martial arts movies we'd at least get to exchange insults a couple of times," griped Ranma, dodging an elbow strike and imbedding his fist into the Muay Thai artist's stomach until it was practically touching the spinal column. "It's not like these bozo street boys are a threat."

Ryouga grabbed some guy who was using simple karate attack, tugged him closer, then dropped him with a head butt. "Every so often, Ranma, you're right about something. Not often though."

"Hey!" Ranma complained, ducking under a flying kick and kidney punching the boy as he went past. "I'm not that bad."

Ryouga grabbed two heads and smacked them together. "Oh really?"

Ranma dropped the others quickly. No point in letting Ryouga get ahead of him on points. "Okay, now let's go ahead."

"What are you doing?" Ryouga asked as Ranma started putting together a pile of jewelry, weapons, wallets, and spare change.

"Kasumi's birthday is coming up. I don't want to have to deal with Nabiki's loan rates," said Ranma as he started seperating things into two piles.

"All of that stuff had original owners, you know," Ryouga pointed out.

"How are ya gonna figure out what went where?" Ranma inquired. "You can have all this 'Hello Kitty' junk."

"Why would I... oh. Never mind." Ryouga shrugged as he figured out why items decorated with little SD cats wouldn't appeal to Ranma.

"One for you, one for me," started Ranma. This should be enough for a nice present even splitting it with Ryouga.

"Hah!" hahhed Ryouga. "You get Kasumi a present! Well, I'll get her a better present!"

"Oh yeah?" Ranma fumed. "Well, I'll get her a present that leaves yours in the dust!"

"Oh yeah?"

"YEAH!"

"We'll see about that, Ranma! You wouldn't know a good present to get her if it bit you! I'll bet you'd get her something tacky like a breadmaking machine or a hot water dispenser!"

Ranma blinked for a moment. How had Ryouga known he'd planned on getting Kasumi one of those "instant hot water" thingies? "Oh yeah. You just wait, P-chan!"

* * *

Ranma fairly stomped away from where he had been talking with Ryouga. There was no way that the Lost Boy was going to get the best of him! That was for certain. This was a challenge and Ranma Saotome never lost one of those and he didn't plan on starting now.

He was going to find Kasumi a GREAT present, and when he did, that'd show Ryouga. She'd be so happy that she'd never even notice whatever little junk that the walking piece of bacon got her. Which meant that he'd have to forego just looking for something that might be good from just any old store and go straight for the _best_ shops around. Only the most exclusive and/or unusual shops would do.

Unfortunately, that included stores that were not terribly... normal. These were shops that lent themselve to the more unusual items for sale. Some of those things happened to be rather... not so good for one's continued existance.

Ranma leapt into an unfamiliar alleyway and came to a complete stop.

Weeks ago, the power had gone out (someone had smashed a transformer which had ended up taking out a major substation) for several hours. People had gathered around and told ghost stories.

Ranma had told them of something he'd run across on the way back through China, an inn where the guests had a tendency to turn up missing. Cologne had informed everyone that she knew of the place, and a kitsune was actually responsible for the mischief there.

Cologne's own turn came up, and she told about The Little Shop That Wasn't There Yesterday. It usually looked like something out of a Charles Dickens film or maybe HP Lovecraft. Then she started naming off stores.

Ranma's eyes were wide and he could feel his own heart beating away as he read off names. Once he saw 'Needful Things' he decided that he was staying far away from it.

But, as Cologne had noted once, the universe seemed to like duality. There, on THIS side of the cul-de-sac, was a name that Cologne had mentioned as "rumored to exist" but not confirmed.

Walking into the store, Ranma couldn't help but gape. He had gone in thinking that someplace with such a strange name had to have something good. It sounded something like an electronics store, so perhaps he could have gotten Kasumi a portable televison with which she could watch her soaps (or whatever she watched) as she did her chores.

But what he never expected to see was what looked to be a bunch of people standing on pedestals, surrounded by plexiglass.

"Well hello there and welcome to Cyberdyne Corporation!" said a cheerful voice over to his side. He turned to see an attractive brunette standing next to him with a smile on her face. "My name is Kumiko. How may I help you?"

"Uhh... I was kinda... looking ta buy a present and... accidentally came in here..," he told her hesitantly.

"Then you came to the right place! Our androids make _wonderful_ gifts!"

"Androids?"

"Robots that can look like people. Some of them are so well made that you can't tell them apart from a real human being!"

"You mean that they're all..," he said, waving at the figures on the pedestals.

Kumiko nodded. "Oh yes. All of these are from our product lines. Most of them are just holograms to show what we can provide, but occasionally we will sell one or two like that."

"'Lines'? Ya got more than one kind?"

"Certainly. They have so many different tasks that it's absurd to just put one out. Take our maids lines for instance," she said as she pulled out a catalog and flipped to a page before showing it to him. "For instance, we have the 'Multi' line who have the _sweetest_ personalities that you can imagine, and try very hard, even if they aren't the best in something. Then there are thier sister line, the 'Serio' models, who are capable of handling the largest dinners, but tend to be all business."

Gazing at the image of the happily smiling 'Multi' and the dour looking 'Serio', he had a hard time imagining that they were not human, even with the big things where their ears should have been. "And ya got even more?"

"Of course. We have Personacoms which are like computers, bodyguard models, entertainment ones, and oh so many more! There are even the Seconds, who don't have much personality, but are tireless workers."

"Umm... I see..."

"In addition, all of them are very affordable. And we have payment plans for even the most strapped budget. So even if you were to order a top of the line, high end model with all the accessories, then we could work some way to make the payments over a period of time, or all together at once."

* * *

_Analysis summary.  
Subject is Human, Male, Age: 16, Racial subpheno: Japanese.  
89% chance that subject is a martial artist.  
Possibility for epic quest/adventures: 20%+  
Manner of speech/dress indicate probability of low financial status. Used OK?_

"Uhm," said Ranma, "can I see one?" How could they make androids that looked just like people? Or mainly like people?

"Certainly," said Kumiko.

Without any apparent signal from a sales rep, a Scottish Terrier entered from some swinging doors in the back and sat down in front of Ranma.

Then the fur of his chest opened up to reveal metal and plastic.

"Robot dogs?!" Ranma asked, a little freaked since he hadn't realized that it was an android prior to the chest-opening.

"Aye, laddie," said the dog in a thick Scottish accent. "I be a Faithful Cybernetic Companion unit. FCC-3147-K9 at yoir service." The chest closed on its own. "Oi, it be a bit drafty with that open."

Ranma blinked as he tried to figure out where the seam had been.

"Most of our units are of a human styling, but from your manner of clothing, we computed an 89% chance that you were a martial artist," said Kumiko. "Analysis of such fare as Samurai Showdown and various series indicates that an animal companion is acceptable. We also have purely mechanical looking Droid units and vehicle chassis - though these tend to stand out a lot more."

"Yeah, well, I'm looking for a gift," said the uncertain Ranma. "I dunno. Isn't this kinda like slavery or something?"

"Not at all," said Kumiko. "While our units are perfectly capable of independent thought and action, being fully capable artificial intelligences, they are androids and not completely human psychologically. They are happiest when they are performing their functions and being useful. The need to belong, along with this need to be useful, are higher priorities for an android than for a biological human."

Ranma had a sudden suspicion. "You're one of 'em?"

Kumiko hesitated but nodded. "I'm a fully functional Protocol unit, and know over 3000 languages."

"I see," said Ranma, thinking that sounded like an awful lot. On the one hand, he couldn't see Ryouga topping a gift like this. On the other hand, Akane might have a fit if he brought a cute girl home - even if it wasn't a real girl and she was a gift for Kasumi.

"What kind of person is the gift for?" Kumiko asked, reading the biosigns and determining that the boy was wrestling with indecision.

"Uhm, well, she's a cook and she keeps the house and stuff and I've seen she reads medical books and stuff, and uhm," Ranma tried to figure out how to describe Kasumi. "She's nice but not all there if ya know what I mean. I mean she'll seem perfectly fine up until she does something like wave 'bye bye' to that dumb phoenix."

_Upping chances of epic quest/adventure to 70%._

"How old is she?" Kumiko asked. "Does she read romance novels? Fantasy? Shojo manga? Any hobbies?"

Ranma scratched his head. "Actually I was looking for a vaccuum cleaner or something when I came in. She'll be twenty with her birthday. Dunno if she reads anything, haven't seen her do it."

"I see," said Kumiko, "well how about this unit?" A hologram of an apparently sleeping android appeared.

* * *

_A certain rooftop_

"What the heck IS that place, anyway?" asked Ranma.

"Cyberdyne is the shortened name of a company from a magitech universe that was started by a god named Hephaestus, or at least one of his apprentices, and which then proceeded with that god's approval. They are essentially as oriented towards redemption and salvation as some shops, like Needful Things, are oriented towards corruption and damnation," said the Raven.

"Selling robot people?" asked Ranma. He preferred doing things himself after all.

"Among other things, yes," said the Raven. "The thing is, like the bad shops, they simply present the choices and opportunities to the buyer. The buyer has to CHOOSE whether to do the right thing or wrong thing. Free Will."

"Oh," said Ranma.

"At this point, things split off further," noted the Raven. "Since there are so many choices you could have made, ALL of which have potential repercussions. Not only because of the unit's capabilities - but people's perceptions of how the unit looks and acts."

"So... people are judging me without actually knowing a thing about me? How is this different from normal?" asked Ranma.

"Actually, it's fairly typical of human existence," noted the Raven.

* * *

_Cyberdyne:_

Kumiko communicated with the store's AI. _This human?_

_Identification complete  
Name: Ranma Saotome, age: 16  
Class: Dedicated Martial Artist, level: 9  
Jusenkyo Curse: Girl, Ailurophobia  
Several other curses. Evidence of brain damage  
Analysis of common Ranma 1/2 timeline indicates intervention occurred within first year, exact time as yet undetermined.  
Recommendation: tentative approval._

"This way, Mister Saotome, we have an ideal unit for you while you're on a budget." Kumiko indicated. "There is a single additional condition."

"What?" Ranma asked, hoping it wasn't too weird.

"The unit is a Sailodroid model, and their first duty is always to defend mankind from supernatural menaces, alien invasions, things like that." Kumiko indicated.

"Alien invasions?" Ranma responded skeptically.

"I know it's difficult to believe in things like magic, curses, ghosts, shapeshifters, ancient evil, and things like that in this modern age, Mister Saotome, but they do exist."

Ranma was about to argue the point when he started considering his life. Maybe alien invasions weren't that much of a stretch.

"They have engram recordings and personalities that duplicate the originals to a high degree. This is the unit," said Kumiko, coming to a stop as a female form stepped forward out of an alcove.

"Hello, my name is Hotaru, SMX06. I hope we can be good friends."

"Uh... I... guess so..," stammered the pigtailed boy. There wasn't anything immediately visible to indicate particularly that this girl was anything other than a young girl of about fourteen. In some kind of figure skating or cheerleader costume. Certainly he'd seen sillier outfits in some fights.

Hotaru smiled. "I'm sure that we'll be great friends then!"

"If ya say so."

"Is there something wrong with that?"

"Not really, but I kinda have strange luck in the friend department."

"Like what?"

"Most people that I meet either want ta beat me, or marry me. Sometimes both."

"Oh my... But I'd never do that!" Hotaru declared that last with as much solemnity as she could muster.

Ranma shrugged. "I guess not, but it ain't like I got a lot of people skills."

"That's okay," reassured the Sailordroid, "I think that you're a very nice person."

"Ya do?"

"Hm-hm," she pronounced with a definate nod.

"That's real nice of ya. Kinda makes me wonder..."

"Why is that?"

"Ya seem ta be a perfectly good... y'know."

"Yes..?"

"Well... Then why ain't ya supposed ta... um... cost more."

"Excuse me?"

"I mean that you're pretty an' nice an' all. So why ain't anyone lookin' ta buy ya?"

Hotaru proved that she was engineered well enough to blush shyly. "Thank you..."

"I can answer that very simply," interjected Kumiko.

"Yeah?" went the pigtailed boy.

Kumiko's expression was somewhat frustrated. "You see, most individuals that purchase female androids tend towards the... more obviously attractive forms, if you know know what I mean."

"Actually... no."

"Let's put it this way. They want girls with pretty faces and..," she trailed off, cupping her hands a bit away from her chest.

"What d'ya... Oh."

"Yes. 'Oh.' Those tend to be gentlemen mainly, and they like to have something to help pretty up the house. But on to business."

"Okay."

"Would you like to make a purchase, or is there anything else that you would like?"

* * *

Ranma wasn't too sure about this, he'd been getting a present for Kasumi after all. Instead he'd ended up with some fourteen year old girl. At least she'd changed into normal-looking clothes for the trip. Less attention that way.

Hotaru walked alongside him, looking around as if everything were new to her. In a sense it was.

"So, uhm, how are you supposed to defend anyone? Do ya know some martial arts or something?" Ranma finally asked.

"No. I could learn, I suppose," said Hotaru. "I have pretty good strength and speed, a nanomachine repair system, special optics and sensors, and a set of powerup protocols - but those are locked until actually needed."

Ranma thought about that. "Do ya want to learn martial arts then?"

Hotaru nodded cutely. "Unnn. Sure, sensei!"

Ranma tried not to smile. "Sensei" eh? Well, why not? His father and Mister Tendo were so hot on him taking over the School and Dojo - might as well find out if he actually enjoyed teaching. "Okay, well, don't forget you're Kasumi's birthday present. Speakin' of which, what kinda skills you got to help her out with?"

"I've got some medical programming, the equivelant of an RN (Registered Nurse), but other than that I can learn," said Hotaru. "So is this Kasumi nice?"

"Yeah, pretty much. A little out of it at times though." Ranma gestured at the gate. "Well, we're here."

"Oh!" Hotaru said. "That's strange. 'To challenge owner in savage combat use rear entry'?"

"Yah," said Ranma, holding the door open for the little girl. "Say what's with the stick, anyway?"

"It's part of me, sort of," said Hotaru, smiling at some short haired girl as Ranma led her inside. The girl simply stared.

"Uhm, Kasumi!" Ranma said as he entered the kitchen. "I gotcha a birthday present."

"Oh really," Kasumi said, turning from the pots on the stove. "Oh my. Is this another fiancee?"

Two girls had followed Ranma and Hotaru into the kitchen, one of whom was now glowering.

"Nah. My first student, and she's your birthday present. Hotaru, this is Kasumi. Kasumi, this is Hotaru." Ranma scratched his head. Was there a proper way to introduce a girl to her birthday present?

"Hello, Mistress Kasumi. My name is Hotaru SMX-006. I am a Sailodroid unit. My primary duty is planetary defense but unless there's a supernatural menace to defend against, I'm here to help you."

Dead silence.

"There's going to be a good story involved in this," said Nabiki.

"Ranma, you pervert! You bought a girl! You, you, you SLAVETRADER!" Akane declared.

"L...l...listen! I can explain!" stammered the pigtailed boy.

"Explain WHAT?!" barked Akane, "You bought a girl!"

"Well... yeah... sort of..."

"HOW COULD YOU..."

Her demand was cut short as a small blur bounced into the room. "Ranma, you bought a girl?" asked Happosai.

"Sort of..."

"That's my boy! Now let me see how the merchandise feels..."

"Huh?" went Hotaru as she felt something latch onto her chest.

"That's odd, there's no chi..," commented the aged pervert.

At the same time, Hotaru was going through a programmed checklist.

*Unknown assailant detected.  
*Possible Human: Negative.  
*Method of attack: Energy drain.  
*Threat Index: 65.43%  
*Perversion Factor: 99.78%  
*Most Likely Origin: Evil Empire  
*Course Of Action: Eliminate with Extreme Pleasure  
*COUNTERMEASURES ACTIVATE*

All the warning that Happi got was a flash of light followed by another, and then he was getting a satellite's eye view of the city.

* * *

To Happosai, all he knew was that he was now gaining altitude faster than the space shuttle and undergoing g-forces that were making the edges of his vision pull into this gray wispiness.

Hotaru was busy reacting and acting.

Everyone else saw the whole thing from a somewhat different perspective.

Nabiki saw the least, one second Happosai was groping the kid. The next, there was a flash and wind blowing past her and when she opened her eyes Happosai was gone and the girl had changed clothes.

Ranma saw the most, as noticing details occurring at high speed was a fundamental part of his martial arts.

00:00:01: Happosai commenting that there was no chi as he groped.  
00:00:02: Hotaru glowing. Not all that unusual in Nerima.  
00:00:03: Hotaru surrounded by something like lightning that forced Happosai off her chest.  
00:00:04: Hotaru's clothes being replaced by something that looked like a figure skating costume as her little baton became a full sized polearm.  
00:00:05: Hotaru's outstretched hand firing a pulse of energy that accelerated Happosai further into the evening sky.  
00:00:06: Hotaru holding the polearm as lines of light appeared around her and moved in regular patterns.

Ranma gaped momentarily. An escape technique that caused damage? A change-clothes-instantly technique? A blast-annoyance-away technique? Oh, he was SO learning those. "Hotaru?"

"Vampiric entity removed from premises," said Hotaru in reply. "Scanning immediate environment for secondary targets."

"'Vampiric'?" Ranma repeated. "Like a vampire? Oh yeah! That bit where he gropes a gal and gets chi from it. Gotcha."

"Negative detection of secondary targets," said Hotaru as she walked out into the backyard. "However the primary target is still alive. Preparing to eliminate." Crackling discharges began to build up around her and her glaive, purple to blue-white in coloration.

"Hotaru, don't kill him," said Ranma. "He's more annoying than evil. Well, most of the time."

"Oh," said Hotaru, filing that away as she cancelled the target & fire order.

The various girls watched as Hotaru shifted and was once again wearing normal street clothes and carrying a baton. When steam vents popped out on her upper arms and discharged, it raised a few eyebrows.

"Hmmm," Ranma hmmmed. He wondered if he could learn or emulate that attack. Looked handy but if you had to wear that outfit, he'd settle for finding a defense.

"You're really an android?" Nabiki asked. "Saotome's not just full of it as usual?"

"Hey!" Ranma protested.

"I am, though in many ways I am indistinguishable from an organically born human," explained Hotaru. "I'm based on the organic, akashic, and neural patterns of a girl named Hotaru Tomoe. I hope we can all be good friends!"

Kasumi smiled. "I hope so too. My goodness, Ranma, you've certainly gotten me an unusual present."

Hotaru smiled extra brightly. "Ranma's also going to teach me some martial arts! Isn't that nice?"

"How wonderful!" declared Genma as he popped up, apparently out of nowhere..

"It is such a wonderous day Saotome!" agreed Soun.

The portly martial artist put on a puffed out exterior. "The Master has been sent far away from our prescence."

"That he has..."

"May he never come back again!"

"Um..," began Hotaru. "But did you say that he was your Master?"

"That is unfortunately the truth..."

"Then why aren't you mad?"

"Mad? Why should we be? This is a cause for celebration! The Master has been blasted away!"

"Right, you are old friend," agreed Soun with happy tears streaming down his face, "We are free from him!"

"Break out the sake! Tonight we shall drink long into the night!"

"You don't mind me then?" asked Hotaru.

"Mind? You have freed us from a great and dark suffering!"

"But he's still alive..."

"That is unfortunate, but we will have to deal with it when he returns then. But for now, we do not have to worry about him until that happens. Even then, we will have you here to keep him under control!"

"We must make the most of this moment," intoned the Tendo patriarch.

"Yes, let's! I'm sure that this calls for the _special_ stash of sake!"

"Right you are, old friend..."

"No more will an individual be sucked clean of their energy."

"Certainly. With this girl here, we can prevent them from getting anyone ever again!"

* * *

Somewhere grading papers, Hinako got a sudden feeling of dread.

* * *

The two fathers walked away, heading for what sounded to be another night drunk. Their children could only watch as the two headed away, saying things about their 'good fortune' or something like that.

Nabiki stared as once again her calm logical worldview had sprung leaks.

There was no such thing as magic. Never mind such things as Jusenkyo curses, ghost cats, possessing spirit dolls, evil oni, etc.

Now she was viewing technology several orders ahead of what you could get from Radio Shack.

"You're an android? A robot? A machine?" Nabiki looked over the young girl who had just exchanged the skating outfit for a nice black turtleneck and pair of black jeans.

"Yes, sort of. The term used by my manufacturer is Sailordroid, though Marionette is also used." Hotaru looked mainly uncomfortable under the scrutiny. "Though Artificial Person is also quite frequently used. As I said earlier, I'm based on a real person and a 99% accurate simulation in many respects."

Nabiki's eyes glittered. Take this girl apart and she could sell the secrets of her manufacture for a tidy sum. Never mind the usual penny ante stuff, this was the big time!

Akane scowled. She wasn't concerned with how pretty this girl was, or that she seemed to be fairly powerful. Not at all! She was merely get mad because Ranma was now a slavetrader and buying GIRLS! If this didn't count as perverted, what did?

Hotaru took a deep breath and faced Kasumi. "Well, Miss Tendo. My main skill set is medical. I'm the equivelant of a Registered Nurse and other than that I pick up new skills quite quickly."

Nabiki considered and discarded several plans before deciding on her course of action.

Nabiki went back to her source material at the library, reading quickly through old comics. Ah, just the thing.

* * *

"Waxing the floor?" Nabiki asked as he noticed the girl busy at said task.

"Yes, Kasumi-sama is working out things for me to do around here," said Hotaru cheerfully.

_Clank!_

Nabiki stood back. Just like in that old comic book, slap a large magnet on her back and she went stiff.

"Nabiki-san," Hotaru said, reaching around and pulling the magnet off. "I really appreciate you wanting to play games, but I'm a little busy right now."

"Oh right, I can see that," said Nabiki, crossing magnets off the list. What else would work?

* * *

Nabiki headed into the kitchen and beheld a strange sight. There was Kasumi and Hotaru, wearing identical aprons and chopping up vegetables.

"Dinner isn't ready yet," began Hotaru.

Nabiki whipped out her secret weapon, pointed it, and pressed the button.

"I did make some cookies with Kasumi-sama's help," said Hotaru holding out a tray. "Oh dear. What's that for?"

Nabiki frowned momentarily as the "Universal Remote" proved to have no effect on androids. "Oh nothing." _Well, scratch __that__ plan._

"Don't spoil your appetite too much, Nabiki," chided Kasumi. "Hotaru-chan is being a big help and we'll have a celebretory dinner tonight."

Nabiki took one of the cookies and bit into it as she tried to think of ways that... "Kasumi, did you make this?"

"No, Nabiki, it was mainly Hotaru," Kasumi responded.

"Oh, you're far too modest, Kasumi-sama," said Hotaru.

"Now now, Hotaru."

"Sorry. I meant Kasumi-sensei!"

Kasumi nodded and returned to the chopping, followed after a moment by her younger shadow.

Nabiki retired to her room, trying to find other ways of separating the machine from her secrets. How else did they stop robots in those stories?

* * *

It was the perfect plan as far as Nabiki could see. The robot girl would be completely oblivious to the world during her recharge state. When that happened, she would be able to stomp up to her if she wanted, and not be noticed. So, she would be safe when she went and turned off the little machine. Doing so would let her pull apart all the little bits of the robot so that she could get at all the juicy secrets that she held.

Helpfully, Kasumi left Hotaru in her room with the lights off. Nabiki waited for a time when it seemed that all was quiet and clear, and snuck down the hall from her room to Kasumi's. She slid the door open, and saw the slight feminine form sitting on a chair with her eyes closed. The middle Tendo snuck up to the still android, and waved her hand in front of her face to no reaction.

With a slight smirk, Nabiki began looking around on the robot's body to see if she could find the 'OFF' switch. There didn't seem to be any that she could see, but that was only to be expected. It wouldn't do to have just anyone come over and turn off the machine after all.

Kneeling next to her chair, she set about the next step of her plan. If the switch was not some place that someone could see, it would have to be some place that it wasn't. So, she took her hands and ran them along the non-moving form, trying to discover any bumps or lumps that could be a switch. Finding that there were no apparent ones, she bit her lip and put her hand under the android's blouse. Then feeling along what had the warmth and texture of human skin, she went along trying to find what she was looking for.

"NABIKI?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" screeched her younger sister from the doorway.

"Akane..?!"

"What's going on?!"

"I... was... uh..."

"I come up here to get something from the closet for Kasumi, and I find you doing... THIS!"

"It's... not what you think..."

"You've got you hand up her shirt!"

"Well... not exactly what you think..."

"You're ADMITTING IT?!"

"Uh... no..."

"Look at you! You even have your other hand at the hem of her skirt!"

"There's a perfectly good reason for this..."

"Yeah, there is!"

"Glad to see that you understand little sister..."

"Sure I understand! I understand that you're a PERVERT!"

"EH?!"

"I mean, only a real pervert would go and feel up someone when they're sleeping!"

"Hey, I'm not..."

"Don't deny it! I only have to look at it to see that you're just a big pervert as RANMA IS!"

"You can't think..."

"He BUYS a GIRL and brings her home, and you FEEL HER UP!"

"Oh my! Nabiki, that isn't proper at all!" As this was taking place in Kasumi's bedroom, it was inevitable that Kasumi would show up.

"Oh dear, I don't think this is proper at all." The same went for a certain android superheroine.

Nabiki frowned. "This isn't what you think!"

"Sister, would you please take your hands off me?" Hotaru asked.

"She 'sister'?" Akane looked even more upset. "What kind of sick role playing games are you up to, Nabiki?!" An odd expression played over Akane's face and she hurried down the hall.

"It isn't like that, erp!" Nabiki looked down at where her wrists were now encircled by the small soft and really darn strong hands of the android in question.

"I'm really not interested in exploring certain avenues of human existence," insisted Hotaru as she forcibly removed Nabiki's hands.

"But..."

"What's going on here?!" Soun demanded as he and Genma looked in.

"Well," began Kasumi, who had pulled this maneuver once before while explaining Shampoo to her father so it shouldn't be a surprise that she made the same sort of misinterpretations as previously. "It looks like Nabiki was jealous of my relationship with Hotaru and decided to come in here and get her or get off or something."

"Gurk!" said Genma, looking stunned.

"That's not quite it," said Nabiki, trying to remain calm and regain control of the situation.

"AH HAH!" Akane said, tossing a few items and magazines into the room. "So that is why you keep borrowing my clothes and my underwear! Just look at these pictures!"

"Oh dear," said Nabiki, wincing. "There's a very good explanation for this. I've been selling those pictures at the school..." Brain caught up and told Mouth that this wouldn't help matters any.

Akane's eyes were wide. Her mouth opened and closed without making a noise and she turned pale. While Akane normally could leap to a wrong conclusion quite easily, or avoid making connections (such as P-chan and Ryouga) that she didn't want to, there were times she could take a few nagging details and come to an absolutely correct conclusion.

Pictures that were a few months old of herself - naked. Her sister had been selling them at school. Call it Evidence A. Nabiki making money off the bets from how fast Akane would finish her morning fights. Call it Evidence B. Nabiki's frequent business dealings with Kuno. That would be circumstancial but Evidence C nonetheless. A+B+C = "it was you..."

Ranma came up and was about to ask what the hey was going on but somehow the glowing battleaura forming around Akane clued him in that remaining quiet and unnoticed was probably a good thing.

"Excuse me? Moi?" Nabiki was discovering what it was like to be one page behind in the script and not liking it at all. "As I was saying, there's a perfectly logical explanation for this."

"YOU started Kuno on that whole 'beat Akane to date her' stupidity so you could make more money!" Akane stared as the awful conclusion shook her world. It made sense though, and that picture with her in the long hair snoozing in the tub had to date from about the time of the challenge. "You're responsible for that... that..."

"Uhm," Ranma couldn't keep quiet anymore. He really wanted to know what was going on and hope it wasn't something he did.

Akane still wasn't sure about the whole slavetrader thing (she was still wrestling with the concept of friendly big hearted androids), but responded by holding onto Ranma and crying into his chest in a sudden manuever that absolutely nobody there had expected. Least of all Ranma. "Ranma! My sister's a bigger pervert than Happosai!"

"Huh?!" Ranma asked, now completely lost.

"Hey!" Nabiki exclaimed.

"Oh dear, oh my!" Kasumi said, fretting and wondering if pictures of HER had been sold to a bunch of teenage boys. How thoroughly improper!

"Don't worry, Kasumi-sensei," said Hotaru, getting in between the two sisters. "I'll protect you!"

Soun sniffled and began to bawl something unintelligible about the Master's evil influence.

Hotaru wasn't too sure about what was going on. First she woke up with Nabiki's hand's up her shirt, which was obviously disconcerting. Then everyone had come barging in and started yelling something about pictures, challenges and someone named Kuno. It seemed like the middle Tendo had been doing something bad, but she wasn't too clear on what. What she did know was that Nabiki had apparently done something that Akane hadn't liked, with money involved somewhere in it.

But seeing as she wasn't clear on what the deal was, she made her decision based on her programming.

_System Rule 2: When there are no threats of invasion/attack/incursion by hostile enemy forces, the safety of the unit's owner is of upmost priority_

Since she was in a room full of martial artists, and Kasumi was definately not a fighter, then the only choice was to position herself accordingly. Which didn't help her understanding any.

"Listen, I'm sure that I can explain everything!" declared Nabiki.

"That's good," commented Ranma, "'Cause I'm kinda lost here."

"Those pictures had nothing to do with getting him interested in Akane. I swear it!"

"Pictures? Kinda like the ones that you sold of my girl-side?"

"Well yeah, but..."

"Or the napkins and other stuff?"

"Those were for business reasons only!"

"Napkins with my picture on 'em were only for business?"

"Yes. And they sold really well too."

"But isn't that pornography?" asked Genma.

"What?!"

"You are selling pictures of naked girls, aren't you?"

"Don't worry," put in Hotaru, "I'm sure that you are still a nice girl, even if you've chosen a nasty profession."

"But I didn't! That was only an opportunity and Kuno took it!" blurted the middle Tendo.

"You're always talkin' ta him, and offerin' him stuff," observed Ranma.

"That's because he's a special case!"

Soun frowned. "Daughter, is there something that we should talk about?"

"What do you mean?"

"Exactly how is this Kuno boy special?"

"What?! Him?!"

"Well, you seem to have a particular relationship with him..."

"Because he's a patsy! A fool! I'd rather go out with... RANMA then him!"

"You wanna... go out with me?" asked a puzzled pigtailed boy, remembering a time when Nabiki had tricked her way into being his fiancee.

"Oh my," went Kasumi, "Do you like both boys and girls then?"

Which set off another case of bawling from Akane, and a confused look from Ranma.

"ARGH!" growled Nabiki.

A certain little black pig trotted up to find out what all the commotion was. When he got there (after trips to the dojo and Bozeman, Montana), he saw Akane getting (sort of) comforted by Ranma, among a whole lot of people around Kasumi's door.

"Okay everyone listen very closely," inisisted Nabiki, "I have an explination for all this."

"Tell us then..," complained Ranma.

"I'm getting to it. The pictures I gave Kuno were only a business transaction..."

Sobs came from Akane.

"And he was going to go after her anyway..."

Then came the tears...

"Then he gave me a ready made fan base..."

Which was followed by her shoulders shaking.

"How could my own sister do this to me?!"

P-chan took one look at what was going on and realized that whatever was going on, it was making Akane cry. That meant that Ranma had something to do with it. But he was the one that she had turned to for comfort, and she wouldn't have done it if he was the one who had hurt her. (Though the little piglet thought that it should have been _him_ that she turned to.) However, her words started the cogs working in his head.

"It was just business Akane," protested the mercenary Tendo, "It didn't mean anything to me."

'She hurt Akane?' thought P-chan.

"How could you say that?" sobbed the youngest Tendo.

'She did! She did!'

"You still don't get it!" Nabiki insisted.

Ranma would agree with her, but the front of his shirt was getting soaked from Akane bawling into it and in his mind two strange concepts had come to roost:  
_A) Something had gone wrong.  
_B) He wasn't being blamed for it.  
So Ranma fought down the urge to say something about how confused he was by the whole situation and just clumsily patted Akane on the back and wondered if women would ever make sense to him.

P-chan was lying in a daze. Akane was crying. Akane was being comforted by Ranma. Nabiki was acting like she'd pulled a Ranma. Akane was crying and it wasn't Ranma's fault. But something had gone wrong and therefore it WAS Ranma's fault but it clearly wasn't which meant...

Oddly enough this was the very effect Nabiki had tried to produce on Hotaru with a few logic puzzles earlier.

"It's not my fault!" Nabiki exclaimed. "I'm just trying to turn off the robot and take her apart so I can sell the pieces to..."

Akane began bawling (again)into Ranma's shirt. Terms that seemed to involve the lack of a soul or heart seemed to escape from that grip.

"NABIKI?!" Kasumi gasped. "You're that jealous of Hotaru?"

_sniffle_ Hotaru's eyes teared up at this evidence that the big sister she'd hugged earlier in the day HATED her that much.

"How much money... never mind," said Genma as Glares Of Doom were briefly turned in his direction.

Nabiki flinched. Now the machine was crying. Waitaminute, machines can't cry. Right? Think about it later. "It's just business. Business!"

"WAAAAAAA!" The forecast for the Tendo Dojo includes a flash flood advisory. Soun wasn't sure if Nabiki was a lolicon-fixated lesbian, a murderous mercenary who might chop up family members to sell organs, or merely a Yakuza wannabe trafficking in pornographic pictures of his other daughters. From where he was looking, it was all bad.

Nabiki was about to comment further when she noticed blue scan lines running up and down her body. She slowly and with great apprehension turned back towards the android in question.

Marionette Saturn held her glaive ready as she finished scanning. "Subject: Nabiki Tendo. Analysis: No evidence of possession or youma control. Dark taint possible but outside my ability to detect."

Nabiki was just letting out a relieved breath when her father interrupted.

"It is late. We will discuss this in the morning." Soun went back to his room.

Everyone else was nervous of a sudden. The emotional outburst had suddenly sealed itself and Soun had shown the stoicism and self control of a true samurai. That was scary!

* * *

Coming down for breakfast that morning, Nabiki noticed that things were still quite a bit tense. Her "Good Morning" was only answered by a "Hey" from Ranma, and a "Morning" from Genma. Akane decidely ignored her while sidling closer to her fiance. Hotaru seemed to shrink from her. Soun's regular newspaper was not in evidence, replaced by a scowl as he mechanically ate his meal. Which happened to be rather plain, especially by 'Kasumi' standards.

Who by the way, was only getting to the table herself. "I've spoken to him father."

"And..?" asked Soun.

"Mr. Saneda says that we will have to fill out quite a bit of paperwork to make it, but he feels that it is possible."

"What does he mean for us to do in the mean time?"

"He wants us to have Nabiki continue to go to Furinkan until such time as everything can be readied for her transfer to the new school."

The middle Tendo choked on her rice. "WHAT?!"

"Father wants us to send you to a school where special care is given to 'problem children'."

"I don't need to go to that sort of place!"

Her father's scowl deepened. "You have shown yourself to be a disgrace to your family."

"What..."

"You have sold pornographic pictures of your sister and her fiancee."

"That was business!"

"You tried to dismember a memeber of this family so that you could sell her parts."

"I was only trying to take advantage of an opportunity!"

"You groped a young girl while we were sleeping."

"That was only to find her off button!"

Slapping his hand down onto the table, Soun glared at her. "There will be _NO_ discussion on this! You _will_ have to take what your actions have given you, and not dishonor yourself any further!"

"But..."

"I said that's final! I am only happy that your poor mother has not had to see how you've fallen."

A pall fell onto those at the table, and no one thought to break it.

"Someone pass the miso." No one, save Genma that was.

Akane got up from her seat and picked up her bag. "I'm going to school. You coming Ranma?"

The pigtailed boy looked from his bowl to his fiancee, and began to protest, but then decided against it. "Uh... sure."

As the two of them left, Soun looked to his old friend. "I seem to have lost my appetite. Care for a game of shogi, Genma?"

"But I haven't finished my meal..," complained the portly martial artist.

"I'm sure that Kasumi can wrap it up for later," the Tendo Patriarch told him cooly.

"But... I see your point. Just let me get cleaned up."

"Oh my," commented Kasumi as she got up, "I have so much to do to get ready for those papers."

"I'll help you Kasumi-sempai," offered Hotaru.

"Thank you," the eldest Tendo daughter replied, and the four of them departed to do their own things.

Leaving Nabiki in the remains of the family breakfast.

* * *

Nabiki was a little shocked at the events of the morning.

Okay, she was a lot shocked.

She'd just talk to Kasumi and straighten this all out. Right? Right!

As she was approaching the kitchen, Nabiki heard voices and automatically started eavesdropping.

"Oh Hotaru. I failed to raise them. It's all my fault. I couldn't take over mother's duties..."

"It's not your fault, Kasumi-sempai! You were young yourself! You did the best you could and I'm sure that if you hadn't taken over things would have been a lot worse!"

"Thank you, Hotaru, but Akane's such a violent maniac and now Nabiki is competing against the Yakuza."

Nabiki winced. She was just a businesswoman. That's all. Everyone was just overreacting! It was a lot funnier when they did that to Ranma.

"Well, if she is, then this will be just the thing for her, won't it? What kind of school does Mr. Saneda run?"

"Oh, the kind? Fortunately, I remembered one of my old classmates had said something about this school. I explained the situation earlier on the phone while you were hanging the wash and Mr Saneda said that they had an opening available right now. It's a very special military-style academy."

"That sounds interesting," offered Hotaru.

"He made it seem so. I mean, waking up before dawn means that she can see the beauty of the sunrise!"

'But I don't want to see the sunrise!' thought Nabiki with a whimper.

"And then they get to take a nice run up mountains, over rocks and make their own trails! They even get to wade through some cool brooks and streams."

'Two miles of mud, bugs and sore feet?'

"Then comes a nice communal meals of ready made, nutritionally balanced foods..."

'Institutional slop.'

"They have a day ready for her with plenty of intense eduactional lessons combined with a strict execise regimen to make her nice and healthy."

'Torture sessions...'

"And they give plenty of assignments to help each of the students occupied for a lot of time."

'Busy work?'

"It sounds rather nice..," commented Hotaru.

"From what Mr. Saneda tells me, it is," Kasumi told her, "They even try to have their instructors give each of their students very personal attention. They are mostly retired military officers and such, you know. They are even some former American Marines on staff."

'Drill sergeants?' ran through Nabiki's head.

"They even give the students haircuts and nice uniforms when they get there."

One of the middle Tendo daughter's hands reached up and felt the locks that she had spent so much time caring for, as she imagined them falling to the floor in clumps as they were shaved off.

"But what if someone does something bad anyway?" asked Hotaru.

"Mister Saneda said that they have ways of making sure they don't. But if they do manage it, he said that those students start off with things like having having to cleaning the latrines, to a special program intensive program that has the teachers watching them from waking up to going to sleep."

"That's tough..."

"He said that it would be... Now, let me see... Where did I put Nabiki's medical papers..."

"I'll help you look!"

"Thank you."

"No problem."

Slumping against the wall as they left, Nabiki thought about this place that her family was planning on sending her. They were going to send her somewhere that the most exiting thing to do would be to run some insane obstacle course. She exercised her brain, not her muscles and wasn't one to run around the ward all day. That was for others, like Akane, and she was _not_ a morning person.

There was no other choice. She just had to find some way of getting out of this mess. In no way was she at all ready to be sent off to some glorified boot camp. She'd just figure out some angle and not only keep herself from getting shipped off, but to regain the comfortable position that she'd had before all this mess.

As far as she was concerned, there was no way that she could fail.

Thus perked up, she went and started to look for some way of accomplishing her goal.

* * *

Akane had wrestled all day with the decision.

Well, at least up until lunch. "Ranma. Show me this place you got Hotaru from as soon as school's over."

"Uh oh," said Ranma, looking as if disaster were about to hit. Some unspeakable horror from beyond the grave.

Akane, knowing Ranma at least a little bit by now, started looking to see if Kodachi had shown up with a basket of kittens. "What is it?"

"You were in such a hurry to leave, we didn't grab lunch," said Ranma, going from horrified to sulking.

Ukyo overheard this last bit and was about to suggest some nice okonomiyaki (made by the greatest okonomiyaki chef in all Japan - naturally) when something came rocketing out of the sky to make a considerable impact on the ground outside.

"Akane! Ranma! I brought your lunches!"

Ukyo frowned. A newcomer + female + extremely cute + some sort of martial artist = another fiancee?! "HEY!"

As Ukyo passed the stairs after the running Ranma (and slower moving Akane), someone stuck her head out a classroom door. "Battleaura? It must be... a delinquent!"

Ukyo passed Akane and was gaining on Ranma when the youth of the new girl registered. If she was a new fiancee then there wasn't an immediate problem - the girl looked all of fourteen at most!

"Thanks, Hotaru! That's great! You make this?" Ranma accepted his lunch with all the reverence of a holy artifact.

"Unnn," said Hotaru with a nod. "Kasumi-sempai helped me, Ranma-sensei! Will you have a chance to teach me some martial arts today?"

"Probably after supper," responded Ranma. "Akane wants to see that Cyberdyne place."

"Eeek! Miss Hinako, that's really not a good idea!"

Everyone naturally looked to where Akane was trying to dissuade chibi-Hinako from brandishing her coin. "That girl's a delinquent!"

Hotaru blinked as she stepped from behind the girl with the large spatula to get a clear view. Akane-chan's energy levels were dropping?

*Scanning.  
Energy Drain effect in place, area effect cone centered on coin.  
Subject is child, positive for signs of physical transformation.  
Initial Identification: Energy Harvester Youma.  
Activating Countermeasures.*

With a crackle of energy, Hotaru's clothes transformed and Sailor systems came online.

* * *

Sailordroid Saturn had been created for the purpose of defending the Earth from alien menaces, monster attacks and the occasional evil genius plan. Her designers had kept in mind the fact that their own lives might be in danger if this marionette were to fail. Which would be an unacceptable outcome to them, seeing as they valued their skin too much to allow that to happen. So, they made various design decisions based on theoretical models of what could happen.

Such as having an enemy that can absorb certain attacks and use that energy back at the unit. That made them realize that a power system that the enemy couldn't use would be best for them to give their mechanical defender.

All of which Hinako did not know. What she did was that there was a possible delinquent in the area, and as such she should be punished. Having decided that this meant that she had a matter of immediate importance, she had gone to deal with the delinquent, stopping only to absorb the energy that Miss Tendo was giving out while she was attempting to interfere with a teacher doing her duty.

Finally facing the unnamed girl, she pulled out a coin as soon as she noticed that the girl had energy crackling around her. That meant that she was going to do something naughty and that couldn't be allowed. Taking her coin, Hinako called out "Happo Five-Yen Satsu!" and got... nothing?

That could not be right. But no matter, she had already gotten enough energy earlier to transform to her older form. With that form came the energy to teach this delinquent how to behave.

Unfortunately for her, Saturn was way ahead of her, and her programming had already come up with the information to make her decision.

*Threat Assessement: Attack Imminent  
Enemy Distance To Bystanders: 1.32m at closest  
Course Of Action: Controlled blast to incapacitate Enemy*

Since this only took a mere second, no one realized what was happening until Hotaru swung her weapon in an arc, sending a wave of energy streaking towards Miss Hinako before the teacher could ready her own strike. It hit her straight on, and the momentum from the attack sent the currently adult educator flying backwards until she had hit the fences at the end of the field. There she lay slumped and definately unconscious where her body had dented the metal into a bowl shape.

"Threat has been temporarily neutralized," pronounced Saturn.

Ranma tugged at his pigtail. "Uh... Hotaru?"

"Yes?"

"That was... sorta... my teacher."

"She was? It must be terrible for you to have her possessed like that."

"Umm... She wasn't possessed or nothin'. Least as far as I know."

"What?"

"She's... you know that freak that you blasted yesterday?"

"The one that atacked me?"

"Yeah, him. Ya see, he sorta met her while she was sick in the hospital when he was gettin' chased by some nurses or somethin'. So he used some special pressure points ta help him out. And now she's sorta stuck as a kid, unless she gets someone's battle aura and get ta be an adult again. 'Cept that she only uses it when she thinks that someone's doin' somethin' wrong."

"Oohh... So this is a case of an innocent being unwillingly transformed by an enemy force for nefarious purposes!"

"Uh... I guess..."

"Then that youma I blasted yesterday must be some kind of evil..."

"Nah... well, maybe a bit. But mostly he's just a really big pervert."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"Good... Uh..."

"What?"

"This is going to be such a mess. Gah! Akane!"

"Akane-san will be alright, won't she?"

"Yeah, she'll be fine. It only takes the energy ya let out, so give her enough rest and she'll be fine again."

"Oh... Okay."

"Just help me get her up so we can take her to the nurse's office."

"Sure!"

* * *

She waited until Akane was resting comfortably before voicing her concerns. "Ranchan?"

"Huh?"

"Who's that girl?"

"Oh, Hotaru? That's Hotaru. I bought her for Kasumi's birthday. Ya want me to introduce you?"

Ukyo blinked at the thought of being introduced to a birthday present. "What exactly is she?"

"An android," said Ranma, gesturing to Hotaru. He quickly introduced the two after Hotaru had put a cold cloth across Akane's forehead.

"Quite an attack you got there," said Ukyo as she attempted to gauge the power level of the little girl.

"That? That was nothing," said Hotaru with a shrug and depreciating smile. "That was less than 1/1000th of my potential full power output. Fortunately it wasn't necessary to use that."

"So your full power blast woulda smashed the school?" Ranma nodded. "Yeah, it may not be much of a school. Especially with that principal. Still it's better than some."

Ukyo suddenly felt, for the first time in her life, that a spatula was a wholly inadequate weapon.

"Akane wants to go after school," said Ranma, "to go check out Cyberdyne. Maybe she wants one herself?"

"Mind if I come along?" Ukyo asked after a minute.

* * *

Cologne had spent 300 years of life, mainly in an isolated Chinese village, mainly concerned with the martial arts.

High technology was not something she particularly understood.

She had felt an odd disturbance twice now, and watched from a distance a new player on the scene.

Finally she felt the need to get closer and was surprised to find blue lines of light, apparently emitted from the girl's eyes, moving briefly over her.

"Scan complete. Human female. No evidence of dark taint," said the girl, who then bowed. "Hello."

"Hello," said Cologne in return, dropping out of the tree where she _thought_ she had been concealed. "You don't have any chi, child, would you happen to know why?"

"Because I am a planetary defense unit, an artificial person, auntie," said Hotaru, bowing again and using the term she'd observed used for respected elderly women.

"Planetary defense?" Cologne inquired, wondering what the girl meant by artificial. Perhaps she was one of those born from some fertility process in a hospital?

"Yes. My owner is Kasumi Tendo. My name is Hotaru. I am sorry I cannot stay to chat, but I must get back to my owner."

Cologne wondered about Kasumi Tendo owning slaves. Well, the Japanese had some odd customs but still. "Do you mind if I come with you? I think I'd like to hear more of this."

* * *

As Cologne and Hotaru walked from the front door to the gates of Furinkan, the noise about what had happened had gone down to fierce whispers. Instead of the shock that had gripped the school at the sight of Hinako being sent flying, things had settled to the normal level for a major event at the high school.

That meant that the Furinkan rumor mill was at full swing. The stories went from 'Ranma's got a new martial artist fiancee' to 'She's some kind of magical girl' to 'She was a secret government experiment in espers'. There was even one boy who had declared that she was the 'love of my life'.

Oddly enough, that was _not_ Tatewakei Kuno. _He_ was even now so shocked by what he had witnessed that he was _still_ speechless. (Which some thanked her very much for.)

Unfortunately, that silence did not include his father. A teacher, attacked on his watch? No chance of allowing that to go unpunished!

"Hey kekkei! De big boss man is goin' ta teach you not to go push de teachers around!" declared the Hawaiian fetishist, er macademia nut of Furinkan High as he rushed toward the departing pair.

"Oh bother, not this fool," muttered Cologne as she realized what he was up to.

Too bad for him, Hotaru had been programed for similar situations.

*Scanning.  
No enemy force detected.  
Subject is adult, negative on any known alien indexes. Possible Mind Control  
Initial Identification: Human (Possible Mutation) Intent On Assault.  
Activating Appropriate Countermeasures*

This time, she didn't bother with an energy blast as this did not seem to be in any need of it.

_*WHAM!*_

The not at all stable headmaster met strength engineered for combating evil monsters and the headmaster lost. As well did the tree that he slammed into face first.

"I'll have to ask Ranma-sensei if I did that right," commented Hotaru.

"Trust me child," Cologne assured her, "you did."

"Great!"

Those in the school watched the two of them leave and began to mutter to each other. That girl had been able to not only bash the chi vampire teacher, but the looney headmaster as well!

Which lead one boy to declare that she was really a 'spirit of vengence out to save the poor students from the horrors of evil educators.' (He was not Kuno as well, but did demonstrate that the swordsman was not the only babbling idiot in the school.)

However, Hotaru did not know of this as she walked with Cologne to the Tendo home.

* * *

Ranma was the first to enter, quickly followed by the other two.

Akane and Ukyo stared, their experience with Hotaru preparing them and aware more than Ranma had been of what they were looking at.

The lifelike mannequins in uniforms ranging from paramilitary to the crisp whites of a nurse.

The dogs in the back that could have been from some dog show, except that the two Japanese girls knew quite well that they lacked pedigrees.

The happily beeping automated vaccuum cleaner as it declared war on dust bunnies and attacked dirt and grime with singleminded determination.

"These are all androids?" Akane asked.

"Yes, indeed they are, Miss Tendo is it?" The clerk looked up at the ceiling. "I'm sorry. Did I startle you?"

"Not at all," Akane assured the store clerk from where she was clinging to a light fixture. "I'm just checking from a different vantage point."

Ukyo slowly put her spatula away, not willing to admit she'd been startled either.

"So, ah," said Akane, dropping to the floor. "She seems pretty real..."

"Yes, the original Hotaru was pretty adamant about the conditions in which she could be reproduced, and a faithful duplication was one such condition," admitted the clerk.

"I see," said Akane, who didn't really understand such a strange comment but felt that some sort of reply was required. "Don't you think there's something wrong about selling people?"

"Why?" The clerk cocked her head and regarded Akane briefly. "It's wrong to sell or own human beings, of course. Human psychology and history paint a poor picture of such practices, though there are individuals who might argue otherwise. I've heard the same argument made regarding animals kept as pets and it didn't make any sense to me either. It's not as if you're taking a creature perfectly suited to survive in an environment into another environment where it is unable to adapt. In the case of our products, your purchase of a model allows for other models to be built and researched. The contracts involved allow for retrieval of mishandled or abused units, and most of our models are quite capable of defending themselves."

"What the heck are these?" Ukyo pointed down into a showcase.

"Laptops," said the clerk. "Doll sized units capable of many functions that can be carried in a purse or backpack. When a full sized unit might be too much, such as a one-room apartment, a laptop such as Plum there might suit the needs of the customer better."

Akane glanced over at the Cute & Fuzzy Mascot subsection of the Laptops area and shuddered. Some things were too frightening. "So you're saying that Hotaru isn't human and therefore it's all right to sell her?"

"Hotaru is very human, but there are some differences," argued the clerk. "While she's 99% human, she knows that she is an android replica created for a singular purpose. Planetary defense."

"So she's an android superhero?" Ukyo asked, having a sudden vision of herself as Spatgirl. Wearing a purple skintight outfit with a yellow cape and utility belt, swinging across Nerima on her spatline and fighting injustice. It was oddly familiar because she'd fantasized a few times about doing just such a thing during her vengeance quest, probably the effect of Western comics and spending way too many sleepless nights hunting for Ranma. "You've got laptops and android maids and nurses and such, I'd think superhero types would be too specific a market."

"Yes, well, we also do bodyguard models, and our founder was fond of the concept of android superheroines," the clerk said with a shrug. "Once we determine there's a need for such, we go ahead and put out a few. So far Hotaru's the only one we placed. Pity."

"Can we get back to the immorality of slave trading?" Akane asked.

Ranma had tuned out all the talking. Akane was off on her own tangent. Ukyo was pretty much the same. On the other hand, maybe he could get enough for a robot dog? He'd been over to Hiroshi's once and seen that 'Samurai Showdown' thing, and he'd heard of some martial artists who trained their dog to help 'em in fights. (That he could have a doggie run off evil nasty teeth/claw/glowing eyes nasty bad c-c-c-c-cats never really occurred to him. Really. Honest.)

That he'd then have someone who actually listened to him - nah - he'd never think about that.

The display area quickly had five times the previous number of doggies as various pooches discovered someone was looking over that section and came rushing out to see if maybe, finally, someone was for THEM!

Ranma had a faint unfamiliar smile on his face as he looked them over. He could have a puppy and this time his stupid oyaji wouldn't roast him over a fire and have him for lunch.

There were Scottish terriers and black labs and big old Akita and German Shepherds and pikachus (he'd snuck over while on break) and other breeds Ranma couldn't name.

"Hey there, fella," said Ranma, finally focussing on one. "What's your name?"

"My name's Fenris," growled the large wolf in a deep tone of voice.

"Fenris?" asked Ranma confused.

"That's comes from a Norse myth about a really powerful and huge wolf who was chained by the gods and will escape during Ragnarok."

"Norse? Ragnarok?"

"Ragnarok is the end of the world. And the Norse are from Norway, Sweden and that area."

"They were?"

The wolf grumbled a sigh. "You know vikings, right?"

"Oh them."

"Yeah, them."

"But ya don't look _that_ big..."

"Looks can be decieving. Besides, I was only named for him."

"Why?"

"Simple. I was designed for battle and fighting."

"You were? How?"

"Let's just say that I'm not designed to be just exactly like other wolves."

The pigtailed boy imagined Fenris running through a forest on the heels of Kuno, and then chomping on his rear, and then smirked. If he were to have a robotic pet, that would likely be the way to go. Or at the very least, be cool.

For a moment, he thought about it and then decided.

* * *

"So what all can ya do?" Ranma asked the robot wolf.

"Forcefield projection, holographic system, enhanced strength and traction capabilities," said Fenris. "You may have noticed I'm not exactly a lapdog. If I bite someone they're going to notice."

Eyeing the huge wolf and estimating that the flesh-and-blood version would weigh around four hundred pounds, Ranma nodded. "Yeah. I'd say if you bit a bus, it'd notice." Another enticing image of Kuno being chased ran through his head.

"Thank you," said Fenris, figuring that this was intended as a compliment. It was true, of course, that he could do significant amounts of damage to a vehicle through the use of his bite. "I can also extend a remote probe and operate vehicles and know quite a bit about various forms of combat."

"What's a 'holographic' anyway?"

Fenris considered his potential owner. Education: not high. Martial artist. Got it. "Holograph. You know the ninja trick of being able to split into multiple images, merge into shadows, appear to be in one place when you're somewhere else?"

Ranma grinned at the thought of a whole wolf pack chasing after Kuno. Heh. "Can you holograph something else?"

Ranma found himself momentarily surrounded by four exact doubles of himself while the wolf's eyes glowed.

The smile got a little bit broader. He got a pet AND special manuevers at the same time?

* * *

"How did this happen?" Akane questioned a half hour later.

"I'm kinda unclear on that myself, sugar," answered Ukyo.

"So, sempai, what kind of food do you make?" asked the ponytailed girl walking besides Ukyo. "I'm familiar with cakes and cookies and a number of Japanese foods!"

"Okonomiyaki," said Ukyo. "That's all I need to make, because I'm the best there is!"

"Okonomiyaki. A fried bread with lettuce, bonito flakes, and a number of toppings. Popular particularly among college students," answered Makoto as she continued to walk. "What about foods for those who have heart conditions and the like?"

"Is there something wrong with okonomiyaki?" Ukyo said in a tone that suggested that an affirmative answer was going to see the ponytailed girl returned to the store.

Ignoring the tone, or else not noticing, Makoto nodded. "Okonomiyaki is a fine Japanese food, but it is a fried food and there are a number of customers who would not be able to eat it due to health considerations. Adding side items to the menu would allow you to expand your client base and therefore your profits."

"I don't want to... ?! More customers? More profits?" Ukyo blinked repeatedly and her walking slowed as if she were having trouble grasping the concept. Yet these androids couldn't lie, right? So that meant... "You wanna tell me about what kind of side items?"

Akane shook her head, glancing sideways at her own inadvertant shadow and at Ranma's wolf. She could hardly believe she had ended up with... that.

"Pikapi Pikachu!"

Of course, she didn't understand what the little creature was saying, but then Akane hadn't initially picked it because he wanted to talk to it. She'd been going over to see what had Ranma so interested in it, and she'd seen the little yellow rodent like thing. Having seen it, she had thought that it was really cute, and declared that she would like to keep him. But she'd done that in front of the clerk, and the next thing that she knew, she had bought the 'Pikachu'.

Still, she had to admit that the little ball of fur was cute. And it was getting a bit bothersome with P-chan keeping on getting lost. Not that she wanted to replace him, but to have something that would not vanish so quickly would be nice.

"Pika?" Pikachu asked.

"I was just thinking. No real problem," Akane replied.

"Pika pi. Chu."

"Calm down. I'm not just saying it."

"Chu!"

"You're a tempermental little guy, aren't you?"

"Uhh... Akane?" interrupted Ukyo."

"Yeah?"

"I thought that you didn't know what he was saying."

"I don't."

"Then how are you answering him?"

"Umm...Good question..."

"Pi?" went the robot Pokemon.

"What is it?"

Instead of answering, the little rodent dashed in front of them and stopped, its ears twitching. It looked from side to side as if searching for something. But there was nothing that looked like it was a danger or anything.

That's when a bush attacked. "Ukyo!" yelled the seeming girl who had leapt out of the fake plant.

"Tsubasa!" screeched the chef.

"Pika... CHU!" went Pikachu, its electrical energy projectors sending out a charge at the percieved attacker.

The little group were treated to the sight of a sparking and twitching psuedo-girl as the high-level stun charge ran through his body. Once it stopped, he fell over, barely conscious and not at all able to move. "Owie..."

Satisfied that its Mistress was protected, Pikachu turned around and looked to her. "Pika?"

"I... can't..," began Akane.

"Pi...ka..."

"I can't believe it."

"Pika..."

"Not only is he cute, but he comes with pervert zapping powers!"

"Chu?"

Rushing over to her robotic Pokemon, she scooped it up and hugged it to her chest. "Watch any pervert try to come and bother me again!"

"Pika?"

"I'm going to keep you forever!"

"Pi-KA!"

"Let's see what happens when Kuno wants to hug his fierce tigress now! And I can't wait until Happosai tries to steal my panties! BWA-HAHAHAHAHA!"

"I think that's she's finally cracked Ranchan," the chef whispered.

Ranma nodded, with his wide eyed gaze never leaving his 'uncute' fiancee.

"Pika..," commented the Pikachu as it leaned back and eyed its owner warily.

Unaware of the stares she was getting, Akane continued to think about the possibilities.

"Pika?"

"Good Pikachu, good Pikachu!" Akane was happy. Her new pet was cute, could detect and zap perverts, and as he was an android likely had other skills he could bring to bear.

"Pika!" squealed Pikachu, pleased that his new owner was pleased.

"I agree," said Makoto to Pikachu.

"So, sugar, you can understand that...?" Ukyo made an uncertain gesture towards Akane's pet.

"Pikachu," helpfully supplied the critter.

"Yes, of course." Makoto smiled at the little android. "Pikachu is modelled after a species of pet monster utilized on another world. He's a faithful technorganic representation of the same creature. Just a little smarter, stronger, and such. He has an internal fusion generator and can generate voltages of up to 12 Megawatts, though the more voltage he's pumping out the longer to recharge and the shorter the duration of the blast."

"Hmmm," said Ranma to his wolf. "Can you do that?"

"No," admitted the wolf. "I don't have electrical generators."

"I do, but I have to be in Jupiter mode to use them," put in Makoto.

"PIKA!"

"That's my sister Kasumi," Akane identified to her pet. "Kasumi! What are you doing?"

"I just have to drop off this letter," said Kasumi. "My, what a cute... whatever that is."

"PIKA PIKA!" Pikachu announced as he pointed at a tree. "PIKACHU!" _Zaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappppp!_

A somewhat charcoaled shape dropped out of the tree to land in some bushes.

"GOOD Pikachu!" Akane praised her pudgy yellow rat. "Someone was stalking Kasumi? Well, you sure showed them!"

"Pika!" Pikachu nodded. He understood his duties now.

Kasumi dropped the letter in the mailbox. "So how was your visit to Cyberdyne?"

"Very interesting," admitted Ranma. "Oh wow. Talk about timing, Kasumi."

The mailman tipped his hat at the group before unloading the mailbox and driving off.

"I knew he came by at this time," admitted Kasumi. "I wanted to get Nabiki's paperwork off today."

"You left Hotaru alone with Nabiki?!" Akane looked alarmed. "Who knows what perverted things she might be doing to that poor girl. Err. Android."

"Actually 'girl' is perfectly acceptable," put in Makoto. "We're very close to our human originals you know."

"I see," said Kasumi. "Ranma, I must thank you for your birthday present. Hotaru is being a big help around the house."

"Great," said Ranma as the group walked on. He had done something right. This was cool!

After a few minutes, a twitching and still slightly charcoaled Nabiki rose from the bushes. "Okay. That was a minor setback. All I need to do is go in and get that envelope."

The lock was secure and the mailbox closed, but Nabiki knew she had to get the envelope before it went off to that Marine Drill Sergeant Hell Camp. Or boarding school. Depended on who you talked to.

Checking to make sure that no one was watching (and quite unaware that while she was unconscious that the mail had been picked up), Nabiki opened the door and reached within. Nothing. Frowning she went to tiptoe and stretched as far as she could. Still nothing. Frowning and vowing that Ranma would pay for this, Nabiki squeezed herself into the dark hole and began inching in as she tried to find the elusive letter.

A small white car pulled up to the curb just as Nabiki was in past her waist.

"Do you see that Miyuki?"

"I see it, Natsumi." The policewoman in question started snapping pictures for evidence.

Natsumi tapped the girl on the leg. Once. Twice. Thrice.

"Go away. I'm busy here."

Miyuki raised an eyebrow. Natsumi saw her raise and matched it. Poke poke.

"Go away!"

"Miss? Do you know who we are?" Natsumi Sujimoto asked the pair of legs.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll go away. If you want naked pictures of Akane or Ranma, I'll sell them to you later."

"When we were given the assignment of covering for some local officers out with the flu, I had no idea that things were so bad over here." Miyuki Kobayakawa frowned slightly as she began writing things down. "Criminals are so bad over here that they scrounge mailboxes and admit to peddling pornography to anyone passing by."

Nabiki began extricating herself from the mailbox. "I said, go awa..." Two girls. Uniforms. Patrol car. Uh oh. "Uhm. There's a very good explanation for this."

"I'm sure there is," agreed Sujimoto. "Thought of it yet?"

"Errr," said Nabiki. "Well, it's really funny how this happened."

"Why not save it for the judge," suggested Kobayakawa.

* * *

At the Tendo Dojo, Soun sighed. Genma had so wanted to play another round of Shogi, but he wasn't really into it. He had just found out that his middle daughter had seemingly become some sort of monster while he was not looking. It was likely, by his reckoning that it had been the Master's influence that had done this. And since he could not get rid of the Master, he'd have to send her someplace where she could get the help she so needed.

Still, the game might give him a little bit of a distraction and allow him to forget his troubles for a while.

But as he readied himself for the game, the phone started to ring. For a moment, he let it, thinking that Kasumi would answering. Then he remembered that she was out running an errand, and perhaps wasn't back yet. So he went over and picked the handset up, putting the reciever to his ear.

"Hello, Tendo Residence. Soun Tendo speaking," he said simply.

*"Hello, this is the police Mister Tendo,"* replied the voice on the other end of the line.

"What? Why are the police calling my home?"

*"We have someone who wishes to speak with you. Do you happen to know a young woman by the name of Nabiki?"*

"What? She's my daughter."

*"Well, two officers caught her vandalising a mailbox and when they went to talk to her about it, she admitted to peddling pornography."*

"WAH! How can she do this to her family?! Has she not learned her lesson?!"

*"Excuse me?"*

"After trying to molest our houseguest and planning to dismember her so that she could sell her parts, why must she find something _else_ to dishonor her family again?!"

*"She did what?"*

"We caught her in the act, and stopped her, but nothing seems to keep her from a life of villany! She won't even take responsibility for her actions any more!"

*"I see..."*

"That sweet little girl... and Nabiki had to go and grope her!"

*"It was a child?"*

"All of fourteen years old! Has she no shame?!"

*"You do realise that these are serious charges."*

"Nabiki doesn't seem to understand that. OH WHERE DID I GO WRONG?!"

*"Mister Tendo..."*

"MY DAUGHTER IS GOING TO BE A CAREER CRIMINAL! WAAAAAAAAAAAA...!"

* * *

On the other end of the line, Miyuki Kobayakawa held the hand set of the phone away from her ear and sighed as Mister Tendo's wailing was still comepletely loud and clear. She looked to her partner who shrugged helplessly. Then her gaze turned to the suspect in their custody.

"A-heh," went a nervously smiling Nabiki.

* * *

Cologne set her cup down, eyeing first Hotaru and then Kasumi.

Hotaru let her arm port seal itself. No point in taking the chance of dirt or dust getting in there. That would be icky.

Cologne went to thoughtful. "Defenders of the Earth? There's a real chance for such a thing to be needed?"

"Highly probable," admitted Hotaru.

"Hmmm," hmmed Cologne. "You know, I could use a new waitress." Not to mention that if some menace were to threaten the village - defending against it would be a good thing. "Shampoo and Mousse are often working at cross purposes."

Hotaru nodded. "Just keep in mind to treat us like a real person. We need breaks and stuff on occasion too. I'm sure you can find one that will work out."

Cologne grinned back, finding there was something infectiously likable about the little girl. "I'll make her a full member of the tribe if she works out." After all, if this warrior girl felt she was part of the tribe - all the more reason to fight for it.

* * *

Even the tough nasty vicious girls were eyeing Nabiki as they would a shark dropped into their midst.

"You can't leave me in here with her, I've heard the talk!" Noriko insisted to a guard. "She's worse than that Hannibal Lector guy!"

Nabiki briefly considered denying anything but having that sort of reputation here might actually give her a measure of safety. She merely smirked therefore and let other people interpret that as they would.

"Noriko, you know we can't go moving anyone around." Officer Habayashi frowned. "Just because she's a pornographer, child molester, mail tamperer, and apparently connected to that Yakuza ring that deals with 'harvesting' and selling transplant organs doesn't mean she's a cannibal."

There was muttering from the other cellmates as they edged away as far as they could from Nabiki.

Nabiki had come to a realization. This sort of thing happened to Ranma all the time. It was a lot funnier when it happened to Ranma. "Hey, it was business. Purely business. That's all."

If anything the looks of disgust and fear increased.

"Kami-sama, if I make it through the night, I'll never ever ever shoplift again," wailed one girl as she broke. She was just fourteen, she had so much live for, and now it looked as if she was doomed to die in an overcrowded jailcell!

"HEY!" Nabiki exclaimed, then decided she'd better just keep her mouth shut. At least none of these girls were "inviting" her to "dance".

The Officer merely gestured at Nabiki. "She's a minor still, and innocent until proven guilty. If she eats anyone, well, we'll know about it and she'll be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law."

Noriko looked at the young girl smirking on the bunk and knew that if it came down to it, if it was a case of 'me or her' - she was going to make damn sure she wasn't the one to be devoured.

* * *

"Sasuke! Look at that and what do you see?"

Sasuke peered around the large pile of boxes he was carrying. "The foul sorcerer Saotome, along with that chef girl and Akane Tendo? Along with a large dog, a pudgy yellow something or other, and some other girl?"

"Exactly," said Kuno, posing dramatically. "The scurrilous rogue hath added another beauty to his harem!"

"How dare he when that should be your harem!"

"Exactly," said Kuno. "I shall free them and then date with Akane, the pigtailed girl, and quite possibly that tall one!"

"Of course," said Sasuke.

"Good, prepare the approach mentioned in that shojo manga of mine twisted sister," said Kuno.

* * *

Pikachu stiffened slightly. Internal radar pinged two individuals in the park they were passing - concealed behind trees. One with concealed weapons, the other brandishing a large wooden stick. "Pika pi?"

Odd fanfare music began playing. (Sasuke had concealed the boom box.) Hidden spotlights clicked on.

Ranma and Akane spotted the drifting rose petals and looked over at each other and groaned.

Kuno stood out from behind a tree. "To free my ladies to worship me!"  
Sasuke stood up and bowed apologetically. "To denounce foul sorcery."  
"To free my beauties so that they may show their love!"  
"And whisk them off to his bower above!"  
"Team Kuno striking in the name of Right!"  
"Surrender now or Ranma he'll smite."

Ranma blinked. "Ya gotta be kidding me."

"Pika?" Pikachu asked Akane.

Akane set Pikachu on the ground, looked up at Kuno and smiled the brightest and happiest smile she had ever turned in his direction. "Pikachu. The guy with the stick is a pervert. What do we do with perverts?"

Pikachu smiled too. He knew his part now. "Pika CHUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" _ZAAAAPPP!_

The boom box exploded. The searchlights sizzled. The flower petals shriveled and burned. Finally the searchlights exploded with enough force to propel Tatewaki Kuno and Sasuke skyward.

"Team Kuno doth blast off," complained Tatewaki Kuno as he dwindled into the distance.

Akane swept her pikachu up and hugged the beastie. "You are just so wonderful!"

Ranma began to smile, picturing P-chan being displaced from Akane's bed. What a terrible thing to happen. Darn.

* * *

Azusa Shiratori skated along, happy as could be. The day was nice, the people were friendly, and she had seen a great many cute things. None of which had been good enough to add to her collection however. Which was the only thing that could brighten up her day.

But as she saw the yellow mouse thing being carried around, she knew that she just _had_ to have it! It was _so_ cute that she couldn't refuse the urge. Since she had little trouble in giving into her cravings for cute items, that meant that it was a quick battle. Even the knowledge that it was being held by the girl who'd taken her Charlotte away from her didn't matter. She had to have that cute mouse!

"Pierre! Pierre!" she called out as she skated towards her target with her arms spread out.

Ukyo groaned. "What does that klepto want now?"

Pikachu took in her words and ran through a quick process.

Unknown Threat Approaching  
Known Information: Described as 'klepto' ('klepto' = thief)  
Course Of Action: Defend Owner and Property. Stop Thief.

Not realising the speed of the processes that her Pikachu could go, Akane was surprised to see it leap from her arms and run to Azusa.

"Come to Azusa, Pierre!" called out the skater.

Seemingly obligingly, Pikachu did so, running so fast that it seemed to blur at times. Then he leapt, with Azusa putting out her arms so that she could catch her prize.

Except that her 'prize' did not wish to be caught. His leap had him slamming into her head, sending her tumbling backwards head over heels until she came to a stop a hundred meters away in a heap.

One could almost see the little tweety birds circling her head.

Landing on all four paws on the sidewalk, Pikachu took in his handiwork and gave a satisfied "Pika!"

"Well, that's one way to get rid of troublemakers..," commented Ukyo.

* * *

The one thing that Nabiki had never considered when she had thought about people in jail was that it could be so... _boring_. What with the fact that entertainment was not high on the list of things provided by the cops, and the way that her fellow prisioners tended to avoid her, she found herself with litle to do. Not that she was about to bother the other inmates. Right then the misunderstanding about her actions had afforded her a bit of a cushion, and she was loathe to do something that might jepordize that. The truth would come out soon enough, and she didn't want to make that happen too quickly.

On the other side of the cell, the others she so disdained were talking amongst each other, and making plans to keep themselves safe.

* * *

Cologne pogoed into the Cyberdyne store and looked around. It seemed odd to have so many human forms, and not have any life to them. That was muted by the way that the owners had designed the place. Instead of just feeling insitutional, it managed to be... attractive. Still, she was not there to judge the decor, but to make a purchase.

Kumiko looked up from her counter and smiled. That one purchase from the Saotome boy seemed to be doing much for their business. "Can I help you?"

"Yes, I believe that you can."

"What would you like to see?"

"I was looking to purchase an android."

"Very good. If you would come with me Ma'am,' the android salesgirl said with a nod and a wave of her hand to indicate a spot further in.

Cologne was an Elder of the Nichieju tribe, a sometimes irascible old woman, a dedicated martial artist, and had many roles that she fulfilled. While she wanted to see her great granddaughter happy, that was not the only thing that concerned her - it was within the top five but it wasn't the main thing.

A leader must be willing to make sacrifices for the common good, in her case the tribe. Shampoo's current lack of success had concerned the Elder, and not just in capturing the heart of Ranma Saotome, but in developing further as a warrior and potential future leader. Not that most of the current generation of Nichieju didn't seem a few bricks short of a load. (She'd decided this was evidence of too much inbreeding within the limited gene pool of the village when she'd noticed it a few years back.)

"Tell me, dear, can these female machines have children?"

"No, miss. That's normally not possible," Kumiko informed the old woman. "They're very good with children, most of them anyway, but to have children in the normal human manner requires very specialized equipment."

Cologne's disappointment briefly showed, but she cleared it. "Well, then, I manage a restaurant and could use a waitress... how very interesting."

Kumiko looked around but could detect nothing out of the ordinary.

Cologne was sure of it now. No ki but they had something else and all of these "corpses" were avidly paying attention to her every move and word. More, it was subtle but she was getting a feeling of "eagerness" as she had...

Spirits! Like Jusenkyo and some other locations, there was a certain feel to locations that had something similar to what she was getting. Well then, this was interesting indeed.

"So what of these contracts, show me the one on... that one."

Kumiko blinked as the cane jabbed out. "Uhm yes."

Cologne took the sheet and quickly went through it. A lot of legalese, but she got the gist of it. "No abuses or misuses, and if it doesn't work out the marionette can break the agreement with a full refund to the customer, they gain much of the privledges and breaks of a fully human employee, I see. Hmmmm. As close to human as they seem to be, it makes a degree of sense. What if one wanted to adopt?"

Kumiko startled at that and a few of the marionettes twitched in shock. It wasn't unknown for someone to get so attached to their android that they wanted to adopt or marry them but it was usually the result of long association.

"Well, that technically is possible, though the legal status is a little shaky at best," admitted Kumiko finally.

"What about this one," said Cologne. "Full martial arts skills downloaded and waitressing. Oh, and it wouldn't hurt if she had some knowledge of Chinese cooking. There will be times when I might have to leave her in charge of the restaurant."

The unit in question went ahead and activated herself, curious and wanting to meet this ancient human.

"Very well," said Kumiko. "Perhaps you two should discuss this."

"A good idea," agreed Cologne. "I am Cologne, owner of the Nekohanten Chinese restaurant and elder of the Chinese Amazon tribe."

The unit bowed as the ancient bowed, not sure of this, but beginning to allow herself hope. "I am Atsuko Mishima, but most people call me Nuku Nuku."

* * *

Cologne looked at the redheaded android and nodded. "Well, it is nice to meet you Nuku Nuku."

"Thank you!" chirped Nuku Nuku, "It's great to meet you too auntie!"

"You seem... happy."

"It's always nice to be happy! I mean, who wants to be sad?"

"Most people would prefer to be happy."

"Right auntie!"

"Would you mind telling me why you're calling me auntie?" the Elder asked as she raised an eyebrow.

"Why not? You're a nice old lady, and you're supposed to be important, so I'm supposed to treat you nice, aren't I?"

"That is true, I suppose."

"And it's always good to be nice to your elders, right?"

"Many of those I know tend to be... less polite."

"Really? That isn't nice."

Chuckling, Cologne smiled at the android girl. "You are rather refreshing child."

"I am?"

"You seem to be so... innocent."

"I don't know about anything like that..."

"I didn't think that you would. But, trust me, it's a good thing."

"It is? WAI!"

"You seem to like that."

"Mmm-hm. But..."

"Yes?"

"Didn't you come in here to buy an android?"

"That was the general idea. I was thinking of getting another waitress, one that might possibly help my village. But I was also thinking that I might induct her into the village."

"You don't care that we're not human?"

"Of course not," Cologne told her, waving off the thought, "A person is a person."

"And you picked me?"

"It seems that way."

Nuku Nuku's face lit up and her eyes got all sparkly. "I got chosen... YAY!"

Watching the android bounce around the showroom floor, she let a small smile spread across her face. It had been a long time since someone had been that friendly with her. Some gave her respect because of her position, others considered her an opponent, and still others treated her as an annoying old bat. But to have one who had an honest like and trust for her felt good.

Kumiko came over at the commotion and schooled her face to show nothing. "Have you come to a decision?"

"I'll take that one."

"Very good Ma'am. It will only take a little while, so if you would like, you can browse or wait in our waiting room until she is ready."

"Perhaps I will," the Matriarch said.

* * *

_Back with Ranma Prime:_

"Uhm, hang on," said Ranma, holding his hands in a "time out" gesture he'd seen sports teams use. "Nabiki's in jail? World maybe in trouble enough we got robot girls coming to help out? Got anything a little less dangerous?"

"Oh, I think I have just the thing," said the Raven.


	6. Chapter 6: Aliens Among Us

_Back with Ranma Prime:_

"Uhm, hang on," said Ranma, holding his hands in a "time out" gesture he'd seen sports teams use. "Nabiki's in jail? World maybe in trouble enough we got robot girls coming to help out? Got anything a little less dangerous?"

"Oh, I think I have just the thing," said the Raven.

* * *

Son of Omake  
chapter 6: Aliens Among Us

by myself and Kender_Sci

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes.

* * *

The image was of young Ranma and a younger Genma, going through one of the red torii gates at a shrine. Through and into a different setting altogether.

"What was that?" asked the Ranma watching.

The Raven made an odd croaking noise as he pulled notes out of his tail plumage and then sorted through them. "Here we go. Looks like you managed to get into trouble later in the timeline, then wished things had turned out differently. It was granted."

"That sounds ominous," said Ranma as the images shifted.

"While it was not immediately apparent to THAT Genma or Ranma, as they are arriving in the 1980s, was that the branch point had happened a few decades previously." The Raven clacked his beak as the images played out.

* * *

It wasn't a particularly special day, or at least it hadn't started out that way. June 28th in the year 1959, weather was mainly wherever you were at that time. If you happened to be in New York City, it was fairly typical up until 10:53am of that very day.

That was when it was first spotted. Large glittery metal object, decidedly non-saucer shaped. More like a smoothly curved teardrop with stubby wings. It came in near the moon, and orbitted the Earth four times.

The first broadcast was incomprehensible gibberish. Again using New York City as a reference, the ship broadcast for fifteen minutes starting at 11:12am. The broadcast at 12:19am was gibberish as well, but this time included words pulled from the dozens of languages being sent via radio at that time.

Even before the linguists had finished working it over, the words "rescue" and "crash" had provided a basic motivation for this event and even the paranoia of that age was considering the possibility that this was exactly what was claimed.

The third broadcast was at 1:05pm in New York City. The people on the ship were apparently in serious trouble and about to lose control of their ship. It was the last broadcast before the ship began plunging into the atmosphere about three quarters of the way through that fourth orbit.

Each orbit had been a little slower, the first one insanely fast. The ship entered the atmosphere still too fast but at a fairly shallow angle - still trying to reduce their speed.

The ship began breaking apart in re-entry, now being tracked by chase planes that were only briefly able to catch view of the ship before it was out of their visual range again.

That, more than any claim of the broadcasts, convinced the vast majority of those watching and listening that the broadcasts were genuine. Contact with genuine extraterrestrials - and it was because their ship had mechanical problems.

Anyone who owned a car and gone for a long trip could sympathize.

It wasn't until well after the crash into shallow water off the coast that a visual picture of the extraterrestrials became available, one of the communications indicating that a signal had been sent to their homeworld but that it would take "a little time" for help to arrive.

When the television cameras saw the survivors coming out of their hatch, opinions had largely already been made on to what to do about these aliens. After all, if their world were coming by to pick them up later and they were here by accident - then it would be better not to go blowing up these aliens. Not that there weren't a lot of stupid paranoid people in power - but they were also stupid paranoid greedy people - and there was an opportunity here for grateful aliens to give something back to the people who played host to their stranded citizens.

However, appearance DID count for something, and the aliens' appearance on international television (even in black and white) did form/alter some opinions once it was revealed they were -

* * *

"AIEEEE!"

The Raven glanced at the briefly terrified boy and nodded. "Yeah. Thought you'd say something like that."

"The horror, the horror," said Ranma, not wanting to look.

* * *

Even before the aliens landed, speculation had run rampant over just what would be in that ship. Varying ideas had come about with everyone and his uncle making comments as to what they would find coming out of there. Some scientists made suggestions that these might be three tentacled creatures that breathed sulfur. Others wondered if they might possibly be light beings that floated on air. Military people had fits as they worried about this possibly being the prelude to an invasion. And there was even on person on the street who had thought that an individual alien might be looking like a gorilla with a space helmet for a head.

What came out of that ship was definitely humanoid, and was certainly not ugly. If anything, the first seen were attractive female specimens, and many guys blinked in response. The 'space babes' were not the usual strange fare that would be expected in a situation like this, and the fact that they were mankind's first encounter with a life beyond their planet, it was a rather amazing revelation. To think that the human form was the one that was a basic standard for two races was mind boggling.

And it set off a whole series of _new_ speculation as people considered everything from their physical attractiveness, to the religious ramifications of this discovery.

However, the aliens were just meeting the first human greeting party, and as such, it became humanity's first direct physical contact with these aliens.

Instead they came out wearing skintight pressure suits, helmets that were cracked open and then carried under an arm. Humanoid. Extremely so.

They could pass for extremely attractive human women, if you got past the cat ears and tail.

The race had been artificially created generations ago by a race that had visited ancient Earth. The Egyptian gods had been a race of cosmic travellers who had swung by Earth and one of their number had come up with this idea for a race of servants combining the ferocity and combative prowess of cats with the adaptability and tool-using characteristics of humans.

What that genetic engineer had gotten was a race of playful kittenish near humans. Who happened to be cute, stacked, cheerful, friendly as all get out, and about as subtle as a load of high explosive.

Trying with foxes and a few other species had added sub-breeds, but the results had all fallen a bit short of expectations apparently.

The races had been left behind, to see if fearless warriors would develop. The world was slowly becoming less and less habitable, and the pressure should have caused them to fall upon each other.

Instead they'd gotten together, figured out ways to use the left behind technology, and begun exploring space to find a new home. Why they'd been left behind was something the races themselves didn't quite understand.

Nekomimi ("Catears") Tribe were the most common. Of the fifty one survivors, thirty one were catgirls. There were six foxgirls, two dolphin-girls, a catboy, and eleven others. Representitives of their respective groups actually.

The reaction to cute (and somewhat gravity defying) long-legged girls from outer space was entirely different to what it might have been had they been tentacle monsters. There were no strange alien powers involved in the sudden outpouring of sympathy for the shipwrecked aliens, simply human nature at work.

The agreement was eventually hammered out, helped by the proximity to the United Nations. The amount of alien technology that these others possessed would be shared by the Security Council members equally, though much of it was not duplicatable by the aliens themselves or by human technology of that time.

The aliens themselves became refugees and their dying world abandoned for a new home on Earth.

Using what was now available, plans were made to colonize the moon, erect orbital space colonies, and begin terraforming Mars.

Though in 1961, something happened that rocked the scientific community and had repercussions throughout both refugee and human society. A member of the Nekomimi Tribe named K'tae became pregnant after mating with a human male. Eight months and four days later, a baby Nekomimi was born, though she didn't have a tail. Kizna was a celebrity from her first day, and a photogenic diva as soon as she could coo at the cameras.

Religions tried to fit this into their worldview, geneticists tried to come up with a rational explanation, philosophers debated, and photographers snapped lots of pictures.

The next was a Wolf Tribe member in Australia. At which point things began snowballing as it was realized that most of the races involved were more than capable, and most perfectly willing, to cuddle up with humans.

Some insisted it was all a sinister plot. Despite that those actually associating with any of the Nekomimi would attest to their complete lack of guile.

By the time the 1980s and the two Saotome's arrival rolled around, it was normal to find an Alien amongst the human populace and their numbers had gotten greater than ever. In some areas there was still some remaining prejudice. In most they were accepted.

* * *

Soun Tendo wasn't sure where he'd gotten the luck that he had. After having to suffer under his cruel and nasty Master, may his name never be even _thought_, and being a not so wealthy man, he'd found himself blessed with the woman who'd come into his life. He didn't know how she could have been so willing to be with him, but he was sure as heck not going to dismiss what they had. Some of the neighbors might have been amazed to see him with one of the aliens, but the affection that she gave her mate was all worth it. She made his life bright and happy, and he couldn't imagine what he'd do without her having come into his life.

And she'd made his life so much the better when he'd given her his daughters. Each of them was a joy in and of herself, and together they were the lights of his life. Kasumi had inherited her mother's caring and warm nature, Nabiki was proving to be a bright girl, and Akane wanted to protect them all, even though she was the smallest in the family. They were his babies, and he wished that he could keep them with him forever.

Though if what he'd called them together fulfilled its possibilities, he had a chance to come as close as he'd likely get.

"What's up Daddy?" Akane asked.

He smiled at her and her sisters. "Its about the paper that your sister found."

"The one that had the 'pwomise'?"

"Yes, that's the one."

"Oh! What is it?! What is it?!"

"Akane!" Kasumi gently censured. "You shouldn't bother him like that."

"I don't wanna bother... But I wanna _know_!"

"There's nicer ways to ask..."

Nabiki smirked. "But she's just a kid, right?"

"Well... yes..."

"So... What was this promise on the paper I found?"

"It's marriage. One of you will marry the son of someone I know when you and he get older," Soun answered.

"We will?!" the trio of little girls chorused.

"You will. It's my hope that the one that gets married will be have a long and strong marriage to him."

His youngest daughter's eyes got huge. "Really?"

"Yes."

"What's his name?"

The Tendo patriarch looked over his daughters and smiled at each of them.

* * *

There they were, the three daughters Tendo.

They were typical of the Nekomimi Tribe, with a mainly human appearance. There were differences, particularly internal, but there were some external differences as well.

Tails and ears if one just glanced. Some offspring of human-tribal ended up with tail-less offspring, or they'd have normal human ears but a tail, but the overwhelming majority of mixed race offspring ended up looking just like the Tribal parent did.

Some differences were becoming apparent now that it was 1981, twenty two years after the Tribals had first encountered humanity. Tribals aged differently, going through rapid periods of growth to reach a "stage" and then remain at that stage until the next period of growth. The Tribals remained young-looking for years, seemingly stuck in adolescence until their thirties or forties. Their next stage had a certain maturity but still looked mainly young.

This could have some odd effects with the Tribal seeming to be years younger than their human classmates despite having grown up alongside them. Then the growth spurt and the Tribal would outpace their contemporaries until the humans caught up again.

The Tribals were also prone to differences in sleep schedules. Soun's wife was of Nekomimi tribe, which meant that in the feline manner she was up at odd hours of the night and prone to taking naps at intervals during the day. Naturally, her three daughters had the same tendencies.

It was also determined that something the Japanese called otaku-ism existed within many of the tribals. They would learn of some particular bit of fantasy or history or culture, and they would embrace it with singleminded enthusiasm. The rest of the world called it by a variety of other names of course. Sometimes condescendingly, sometimes with annoyance, sometimes with amusement.

Which, of course, led to German wolfboy samurai or Peruvian foxgirl Viking skalds or other such strangeness.

In the case of the three Tendos this of course manifested a little differently.

K'thi was of the Nekomimi tribe and in their usual manner of trying to blend in, at least a little bit, had dug into the Japanese culture with that unrestrained focus that Nekomimi sometimes had. She had found that Soun Tendo was descended from a line of martial artists who had practiced the Tendo naginata-ryuu.

Unfortunately, the naginata-ryuu was practiced by another branch of the family. What this branch had was apparently a martial arts style called Anything Goes.

Soun had been more than a little surprised when a Tribal had begun hanging around him. Since the days of K'tae it wasn't unheard of for tribal-human pairings, but even when confronted several times with this attractive stranger - he'd not made the connection. He'd been seemingly oblivious of the possibility until K'thi had taken matters into her own paws about six months after they'd met.

Kasumi was born nine months after K'thi took the initiative on that hot summer night.

It was when Akane was six years old that two strangers had appeared and tried to look him up. They'd met away from the house rather than potentially alarm his daughters, and frankly explaining what his martial arts training had been like to his daughters was something he wasn't ready to do.

Or, at least, that had been the plan.

* * *

"I can't figure out who it would be, and I'd feel better if you went home right now and kept an eye on the girls," said Soun, walking quickly along the street.

"My sister Nyanko is quite capable of keeping an eye on them," said K'thi. "Why can't it be your old friend?"

"Because," said Soun, stopping when the bar was in sight. "Because Genma Saotome is dead. We were serving under a terrible Master, training night and day, and Genma came up with an idea to get the Master drunk and then blow him up in a cave."

"Seems a bit excessive," said K'thi, thinking a pulse-rifle or grenade would likely have worked better.

"No, no, no - we had to be sure!" Soun shuddered just thinking about the evil oompah-loompah. "Unfortunately he used too much explosive and he tripped."

"Couldn't he have survived somehow?" asked K'thi.

"No, I buried what was left of him," said Soun. "I found enough for -"

"SOUN! MY OLD FRIEND!"

Soun Tendo looked, screamed like a girly man, then fainted dead away.

"Ah, you must be... are those ears real?"

_schinnng!_

Genma grinned nervously and tried not to swallow. "...nice sword you've got there. Mind moving it away from my neck just a bit?"

* * *

Soun had taken awhile to get used to the idea, and he still wasn't sure about parts of it, but the more he talked to this guy (and the more sake he drank) - the more he was convinced this WAS Genma Saotome.

"So you want to reinstate some honor agreement - an arranged marriage to unite the families?" asked K'thi.

"Yesh, my son ish gonna be a grrrrrreat martial artist," said Genma, deciding to address his comments to the Mrs Tendo in the center of the other two. Strange that there'd only been one at the start of the drinking but now there were three identical twins or something here.

"I see," said K'thi. "What happens if he likes more than one of them?"

"He'll jusht choose one," said Genma sagely.

"What if more than one of them likes him?" asked K'thi.

"Hah?" asked Genma.

"Thash white," said Soun before his eyes rolled up in head and he collapsed onto the table.

K'thi picked up her saucer before the collapse and delicately lapped some of the cream up before addressing Genma again. "Let's change this line here. If more than one of my little girls chooses him, he's got to make her happy too. It wouldn't be fair for one of them to find a husband and neither of the other two do. He is manly enough for this, isn't he?"

Genma tried his best to focus through the haze. "You not related to Nodoka is you? No. I'd have noticed if she had a tail. I think."

K'thi quickly made a few addendums, a couple of quid pro quos, a couple of provisos in the document. "Can you press your hanko here?"

* * *

Three little girls twitched their three little tails in unison. "So your friend really came back from the dead to keep this pledge?"

"Yes, that's right," said Soun, hanging his head. "They'll return when Ranma is sixteen, and one of you will marry him to unite the two families."

"Or more, we are tribals, dear," said K'thi.

* * *

_Prime:_

"This is gonna be trouble, ain't it?"

The Raven shrugged with a flutter of his wings. "Depends on your definition of trouble. Look at the roles they slipped into."

"Yup. Trouble."

* * *

Some things had changed. Some things remained the same.

It was April and it was off-and-on rainy. It was a Sunday. The school year had begun just a week previously.

There were changes. Because Akane was a Chinese Amazon otaku, the morning challenge actually had a reason behind it. Not a very good reason, and certainly not one Akane would have approved had she been consulted.

Tatewaki Kuno was still a moron. A difference here was that he wanted Akane as his pet. He even had a nice collar with her name made up. Another difference was that with the various Tribals around, Tatewaki's sister was intrigued by the thought as well and had met Akane a few times.

Akane was annoyed by Kodachi, though not as much as with her brother. Kodachi kept using "baby talk" on her and trying to feed her taiyaki and other treats. Akane had more than once fantasized about tying Kodachi Kuno up and then treating HER as a pet. The only thing stopping her on one occasion had been the idea that Kodachi would enjoy it.

Nabiki, being an anime/manga otaku who also had a network of contacts through her dojinishi work, had brought out a "potentially confirmed" on that point.

Which, naturally, left Akane feeling a bit put out whenever she had to speak to one Kodachi Kuno.

Ranma had gone through a long training journey - not different.

Ranma had trained in variable gravity fighting - different.

Of course, it had gotten really different in one important respect.

* * *

Genma was capable of learning, despite what his son and others might have thought. He wouldn't have come up with his own fighting techniques, or even figured out how to handle his 'dread Master' if that had been true. So, he had taken a lesson from his use of the scroll, and decided never to try anything like that ever again. He knew that risking certain things would not be good for his health, and he already had a problem in the fact that he couldn't be sure that he'd ever get back to his home universe again.

That didn't stop him from being an idiot though.

The technology that the Tribals had brought gave him all sorts of new chances at getting his son to be the best around, which was sort of the point of the whole journey. He'd hone the boy into his concept of the perfect martial artist, and planned on using whatever he could do to so. Anything, from devices used for the practice, to spending time in high gravity to build up strength were all used. Sure, it was hard, and the boy had a rough time through much of it, but there were sacrifices that one made for the Art.

However, there were some things that could only be done by magic, and Genma had no problem with trying anything, provided that it could work. A 'cursed' training ground was a simple place and one that he didn't particularly worry about. But it could be useful, and if there were some sort of problem with it, well then, getting around that danger would be even more training.

Bascially, he just did what he would have done had he not been shot into another dimension, and went to Jusenkyo. The Guide had tried to warn them, but Genma leapt off, and called his son to follow. There was a fight, and at the end, Ranma was dunked.

This time was different though, as the man in the Maoist uniform told them simply, "Young sir fall in Spring Of Drowned Cat-toy. Very tragic story of Tribal girl who lose toy in spring ten year ago. Now whoever fall in spring smell/taste of catnip. Is very tragic... well no. Is very amusing story."

That was why Ranma and his father were running through the streets of Nerima as if their lives depended on it.

"Mrow! Smells so good!" called out one of the catgirls behind him as they chased after them in a happy little daze.

They had reasons to run like that after all.

"Stupid Pop! I still say this is all your fault!" snapped the pigtailed boy as he dashed away from the feline females with his father.

Heaving a sigh, Genma wondered why his son seemed intent on blaming him for the situation, but couldn't disagree that their was a problem, though he was more intent on getting his son to the meeting.

* * *

"We'll be back to Vampire Princess Catgirl Miyuu in a moment," said the television. "This just in. A chase scene has developed in the Nerima Ward of Tokyo. A portly panda and a young boy were seen racing from the scene."

"Hey, that's the shopping mall!" said Nabiki, pointing at the sight. "Nyaaa! Lookit!"

"What is it, Nyabiki?" Akane asked, deciding the Chun Li outfit was a bit much and pausing on her way back up the stairs. Maybe it was something really wrong?

"Nya! Chanan's Exotique Weaponrie is having a sale!" said Nabiki.

_Zip!_ Akane's tail lashed behind her as she looked. "Oooooh. 15% off blunt weapons."

* * *

"STUPID OLD PANDA!" yelled a young man as he fled at high speeds.

"Growf!" said the panicked panda, pointing down an alleyway before taking that turn himself.

"Huh? WAIT!" yelled the young man, turning and sprinting towards the alley.

Left, right, left, straight through the intersection, follow the panda over the fence, across the backyard where young catgirls were sunning themselves...

"ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HH!" yelled Ranma as he somehow managed to nudge his speed up a little.

Various interrogative sounds followed and then the back wall came apart even as the students of the "T&A School For Wayward Catgirls" began movement.

"Growf!" protested a panda. This could be his fault? Why not at all. Couldn't possibly be anything he had done.

"NYAAA!" came a loud call echoing off the walls.

"Ah hah!" said Ranma, grabbing a section of wall and swinging over it.

"You must be Ranma!" declared some middle-aged man with a moustache and long hair. "We were expecting you and your father earlier. And from the front door actually."

"Hah?" managed Ranma.

"Yes, we were..." a middle-aged catwoman sniffed the air, dropping her naginata. "We were... Just a moment. Dear?"

"It's so good WHAT," said Soun as his leap forward to grab the boy was interrupted by his wife grabbing him. "Wait a moment," was his comment as he was yanked to the stairs. "But that's my good gi," came a token protest amongst the ripping of cloth. "What the -," came his indication of something going on in the master bedroom of the house. "but... oh it can wait."

Ranma scratched his head, not knowing that in addition to getting stoned or soporific - some cat types experienced certain other urges under the influence of catnip. He just knew things had gotten weird around him again.

Three girls exited the home. Two wore kimonos (though one was wearing a maid's cap and the other had a decals of some anime series on her obi) and the second was wearing a Chinese garment that looked fairly familiar.

"Heya," said the cheongsam-wearer, glancing up at an open window. "Uhm..."

"Good afternoon," said the maid cap-wearer, bowing.

The otaku shrugged. "Well, it's been a strange day all around, hmmmm. What's that smell?"

The three girls began sniffing the air.

Ranma knew that he was in for some sort of strangeness, as his life was constantly surrounded by such. The fact that catgirls got silly around him when he was splashed by water was just another example of that happening to him. It wasn't like he _asked_ for any of it, but it seemed to be par for the course when one was the son of one Genma Saotome. As it was, he knew that, given the proper means and opportunity, his father would screw up again. And he'd be left having to handle the aftermath.

Intellectually, he knew that he should be running right about then. That was the logical thing to do, and for his self preservation instincts, that was the only choice. However, the old 'deer in the headlights' situation seemed strangely appropriate, as he was stuck having come face to face with the exact sort of Tribals that had been the ones that would go nuts over his curse. But before he could do anything about it, the three of them were jumping him.

Actually, he wasn't sure 'jumping' was the right word for it, as their actions weren't quite like that. Rather, he was tackled by the one in the oddly familiar outfit as she nearly used a piledrive on him, and wrapped her arms around him in the tightest hug that he'd ever come across. Then there was the one with the anime decals on her obi, who pressed against his side with her face against his hair, and kept trying to snuggle up to him, which had the effect of rolling her breasts along his body. As if she didn't want to be left out, the one in the maid's cap nestled against him, and stroked his body in rather pleasant ways and for a moment, he actually had some comfort.

'HELLO!'

The eldest of the teen catgirls had just slipped a hand under his pants and boxers, eliciting that particular response.

Opposite her, the mangaphile seemed content to rub herself against him in rather pleasing ways.

And with the youngest one holding him as she was, he was surprised that he had any ribs left, though he did hope that she wouldn't try to give him some pet name, like 'George'. Though she did mumble certain words of affection a _lot_.

Standing back, Genma smiled at the sight of girls who could only be Soun's daughters being so taken with his boy. By his reckoning, it must have been something that his son had inherited from him.

K'thi was torn at the moment, what with being pleased that her daughters seemed to be so happy with the boy, put out by the free show they were putting on, and wanting to drag her husband off for some long and passionate loving, even if said husband was totally confused at the moment.

After a moment she stuck her head back in through the bedroom window and commenced her previous activities. Though it took her a few moments to realize Soun had fallen asleep during her inattention.

Not that Ranma could notice what the 'adults' were doing, as he was in a pile with three very happy catgirls. One apparently wanted him so bad that she refused to let him go, another's body was in contact with him in such a way that there could be no doubt as to her gender, and the third was going to get a very definite reaction if she continued groping under his pants like that.

So, at the moment, all he could do was to struggle as hard as he could.

* * *

There was a concern in some parts of the world. Tribals bred true. With human/Tribal pairings, the resulting offspring was only very rarely NOT a Tribal. Tribal/human pairings were not uncommon. Tribal/human pairings often had lots of offspring. Therefore the second generation of Tribals was a bumper crop with over 200% growth rate over the previous generation. This was a little less in areas where multiple Tribals all seemed to attach themselves to a single human.

Which had an odd effect. Those worried about the flood of nekomimi and such were less disapproving when these group relations occurred. The majority of humans didn't worry about this, partly because the Tribals were all fairly cute and certainly didn't INTEND any harm. Partly the majority didn't care because there still weren't a whole lot of Tribals when viewed as a percentage of planetary population. There were also the few experts who were consulted on this who thought it likely that the process would level off eventually.

It was well known, in certain circles, that if two catgirls fixated on the same guy there would be occasional friction. There would be occasional spats. There would be occasional scheduling conflicts. There would be occasional times where the guy found himself all alone and two catgirls engaged in a territorial dispute somewhere else.

However, Ranma found himself dealing with another problem altogether caused by events that were completely beyond his control. While only a certain percentage of real cats had a reaction to catnip, all nekomimi reacted to catnip. This was not the problem though, even though he had three increasingly amorous catgirls hanging onto him.

The problem that Ranma faced was not how different the timeline was, but the similiarity thereof.

Several years ago, Genma had heard of the amazing fighting potential of the female nekomimi. Most male nekomimi tended to be a bit lazy, but the females tended to enjoy physical activities. It was when their protective/maternal instincts got involved that one risked awakening a sleeping dragon. Even vicious nasty amoral criminals hesitated to hurt a child if there was a nekomimi around. In fact, it was really best if one avoided doing such a thing. If her mate was anywhere nearby, killing or severely wounding that mate might very well trigger the same reaction.

Having such stories, even without any details, about an apparently very impressive martial art technique - naturally Genma had wondered how he could get Ranma to acquire it.

There had been the time he had tied Ranma up quite securely in fish sausages and other kitty treats, then thrown him into a pit of catgirls he'd managed to catch. That hadn't gone well at all. In fact he was hoping that the kitties who had freed Ranma and declared they'd marry him never learned where Ranma was. Though they'd probably forgotten about that by now.

There had been the time he'd tried the same thing with adult catgirls locked in a gymnasium with him throwing Ranma in from a vent in the ceiling. Genma's mind shied away from that recollection, though every time the weather shifted a few of those old injuries still hurt.

Not one attempt to teach Ranma the special technique had worked, but something else HAD occurred. Ranma was terrified of catgirls. Not that he'd grow so frightened that he'd manifest a split personality where he thought he WAS a catgirl. No, he simply got more and more frightened.

Even as his body was reacting to all the rubbing and petting, Ranma fainted.

Which was terribly disappointing to the three daughters Tendo, but was better than some of the potential problems.

* * *

It had long been noted that many Tribals were individuals who was very skilled in the ways of the hunt. This was not so much a talent, but rather a physiological thing, as they had senses that were better than a human being's. Senses like sight, hearing, and taste were simply more acute, and given a chance, the great many materials needed for things like hunting would not be needed.

A good sense of smell was a typical Tribal trait, and it served them well, from letting them track the source of a plumbing problem to allowing them to trail after an escaped prison inmate, if the need should arise. In fact, they could tell a lot of the time who a person was, just by their scent.

And that was something that a particular Tribal was getting at that moment. On the wind was a scent that was as familiar as her own, which let her immediately recognize who it was from. Even though it had been years since she'd last caught a whiff of that particular individual, it was an utterly welcome discovery. For that person was the male that she'd declared would be her future husband, and for a Tribal, that was not a meaningless action, even though it had been so long since she'd done it.

Now, the only question that she had was how she was going to find him.

* * *

Ranma tried not to let the shiver that was trying to run down his back do so. He didn't know if was from the chill of the cooling hot water that had been dumped on him, some instinct that told him that there would be danger going on, or that there were three teenaged catgirls each looking him over from across the table, with an adult one sitting nearby, and only one human on that side of the table. As it was, he didn't want to speculate, since knowing his luck, it could be all three.

"Okay, now that things have calmed down," K'thi asked. "Would someone explain what just happened?"

Genma puffed out his chest, and passed a thoughtful look over each of them. "Well, it is really quite simple. You see..."

"It's all Pop's fault," Ranma interrupted.

"Boy! How could you say something like that?!"

"What? It's the truth!"

"How can you say that?!"

"Simple! I open my mouth and talk!"

K'thi pinned both males with a glare, and waited until they were both merely looking disgruntled before speaking again. "Please, let's try this again. Tell me what's going on."

"Like I said, as far as I'm concerned, it was Pop's fault."

"Hardly boy," his father scoffed. "You see, I took the boy to China, to visit the training grounds there. But at one particular one, a problem of great proportions arose. I did not know that the place was cursed, and we went to train. As a result, when I hit the boy into one of the pools there, he gained a curse! Now, that magic affects him when he gets hit by cold water, and goes back to normal when he gets doused by hot."

"And what _is_ this curse?" Nabiki asked.

"It is nothing too problematic..."

The glare that Ranma gave his father would have cowed another man, but Genma had experience in ignoring things. "For ya! Ta me, it's a pain in the ass! Ya see, I fell in the spring of the 'drowned' cat-toy, though I can't figure out how a cat-toy can 'drown'. So, now every time I get hit by cold water, I smell like catnip!"

"So _that's_ why!" K'thi commented in the tone of one who'd just had a revelation handed to them.

"Yeah, well, it ain't fun for me. And I'm only stuck like this 'cause of a cheap shot."

"'Cheap shot'?"

"Uh-huh. I was doin' just fine, but then the pole I was on started ta splinter right out from under me. It was old, or somethin', so I was put off balance, and _this_ guy goes and makes certain that it breaks. I fall in, and... well, the rest has been a pain in the ass."

"It was a legitimate tactic," his father sniffed.

"Before or after ya shoved me too!"

"Hmmm..." K'thi murmured.

"That _is_ a rather cheap tactic," Akane agreed with a frown. "But it's not quite as bad as..."

"It could be?" Ranma said with a snort. "I'd think so too, if he wasn't constantly doin' things like that.

Genma scowled.

"Every day got some sort of thing to 'get you stronger', like putting me in a school that'd make you fight other students, or tying logs to you and then tossing rocks at a wasps' nest nearby. Even dodging people who thought that you did something wrong was a workout. Mainly 'cause there was so much trouble that ya started."

Four feminine sets of eyes turned to measure a now sweating Genma.

"And that wasn't the worst of it."

"Oh?" K'thi asked.

"For some reason, he wanted me ta learn how ta fight like... one of ya guys. So, he wrapped me up in fish sausage, and that sorta stuff, and tossed me ta a bunch of catgirls who he'd dragged off for that try. When that didn't work out, he tossed me inta a gym full of adult cat Tribal women from the ceiling. And those weren't the only times. All for some stupid desire ta make me fight like a Tribal!"

"Stupid boy!" Genma barked. "Don't you realize that I have worked hard to get you to the level that you are at now?! Just because it made you afraid of catgirls piling on you doesn't mean that I'm in the wrong! So, there were only a few minor mistakes. They don't really matter in the long run! Who cares what small hurts happened so long as my plans for your training still have results!"

Akane might have had a chance to consider Ranma a pervert, but since he hadn't tried to take advantage of her when she'd been behaving as she had earlier, that was out. However, it was clear that he was a rather clueless guy whose father kept on abusing his trust. That was not something that someone like her could handle, as it was not in a Tribal's nature.

Of course, it was just enormously satisfying to smash Genma under the jaw, and sending flying into the backyard.

"Why'd ya do that for?" Ranma asked with a blink.

"He's a mean man, hurting you and all those Tribals. It's unforgivable!"

"I guess..."

"Just watch him try and spout that crap again. He won't get away with it. Humph!"

"Okay..."

Kasumi came over and knelt by Ranma. "Don't worry. Your time of having to live with so many troubles."

"Eh?"

"I'll take care of your every need. No matter what you might happen, I'll make sure that you are well taken care of."

"Ya... will?"

"Absolutely," she told him, and bowed to him.

Nabiki leaned her elbows on the table, and grinned lazily at the others. "This is _so_ interesting. Almost like we have a scene right out a manga. And we even have a great looking male lead."

Seeing Ranma look rather confused, K'thi shook her head and sighed. The poor boy was apparently overwhelmed, but he would simply have to handle it. As it was, her daughters were clearly interested in him, though she wasn't certain in what manner that was yet. Sure, it looked like they found him attractive and appealing, but only Nabiki had said something in that direction. Akane might simply have a desire to protect him, and Kasumi might just want to care for him, both of which could come out of what they were into, as well as their maternal instincts. However, she couldn't be certain of exactly what sort of relationships that they would have for some time yet.

Though, she did have her own urge to go and smack Genma, but she settled for turning her nose up at his prone form.

Eyes widened as something else made its presence known, and K'thi glanced at the boy and her daughters then brought her gaze slowly towards the adult male picking himself up from the back yard.

* * *

They were nearby. Inhuman eyes looking at him. Fangs glittering. Claws ready to tear into his flesh.

"Give him some room, children," said K'thi, watching carefully. She was Tribal, and had senses somewhat more sensitive than was typically human. What she was observing, she wanted confirmed. "So this 'Nekomimiken' training had some... side effects?"

"Ya could say that," said Ranma, twitching and fidgeting.

K'thi watched the way the boy was getting paler and beginning to sweat yet shiver as if cold. "May this one guess that perhaps this training left you... a bit uncomfortable with those of Tribal heritage?"

"Ya could say that," repeated Ranma. Fangs and claws, tugging on him, pulling him. Unsteady and inexperienced, slicing at his ropes and ripping into tender flesh underneath.

K'thi considered the boy. Warrior perhaps, though with some foolish pride that many young showed. Any moment now she expected him to lose nerve and bolt. "I see. It appears you have been exercising a lot recently. We have a furo if you would care to bathe before dinner."

"That's a great idea!" said Ranma, pouncing on the idea of getting away from these girls.

"Oh, well, perrrhaps it would be good to scrrrub yourrr back," purred Kasumi.

"No, I think we should have a meeting, things to schedule," said K'thi, her eyes slits.

Ranma left, trying not to look as if he was retreating. After all, he wasn't scared. Nope not him. Not scared of nothing. Not him.

"That sounds like a good idea, perhaps I should -" began Genma.

"Hsssssssssssssssssssssss," hissed K'thi, snarling in a way that displayed the warrior origin of their race.

"Dearest?" asked Soun, a little surprised at this display.

"YOU!" said K'thi, slitted eyes seeming to glow. "You engaged your son to my daughters and then you gave him a pathological fear of catgirls?!"

"WHAT?!" squeaked three younger girls.

"I saw him, more - I smelled his fear! He was TERRIFIED of my little girls," said K'thi, stalking towards the overweight man. "He covered it as best he could, put up a brave front, but he was frightened nearly to death of my kits!"

"So that's what that was," said Akane, tail and ears drooping. Nobody had ever been scared of her before. Even the idiots at school and that rampaging lunatic Kuno whom she pummelled with her fists of justice had never displayed FEAR to that extent. Though come to think of it, when she'd threatened to break Hiroshi and Daisuke's fingers if they ever tried to grab her like that again - there had been a similar scent. Well, they had cause to be afraid of her - being perverts. Now someone was frightened of her because of something someone else had done? Different kettle of fish altogether.

Three additional sets of glowing slitted eyes looked to Genma.

"Come now, I'm sure my old friend Saotome had a perfectly good reason," said Soun.

"To make his son too afraid of my little kits to ever join the Houses?" asked K'thi, tail lashing.

"SAOTOME! HOW COULD YOU?!" wailed Soun as he realized his wife was perfectly serious.

"I didn't mean to cause any trouble!" Genma protested, holding up his hands to ward off his furious friend. "I just wanted to give my boy every advantage that I could!"

"How is _this_ an advantage?! You made your son too afraid to fulfill the promise!" Soun snapped.

"That wasn't something that I'd planned on. Besides, what does a little fear matter..."

"'A little' would mean that he'd be watching us when we're around," Nabiki corrected. "Mom says that you got him nice and terrified of us, which I think was really proved when he bolted at the first opportunity he was given."

"I'm sure that you have thought hard about this, but I know my son, and if anyone would be aware of the way he thinks, it's me."

"And this means..."

"I have experience with and understanding him, but you do not. You really should leave this to the adults. So, just stay calm and let your parents and me..." the Saotome patriarch began, before a low growl came from elsewhere at the table.

K'thi bared her teeth at him in a way that was most certainly not friendly. "Do _not_ think to tell my daughters what to do. Not only are they _not_ your children, but you've proven to be irresponsible with the one that you do have."

"But I..."

"Will be quiet NOW!" Had the species which had first genengineered the first Tribal been able to see K'thi at the moment - they would have moved their attempt at creating a warrior race from the "fail" to the "rousing success" category.

A small whimper slipped out from the portly man and he tried to look unconcerned, even as he unconsciously braced himself for a strike.

"Since it's not Ranma's fault, and he's apparently in need of help, I can't think of any reason to leave him like this."

"But Mother, what can we do?" Kasumi asked. "You said yourself that he is afraid of us."

"The first thing is to make that not the case anymore. Girls, we'll have to be extra careful around him, especially with that curse. Always treat him as nicely and as calmly as you can."

Akane frowned slightly. "But why wouldn't we do that anyway?"

"I'm not talking about simply saying 'hello'. We're going to have to tread very softly around him. Getting excited would spook him, no matter if we're happy or angry."

"He'd always be afraid that it'd be that we're getting angry, right?"

"Pretty much. Which means that we'll have to make it so that he'll be safe and comfortable, with positive models of what our type of Tribals can be like. Basically, we'll have to make him feel strong, and see us as only wanting to be friendly. He's going to be skittish, but hopefully, if we can get him to trust us, he'll relax, and at least we'll have made it so that he'll be able to see us as people, not creatures to be afraid of."

"And then the promise can go forward!" Genma declared.

"It might! But there is no guarantee that even if he'd get past any fear enough to feel at ease that he'd want to be with one of _my_ daughters."

"Oh, that sounds good. I understand."

"I rather doubt that you have the ability to do so," Nabiki muttered.

"Huh?"

"Exactly."

"In any case, we'll have to work on making it so that he can have a friendly and loving environment, so that he will be able to loose all that fear that he was forced into," K'thi commented.

* * *

Genma scowled at the thought of his boy being coddled. He knew that it was the boy's fault for developing this irrational behavior. He knew his boy had let him down in this, and the means to overcome this problem was to confront it head on. Apparently, women being irrational as they were, they had transferred the blame to HIM and were averse to his approach in some matters.

The three Tendo daughters went to change, as apparently this was all a bit much and a formal atmosphere was not required at the moment.

Kasumi, ever the dutiful maid, wondered if she should go through young Ranma's backpack. He might have some clothes that needed laundering. Yes, that might be a good idea. Set out his futon and such while she was at it.

Nabiki pondered her various costumes and clothing choices and decided to go with a simple outfit. The plugsuit might cause him to go running off, after all. Most of her costumes were meant to look sexy or cute, and that was probably pushing it with the young man in question. Maybe... ah. Perfect. The basic start to many cosplay outfits - the school uniform.

Akane, Chinese Amazon otaku, didn't bother thinking about outfits. She was going to try and be as nonthreatening as she could, which meant her usual sort of clothing was perfectly all right.

K'thi returned her attention to dinner.

Soun was Genma's dear old friend, even if he had buried Genma and this was a duplicate Genma. A shogi board, some nicely heated sake, and cheating like a maniac - a perfect way to wind down the day.

Ranma, letting cold water wash over him before he relaxed in the soaking tub, tried not to think about what it would be like to live in a house with four tribals. Three of whom he might be engaged to. They seemed nice, when his rational mind could squash down the emotional responses enough to think about it clearly. Which wasn't easy when they were right in his face like that.

Unfortunately, the peace of the afternoon was broken by the sound of idiocy.

* * *

Bathing was something that Ranma had always liked to do. Sure, it wasn't always with the most modern conditions, but he was usually reasonably pleased by whatever he could get. There really wasn't anything like being able to wash off the grime of a workout in even a metal drum of water, and he loved the chances that he got to swim in the cool waters of a lake on a really hot day.

But nothing could ease one's nerves like being able to soak in a furo. All the stress could just wash away, leaving his body feeling totally at ease. In here, he could enjoy the opportunity to rest and let himself let the stress of what he'd just been through just flow out of him.

"Come now and wear the only clothing that is proper for your most honored position!" bellowed a male voice that he'd never heard before as some guy in a hakama burst into the room. "It is time to let yourself embrace the freedom to become mine! The time is now, Akane Tendo... You are not Akane Tendo."

"Not the last time that I checked..." Ranma blurted, staring wildly at the sight of the guy holding a leash with a collar attached.

"But she was supposed to be in here. My ninja told me that the clothing in the basket was Chinese in style."

"I wear Chinese stuff."

"I see... Even if that is so, how can you feel so free as to use the bathing facilities of the fair Akane's family?!"

"'Cause they said that I could."

"Why would they let some strange knave come in without previous meetings. Nay, I say that you are really a fiend who wants to assault my lovely pet in a most heinous and perverted way!"

"You what?!" the pigtailed boy yelped.

"This can not be forgiven! Have at you!"

Ranma leapt out of the water, and out of the way of the strike, which incidentally managed to slice a bit into the edge of the tub. But he wasn't about to worry about that at the moment, as he used the wall as a springboard as he bounced off of it, so that he could use both feet to kick into the elder boy's chest. Doing so worked better than he could have hoped, as it not only sent the attacker flying backwards, but sent him smashing through the door, and into the wall behind it, with Ranma on him for the entire time. After the boy landed, Ranma stood up and looked down at him, thoroughly confused.

"What the heck's going on around here?" Nabiki asked as she came up to the scene.

"I don't know. I was in the bath, and he attacked, and... It was just a bit too weird."

"Is that so? Sounds like it."

"It was. But who _is_ this guy?"

"Tatewaki Kuno, a..."

"A jerk and an idiot. And that is on his good days," Akane muttered, looking down at the boy in question in disgust as she came up to them. "He thinks that I should be his pet, I don't agree, and he assumes that I'm just putting up a fake protest."

"Oh, was _that_ why he had the leash?" Ranma asked.

"A leash?

"Said it was the only clothing that be 'proper', or somethin' like that."

"Why that pervert!" the youngest Tendo snapped as she gave a small kick to Kuno's side before looking over to Ranma with gratitude in her eyes... and letting her jaw drop.

Kasumi frowned as she came upon the scene. "Oh my... Looks like Kuno has come to visit again. He always makes such a mess. Did he bother you in the bath, Ranma... Oh MY..." "He did."

"Well, don't worry. I'll be taking the garbage out anyway," the eldest Tendo daughter commented as she grabbed the older boy by one foot and dragged him away, blushing deeply the entire time.

"Is something the matter?"

"If you're talking about my daughter's reaction, it might have something to do with the fact that you have no clothes on," K'thi commented as she walked up to the teenagers. "Why are you standing naked in front of my daughters?"

With the adrenaline rush over with, and his mind turning to more immediate concerns, Ranma was able to confirm what she told him. Slapping his hands over his crotch, he yelped and ran back into the furo room.

"I don't think that he remembered that he was naked until then," Nabiki commented.

Her mother scowled at her. "Why didn't you tell him then?"

"I was enjoying the view. And surprised to hear him squeak like that when he realized he was naked."

"What about you, Akane? Why didn't you... Akane?"

"Hmm..." Nabiki waved a hand in front of her younger sister's face. "Looks like she burned out a synapse or two."

"Oh?"

"Hey, she had to not only deal with Kuno attacking someone in our furo when he was after her, but got the chance to see an attractive male in the buff. Since it wasn't his fault, she likely was stuck with nothing to do but enjoy it."

"And you think that has just left her standing there frozen?"

"Well, she has a bit of a problem. Either she's been spending too much time on the martial arts aspect of the Chinese Amazons, or she's already planning out what will happen when she challenges him for his hand... and his other parts."

"I'm not a pervert!" Akane snapped, with her head whipping around to face her sister.

"Didn't say that you were."

"Nabiki..."

"We do need to do some things..."

"Grr..."

"I really need to be able to put on some clothes!" Ranma complained from the furo, drawing sighs, for different reasons from the daughters than the mother.

* * *

If one were to compare the more commonly encountered Akane Tendo to the member of the Nekomimi Tribe, there would be some significant differences.

Akane went to her room and inspected her figure, not exactly a tower of self-confidence but appraising herself honestly. She knew she was a little less chesty than her two sisters, but she was pretty taut and lithe and not exactly lacking in that regard herself. She liked putting a little decorative band on her tail, compared to the bow Kasumi favored or the various accessories Nabiki used.

Her claws were trimmed back, that way she didn't puncture her own palm when making a fist, and her right ear had three simple unadorned earrings evenly spaced below the point. Which, if you were up on Tribal lore, meant that she had gone through one of the Tribal rites and was now a full member of the Nekomimi tribe and no longer considered a kit.

She smiled and rummaged around in her top dresser drawer to pull out a collar. Japanese humans had a lot of rituals and so did Nekomimi. Kuno, being an idiot, kept trying to put a dog collar on her. This was a more proper Nekomimi collar, a flexible soft band that nonetheless had some armor value - protecting the soft area of the neck. It ALSO denoted her as "claimed" - well, maybe eventually. Originally with the Tribals it had been a piece of armor.

It wasn't like she hated boys after all. Some were definitely idiots, and some had an affliction that her mother had explained to her. Human males apparently hit puberty and a large number of them suddenly had such unhealthy levels of sex-related hormones running through their system that rational thought shut down at times. Unless the individuals were truly obnoxious, Akane had a certain degree of pity for them. It wouldn't keep her from pounding them off into oblivion if they pressed too far, but if they kept their distance it was just a sad thing that their minds were frequently shut down like that.

Not that human girls or Tribal boys were entirely free of that effect. Or, for that matter, Tribal girls. They might not talk about it - but there were certain periods where hormones and urges ran high and other times it was relatively low.

Akane blushed as her fingers twiddled with the collar. THAT boy, her fiancee, had set off a rush of sensations within her.

Yet she was a Chinese Amazon otaku, and she knew the Laws, and while she wanted to gauge her strength and skill against someone who'd apparently practiced the fighting arts for a long time - there was the disadvantage his fear put him under plus the potential consequences.

Sighing and shaking her head at the odd situation, Akane realized she probably could set him straight about just some friendly sparring and that would cover THAT end of things. With this stupid phobia though - she wouldn't be able to see that full potential if he was fighting her or any other Tribal.

Life could be just SO unfair at times.

* * *

A blush was something that Kasumi was never afraid to show on her face, but even she knew that it was a bit much to feel the heat of one on her face as she took care of her work. However, considering what she'd just seen, that wasn't something that she could not explain. After all, she had never been one of those girls who'd been free with their affections, and certainly hadn't been faced with that sort of thing before.

Not that she could blame poor Ranma-chan for what had happened. The dear boy probably hadn't even thought that something like that would happen, never mind that he was doing it at that moment. Sure, he'd been giving her a full view of himself, but it had been such a _nice_ view...

Stopping on her way out the door, she tucked her hands in near her chin, blushing and giggling at the same time. Thinking that way was ever so naughty, and it actually felt pretty good. If she were going to be honest, she was going to have to admit that she hadn't minded that sight as much as she thought that she might have at another time. That had been rather pleasant, and she did like the boy.

Right from the beginning, she'd recognized him as someone that she could take care of. It fit in the whole idea of being a maid, as there were jobs that had the maid being the main support for the 'master'. He was one of those people who could use so much in the way of help, and would do well with a girl who could make a comfortable home for him to stay in. And she knew that she was of the sort of Tribal who could enjoy such things.

Nesting was something that many Tribals went through, especially pregnant females. When it got close to the time when they would give birth, they would want to arrange their home furnishings to their satisfaction. That usually meant a lot of work for their mates, but it was one of those things publically grumbled about, but was privately treated tenderly.

She was one of those who tended to do it all the time. People told her that she would be a good mother all the time, and she'd always been fairly concerned about taking care of people. Some of those who knew about her maid focus thought that such emotions were the cause, and that might have been part of it.

It was the fact that she thought that she looked cute in the uniforms that had first started her in thinking in that direction. There were all sorts of maid outfits in her wardrobe now, from ones that were rather practical, some that could double as evening wear, and even a few that Nabiki had found for her. No matter the task, she'd be dressed for it, even if that was only part of being a maid for her now.

Yet, for a girl to be truly a maid, she needed to have someone to be her 'master'. A growing part of her wondered if this boy would be the one that would fill that position. He did need someone to care for him better than that nasty old father of his had, and she considered him to be be a very nice person. His body was certainly up to the task, and she found herself coming up with a very vivid image when she considered what it would be like to 'serve' him in that one maid's 'uniform'.

Thinking in that direction resulted in a rather giddy feeling that made her want to go inside and spend a moment alone. Feeling a bit embarrassed about it, she simply tossed the garbage onto the pile, and hurried back outside.

Of course, Kuno was too unconscious to realize that he'd be fairly bruised from smacking into the other refuse.

* * *

The situation as it stood wasn't exactly what Genma had in mind when he had been thinking of what would happen when he would bring his son to meet Tendo's daughters. According to what he'd been considering, it had been a rather simple situation. His son would take one look at the daughters, add his desire for them to his loyalty and deference to his father, and would follow through with the engagement immediately. Then they would set upon creating the continuation of the family lines.

As it stood right then, he had angry catgirls who were mad at him for his son being afraid of them. They were planning on coddling his boy to get him over that silly phobia, and were apparently intent on keeping him from doing the job that he'd been doing well with for the last ten years. There had been some... hiccups, but things had been going along well enough up until then, in his opinion.

He was going to have to do something to prevent things from going out of control. It would be good for those girls to make his son comfortable with them, since they were his possible wives, but they could make his boy soft, and he couldn't have that. So he was going to have to work hard to prevent it. The boy would thank him for it, as he knew that his son liked the idea of being strong. That would mean that he'd have to be rough on him, but that was what happened when one practiced the Art. 'Ease' went out the window in exchange for work.

With his plan in place, he settled on getting started with it after he enjoyed his game of shogi with Tendo.

* * *

Nabiki tapped her fingers against her desk and considered the situation at hand. Despite being a manga-phile, she was also a realist, and she didn't let her emotions run ragged as they did for some. The idea of losing herself, and doing something that she would be sorry for later was something that she tended to want to avoid. And at this moment, she didn't want to risk that happening at all.

Spotting a likely choice, she pulled out the manga volume, and hoped that Ranma liked it as much as she did.

Had she been another 'Nabiki', she might have seen things in a more 'risk-reward' oriented sense, but here she knew something about instincts. To a Tribal, instincts were something to pay attention to, and if one got a feeling that one could not explain, it was considered to be a good idea to try and figure out what it was. Sometimes, it could be a big help, especially if it warned one about a situation.

And right then, her instincts were warning her that things were not going to be easily solved. She knew that she would not trust that barrel bodied idiot of a father, and she sure knew that she liked his son. Ranma certainly had the body, and she knew that he could be well equipped to follow out what she had seen in those adult mangas that she hid away from casual sight.

Still, she knew that things would need to be taken quite calmly, as she didn't want to mess anything up. If nothing else, he was _fun_, and he didn't seem to be the usual stick in the mud sort. The idea of dressing up as a couple from one of the series that she liked did have some appeal, and she wondered what he would look like in a tuxedo.

But she didn't take his participation in anything that she wanted to do to be automatically given. After all, he was barely able to stay in the same room as her without bolting. So, even if she was certain that she would enjoy being with him, she wasn't stupid enough to think that it would come automatically. What he would need would be the 'voice of reason', and she knew that she could supply it for him. From there, they might get close, and she did have to admit that cuddling with him wouldn't be such a bad thing.

Of course, she was also sure that she was going to have to make sure that nothing else messed things up. Hopefully, she could get a level of trust going, and he could actually learn ways to get past his fears to be able to handle a long conversation, among other things. Being a realist, she knew that even if they got him to trust her and her sisters, that sort of calm might not extend to other feline Tribals. However, even that much would be a welcome, and helpful, change from the current situation.

Perhaps lending him this manga would help, as it would give them something to enjoy together. Smiling despite her thought that it would be better to keep things neutral for the time being, she headed out of her room.

* * *

Ranma got dressed and wondered why his life was so complicated. He put on his usual clothing, he favored the Chinese clothing because it dried quickly and didn't stick to him quite as badly as other clothes did. Ever since Jusenkyo, he'd seemed to get splashed frequently.

"Well, they seem kinda nice," muttered Ranma, trying to find some good in this situation. Also scary, but he wasn't going to say THAT.

The village had been spooky. Then there were those gals he kept running into at odd times.

At least he'd left those problems behind.

* * *

She was of the Joketsuzoku, the Nichieju. A village of warrior women who had some really bizarre customs and laws that had been discovered by the Tribals and the usual mingling had taken place.

As a result of the Tribals, considerably more people knew of them at this point. There were even Chinese Amazon fanclubs and otaku. There were those who adopted some of the Nichieju lifestyle, and therefore you could find Japanese Nichieju, American Nichieju, Canadian Nichieju, German Nichieju, and so on.

Which was why a girl named Shampoo was rubbing the bump on the back of her head and saying something in Chinese that was not at all complimentary about news programs that missed certain important details.

She had had NO idea that guys outside the village were so desperately single that she could barely stop in one area before someone tried a sneak attack to defeat her and gain a bride.

She'd had to chase down the first Chinese Amazon she'd seen (who turned out to be a wolfgirl from Korea) in order to find out that the news report had shown that a Chinese Amazon wearing a flower in her hair was exempt from challenges. This was yet another rumor about her village that she had NO idea where it had come from. That didn't keep her from raiding florist shops on a regular basis, and fortunately that had decreased the number of ambushes.

And the martial arts styles! What kind of deranged mind came up with Porn Shop Attendent Martial Arts?! Admittedly she could see where avoiding groping hands probably DID increase one's avoidance skills, but still - you had to draw the line somewhere.

And those bozos. What did they call that? Oh yeah. Mariachi Band Martial Arts Style. The guy with the castanets had been easy to defeat, but the one with the guitar had managed to 'ka-bong' her quite good. She'd pointed out that she had a flower in her hair, and that attacking as a group was not permitted. She'd pointed this out as she was pounding the heck out of them with that guitar too.

"I'll find you yet, Ranma Saotome," promised Shampoo, the human girl of the Nichieju village.

She was the 'real deal' in a world of otaku. The Tribals had found her people shortly after coming to Earth, and many of them had embraced her people's way of life. However, there was a major difference between her, and them, and that wasn't simply a species issue. Shampoo had been born as a human, and had been the latest in the long lineage of her people, but she had something new to deal with.

The problem that had come up was simple, and yet took in a rather strange set of assumptions. Guys saw the instinctual ability of the Tribals to find mates that they'd desire, put it together with the Amazon code of conduct with outsiders, and had come up with the idea that if one could only take an Amazon for one's self, then one could 'keep' her. It was the sort of idiocy that only really found a place to be talked about in boys' locker rooms, but it did flourish among the hormonal until they learned the truth. But, in the mean time, some boys had taken the information that the 'Chinese Amazon' way of life was not a stereotype taken from kung fu flicks, and came from a real way of life, and had realized that if the law governed _all_ Chinese Amazons, then they could get themselves some sexy _human_ girls. The idea of collaring some exotic warrior woman did have its own appeal, especially when guys decided that this would mean that the Amazon in question would buckle down, become a dutiful companion who was submissive to her man, and would fight for him as he needed it. And their dreams of what such a vibrant and physically fit young woman would do were quite... hot and sweaty.

If there was one odd thing about dealing with groups of people, it was the fact that people would see them in their own contexts, and that led to some strange ideas. Some girls would take in images of male pop singers, and imagine that the young man in question was singing to them. Many boys would look at a woman in uniform, and fetishize them into tightly clad take charge babes. Not all people would have the same ideas, but there was a habit of looking to a sort of group of people, and romanticizing so that they would seem to be appealing. Individuals would even do it to time periods, which resulted in eras of confusion, fear, and repression being seen as a time of family dinners and tract homes.

In this case, they left out something rather important, which was... reality. Many of the guys who considered Amazons to be 'passionate bedmates just waiting to be caught' didn't really check the full picture. The truth was that Amazons tended to 'rule the roost', so to speak, and were very in control of their own lives. If they did defer, or submit to their male companions, it was because of a personal desire to do so, but their culture didn't have an 'automatically affectionate' clause in their laws on the 'losing to an Outsider' situation.

That meant that they hadn't realized that Shampoo was not about to loose her annoyance with them even if she'd been beaten. Even a Tribal didn't just fall into a relationship with anyone without a reason, as it was necessary for their to be something to base the desire to be a couple on. As it was, the marriage laws were only a guarantee of getting an Amazon into the bonds of matrimony, not a sure bet that the relationship would work out well.

Shampoo knew all about that, as she was perfectly aware of what went on with that sort of situation. It was part of her people's culture, and they had experiences both with marriages to Outsiders proving to be frustrating for both parties, and wedded bliss for the happy couple. To her, it was just really dumb for the guys to try and blindly get some stranger for a relationship that, in all likelihood, would never work out.

About the only pleasant thing about the whole deal was the fact that it had demonstrated that she had 'the goods', so that guys had liked what they'd seen when they'd went after her.

Still, she had more important things to worry about than hormonal idiots who she had to bash every few minutes. Somewhere out there was Ranma Saotome, who'd visited her village on his training journey with his father. That was a simple enough idea, as the arrival of the Tribals had opened up her homeland to outside visitation. Yet, he was different, as there was definitely a reason for her to leave the relative calm of her village for the frequently problematic 'outside world' to search for him.

Somewhere out there was that particular pigtailed boy, and she would find him. There was no other way for her to succeed, and she was not the sort of person who simple accepted failure. No matter what sort of trouble she'd have to face, she'd find him.

* * *

Things had NOT gone as they might have.

Ranma's curse did NOT involve turning into a girl. Genma was still prone to eating a lot, as was Ranma. The First Prize feast was devoured, there was a challenge, Shampoo was defeated.

Therefore, no Kiss Of Death. Not that that wasn't without problems anyway.

All the press, the occasional tourist (they were even listed by Fyodor's Guides and the Tribal Channel did sporadic specials, though this year they hadn't done the live coverage of the annual Tournament due to problems that had occurred with LAST year's live coverage) and the little hidden valley was not so hidden anymore.

Even the Kiss Of Marriage had been watered down some, because every so often an Outsider would show up specifically to take part in the Tournament.

Cologne was an old irascible and sometimes very manipulative old woman, but her main concern was what was good for her village and people. After seeing some of the more impressive Outsiders fight, and aware that her village could profit in all sorts of ways (not simply monetarily), she negotiated things to keep her village off-limits except on specific times. After all, as she pointed out, by limiting access to the village in this way - the tour guides could charge more.

Entering Nichieju had been Genma and Ranma during one of those times. Everyone had seen the claiming of the First Prize as a challenge, throwing down the gauntlet. As this was NOT unknown anymore, they were waiting to see if this was going to be another Dan Hibiki (more bluster than fight) or another Ken Masters. Hopefully it would NOT be another Gouki - that had been a debacle nobody at all wanted to see, and had seen an addendum added to the Big Book Of Amazon Law so that one did not have to give the Kiss Of Marriage to sociopaths.

Curiously, a set of Tribals there to film things for the Tribal Channel ended up recording the events - then throwing their equipment to the side as they gave chase to the would-be groom-candidate (a cool down period having been added in Section XIII C) and ending up with Ranma Saotome being chased entirely out of the valley.

It was most vexing, and the various Tribals apparently had no idea at all why they had done such a thing.

"Excuse me, where is Furinkan High School?"

Shampoo rolled her eyes and looked over at the boy in the bandana, blinking as she realized that this was not simply another silly Outsider boy. "Aiyah! Is Ryoga Hibiki, yes? How is Doo Wop? Not heard from her since you defeat her two year ago."

"'Doo Wop'?" the boy in the bandana parroted in momentary confusion. Just the idea that a girl might want to come and talk to him was a surprise, and to have be cute as well was enough to throw him somewhat. However, he was able to quickly collect himself enough to pick up on some things about her. With her _really_ shapely body contained in that sort of outfit, she was obviously following the traditional ways, but as he started to recognize her style, memories started coming back to him.

And Ryoga realized that he was going to have to deal with some issues right about then. Not that he'd planned on such a situation to be in his future, but there had been that trip to Okinawa when he was younger, and despite the fact that he got to actually go on a school trip, things weren't going to stay that way. Due to a mistake in identifying a tramp hauler with the ferry that he was supposed to take, he had wound up getting so lost that he'd wound up travelling in the _opposite_ direction from his homeland.

Then it had been a case of stumbling, in both action and word, that had, in the end, resulted in him in a village with a matriarchy that had been around for years. Being around that sort of place had left him rather confused, and it took him a while to get familiar enough with the situation. Of course the strangest part of it all was that by the time that he'd finally managed to get out of there, he'd wound up with a girl who was his wife by local laws.

"Am I back in China?!" he blurted as he realized that he wasn't about to be able continue going as he already was.

"No, that not the case. You is in Japan," the Amazon told him. "Shampoo just come to island country on Shampoo own business."

"You have your own company?"

"No! Where get silly idea like that? Shampoo only here because man she looking for is this country."

The Lost Boy looked back at her, and frowned for just a minute. He knew what it was like to be chased after by an Amazon, he wondered just what that would mean. However, he also had to worry about the possibility that she might want to help her fellow villager, which would be worrisome. There were things beyond asking for directions to Furinkan High School that he wanted to do, and getting into an embarrassing position right then was not something that she was aiming for. So, he concentrated on what they could do, hoping for the best.

As it was, he was in the middle of trying to find Furinkan High School.

* * *

_Prime:_

"There," said the Raven. "Much better, don't you think?"

"How is this better?!" demanded Ranma. "They're... those things!"

"Catgirls?" asked the Raven. "Not your cuppa tea, eh?"

"Hell no!" said Ranma.

"Hmmm," hmmmed the Raven. "Well, then. Maybe..."


	7. Chapter 7: New gods

_Prime:_

"There," said the Raven. "Much better, don't you think?"

"How is this better?!" demanded Ranma. "They're... those things!"

"Catgirls?" asked the Raven. "Not your cuppa tea, eh?"

"Hell no!" said Ranma.

"Hmmm," hmmmed the Raven. "Well, then. Maybe..."

"What about that one?" asked Ranma, as he noticed one globe in the fields was off by itself.

"Oh, I didn't do that one," said Raven.

"Well, that's the one I want to see then," said Ranma.

* * *

Son of Omake  
chapter 7: new gods on the block

by myself and Kender_Sci

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes.

* * *

_Abyss:_

She was the dark goddess Lolth. The spider queen, the goddess of the drow.

She was in the form of a spider the size of a mountain and was currently hurrying along a strand of the DemonWeb Pits as she felt something twist and shake those strands of cable.

Considering the thickness and strength of the strands of the webbing that made up that layer - no mortal creature was likely to be responsible. That meant an intruder here where her power was the strongest.

Fully confident in her power, Lolth shot forward towards the bright spark she sensed turning to flee. One last task to do as she had made all the preparations for her to vanish from the Prime Material to rebirth herself meaner and leaner.

Only to feel something ripping apart her essence - a stabbing blow that rent deep into her carapace.

Cyric twisted his blade deep, feeling there was room for only one god of treachery and intrigue and murder. That would be HIM!

Lolth was quickly sealed away using the mechanisms he'd purloined.

Then Cyric sat back in amusement. He'd done it. He'd used his talents to steal back his rightful portfolio. Lolth was dead, at least in this branching of the Prime Material. Now he could take the prize, betraying the gods of evil that he'd allied with for this end, and-

Where was it?

The segment of the portfolio that was all drow was missing. The precious fragment of godstuff that would have made him the god of an entire race that he could have used to such good effect. WHO COULD HAVE TAKEN IT?!

A little black cat, some sort of mouse (or was it a spider?) in his mouth, pranced along a strand of webbing.

Now who, wondered the cat, would be a good god of the drow? Now if there was ever a bunch of no-fun people who needed a good stirring up - it was the drow elves.

Flicking from universe to universe as easily as cleaning a whisker, the cat decided to make the new god of the drow. Ah. Him. Perfect.

* * *

_Prime Material:_

Ranma was still falling when he stopped in midair and began glowing brightly.

He flashed and flared, especially at points on his forehead and the crests of both cheeks.

Finally the glow stopped and he lowered himself to the ground.

"Whoaaaaa," said Ranma - and vanished.

The newly pandafied Genma looked around in astonishment. When had Ranma learned such an impressive manuever. And why did he feel furry?

"Many tragic stories here, Mister Customer, but that one I no hear of before now." The Guide turned the panda back into a human with a splash of hot water. "Not have any idea what go on here. Do you?"

* * *

With the priestesses no longer receiving spells, things would eventually become very different. The clergy of Lolth controlled all aspects of their civilization and kept the infighting among the Houses from getting out of hand.

The weak were culled, as were the diseased or cursed. Only the strongest and most ruthless, the cleverest and the cruelest, could thrive in the cities of the drow.

There were those who failed those tests. Some became drider, their bodies and minds twisted into shapes that would help to "test" unwary drow and keep them strong - as well as being a lesson of what happened to any with less than perfect loyalty to the spider-goddess. There were those who were taken as 'battle captive' and geased with powerful spells to be the slaves of the more favored. There were still others who successfully fled the Underdark for other parts, and found other divine patronage. These were rare, very rare, and their tales were not spread where others might gain heart from them.

Still others were outcast from their House and lived lives much like those teeming throngs of slaves and the hangers-on of the cities, their slums providing more amusement for the cruel masters who had not fallen from grace.

Finally there were those who were used in other manners, such as those who found themselves in the Arena.

Dirai was of no House, and of less than noble birth. She had been the child of a soldier of low social standing attached to House Svithrae. Svithrae had slowly built up some trade and developed some goodwill with trade partners in the Underdark, reasoning that it was in their best interests to offer something the bigger cartels wouldn't - fair dealing with the lesser races. When they began to generate greater profit and get better deals, the inevitable occurred. Two of the more affluent Houses manufactured a scandal and slew the matrons of the House, divvied up the wealth, and killed or enslaved the remainder. Life as usual among the drow.

Dirai, known in Chad Nespair as Dirai The Blade, was doing something that amused a number of cellmates. Praying, and not to Lolth.

That was okay amongst them - though forbidden by their jailors. They were a group of misfits, any hour might see them thrown into the Arena and slain for the amusement of the higher ups. They were Arena slaves, and any abuse could be thrown upon them and they had no say in it.

The others were amused because none of them knew the names of other gods to call upon them. Oh - there were whispers of Vhaeraun, who was Lolth's sometimes bed-mate. There were the gods of the various other slave races, but speak them aloud and at the very least your tongue might be cut out.

Dirai had recently gotten a nasty wound along one side and the priestesses had not bothered to heal it completely. As it would slow her down in the next match, it would likely kill her through that indirect means. Hence turning to prayer.

"I direct my plea to any god or goddess that might help me and my sisters to win free from this life, send us a sign that we may gain hope from it," said Dirai, kneeling on the cold stone floor.

_thump!_

A young human boy appeared in the center of the cell, scratching his head and peering around in what to him was nearly total darkness. Then, while thinking about it, he realized how he could adjust his eyes to see like the elves around him.

"Someone answered?" asked one of the astonished cellmates.

"That can't be," said another, though lowly so as not to attract the priestesses and their damn serpent-flails. "There are wards and protections against any teleportations within these walls."

Dirai swallowed nervously and approached the boy, her red eyes gleaming in the darkness. A human boy? Was this the messenger of a human god or some cruel prank of the priestesses?

The boy looked into her eyes, and Saw her.

He saw the young girl whose parents had been slain in front of her. He saw the girl trained to be a warrior and fight in the Arena against horrific monsters and other slaves. He saw her raped, beaten, raped again by male and female and monster and -

There was pain there, and while he was not very powerful at present, he could do a little now. Lord Ao had proclaimed that one's power was dependent on the number of worshippers, but he could accomplish a little at present.

"I can do this little for you," said Ranma, reaching out to the kneeling girl and touching her forehead. He thought he could do this at least, and he was the sort to do things as opposed to thinking them out beforehand. For now at least. "Be Healed."

The wound closed. Tissues reknit. The horrors of the past receeded within her mind.

Dirai blinked now blue eyes as she felt fresh strength flow into her. Strength and a purpose. "Hide him! He is our one chance out of here!"

Not all of the others were as ready to turn their backs on their heritage or culture, but all were heartily sick of being the lowest of the low. They hid him as the priestesses, agitated by something, marched past the barred wall of their cell.

"What is he?" asked one of the others after the priestesses had passed by.

"A newly forged god, I think," said Dirai. "A new Time Of Troubles or something else, I do not know. Yet I have some clerical spells now, and I can heal your wounds Iranae."

Iranae's eyes narrowed as she considered all the angles. Though by nature she was more like one of her captors than Dirai, she realized that here was a great opportunity. "Your eyes changed color, they are now the shade of bright sapphires. Are you taller now?"

"The mark of favor," said Dirai with confidence. "My prayers were answered by Wild Stallion, and as he grows stronger, so too may his priestesses."

Iranae looked first to the taller, blue-eyed, Dirai then to the tired looking boy. It was said that the strength of the worshippers gave strength to the gods they worshipped, which was why Lolth wanted only the strongest drow to survive.

"Not much of a god yet if just healing you, teleporting through all the wards against it, and investing you as a member of his faith tired him out," pointed out Iranae.

She was more cold and calculating than Dirai, and she quickly added things up. If this human was in fact a new god, much like that Cyric fellow she'd heard about, then this was a risk and an opportunity.

Oh, she could turn the boy in - the priestesses would rip his heart out and feed it to a draegloth or something to regain the favor of the Spider Queen. If it didn't work they'd go on to something else maybe.

On the other hand, if this boy was on his way to becoming a deity - and one that clearly accepted a ditzy naive girl like Dirai as a high priestess. Well, she wasn't willing to switch faiths or philosophies at least by much - but being an interested hanger on would allow her to reap benefits. She could always betray them later if there was more profit to it.

"Count me in," said Iranae out loud. "A chance of getting out of these damn pits strikes me as better than no chance at all."

* * *

The society of the drow was run by the clergy of Lolth. The clergy was run by the most vicious and sadistic of their ranks, as well as the oldest and most accomplished.

They had scrolls and magical items, which allowed them to cover for their loss of spells - for now. It was only a matter of time before the word got out. They were not going to admit their current lack of resources and lessening power, at least if it could be avoided.

Still, old wounds festered. Slights and petty feuds were ready to erupt into full scale warfare. The eye of the goddess was not on them - and so there were many who thought this the perfect opportunity to advance their own quests for power or vengeance.

"Never Trust A Drow." While this was not true in certain individuals, it was certainly the case in the majority. A drow's word was good - up until the point honoring that word was inconvenient or potentially harmful.

The minor city of Chad Nespair was not quite as bad off as some of the other cities. It was simply a matter of size. Chad Nasad was a major tradesport. The capital of Menzonobarrenzen was huge and had the individuals who had risen to the heights of their profession.

Chad Nespair by contrast had roughly 1/6 the population of Chad Nasad. The higher echelons were not nearly as competent or vicious as those in larger cities. If you wanted to borrow human terms, you might describe it as 'Hicksville' or a 'backwoods hamlet' by contrast.

This carried some benefits and problems. If one wanted to strike back at the drow, one usually thought of other cities. The wealth wasn't there - being mainly off as tribute to other cities, and the place was off the beaten path - even as regarded the traffic of the Underdark and the chasms and tunnels that were used for travel.

A lake of water that trickled down from the World Above surrounded three quarters of Chad Nespair, and large thick walls blocked the last quarter except for the two gates. Problems with duergar and the occasional illithid had caused those walls to be erected and maintained.

Chad Nespair had no tower of Sorcere. There were a few mages, but they too were hardly the ones who held the reins of true power or ambition. If they had ambition and power - they wouldn't be here.

With a few exceptions - people who'd rather be skilled and powerful in a minor city rather than be average in a major city.

Pentas Vourl was one such. In a major drow city, one with a tower of Sorcere or similarly powerful group of mages, he might have been able to rise to the ranks of the ruling council. He had the power but not the subtlety nor the innate cleverness to reach further. Whereas in Chad Nespair - he was the most powerful mage in the city.

After the first day, he knew _something_ was up. The priestesses were as tight-lipped as ever, but they had spent four hours in session with doors closed during the later part of the day.

Matron Kavriel missing her mid-afternoon Reverie and meal - something BIG was up. Matron Acherea had been seen scurrying to the temple despite one of her caravans being due today - completely out of character.

He knew, liked was not even vaguely applicable, most of the Matrons of the city and their habits. The best to avoid them and their attention for one thing.

Pentas Vourl looked out over his city and wondered what it meant as he prepared and cast a few minor spells. As he had expected, most struck anti-eavesdropping wards and barriers.

To his delight and surprise, one got through. Clairaudience cast on a point where the walls of the chamber were not thick, and a storeroom that was crowded with odd supplies was a good place to spy from. Especially if one didn't have to be physically present.

Pentas heard the arguments, though not all the voices could be heard. Lolth had turned her back on them? The Spider Goddess was not answering their sacrifices and pleas?

That brought a brief smile to Pentas' face. Until he heard his own name mentioned. They hadn't sacrificed sufficiently and maybe a mage would make a better sacrifice?

Pentas Vourl mentally drew a circle around the name of Matron Kavriel. She had just gone to the top of the payback list.

Being a mage, he didn't rely on a being as fickle as the drow goddess to cast spells. Pentas quickly gathered the ingredients for a spell.

Pentas sent the word out. He used Whispering Wind to a few well known ears, then spread it among a few others by means of the Magic Mouth spell and a courier service.

The lesser races, the thralls and slaves, couldn't be permitted to know about this. However, as Pentas well knew, they'd find out eventually if the goddess continued to spurn her followers. When that knowledge became public, there might be trouble from that quarter. Until then he knew a lot of men like himself who'd suffered for centuries from the matriarchy. He'd known promising wizards knived in the back by scheming sisters or mothers, or ended up dying over days on an altar.

Then, messages sent, he could just sit back and watch the show. Much better than taking direct action himself.

* * *

There were six of them. Six disciples to a new faith. Six warriors who had been used for sport in the arena, passed around as toys for the amusement of higher caste drow, and generally leading unhappy lives.

Dirai directed a healing spell into the injured leg of Iranae and didn't notice the crafty look in her patient's eyes.

**Dirai The Blade** who was a specialist in using twin short swords. Now standing taller and stronger, with her eyes blazing the blue of sapphires. She still seemed a little "not there" and was entirely too soft (by the standards of the other drow) to be a leader. Yet, apparently, now she was.

**Iranae The Chain** was the sort of exotic-weapon user that the Arena liked to put out. Cruel, calculating, yet attractive enough and flashy enough in battle that she was well favored by the crowds. Her kusari-gama had been known to strangle beasts four times her size before she used the blade to slice open the chest and present the heart to the priestesses presiding over it all.

**Ch'yo** was another story. Dirai could be seen as the Kind Hearted Ditz, though tempered in fires that had caused her to lose any innocence she might otherwise have claimed. Iranae was the dispassionate actress - able to take any role if it would further her station in life. Ch'yo was the Waif. The innocent that even Iranae tried to protect from the harsher realities, though that was hard to do. Looking much younger than she was, as if a human child of perhaps twelve, she was the most recent inductee - and her past had been stolen by spell so there was no telling what horrors she had endured before then.

**S'kaki** the consummate athlete whose favored weapon was the chain-spear. However, she hadn't been quite right in the head since a gorgon's hoof had caught her in a doubles match. Dirai had saved her life, and S'kaki tended to listen more to Dirai than anyone else since then. For her, she strove to find her physical limits and surpass them.

**Kagura** had long claimed not to be a drow elf at all but a human warrior from some faroff land transformed by magic and dropped here. Since the entire thought of someone of a lesser race turned into a superior drow was blasphemy, she'd been thrown into the Arena as soon as she could be subdued. That she had survived clearly meant that she was NOT a human and merely deluded. She prefered to use an oddly curved two handed sword that had been made to her specifications after a particularly tough battle.

**Tlisi** was a spy, used and discarded in one of the battles between the houses. Not being as skilled in battle as any of the others save Ch'yo - it had been speculated that the rogue would be among the first to fall in the year-end skirmishes.

Six followers of a new god. Not the most auspicious start.

Iranae sized up the others. Dirai was in, obviously. It had been her prayer and she had enthusiastically adopted the cause. Ch'yo would go along with whatever everyone else wanted. The child was intelligent and whatever she'd been through had left her shuddering just at the sight of blood, a fate other than to fight and die on the sands of the arena would appeal mightily to her.

S'kaki would follow Dirai to the hearts of the Nine Hells. Complaining and trying to suggest they go somewhere a little less daunting - but she'd go. She was one of those weird drow who would do everything possible to repay a debt.

Kagura had a rivalry with S'kaki, but given a chance to escape would take it. She also had some weird thing called a "warrior's code of honor" though Iranae had met a number of warriors over the years she had yet to see some code that went beyond the next pay period.

Tlisi was the most likely, excluding herself silently added Iranae, to betray the group. Even then, she had lost her faith in Lolth and the Houses and many similar things that were just part of life as far as Iranae was concerned. It was more likely that if she saw an opportunity, Tlisi would bolt and try to find a life as far away from her own kind as she could.

Their new godling was tired out and apparently asleep. Not very auspicious at all.

"Wait a minute," Tlisi interrupted Dirai. "That was a Cure Serious Wounds. What rank of priestess are you?!"

"I think that was about my limit," admitted Dirai.

Tlisi got an unfamiliar gleam in her eyes. If the godling could do that, then maybe he could-

"Hey, little god," said Ch'yo, shaking the boy awake. "So what's your ethos?"

"'Ethos'?" asked Ranma as he slowly came out of the trance. "What's that?"

"Some philosophy that you see as central," said Ch'yo seriously. "With the Spider Queen, it's always been that _evil is strength, the strong enslave the weak, the weak die while the strong survives._ That sort of thing."

"Oh," said Ranma. To him it sounded like the sort of code villains in martial arts epics bellowed about before the righteous young hero redecorated the guy's face. He had to have a code? Hmmm. Maybe.

* * *

Cyric thought of himself as a master manipulator, planner, and consummate god of murder and intrigue. His plan to become a multiplanar god was based on the jealousy and hatred of Lolth, who had long preached that her followers and herself would one day triumph over all others and that she would devour the gods themselves.

If he had succeeded, the drow would have received visits from his image - he would have had a base of worshippers, and he would have become a multi-planar deity. As it was, the worship of spiders wasn't going to maintain his hold in those other planes and he was already under attack by those other traitorous planar deities that he had sought to betray.

His attention was elsewhere, trying desperately to grasp power that was slipping from his fingers.

* * *

Vhaeraun noticed the change almost immediately, and his clerics and agents sought to destroy what they could of Lolth's images and worship immediately. Since he knew only that Lolth's back was turned, by weakening her in this manner would his own power be increased.

Though he could sense her presence still vaguely. Strangely twisted. And oddly masculine. Perhaps she had taken avatar form and disguised herself?

Whatever, this was his best chance to expand his domain, and he was taking it.

* * *

Another god turned his eyes from the chaos going on elsewhere.

He had access to much lore and much wisdom, and quite frankly - he had a score or two to settle with Cyric.

On finding that Cyric had such ambitious plans, it hadn't taken much in the way of motivation to find a means of summoning a powerful entity and explaining the prank that would cause the whole thing to collapse.

The odd thing was, that in this manner, balance would be maintained at the end of the whole thing.

The prank was appealing to the entity contacted, while Lord Ao only cared about the balance. Thus two potential hurdles were bypassed.

As to the one that this elder being known as Toltiir had chosen, he could develop in several ways as he came to terms with his new power and responsibilities.

Though a little nudge here and there might be helpful. Fortunately, he had an agent suitable for such a task in place.

* * *

Ranma wasn't sure what to call an 'ethos' - he had the feeling that it was important though. Maybe it was like the martial artist's code. Defend the weak and stuff like that. The problem was that his stupid father (who had turned into a panda the last he'd seen of the old fool) had pretty much run roughshod over typical martial philosophies. There were stories he'd heard over the years though, so...

Stories? THAT might work!

"Okay, it's like this," began Ranma, trying to remember a story that involved martial artists and personal honor. Especially after seeing what Dirai had gone through - he wanted to suggest a really different attitude to these new acquaintances/friends. He quickly, and with skills he hadn't known he had (mainly because he didn't have them until he decided he needed them) - gave them the story of the old couple where the wife turned sick and the husband left despite the wife's pleas to follow a story of a cure. Only to perish and the wife to die and wait as a ghost eternal whose wailing could be heard among the mountains.

Dirai heard the story and picked up on the message that you had to live while you could, because you could never tell when you were going to end up dying. Even if you weren't an Arena slave.

Iranae heard the story and its ending and picked up the message that pursuing strength for its own sake could lead to self-destruction, and you should always try to keep some healing potions in reserve.

Ch'yo was taken with the idea of better preparedness. If the old couple had taken better precautions, then maybe they could have avoided getting sick.

S'kaki heard the story and interpreted to mean that sometimes you had to let go.

Kagura wondered why that story had sounded familiar. Not realizing she'd heard it as a ghost story years ago herself.

Tlisi got the message that they who hesitated - lost. Speed and adapting to changing circumstance would have saved both of them. Obviously, the importance of good intel was the message meant to be conveyed.

Six people, six messages, one story.

An alarm began to sound elsewhere in the complex.

"I wonder what's going on?" pondered Ch'yo.

* * *

Pentas had spread the word to a number of other males. Some of whom had not been as close-mouthed about it as they perhaps should have been.

The word about Lolth not answering calls for spells was having ripples the further that word spread. The priestesses still had clerical scrolls, wands, and other equipment. Those were finite and carefully hoarded resources though.

Tensions _might_ have merely built up for some time, and the priestesses might have retained control save for two developments.

One, the desperate sending of messengers to a more major city to determine if their plight was limited to their own city.

Two, the decision to make a truly grand sacrifice in order to potentially placate Lolth and regain her favor.

The messengers/spies were intercepted by illithid who quickly determined that the clerics weren't at their full power, radiating fear and anxiousness, and ambushed them to find out more about what had set the drow to such fright.

The second was a more immediate disaster as the priestesses came after Pentas Vourl with the intent of sacrificing the old male to the goddess, as obviously the male being so powerful was an affront to both the priestesses and therefore the goddess.

Pentas not particularly wanting to die in a gruesome ritualistic manner, or even in any particular manner, responded in what he thought of as an appropriate manner.

Golems made of black rock rumbled to life, fireballs went flying, summoned monsters charged the priestesses.

The priestesses had expected to catch Pentas by surprise. Instead they found themselves dealing with a forewarned and forearmed archmage who had been kicked around most of his life, and was now quite prepared to take a few priestesses with him.

At which point the fighting drew other combatants, all with a score to settle, ambitions to reach for, or just plain panicking and running amok.

Summoned spiders fought elementals who battled summoned monsters which attacked golems seeking to crush mages fighting warriors being backstabbed by thieves who were being maced by clerics who had lost control of their summoned spiders.

Chaos and evil were being done with a fine disregard for who was a victim and who was a perpetrator.

The thralls, the slaves, the oppressed, didn't need much encouragement to add their two coppers to the whole mess - and did so with the fervor of those who had nothing to lose. Though they were late comers to this, as most of them had just stood around gawking while it all went to pot around them.

If the thralls had been the first to strike, as they had in other cities, the drow would have united against the threat. As it was, most of the drow in question had already been involved in the battle and saw these new attackers as more evidence that some other Houses were using any means available in their attacks.

It was made worse by the lack of strong leaders in Chad Nespair. Many of the priestesses saw this as an opportunity to rise higher and then unite the clergy under themselves.

* * *

Ranma was being beseiged by a lot of things he didn't understand, but he was coping.

"Uhm, Dirai-chan?"

"Yes, Lord?" the high priestess asked of her god, wondering what the proper terms were for addressing a deity.

"There's a lot of people dying," said Ranma, and he could _feel_ their deaths. "I'm not sure what I should do."

"Well, too bad you can't wave your hand and give us the ability to escape," said Tlisi.

"Ability?" Ranma asked, his eye catching the spider embroidered onto Tlisi's thin build. "I think I know how but..."

"He's a beginning god," explained Dirai. "To invest you, you'd have to be of his faith."

"If he can get me out of here, I'll be his personal spy, bodyguard... Abyss, I'd take him as a lover and dance for his pleasure if it would give me the power to get out of here," drily said Tlisi, who had her doubts about this being for real. Maybe the boy was just one of those mind-mages or something?

Ranma realized something had just opened, and that spider stitched onto her leather battle costume gave him an idea. "Okay... I think the words are 'The Pledge Accepted, The Oath Stand True, By Your Own Choice, Your Service Due.'"

The flash was blinding, especially to the drow, though Dirai didn't seem more than slightly discomforted. Tlisi rotated around in a column of light, a blue and red spider dropping onto her from a mid-air flash and biting her before fading away.

Ranma blinked and smiled. "Hey. I think I did it! Why's everyone up against the wall like that?"

"Just checking the wall," S'kaki announced. For a proud drow warrior and gladiator to admit she'd come very close to pissing in her drawers was unacceptable.

"Oooh," said Tlisi, briefly wobbling on her feet. "Whoa. Hey, what did you do, Lord?"

"It was like I could briefly see how to do somethin'," admitted Ranma. "I got the idea from your spider there and I remember this gaijin comic book. So now you can climb walls, spin webs, sense danger and that stuff."

Tlisi considered her earlier words, tried a few gestures to finally find how she could fire off brief bits of webbing, and snapped the lock to their cell as she tested her strength. "Very well, it looks as if the deal has been made and I'll abide by it."

"Not that you have much choice," said Dirai, clasping the girl on the shoulder. "Though being a spy for a god strikes me as being not an unwise career decision."

Tlisi shrugged, then got a frightened expression. "You don't suppose... it's not required."

Dirai shrugged in reply, being drow enough that having the other girl sweat over the potential duties of the position she now held would be enjoyable.

"The door's open," pointed out Iranae. "We need weapons and equipment."

The room shuddered. Considering that the room itself was dug beneath the floor of the city's cavern gave that some degree of impressiveness.

"Let's go," said Ranma, wondering what he could do about it.

"The dominions I have spell access to are Healing, Combat, and Protection," said Dirai. "It's a pity that Divination is not one of your strengths, my lord."

"STOP! You slaves, return to your cell!" A group of priestesses charged forward, the lead one brandishing a flail whose heads ended in hissing serpents.

"I think I used up my webbing for now just figuring out how to use it," said a disappointed Tlisi. "What now?"

* * *

Ranma was actually fairly happy to see four armed women come charging forward, ready to commit an act of violence.

This was a fight. Something he was familiar with. The whole kami-thing he wasn't sure about at all. Fighting? Much better.

What he did notexpect was quite the results of his combat.

The snakes of the lead gal's whip shot out towards him, and he tied the heads up in knots before throwing it back to slap into the gal's face. That went as normal.

Then he recognized these gals from Dirai's memories. Bad people.

Gal waving some wand at him, he knew whatever it did would be unpleasant and dodged out of the way. Lightning stabbed out and hit one of his followers. THAT he didn't like and hadn't expected, and he kicked the knife out of another priestess' hand to then split that wand with it. He also sped up considerably.

An open palm strike to the armored chest of another priestess, flip backwards, kick that one right in the decorative spiderweb of her helmet, launch from her to bring both hands down on the head of the fourth priestess.

With a sound like a wrecking ball had just impacted a steel pan, priestess #3 became airborne and sped down the corridor as if shot from a cannon.

Priestess #2 dropped her useless wand and slumped to the ground, her helmet shattering like fine glass.

Priestess #4 went down, slammed into the stone pavement with enough force that her magic armor actually imbedded itself.

Priestess #1 was screaming as her serpents erupted in white flame and began flailing around on her as they died.

"Whoa," said Ranma, not having meant to do quite that level. Sure he could remember what he'd seen from Dirai's life and not be too upset about these being hurt, but still.

"Loot the bodies, quickly," said Tlisi, bending to the task on the head priestess. "We needed weapons and equipment and our Lord has seen fit to provide."

"Yeah well," said Ranma, unsure about this.

"Hey! Let us out too!" yelled someone from across the hall.

"Okay," said Ranma, walking over and snapping the lock.

The one who had called out stared, having expected that he would have to make a deal or threats. Not that he was anxious to make threats after seeing those four priestesses get crushed so easily.

"This one's still alive," said S'kaki, holding a dagger up and ignoring the healing spell Dirai was casting on her. It hadn't been a very big lightning bolt. 'That which did not kill her, wouldn't get a second chance' and that sort of thing.

"Not for long," growled one of the prisoners, stepping out of the doorway. "I'll make her suffering last."

"No, you won't," said Ranma.

"Little human, do you think you can stop me without your magic tricks," growled this less intelligent of the hobgoblins.

Ranma's fist blurred. The hobgoblin shot back into the cell and made a crunching noise when he hit the far wall. "Hmmm. Gotta watch my own strength."

The hobgoblins were of a society that respected strength. One got to be leader usually through an act of strength. This little human had just taken their strongest member and thrown him around like an angry dragon might have.

There was a difference between being stupid and being THAT stupid.

Most thought it likely that this was a transformed dragon or other major beast that the stupid priestesses had tried to keep on a leash. Well, they knew which way the wind blew and there was a precedent for following a dragon's banner.

"Lord, what is your name that we might properly address you?" said the first of the hobgoblins who'd called out.

"I'm Ranma Saotome," said Ranma. "Ya want to get out of here, you can tag along."

The first of the hobgoblins nodded and turned to the others, quickly explaining the situation. This being (dragon or what he wasn't sure) would give them escape from these drow if they accepted his service. One, a bugbear in the back, voiced a concern. Thinking about it, the hobgoblin turned back to Ranma to address this issue.

"Milord Ranma of House Saotome," said the hobgoblin. "I am Kakresh, formerly of the Bloody Fist Mercenary Company. Is it my understanding that you will not eat any of these soldiers who pledge to follow you in battle?"

Ranma blinked. "Ah, no. I pretty much guarantee I won't eat any of you."

Kakresh turned back to his mercenaries and assured them that if they pledged allegiance to this lord, they wouldn't be eaten.

"Huzzah!" came the roaring response.

"They are lesser races," said the sneering Iranae.

Tlisi fitted what she could use of the High Priestess' items onto her own form and leaned close to Iranae. "So? We let them go first into battle. You have a problem with this?"

Iranae closed her mouth with a snap, then smiled as sweetly as she could. Actually, put in those terms, having sword fodder around didn't seem so bad.

Tlisi looked at Ranma with a new light. Perhaps her choice of words, unfortunate as they had been, had been responsible for Ranma's choice instead of (as she had first supposed) his need to increase his power base? In that case, particularly with this physical prowess he had demonstrated, the offer became more interesting. Perhaps... Need to get some additional women though - made for better variety.

"What's in this cell?" Ranma asked, noting one was bricked up. The odd chill and that equally odd smile he was getting from that Tlisi woman he decided to ignore.

"An eye tyrant is within there," said the hobgoblin.

"A whoozi-what?" asked Ranma.

"A sphere about so big that floats in the air," said Tlisi. "Atop its head is a crown of eyes on stalks, each eye can cast a beam with a different magical effect, and the main eye can cancel magic directed at it. It is a foul beast that is used sparingly in the arena, for controlling it is a difficult thing."

"Oh. And this one?" Ranma pointed down a corridor.

"A cage for prisoners, beyond that be a young dragon," said Tlisi. "A recent capture. It was injured greatly in a battle, and lies near death."

"Oh..." said Ranma.

* * *

Pentas Vourl smiled and casually tossed the blood-red gem while whispering a name. "Matron Luvrinne Kavriel ar Virumire. Then the others."

The gemstone sped off in a red blur and struck the unprotected back of the neck of the plump priestess. Her hand went back to the spot but it was already too late.

Pentas Vourl smiled. No, subtle was not his strength. Payback was something all drow of his station spent long months plotting though. This idea had been a good one, something a clever apprentice of his had developed while sipping wine from the World Above.

Pentas wondered if that apprentice was still alive somewhere. The only apprentice he'd had that hadn't tried to kill him. It had been disappointing at first. Promising student as far as power and talent of the art was concerned, but no head for politics or intrigue at all. Worse, the thin fellow had become convinced somehow that knowledge itself was the goal and noas power.

Still, he'd had a nice vicious streak when the mood set upon him.

* * *

"Kavriel? What are you doing?" asked the whip thin Matron Acherea, her normally sneering hatchet-face a little off now from swelling where an orc slave had gotten her with a thrown rock. "We don't have time for your silliness."

"Gahk," said Matron Kavriel, eyes and mouth almost comically wide open. "Uhk vung."

"Stop that and help us erect a protective ward in this room!" commanded another priestess.

"We can't control the guardian spiders, they're running amok!" cried out another priestess.

"Vehk," said Matron Kavriel, her body quivering.

"Stupid old bat," said Acherea, ready to slap some sense into her associate.

Matron Acherea had slain over a thousand in her time, a high priestess who had offered their still beating hearts on the altars to Lolth. The more beautiful and exotic the better. She'd spent days delighting in the twisting of the knife - proving that Lolth's way was true and that of those who worshipped other gods was the way of a lesser being. She'd valued Kavriel's clever little suggestions for psychological torture of prisoners, but loathed the way the chubby Matron had spent her life largely eating and doing as little physical as she could.

She was therefore surprised when Kavriel's body exploded outward in bloody chunks and a more lithe form stepped out.

Carved entirely of red stone and lit from within by a ruby pulse, the figure made a spear-blade of one hand and plunged it deep into Acherea's chest. As the Matron tried feebly to pull herself away from it, she saw the pulses within the golem strengthen slightly. Then she felt a rushing sensation and the world turned red.

The other priestesses snarled and unleashed their weapons on the statue. It grasped one snakehead from a flail and there was an odd flare of light before the snakeheaded flail went limp and unresponsive.

"Some kind of vampiric golem," reasoned one of the older Matrons. "Blunt weapons!"

* * *

S'kaki was first into the room, looking for a measure of payback/release. Unfortunately, she could see nothing within to vent upon.

The cages of prisoners were quickly sundered by Ranma, who wasn't using divine power for this. A precise blow, struck at the right angle and with sufficient force, was enough to open these cages.

He had the Bloody Fist Mercenary Company, or what remained of it - twenty hobgoblin warriors with a pair of bugbears. He had Dirai the Blade, his cleric. Iranae the Chain and S'kaki were excellent warriors who had survived the Arena on many occasions. Tlisi was now his spy, sworn to his service, with spider-powers. Little Ch'yo was watched over by Kagura, the swordswoman. Add to that five prisoners bearing severe wounds and smashed limbs.

Ranma looked over each as Dirai cast her remaining healing spells on the worst injured.

The next room brought Ranma up short. "What in the HELL is this?"

"It's a torture chamber," replied S'kaki as if she couldn't understand why the appearance would surprise him. It was highly specialized equipment, so a seperate room was usually used for its operation. Humans had them too, didn't they?

Ranma's eyes flicked from one to the other, noting the hooks and blades and straps and chains. Some of it he couldn't figure out until his eyes would settle on it and dim images of the item in operation came to his mind. The pain and anguish of the drow and others here were enough to impinge on his god-senses.

"The dragon should be in the next room, milord," said S'kaki.

"A little girl died here, watching her parents being..." Ranma had let one hand rest on an oddly shaped chair but now he snatched it away as if burned. "What kind of people?"

"The worship of strength, the showing of strength by causing others pain, my lord," softly said Dirai. "It is understood you are a different sort of god."

"Damn straight," snarled the youth. "Any idea what's behind this wall?"

"Probably the priestess' chambers," offered S'kaki, shuddering at her own memories of this room.

Ranma drew back his fist and lashed out, striking the wall.

The small army he'd been accumulating stirred as Ranma walked away from it, leaving a small dent in the stone.

_crack rumble_ went the wall, a spiderweb of cracks appearing before it collapsed.

"LOOT!" cried a number of hobgoblins, it being a dear subject to their hearts.

"We get first pick," said Tlisi, moving forward into the chambers. "I'll use my skills to defuse traps."

While the hobgoblins had been ready to protest the 'first pick' - the reminder of traps set them back. It would be just like the spider-lovers to do that sort of thing.

Ranma was mainly alone with his thoughts as these others grabbed up weapons and strapped on armor and prepared themselves. He wasn't used to thinking things through. One of the major tenets of the Saotome School was 'Action Before Thought' but this situation wasn't a typical one for someone of his school. Currently he was shepherding a bunch of weaker (than he was now at least) characters through a situation unlike anything his father had trained him for.

These people he was fighting were not good people. Quite the opposite. He was familiar enough with martial arts movies and stories - these were MAJOR league nasty epic villains he was up against. What did the heroes do in those stories?

They gathered together and proceeded to whomp major league nasty epic villain butts. That's what they did. Kurosawa did a couple of those, Ranma was fairly sure.

Ranma nodded to himself, now that his course was clear.

* * *

Ranma leaned back and once again "saw" deeper than eyes could see.

He snarled and the torches ringing the chamber erupted into blue flames.

"cold. so cold. dark." The dragon raised her head, ruined eyesockets seeking something. "I'd spit my last breath at you except that doesn't get past your enchantments and... you're not a drow."

The drow behind the human moved carefully to the sides. The hobgoblins watched from the doorway.

"Hold on," Ranma said, climbing down into the pit.

"Whatever you are," the hatchling said, "you're too late. I die. They bespelled me so that if I escaped, the worms they set in my wounds would consume me as soon as I left their care. They didn't renew the spells. I..."

Toltiir had played more than one joke, and had placed a meaning in setting Ranma up. One of the things he'd felt the humorless drow needed more than anything else was healing. It was therefore one of Ranma's major areas of control.

The dragon felt something reaching out, touch her. She could have resisted and gone into that dark night. She could have chosen to resist.

_A god of healing and fighting prowess? Death and freedom, life and service? I choose life._

_FWOOOM!_

"He's going to have to work on all the flashy lights," complained Tlisi, blinking the afterimages away.

"I... see? I SEE AGAIN! Strength flows back into my limbs!" The little black dragon strained briefly against the chains. She turned towards the others and hissed. "DROW! Seek you to harm him and you'll suffer agony over a DRAGON'S lifetime."

"We're with him," quickly said Tlisi pointing at the male the dragon was protecting.

Tarre looked about uncertainly, rattling her chains as she stood over her human/god. Who reached out and touched her as soon as he was able.

Tarre's form blurred and shrank, revealing a drow excepting for her golden eyes. "WHAT?!"

"Easier to get you out this way," said Ranma simply as he moved past her.

Tarre was about to protest but looked at the thin corridors and acknowledged the point. They'd been able to herd her down those with lashes because it was so difficult to try and turn. Well, these drow might not be enemies, but if she saw just ONE of those spider-priestesses she wouldn't even stop to chew! Besides, she knew she could shift back easily enough. It was easy. Sort of.

The hobgoblins were momentarily nervous but then realized that this was another ally.

Grins began appearing on tusked faces. Their leader had promised they wouldn't get eaten - didn't mean they were going to provoke the dragon but it was something to lend them additional heart.

"All right," said Ranma, yawning. "We're..."

"PRISONERS HAVE ESCAPED! KILL THEM... oh abyss..."

Ranma, the gladiator drow, the hobgoblins, and the others all turned towards the group of formerly charging priestesses.

"Can you read that Gate spell now?" asked one of the Lolth priestesses to another as they saw the group at the other end of the hallway.

Ranma was wearied and needed to catch his breath. This deity stuff was hard work!

That was actually kind of okay with his followers.

Especially one of them.

"**YOU!**" With a thought she shifted back to her real form.

She was small, even for her age, as far as black dragons go. Just a hatchling less than a full year out of her egg.

However, as has been pointed out by sages and warriors and adventurers for a great many years - any dragon is dangerous. A recently healed and up to full health dragon is very dangerous. A pissed off beyond all reason healthy dragon pointed in the direction of its former tormentors is not something to discount simply because it is only slightly larger than a wild boar.

As has been pointed out, the corridors were fairly narrow going into the torture room.

Clerics among the drow pulled out scrolls and started reading from them. Arrows and thrown rocks soared over the charging dragon to delay those spellcasters.

Then it was too late of course.

The drow followers of Ranma were drow. The hobgoblins, bugbears, half-orcs, and other mercenaries were mercenaries of the Underdark used to all sorts of violence. Neither group was particularly squeamish as the roaring, snapping, rending, and other grisly sounds commenced.

Tlisi did feel the need to comment. "Excuse me, Miss Dragon? If you could leave the scrolls and some of the magic items, we would appreciate it."

"Why does she have this yellow crescent shape on the top of her head, anyway?" asked Dirai.

"I dunno," said Ranma. "I'm kinda new at this stuff."

"Apparently," said Tarre, her tongue flipping the circlet off one priestess' head in order to swallow the fleshy portions whole. "Hmmm. Tastes like chicken. Oh, the crescent moon shape. I think that's where you stored my transformation magic, boss-sama."

* * *

Somewhere, a little black cat whistled an offkey tune and tried to look innocent.

* * *

Seeing the chance to make a few points with the 'sword fodder', Tlisi handed an especially large spiked-head mace to the hobgoblin.

"I need to recover," said Ranma. "I think I can Gate home and sleep. You all are out of immediate danger."

"Ah," said Ch'yo. "If you did it in a Magic Circle it'd probably work better."

"A what?" Ranma asked.

"You know about Magic Circles?" Tlisi was impressed.

"I don't know from where," admitted Ch'yo as she found some chalk and began sketching a circle out.

"I think..." Ranma finally passed out from his efforts just as the final line was placed. As he'd thought, going unconscious in this manner meant he was snapped back to his home plane.

* * *

For Ranma, there had never really been a place that had been 'home'. Sure he knew about the world that he'd come from, from television to the basics of his home culture. It was just something that he'd grown used to. But if he'd had to choose even simply a certain city to go 'home' to, it would have been extremely hard, as he'd spent his life basically travelling from one end of Japan to the other.

But the one thing that did not change after all his travels was the fact that he'd gone on all of them with his father. The old man might have been a pain in the ass and one of the biggest fools that he'd ever met, but the idiot was also the only relative that he knew he had. He had an emotional connection with Genma, and his most familiar memories were of being at campsites with him.

So, when given the opportunity to go 'home', he'd centered on the only constant in his life.

If that was for good or bad would have to be seen.

* * *

Genma had seen his son vanish into thin air, and had for the first time in his life, been speechless. Not that he hadn't been quiet before, but he had always had things he'd wanted to say and been unable to in those instances. However, this time was one where he didn't know how to react. His son, the only child of his loins and the person that would secure his future, was simply... gone.

That had taken him a few minutes to comprehend, and when he had, it left him even more out of it.

He recovered quickly though, and had started to harangue the Guide about the whole thing. Unfortunately, all the other man could do was to inform him that he had _no_ idea of how that had happened, and that it had _never_ happened before. And as such, he'd been unable to come up with an idea on how to get the boy back.

So Genma was left alone, without the boy he'd worked so hard to raise for so long, and having the only good thing be that he learned that hot water could turn him back human. That wasn't much, and it didn't help him figure out just what he was going to do. All of his plans were moot, since they'd all pertained to the boy in some manner or fashion.

As a result, he'd decided to travel onwards, and hoped that something would come to him as he did. If nothing else, he could come up with some plan to salvage what he could. At best, he could come across something that would allow him to retrieve his son. And he'd come to this place, simply because it would be the next stop on his journey.

What he didn't expect was for the sky to open up, and for his son to drop onto him without so much as a 'hello'.

He sat up from where he'd been knocked down and saw his son rubbing his head on top of him, making him wonder if the boy'd returned simply because he'd come to a quaint-looking Chinese village.

* * *

She yawned at the familiar early-morning sight. _Ho hum. Another year. Another challenge. Another tournament. Another day of Amazons giving speeches and fighting each other on the log to prove who was the strongest._

_After three hundred years, they all begin to look the same. Boring boring boring._ She quickly determined no one had caught her little slip, with the possible exception of Tai Ga.

Eyes half-closed she studied the scene, comparing it to the countless others she'd seen, looking for differences. _Hmmm. That sumo wrestler over there with the Jusenkyo Guide has a strong chi. Waitaminute. What was this?_

The sky opened up and dropped a boy with some really odd aura on the overweight individual.

Also something odd-looking that she couldn't immediately identify.

_Okay, this is different._

* * *

Cologne had seen many things over the years that she had been alive. There had been many warriors that had trained for the Tournament, and many an amazing fight had occurred there. All sorts of special techniques had been used, and the healers had managed to work on injuries that she knew that outsiders might have found fatal. Many items of Power had resided in secure Amazon hands. And all that was just in the village.

The sight of a boy dropping from an opening in the sky to land on an outsider was new.

However, that was nothing on what came after him. A rather large lizard like being came from the same opening, and landed nearby. The creature seemed to be rather confused, and out of it. If the blinking was any indicator, it seemed to be rather surprised to be out in the light. But even then, this was not something to take without caution.

Of course, wary looks followed its path as it sniffed slightly. Something seemed to interest it, and the assembled warriors had stopped to see what that could be. When they saw what it was, they knew that it was not the worst thing that could happen.

"That... that... It's eating the prize?!" Shampoo blurted in surprise.

Her great-grandmother raised a brow. "It's better than some things I could mention."

However, Mousse didn't see it that way. "That was meant to be Shampoo's prize!" he declared, and pulled out a chain, "I won't let some... thing eat it before she can win it!"

Tarre merely turned at the noise and wondered what it was all about. She'd gotten some vengence on those that had hurt and imprisoned her, but drow priestesses weren't exactly the most appetizing things. The food in front of her had seemed to be a much better meal, though she hoped that the indigestion she'd been feeling wouldn't be such a problem.

But she did wind up burping a bit, and let a little cloud of gas out. Terribly embarrassing for her, especially as it had escaped her control, but not the worst thing that could happen.

Then again, Mousse wasn't thinking that way, as the lizard-thing had put out a puff of gas that had just melted his chain, and had nearly gotten the rest of him.

Not that Tarre was paying attention as she'd simply hit her chest and muttered "Damned acid reflux," before turning back to eating.

* * *

The creature was about the size of a wild boar. Black glossy scales except for the little yellow crescent on the top of its head. White teeth. Wings. Tail. Horns that curved around like ram's horns on either side of its head.

The face was skull-like, the tail was long and ended in a thick horn-like substance.

Cologne quickly assessed the thing as it ate and her best guess was that it was some Western-style dragon. From the webbing between claws, slightly flattened tail, and smell - she was guessing it was the sort to lair in swamps or other partially aquatic environment.

She also noted that the way it ate indicated it possibly had a gizzard or second stomach.

That her grand-daughter had picked it up and was now cooing at the beast was a little more concerning.

"It's so CUTE! It keeps trying to eat my face! Does little snookums want some broiled fishie?"

"Are you sure you should have something that can melt chains that close to your face?" asked Cologne.

"Eh?" asked Shampoo.

* * *

Ranma passed a weary gaze over the group and tried to figure out what he should do. Despite the odd way he'd arrived, and the fact that Tarre had apparently decided to help herself to the food, only one person had really gotten angry at the moment. And that boy had wound up with his weapon being turned to liquid by a burp.

However, it was readily apparent that things did not look so bad. The girls and women milling around seemed to be holding themselves back for the time being. Tarre was apparently quite pleased with the attention that she was getting, and the girl holding her was acting totally happy right then. About the only problems he really had at the moment was his confused father, and that boy in the white robes that seemed to be checking his eyebrows at the moment.

So, he made the only decision that he could, given that he could find no immediate dangers around him.

That was why the assembled Amazons got to watch as the boy stumbled over to a corner, laid down, and curled up for what looked to be nothing more than a nap. One moment, he was teetering on his feet, and the next, he was snoozing away. Not that they could blame him, if he looked as tired as he seemed.

Of course, once Tarre saw him, she turned from the latest tidbit of food she was getting, and looked towards him. "(Boss-sama? Are you okay..?)"

"Huh?" Shampoo muttered as the cute lizard thing seemed to be pulling from her. "What's it doing?"

Looking over the situation, Cologne realised that this could be problematic to say the least. She had inklings of what Shampoo's little 'friend' might really be, and could tell that this boy was not one to simply ignore. As such, this had to be dealt with carefully. "It seems that the creature is concerned about the boy.?"

"It is? There must be something going on there then..."

"Yes, but fortunately, it seems that he's just very tired."

"Then what do we do?"

"We make sure to care for them for the time being," the Matriarch replied and turned to look and point at several Amazons, "I want you to carry him to the Healers' hut, but make certain that you take care to treat him gently. I don't know what is going on, but I'd rather not risk trouble at the moment."

"And this cute one?" Shampoo asked, nudging her chin at the dragon hatchling in her arms.

"Bring it too. We don't want to risk trouble."

Tarre was troubled as she saw several of the strange elves go around the slumbering godling, but when she saw how reverently they were carrying him, her concerned lessened a bit, and it almost vanished when she realised that they were taking her along with him. Not that she was totally unworried at the moment, but she thought it only right that they show him some respect. "(I hope you're taking him someplace good...)"

Left standing alone, Genma watched in dull shock at the women took his son, and the... whatever it was, away.

* * *

Ranma snoozed on, but sensed he had some unfinished business.

_Poof!_

"He's back," said S'kaki.

"Wha?" Ranma woke up and glanced around. "Something seems different."

"Would someone explain exactly what's going on?" asked Cologne politely.

"I can!" a little drow girl held her hand up. "We found a Gate scroll and used it to summon the god Ranma from his home plane to here."

"He's a god?" asked Cologne, pointing at the young boy.

"Not terribly powerful or experienced, as I understand it," said Kagura. "He's new to the job, in other words."

"And since the power of a god in this realm is tied to the number of those who worship him - he keeps running out of power," said Iranae.

"He's a god? You're dark elves?" said Cologne, peering about her.

"I don't know about 'worship' being required," said Tlisi. "Just swearing to follow his cause seems to be enough from tales I've heard of some of the human gods."

Cologne digested this while the various Amazons discussed this amongst themselves but kept an eye on the matriarch to see what SHE would do.

"Oh yeah, that's what I had to do, I gotta go see that bee-holding thingie," said Ranma, snapping his fingers.

"Excuse me, can you do something suitably miraculous?" asked Cologne.

"Besides teleporting us into a dark spooky area where the air is uncomfortably thick," pointed out Lilac.

"Besides apparently giving us the ability to speak all the same language?" asked Tarre, who was otherwise fairly content with the situation.

"Huh?" Ranma looked up, then over at the group. "So you're saying if they swear to follow me, I won't tire out so quickly?"

"Essentially," agreed Tlisi. "That's the basics."

"Hmmm," hmmmed Ranma. "Okay. How about THIS."

Dirai saw the energy flare out, and Ranma go back into unconsciousness again. "Looks like he wasn't recovered enough."

* * *

"Well, this is new," murmured the figure who was standing where the Amazon Matriarch was. But unlike the wrinkled and bent figure that most of the Amazons present had grown up knowing, this was a taller woman with a lithe and dark skinned figure. Taking a long lock of white hair from behind a pointed ear, she moved it around so that she could look at it, giving a smile full of whimsy at the sight.

"Hmmm..." Lilac frowned slightly as she tried to figure out just what had happened, though she could swear that it would be easier than she thought. It took her a moment to look at the person standing before she started blinking in surprise. "Cologne?!"

"_That's_ the Matriarch?" blurted one of the Amazon males, "But she's pretty and the Matriarch is like fruit that's been out in the sun too long, wrinkled and sour!"

That earned him a whack from Cologne's staff. "I am still the same person, so no backtalk from you."

"Ow..."

"But you do have to admit that this is astonishing. If you didn't have the other... changes, I'd swear that you look just how you did eighty years ago," the Healer Elder commented.

"Oh... Well, I'll have to take your word for it," the Matriarch replied.

"Trust me on this, if one really looks, you'd be instantly recognisable."

Shampoo turned to the Healer with with an amazed expression. "Great-grandma looked like this when she was young?"

"If you change the ears, and coloring, sure. She's the image of the girl she was. Did you think that she always looked the way you knew her?"

"No... It's just the only way I've ever seen her."

"Trust me girl," Lilac murmured, "You had to get your looks from somewhere. Though I'm sure that she's probably enjoying a respite from all her aches and pains."

Cologne gave her fellow elder an irritated look. "I happen to _like_ my aches and pains."

"Why would you?"

"Because I earned them, and I know just why I have... had them, thank you."

"But still, it's nice to see you so young," Shampoo commented.

"Actually... she's still at the same age," Kagura corrected.

"Excuse me?"

"She's been turned into a drow. Because of that, she'll live much longer."

"Really?"

"Oh, yes... So long as someone doesn't kill her before she gets old enough..."

"You see," Dirai pointed out, "Our lives are stretched out compared to yours. We may take longer to grow up, but we live longer. So... when you start 'feeling your age', we're still young."

"But why did he turn my great-grandmother into one of you?" the lavander haired girl asked.

Lilac raised a brow. "I'd say that he did it because they're his followers."

"Oh..."

"Still, much as I enjoy the return to something approaching my youth," Cologne drawled, her expression turning serious, "Are we in danger of him changing all my people?"

"You mean making you follow him?" Dirai asked.

"Yes."

"Hmmm... So that would include making you fight each other for his favor, using trickery to gain power, asking you to sacrifice peopl to him, follow priestesses who'd torture you for anything they don't like and basically suffer your whole life?"

"That is something that we would not follow."

"That is what he's saved us from. Or at least get away from. He has freed us from the cells we were in, and given us the power to fight for our own lives."

"Hmmm..," went a number of Amazons thoughtfully.

* * *

The Amazons were a proud people, and female-dominant. The society of the drow was apparently female dominant, but they had a male god. Even if he was prone to narcolepsy and new to the job.

Seeing him change elder Cologne into a darkskinned elf that resembled her younger form, and watching her go through a high speed kata that proved she wasn't slowed down or handicapped in anyway, they decided to discuss this development.

The really really ugly male mercenaries had all been listening and now were grinning. Sure they all had deities of their own races, but that wasn't a big deal to a mercenary warrior. They would call out oaths to foreign deities as they went, their own deities when applicable, and otherwise rely on their own skills.

Kakresh was the head of the Bloody Fist Mercenary Company, the former leader now imbedded in a wall back in their cell. He had initially thought dragon, but was quick to update his resume when he'd heard these others speaking. Mercenaries of a new god? He explained this to the others, pointing out the positives and negatives involved. Four members had left the company at that time, wanting no part of it.

Others had been less than enthusiastic but no others had left. Great dangers to be sure. On the other hand, the potential rewards were likewise great.

As it was pointed out to the Amazons, the mercenaries had already accepted Ranma as a god. Two of them had already done sacrifices in his name, to the amusement of the drow contingent. They might not be proper priests, but they'd gathered up a large number of scrolls (mostly spider-related spells) and magical items (that looked "iffy" by majority opinion) and sacrificed them in Ranma's name on an altar they'd made out of an altar that had formerly been used by the Lolth priestesses.

Unfortunately, it had seemed that something else had been attracted by the events and they'd spotted the blurred shape of something a couple of times. Tlisi had nearly caught whatever it was before it faded through a wall.

Which was why they'd used that Gate scroll. If it was a big nasty, best to deal with it with their god backing them up.

* * *

Ranma slept. And as he slept, he dreamed.

_"Hello, Ranma Saotome."_

_Ranma looked around at the wooded forest fading in around him. "What the heck?"_

_A woman who looked similar to his followers on that one world stepped out of the shadows. Just an incredibly good looking one. "Well met, warrior."_

_"You know my name," said Ranma._

_"I am Eilistraee, drow goddess of non-evil drow, dancing, and swordcraft," said the goddess._

_"Okayyyy," said Ranma. "Just stop by to get acquainted?"_

_"Not quite," admitted Eilistraee. "I am here to explain a few things and to see what your plans are."_

_"I don't know what's going on at all, so that would be a good thing," admitted Ranma._

_"Sit down, this will take awhile," said Eilistraee. "Not long ago, Lolth planned a ceremony to increase her power and do something else that I'm not sure of. Whatever her plan, she ran afoul of the god Cyric."_

_"'Cyric'?" asked Ranma._

_"One of the human gods of the World Above, a god of intrigue, murder, and lies," said Eilistraee. "This Lord Of Murder sought to kill Lolth and take her own power for himself, vastly increasing his influence and power as he took over the portfolio of drow elves. He acted, slaying a major portion of Lolth and binding the remains. He planned on betraying his allies thereafter, but one already had betrayed him and summoned forth an extraplanar deity sometimes known as Coyote. Coyote, for whatever motive, stole away the portfolio of drow elves and gave it to you."_

_"I don't know any 'Coyote' unless that's the one in those American cartoons chasing that Roadrunner," confessed Ranma._

_"A trickster god, and an Elder god at that," said Eilistraee. "Most likely motivation would be that he thought it would be amusing."_

_"Ah," said Ranma, nodding. "Most of my life I felt like some Being up there was jerking me around and laughing at my expense. Now it all makes sense."_

_"In any case," said the goddess, "you have watched through the eyes of your chosen champion Dirai and know her life. You have touched on similar things with the others. You are more than you once were, Ranma Saotome."_

_"I suppose," said Ranma. "These people ain't exactly had a happy life so far. What I saw in her life... man. She went through living hell beyond anything the Old Man put me through."_

_"And there are others of the drow pantheon seeking to increase their own followers now, appearing in visions and whispering in the ears of those who are inclined towards their own philosophies," stated Eilistraee. "Speaking of which, I've got a minor miracle scheduled in fifteen minutes, so I'll have to make this briefer than I'd like. Your power level is dependent upon the number of followers you have and your portfolios. The more useful your area of control, the more you are invoked, the more power you use and receive."_

_"Like using a muscle?" asked Ranma, getting it in those terms._

_"In a way," Eilistraee allowed. "This is your current status."_

Ranma Saotome.  
Drow god of martial arts, trickery, and healing.  
Favored Weapon: Staff or katana.  
Domains: Chaos, Healing, Knowledge, Trickery, War.  
Symbol: not chosen  
Animal: Pegasus  
Align: ?  
Worshippers Align: ?

_The drow goddess tapped the display. "You're going to need to lock down some of the undecided values."_

_"That's... strange," admitted Ranma. "Wait a minute. If I'm the god of martial arts -"_

_"Only applicable while you're on the plane of existence which houses the Realms," pointed out Eilistraee. "Back in your home universe you're mostly the same boy you used to me. Just that you have a lot more chi and a few new tricks and abilities such as going from your home universe to the Realms and to your Outer Plane. There are also places you can't go - like the City Of Sigil. Our time is up, Ranma Saotome."_

Ranma awoke. He had to go see a beholding thingie. He'd promised, and he was betting that promises carried weight with the status.

A thought brought a grin to his face. If he was the drow god of martial arts, then THAT meant. He'd have to look into that. It could be helpful.

* * *

Genma sweated heavily as the Amazons continued to glare at him.

He had no idea where the house containing their elder and a few guests had gone. He'd been sampling the wares of that vintner. Why didn't anyone believe him?

* * *

Genma didn't understand how this could have come about. This had not been in the plans that he'd put together, as it were. For years, he'd lived in a nicely balanced world where one simple philosophy had worked for him: 'So long as martial arts are involved, no cost is too great.' Of course he'd gotten into a whole lot of trouble with that attitude, what with studying under an old pervert, stealing things, and constantly getting into trouble.

But his son vanishing and reappearing, giant lizard things, and all the other wierdness were not helping matters. As it stood, things were going off on some wierd tangent, and at the moment, survival was simply the only goal at the moment. He had to keep breathing to get the boy to meet Tendo and any daughters he might have, so that made it a little more important. And with the assorted Amazons glaring at him, there was a bit of danger in his situation that needed to be immediately addressed.

Especially since, as he turned to show all of the women a nice and soothing smile, he saw them setting up a cookpot that would fit just about any panda he could think of. By the way that they were looking at him, and were already preparing the water, they had a specific 'foodstuff' in mind.

Not that he thought that he deserved any sort of animosity. He was as confused about the situation as they were. That had led him to need a refreshing drink to calm his nerves. Fortunately there was a vinter nearby, with some wares that he could use to do the job. And he couldn't simply drink on an empty stomach, so a little snack wouldn't hurt. Added with a comfy seat, he had plenty of opportunity to chomp down... get something in his belly as he focused on his son's disappearance. It was simply not a good thing, and he was sure that he'd have a katana meeting his neck if he returned home alone. That would only be possible if the Amazons didn't try to kill him for making their hut disappear.

Of course, for all he knew, the women could have caused it themselves, thought he didn't know how or why they'd do such a thing.

So, he held his ground, knowing that at any moment, he'd need to bolt.

"He's a thief, and a pig, for all he's a panda. But is this really what we should do with him?"asked one Amazon.

The Amazon next to her nodded. "Certainly. He's been grabbing any sort of food that he can see. Would you like to deal with having nothing to eat on top of having the Healers' hut vanish?"

"Well, no..."

"Then this is the best option. Besides, he ate all our food. So why shouldn't we get what we were supposed to?"

"That idea's not too appetising."

"It's supposed to be that way. Maybe he'll get the message this way..."

"Oh."

* * *

Pentas Vourl stood before the others, reflecting that the situation had not only changed but that things had come to this level.

"Some of you have heard of a frozen water phenomena called snow," began Pentas. "A tiny fleck of which supposedly can move down a mountain slope, accumulating layers of other snow droplets until it is a mighty avalanche that can sweep a village in its path away. We are seeing just such an avalanche through our society. Here we have the priestesses who have long dominated our society being swept aside as they battle amongst themselves as much as against any of us. Meanwhile we ourselves, the downtrodden males, have organized and pulled together."

"That's as much because we were threatened to die alone, together we have strength," said one of the warrior types. "If you're attributing it to this new god, I'm skeptical to say the least."

"Perhaps, perhaps not," admitted Pentas. "In any case I have been monitoring the faithful of this new god, and am prepared to convert to this faith myself."

The males stirred at this measure, too conditioned by their old faith to easily accept this changeover as if discarding an old cloak and selecting a new one off the rack.

"I urge us all to accept this," said Pentas smoothly. "I will get further details but it is obvious that this fledgling god is still so new that his worship mainly consists of swearing by his name. This is our chance to take the initiative and forge a new clergy with a new doctrine. WE can help determine the path this new faith takes, but only if we move quickly."

"Why don't we simply kill this new god and take his power for our own?" asked one of the other wizards.

"Because, new to the job or not, he is still a god. Such are not easy to kill," said Pentas, who'd considered the option himself at first. "They also have allies, enemies, and other problems. Besides, who would get the power? Would any of us trust one of the others of our number with such?"

There were frowns and mutterings, but that last point clearly scored home.

"I'll call for a vote," said Pentas, "then go and deliver that decision to the god himself. Frankly, an added bonus is how well this is going to sit with the spider clergy. They should be most displeased with the idea."

* * *

Mystra nodded to Lathander. Things were progressing well. It had to do with Magic - her own domain. It had to do with new beginnings - Lathander's domain. It had to do with knowledge and lore and studies - Oghma's domain. It had to do with justice - that was Tyr's territory.

Each of them had some problems with Cyric in the past. None of them had wanted to see Cyric's power increased.

All within their portfolios, naturally. It was entirely within their duties to keep track of the new godling. Finder even had some hand in it somewhere down the line.

It wasn't a conspiracy, per se, it was merely that all of them had some common interest involved.

Such as slipping a word to Eilistraee, who was the one most likely to be affected by the new godling. As expected, she was _quite_ intrigued with the developments.

The vote amongst the wizards, who were currently the law within that city, was as expected. A shrine to the new god was created through arcane magic, and two of the fighters swore oaths to make themselves priests of this new deity. They would then go and spread the word, but just because those gathered were the current administration of the city, that meant that the city itself was now converted to the new faith.

The godling was no longer the deity of a few scattered people, he was the god of Chad Nespair. Not a particularly big city, but a city nonetheless.

It was a start.

* * *

Ranma walked into the room, not sure what to expect.

Four beams hit him, sizzling briefly as they played along his skin.

"Hey now, none of that," cautioned Ranma. As a deity, even low level, the petrification and death magic beams were ineffective. Likewise he couldn't be charmed by spell at least. The disintegration beam kind of stung though.

"Free me or die," said the orb, hovering menacingly.

"Well, that was what I wanted to do anyway," admitted Ranma. "Free you, that is."

The beholder shut its mouth. Anti-magic ray seemed ineffective. Target couldn't be disintegrated and seemed to have some powerful magic resistance. "You're letting me go? You fear me, as you should."

"No," said Ranma. "I just remembered I had promised to let ya go, so I'm opening this cage. Just don't do anything to any of the people on my side and we'll call it even."

"Ah," said the beholder. It understood this now. This humanoid was letting him go specifically to sow destruction among his enemies.

"I'd teleport ya out of the city, but I'm kinda tired out," admitted Ranma. "So, uhm, later."

The beholder paused as it began floating out. "How do I know who are 'your people' amongst those arrayed against me?"

"No problem, I'll tell em ta get out of yer way and not attack you or nothing. That way if you do get attacked, it ain't my group," said Ranma before he vanished.

The beholder nibbled a lower lip in concentration. The boy had been standing in the beam of an anti-magic ray, but he had clearly teleported away. This bore some consideration.

* * *

In another pantheon, such a situation might have been ignored, or quietly returned to a balance, but that was not the type of grouping that Vhaeraun belonged to. That would mean some sort of cooperation or at least laziness, and the Drow gods tended to be neither. Each of them wished to garner more power for themselves, and if that meant taking advantage of chaos, then so be it.

This was a plum opportunity after all, and no Drow god worth his salt would have left it alone.

As such, Vhaeraun was smiling to himself as he considered what was going on. There was a new god on the block, and one that was growing in power. Not a sign was around of where he'd come from, but that did not quite matter. What was important was the fact that this mere boy was able to give the Drow God of Thieves more power, and in this case, this was the perfect time for it. After all, Lloth was nowhere to be seen, and as such, her domains were up for grabs. If on was wise, then one could grab up her power for himself.

And the boy could possibly grow into a credible threat. It was simply smart to get rid of him before he could actually become powerful enough to actually turn out to be dangerous.

Not that he'd actually deal with this himself. There were others to send for that task.

* * *

There was one thing that Ranma noted as he walked down the hallway, and that was the fact that the place was rather depressing. It was as if someone had sucked out all the light and life out of the place and left it almost like a pit. But then, from what he could tell, that was exactly what happened.

It was just that he'd been in caves back during his training journey, and those had been full of life. There had been bats, bugs, and lichen, not to mention all the other critters that had made the solid spaces their homes. He hoped that something could be done, since he knew that this was not quite what one could call a home. Not that he'd had much experience with having a place to live, but this was not a comfortable place to stay.

Of course, the prickling on the back of his neck didn't help his unease, but it did let him sense the figure standing in the shadows. He turned around and faced the watcher, certain that he had to keep on his guard. There was something about his guest that told him that this was not to be a pleasant situation. Perhaps it was the fact that all he could see was a cloak, as the individual in question was completely enveloped by the shadows under it. However, it was more likely that this 'being' was standing unnaturally still, and obviously was waiting for him.

And all question about the other's intent was gone as the figure leapt at him, quite obviously in an attempt to slay him.

Ranma dodged the strike the shadowed figure sent his way, the blow instead cratering a section of wall.

Naturally, as this wasn't far from where the temporary encampment of his 'followers' were - the sound drew them to investigate.

Ranma reached into himself and shifted his eyes again. Now he could see in the shadows and he could see that his opponent was...

"C-c-c-c-CAT?!"

The creature turned, snarling in a fashion that showed all sorts of teeth. It rushed again. Ranma dodged again.

"What the heck is that?!" one of the Amazons asked as the creature went back to being a blur of motion.

"It looks sort of like a six-limbed tiger crossed with a man," said Cologne. "It seems to change color to fit in with its surroundings."

"A magical assassin-beast," stated Ch'yo. "A devilcat, an unimaginative name for such a rare creature summoned from Baator. They are said to be godspawn themselves and only four exist."

The hobgoblin mercenary Kakresh already had his crossbow cocked and fitted a bolt into place. Assassins were always trouble, he knew from personal experience with such things. They'd go in and kill off your employers and that meant no pay. Very bad for business. The only problem was trying to hit the correct blur. Well, that and he really doubted he could do more than annoy some powerful demon with a bolt purloined from a secret compartment in a spider-priestess' armoire.

Ranma was faster and stronger than the average human before becoming a godling. Now that he was a godling, he was somewhat more impressive. Unfortunately, panic tends to cloud one's tactical awareness.

The blurs resolved themselves as Ranma ran out of places to dodge. Pinned to a section of corridor he watched as the creature resolved itself, the blood on its fangs and claws completely foreshadowing its intentions upon his own flesh. He met its eyes and saw his worst fear rising up to meet him as the creature used it's _Cause Fear_ ability on the inexperienced godling.

It shouldn't have worked. Even a minor godling like Ranma was immune to the vast majority of compulsions and charms.

"murRRRRRRRRRaow."

The devilcat momentarily paused, this not being something expected.

The two went into blurs again.

"The Nekoken?" asked Cologne of no one in particular.

"The whozee what?" asked Dirai.

"A martial arts technique that involves some serious psychological problems," answered Cologne. "This is interesting."

As noted, Ranma was faster and stronger than the average human. When in the Nekoken he was faster and stronger than when not in the Nekoken. Becoming a godling had upped the bar significantly. Put him into the Nekoken while he was a godling and...

Pentas Vourl didn't know what was going on, but he was currently invisible and saw his chance. When blood was fountaining from one of the blurs, he collected it. You could never tell when something like that would come in handy. Hmmm. Demonic ichor. Useful in a number of spells. It looked as if association with the new god on the block was going to be quite handy.

Walls began blowing apart as the two blurs took their battle elsewhere.

The fight began to draw attention from others in the city as it passed over their heads. Fireballs exploded. Poisonous shuriken made of black crystal were deflected to lance through entire buildings. Prismatic rays were fired.

The two eventually stopped, hanging in midair over the city. The devilcat was bleeding from dozens of cuts along its body, and for the first time in a millenia long existence it knew what it was to be the hunt_ed_. Facing it was a fierce looking red-furred tiger with black wings. It visibly smirked at its opponent.

The devilcat snarled and charged, growing in size as it fought with all its might now.

The red tiger returned the snarl and size change, then raised the bet by a dismemberment.

The devilcat crashed to the ground, twitching as it tried to move again.

It would have disgusted human Ranma, but for the godcat this was just something necessary. The godcat began to feed on his former opponent, taking in its power and adding it to his own. Each munch and crunch and slurp echoing through suddenly empty streets.

The godcat turned and slunk off with a final lick of its ichor-stained muzzle. To rest and recover, and to digest this meal.

"Urp."

* * *

Vhaerun felt the connection to the assassin dissipate and frowned. It had failed? Unthinkable, for a new god to be able to destroy such a thing. Unless...

The drow god of thieves frowned thoughtfully. Tyr was a god of the human populace. He was originally from offplane, where he'd been a major deity himself. Could this new god of the drow actually be an established god from another universe much as Tyr was?

Vhaerun nodded to himself. The simplest explanation was often the best one - and that meant instead of facing some new godling like that whelp Cyric, he was facing an established godling of some offplane pantheon who was now establishing himself here in Realmspace.

In that case, he'd have to be more careful in the future dealings with this new god.

* * *

With the disappearance of Lloth, it was a free for all, at least in regards to divine power over the Drow. 'Business as usual' in such an atmosphere had not been good one to begin with, but now it was a complete time of chaos. The power balance had been seriously disturbed, and all that had been Lloth's was up for grabs. And for the more... ambitious dieties, it was a chance to grab up power from other rivals as well.

Yet, the death of an arch devilcat was enough to break through the focus of most of them. Many could feel what had happened, and at first, the idea that someone could have unleashed that was a reason for concern. But the death of that same creature was both a relief, and a worry. Despite the fact that it could not come after them, the idea that someone could actually survive and win against such a being was not good news at all.

Kiaransalee was one of those, and she knew that this was not a good thing for her health. If the one who had slain the creature was to come after her, it would be that more dangerous. However, as she considered what was going on, she was certain that she could still handle the situation. A _human_ godling might be a problem, especially one that could slay such as that, but immediately killing him was not the only option. Sure, destroying this neo-deity might be the fast way to power, but he'd already proven to make that useless.

However, he _was_ a godling after all, and only starting to come into his power. For the most part, he was a child, and a parentless one at that. In such cases, there were ways to act that wouldn't be a problem at all.

He would need things that a young man in his position would have to find eventually. A 'mentor' would guide him in the... 'proper' use of his position, and abilities. Then again, an ally would likely suffice if he was too headstrong, and she could be close as his 'friend'. The ultimate way to keep him from acting would have to do with being his bedmate, in that someone like him would likely be inexperienced in such matters. No doubt someone like Nocticula had already thought of that particular path.

After all, what better way was there to get close enough to manipulate, use, and possibly kill him than to be his lover? Besides, he might be worth a momentary diversion if nothing else.

Though, she did have to wonder whether that would be worth it, or even if it would be needed.

* * *

One moment the hut was there, then it was gone. Now it was back.

Cologne sat through three hours of interrogations to prove her identity.

In that time, the sleeping boy was watched over by a number of the warriors and a dragon and two others.

Ch'yo was a repository of arcane knowledge, though she didn't know how she knew it. Those memories, like so many of her personal memories, seemed lost. She studied the spellbooks she'd acquired in the raiding of the arena's offices, and was struck by the feeling of deja vu. She knew this stuff for the most part, it was more like she was revisiting familiar territory than learning something new.

Kagura simply meditated, lost in thought. She had been swept along by recent events and was trying to put them in perspective. Though the drow mainly seemed to think she was crazy, she half-remembered odd bits and pieces of her life prior to her transformation. She had been human once, of a distant land in Kara-tur. She was a warrior, of a warrior house. Samurai - she had been trained in bow and sword and tanto knife and naginata spear. Most of the details were fuzzy, but she had a few vivid images from that time. She had reconciled herself to dying in the arena, as sport for the cold-eyed dark elven matrons. Now her future was less certain, but her prospects for survival higher.

Shampoo was likewise uncertain about things as a simply damn HUGE winged tiger had shrunk to the size of a housecat and curled up asleep in her lap. The transformation had ended in his sleep, and now the normal-sized boy was sleeping in her lap.

Shampoo thought he was fairly cute, but innately dangerous. An interesting combination that she was still exploring her feelings regarding.

Though things had shifted, one person was constant in his plans. That was, of course, Genma Saotome.

Even now he was planning on snatching Ranma away from this village and zipping all the way to Japan where the boy could at last marry one of Soun's daughters and provide for his long-suffering father's retirement. There were a few obstacles to these plans, but soon they'd lower their guard and that would be when he made his move.

Unfortunately, they were about to run into another problem.

* * *

Mousse was not a stupid boy by any means. He was quite capable of thinking things through, learning foreign languages, and dealing with the problems that came his way. Many girls who had met him were aware of the fact that he was an attractive young man, with a lithe musculature, and a face that was rather appealing. Only two things kept him from being dragged off to some Amazon's home.

One was the fact that he was almost so blind that he could mistake a warrior's _horse_ for the warrior herself.

And he was totally and utterly obsessed with Shampoo.

So, when he'd seen that the hut had vanished with 'his love', he had been rather disturbed by the whole thing. Others had been concerned by the fact that a large group of their sisters were gone, but he was too busy worrying about that one certain girl. She was everything to him, and he was sure that the two of them were meant to have a lifetime together.

When he had heard that the hut had reappeared, he'd been sure that something was going on. He'd already been singed by some gas, and by the time he'd recovered enough to notice, she was gone. But now he had the chance to do something to help her.

Nothing would stop him from doing so, and he ran full tilt over to get to the place in question. He wasn't about to let anything stop him, and didn't even bother with any show of manners. After all, 'his' Shampoo needed him, and he simply went to enter the hut.

Unfortunately, he hadn't realised that he'd accidentally walked into the women's bath, but they were used to his antics, and were immediately able to provide the impetus for him to leave the place.

Stumbling out and wincing from the various objects launched at his head, he thought as quickly as he could manage, and figured out the route to the hut as best he could. This time he wasn't about to screw up, and he made sure to follow the proper path to his destination. And he actually made it, this time with no problem.

"Shampoo!" he called out.

"Stupid Mousse," said a familiar voice that set his heart soaring. "You be quiet."

Turning to face his 'beloved', he found himself ready to leap over to her. But first he wanted to be sure that she was safe, and so he put on his glasses. That was when he got a major shock.

Laying in her lap was a _boy_, and not just any boy. It was one that was about the same age as them, and if he remembered correctly, he'd seen him earlier. However, that did not matter, as the interloper's head was near her magnificent bosom, and his body was so close to... to... _there_.

It was obvious to Mousse that the boy was doing something perverted to the lovely Shampoo, and so he charged fowards and yelled out, "Don't worry Shampoo! I'll get the pervert off of you!"

"You is pervert," she replied, not even looking as she backhanded him away. "And no bother him."

Sitting up from where he'd landed, the Amazon got set to protest... and discovered a group of not at all happy warriors who were standing around him.

They were definately not pleased by his actions. This boy had popped up out of nowhere twice, brought an acid breathing creature and two dark skinned girls with him, transformed the Matriarch into something like the girls, and had teleported an entire hutful of Amazons to another world. No one thought that it would be a good idea to bother this boy.

As such, Mousse wound up getting hit by a great many young women as they decided to make sure that he didn't bother their rather powerful, and cute, visitor.

* * *

It was one thing to be a newly forged god. It was another thing to be a teenager. Both were difficult things, full of new possibilities and new limitations.

Of course, some were more limited than others.

Mousse leapt past two Amazons and thrust out with a spear that he'd pulled from one sleeve.

Ranma, apparently still asleep, rolled off Shampoo's lap.

_CHUNK!_

"(Mousse?)" asked Shampoo. "(Where exactly did you think you were aiming?)"

Mousse grimaced. Now that horrible boy was off Shampoo. A clear shot!

_Roll_ back into Shampoo's lap.

_THWUNK!_ went a spear into the floor.

"(Stupid Mousse!)" began Shampoo.

_roll, stretch, shift, twitch,_ went Ranma.

_whack, thunk, thud, stab_ went Mousse.

Several Amazons looked at each other, not sure whether intervening was a good idea or not. The boy seemed to be handling things fine, but Mousse was now flailing around with the spear.

Bleeding now from several wounds, Shampoo arose. If she had ever glared at Mousse in icy fashion, the look she sent his way could now be measured in degrees Kelvin. In the single digit range.

Mousse didn't immediately notice.

Shampoo reached gently out, closed her fingers around Mousse' shoulder, tenderly drew him closer, and hit him in the jaw so hard he spun around three times.

Then she collapsed, bleeding rather heavily.

Ranma stretched and opened his eyes. "Did I miss something?"

* * *

One of the Amazons looked at the godling and shook her head. "Idiot on floor is Mousse. He stabbed at you, missed, and hit Shampoo."

"Oh..," Ranma murmured with a wince as he looked down at the girl who was laying on the floor, and was obviously heading into shock. "But why did he do that?"

"Likes her. You were in lap."

"Man... That ain't right... I've gotta do somethin'..."

Shampoo managed to give a smile, and understood that he felt responsible. But she didn't blame him, as she'd always known Mousse was too stupid to see that he could do something like this. However, she knew that it had happened, and by the feelings running through her body, she knew that it was only a little while until she was gone. It was not the honorable death of a warrior, and she regretted that, but the goddesses did not always allow that. She could feel the strength seeping from her body with her blood, and the darkness crept in on her even as she saw some healers trying to rush to try to save her life. But she knew that they could do nothing, as the inevitable came, and all was black.

But then a bright light burst through her vision, and suddenly she could feel again, and for a second she was disoriented.

"(Is this heaven? I'm breathing..,)" Shampoo muttered to herself, and reached up to pat her chest. "(And I'm not full of holes. What happened?)"

"Ahh... Good. Ya are still with us..," commented a voice and she blinked away the glare of the bright light as she saw a visibly tired Ranma standing in the Healers' hut.

"What you do?"

"I brought ya back."

"So... You heal Shampoo?"

"No."

"But I no be bleeding..."

"That's 'cause ya were dead for a moment there, but I managed ta bring ya back ta life."

That set the Village Champion back a little, and she sat up, brushing her hair away from her ear as she did so. "Okay... I..."

"(Why does Shampoo have pointy ears?)" asked one of the Amazon warriors.

Ranma saw where they were all staring, and knew that he had to say something. "Uhm, sorry about that."

Several Amazons simply gave him level looks, and he found himself feeling sheepish.

Shampoo, on the other hand...

* * *

"(I'M A KID AGAIN?!)"

"(Look at it this way, Shampoo,)" counseled Cologne. "(At least you're too young for Mousse now.)"

Shampoo looked thoughtful in a sort of cherubic way. "(Put that way, this isn't so bad. How come I don't have dark skin and white hair?)"

"(You're not a dark elf, I expect Ranma was trying to broaden his scope a bit,)" explained Ch'yo. "(Most likely by trying NOT to turn you into a dark elf, he ended up with you becoming another sort of elf.)"

"(You speak Mandarin very well,)" noted Cologne.

"(It's a Tongues spell,)" said Ch'yo with a shrug and self-depreciating grin.

"(So what kind of elf am I?)" asked Shampoo, thinking that at the very least that she had the opportunity to play games again instead of having to take so much so seriously.

Ch'yo studied her briefly before making that decision. "(I'm pretty sure you're an Avariel. Those are the only ones with wings that I've heard of.)"

"(Wings?)" Shampoo asked dully before realising that she'd been accommodating a weight on her back without even realising it. A part of her also noticed that no one else had consciously that they were there until it was pointed out, as their expressions showed. She worked her shoulders for a bit, and then tried moving them, finding herself giggling in delight when they moved with her thoughts.

"(I see that you like them.)"

"(I _do_!)"

"(Well then, that won't be so bad, will it?)"

The former teen shook her head, happily imagining herself using her wings to do everything from flying away from Mousse to gliding high over the mountains. Of course, she did miss her former age, and had been proud of how attractive she'd been, but if she had to trade in her bosom for wings, it wasn't such an awful exchange. Besides, she'd get to get her shapely figure back once she got old enough, and this time she'd know what to expect.

"(So now the Matriarch has white hair for a different reason, and the Village Champion is a child with wings,)" murmured one Amazon.

Another raised a brow. "(Is that so bad, considering what a godling could do here, especially with what has happened?)"

"(Not really. Of course, Rin Rin and Ran Ran will probably be pleased that their big sister can play with them like just another kid now.)"

Several of the other humans there nodded at the words, but didn't say anything about them.

"(This is proving to be an interesting situation,)" Cologne said to herself as she watched her great granddaughter awkwardly flap her new wings.

There were ripples sent out by the alteration. Lolth was dead in several planes at the moment - the victim of Cyric's ambition to become a multi-planar deity.

However, Cyric had not benefitted from this plan. Instead a new god had been born.

Ranma Saotome, drow god of healing and excellence in battle.

He had started out a cocky youth focussed entirely on martial arts, however he had wanted to understand some of the people following him - and had utilized a thread of power to do so with his chief follower - Dirai The Blade. (Actually she was a specialist in using twin weapons, so it should have been Dirai The Twin Blades, but there hadn't been room on the posters for her debut fight.)

Ranma was still sorting out those added memories.

The new god was reinvesting most of his power out again as soon as he obtained it, taking an approach to this new profession much in the manner of his approach to martial arts. In fact, he had come to terms with the whole thing by thinking of it as a new style of martial arts.

There was also Tarre, a black dragon hatchling who had been tortured by the drow and was now Ranma's follower. She had a pet avariel whom she was tolerating on her back at that moment.

There was an avariel child named Shampoo, who was not exactly a follower of Ranma, but who did think that the dragon was her pet and was currently taking advantage of her smaller size to ride dragonback.

Cologne was now a drow elf, and other than the pointed ears and coloration resembled herself from her youth.

Ch'yo was an apparent youth, but a magical prodigy and genius girl.

Back on Toril, there was a small but growing group of supporters.

He had rescued several prisoners, five of whom were in this small army. Of these five, two were dark elves, one was a dwarf, another a human, and the last was something very unusual. A half-ogre named Harold, who had a kind heart and gentle manner despite being something of an idiot and having the sort of strength and stamina that even demons from the pit would be respectful of.

There were those he'd rescued originally, though Ch'yo was with him on Earth, all of whom had been drow women gladiators. Dirai The Blade, now his chosen head priestess for all the lack of ceremony. Iranae The Chain, a specialist in chain weapons. S'kaki the chain-spear weapon specialist. Kagura, who was a dark elf but apparently cursed to think she was a transformed human. Finally there was Tlisi, empowered by a transdimensional warp of a genetically engineered spider to bite her and give her spider powers.

There were the males of the city, whom had formed an impromptu alliance and now were standing behind the new god. Some gave lip service, others were more enthusiastic, all of whom were counting that they were not considered suitable for living sacrifices under this new faith as a good thing.

Led by a hobgoblin named Kakresh, the newly reformed Bloody Fist Mercenary Company was also counted among the followers. Two were now, in addition to their skills as warriors, getting minor clerical spells in response to their sacrificing of a large amount of scrolls and other loot and decision to follow this new faith. Those new priests couldn't cast anything more powerful than Cure Light Wounds, but considering how useful that was to mercenaries - nobody was going to complain. There were fifty two members of the Bloody Fist Mercenary Company, not counting those who had left or the former commander now a crushed corpse against the wall of their cell. There were some bugbears, gnolls, a couple of goblin scouts, and a minotaur. All of whom respected strength and fighting prowess and had seen this new god demonstrate such.

This was all the subject of much discussion.

The drow and mercenaries had talked to the Amazons that had become displaced, who had been spreading the news around the village ever since returning.

Some of the Amazons wanted to chase the god out of the village, or at least have nothing else to do with him. Two of their number had already been transformed, though one had apparently challenged this fellow to show his power and the other had been returned from the dead. These also argued that this wasn't exactly a competent or experienced god since neither had apparently been intended with quite those results.

Some of the Amazons were saying to heck with tradition, to heck with status quo, and to heck with the first group. Elder Cologne was young again and from the sound of things could expect several centuries of renewed vigor as a result. Shampoo might be a child again, but she had wings and the cutest little monster any of them had seen. Epic quests, good versus evil, magic and melee! They wanted whatever they could get out of the new situation and if that meant cozying up to an outsider male, that was hardly the worst that could happen.

A third group of the villagers was neither enthusiastic about this new god, nor completely opposed to his continued presence. There were always those who wanted to "sit on the fence".

As for Ranma, he was sleeping again. Not only trying to recover power used, but to assimilate the memories he'd copied from Dirai and the energies of the Baator devilcat that he'd eaten while under the Nekoken.

Genma was still wondering what was going on and figuring out a way to steal Ranma and make it back to Japan with him. All this craziness had started in the Amazon Village, and the sooner he got the boy out of here - the better.

Vhaeraun, god of drow thieves, was recovering from his efforts and wary of the new godling. He had used a lot of power to summon and control that magical assassin, and he didn't dare sleep it off when so many of the other drow gods might check up on him and try to cut the competition down. He was under the impression that this upstart was actually an established human god just setting up in Realmspace as a newbie.

Kiaransalee was another matter. Having interpreted the ripples from Vhaeraun's attempt, she was ready to seek the new god's seduction or mentoring if either chance presented itself.

Eilistraee had already introduced herself and had offered her alliance.

There was even more going on though, partly because this WAS the Forgotten Realms.

For most of the gods, things were in a major shake up. Lloth was not an easy being to get rid of, and the idea that she had been... slain on several planes was a big one. That meant opportunities and problems for the rest of them, and they all knew that they had to watch what was going on, even if it was only through the corner of their eye. And to those who had helped to ruin Cyric's plot, it was exactly what they wanted.

Of course, Toltiir this was working out a lot better than he'd planned. After all, it was thing to shake up drow culture, but it was quite another to bring together all these odd races, including the Amazons. The warrior women might not be as dark and dreary as the Drow, but they were a bit hidebound and arrogant, and the chance to get them to learn that their vaunted 'history' wasn't going to solve everything was a good thing. Luckily, they weren't of the sort who would be thinking to kill any of Ranma's followers, at least not yet.

But then there were ways of handling those sorts of people.

* * *

It had quickly become clear that Lloth was not about to answer the call of her followers. Whether that meant that she'd removed her favor from the Drow, been blocked from answering them, or had simply been slain, the result was always the same. No power flowing from Lloth meant that the priestesses were severely weakened. And though that was a cause for celebration for some, to others it meant that there was much to be concerned about. The spider goddess had true believers, and they were not about to give up on their diety.

So, having heard that some drow were turning against their 'true goddess' to go and worship some _human_ godling, they were incensed. That sort of situation meant that they had to act quickly and decisively. If they were too slow in their reaction, it would give the godling a chance to garner more followers, and would deal a blow to their own reputations. With the priestesses out of action for the most part, warriors were to be used, and were sent out through all the 'secret' places that most Drow were unaware of. They had a map and things empowered to help them, but they didn't make it to where this so called 'god's' followers were hold up. However, they did learn some new things.

First, one had to realise that once a map falls into enough liquid for the ink to run, it becomes rather useless.

And second... dracolichs _really_ don't like being disturbed, especially by humanoids throwing arrows in their general vicinity.

* * *

As far as Genma was concerned, none of the incredible strangeness surrounding him was good. He wanted nothing more than to take his son away from all this, as nothing but oddities continued to be piled upon the boy. Somehow these women had managed to transform two of their number, and could transport huts, but he didn't know how. There was a temptation to learn, since the women obviously had some mystical powers.

However, it was not part of _his_ Art, and so he could leave it be. What he really needed to do was to get his son away so that this way the boy could get back to training, and the both of them could return to Japan. Tendo was waiting for them, and if all the interest that the women were showing his son was an indicator, his old friend's daughters would be fighting over his boy.

Unfortunately, there were women looking to protect his son from him, and others who were intent on keeping the boy isolated, even from his loving father.

As a result, all he could do at the moment was sit and pout.

* * *

Karrul knew that most of his current companions thought him to be just another human that had been taken by the drow. That, in and of itself was true, since he had been unlucky enough to be caught when his path had crossed that of a drow raiding party. He hadn't expected them, and since there were more of them than him, he eventually wound up being beaten.

Then had come the enslavement, where he'd been played with by bored drow women who had entertained the idea of using and abusing an exotic male. There had been times when he'd found 'mistresses' who enjoyed using his back as a whipping post. However, he'd never died, but he'd also kept himself from seeming too strong. He'd walked a fine line until Ranma Saotome had set him free, as he'd kept himself just interesting enough to stay alive, though being thrashed into a bloody pile each day was not his idea of fun.

But he never revealed his true self to the drow, since he liked breathing, and they'd kill him, or worse, if they knew exactly what he was.

* * *

One of these things is not like the others. One of these things didn't belong.

In a world like Toril, where ancient empires had enjoyed centuries of progress before one thing or another caused the civilization to collapse and become lost to time - there were a lot of odd bits surviving. Sometimes ancient evil survived, waiting for a chance to claim new victims. Sometimes it was what had killed that civilization in the first place. Sometimes it was lore, magic, or artifacts of power. Sometimes it was a legacy.

In the case of one human warrior, it was himself.

He had started out as a thief of sorts. A young boy who'd heard of a massive and powerful spell being cast at the capital that day. He'd snuck a look, curious. Also hungry - he was a street urchin and had to steal things in order to find the money for food.

He was still convinced that he hadn't been detected, but there was a suspicion within him that somehow his presence had helped to throw things off somehow. A guilt that had remained with him for a very long time indeed.

The spell had gone wrong. Horribly wrong. Things had started going wrong all around him and some massive energy charge had picked him up and slammed him around until everything went black.

When he'd awakened, the civilization of his birth had collapsed and the desert was claiming it. Ten years had passed, or so he would eventually discover.

He couldn't die. Whatever that magic had done when it had unravelled like that, it had passed through him and altered him somehow. Every time he got to old age where his body was giving out, he'd just blur and be that young boy again - and have to walk out of that damn desert once again.

At least nowadays he was sure to make his way back there and leave supplies. The first few times he'd not thought that far ahead.

He'd taken up weapons training when he found those who could teach him. Being a fighter meant that you could find steady work, and he still ate and drank and slept. Eventually he'd tired of the constant killing, sending people and things to where he himself was denied. He'd had his fill of thievery, and so turned his hand to the magical arts only to turn out not to have any major talent in that regard. At best he'd only be a mediocre mage.

Clerical studies likewise went over his head. Thievery had no great interest for him. All he knew at that point were the Arts Of War and a few Arts of Peace.

He'd spent centuries working a variety of jobs. Blacksmith, weaponsmith, armorer, field hand, trader, tinker. Nothing had really fit his style, no calling in life had suddenly materialized. All the comrades in arms, neighbors and friends, associates and rivals and enemies - they were briefly here and gone again.

He'd been the bad guy, then the good guy, then the indifferent guy. Nothing had broken his curse, and now he was convinced that it was indeed a curse. For his guilt on a single day in a kingdom long vanished, he was cursed to continue to walk the lands until he'd been made up for that loss.

About five centuries ago, or was it six? Whatever the case, he'd run into some magic that would allow him to progress in the magical arts. It had at least been something new to try, a different path to take.

That hadn't cured him, but it certainly made his once-a-generation trips from the great desert a lot easier to deal with. He'd gradually risen through the magical arts, made more difficult because he usually preferred a simple and direct approach to problems and not waving his hands around and fumbling with spell components. Once he'd reached as far as he could, he turned the interests together and begun fashioning armor and weapons with enchantments.

It had been that interest in manufacturing enchanted weapons that had brought him to the Underdark, though it was only a drop of interest in a bucket of ennui. He was simply looking for something interesting, and even being whipped by the drow had been... boring.

Now here he was, with a group that seemed as unusual as any he'd found. A bunch of penitent drow, a half-ogre whose strength seemed to rival a storm giant's, a group of goblinoid mercenaries, a fledgling god, and warrior-maids from another dimension. All involved in a set of civil wars erupting in the underground cities of the drow.

This... just might be interesting.

* * *

_Otherwhere:_

"So... in this other world, I'm..."

"The salvation of a race of elves and the god of martial arts prowess and redemption," said the Raven.

"That's..." Ranma searched for a word to use.

"Not what you wanted to see?" asked the Raven. "Understandable. How about this instead?"


	8. Chapter 8: Elfguest

_Prime:_

"That was completely screwed up," protested Ranma.

"Well, I did say it wasn't one of mine," said the Raven.

"So they're all screwed up like that?" asked Ranma, who wasn't about to admit the idea of him being some martial arts god was actually kind of attractive.

"Well, not always," admitted the Raven. "Some are like this one."

Ranma peered closer to see what this one entailed.

* * *

Son of Omake  
chapter 8: Elfguest

by myself and Thrythlind (waves to Thrythlind)

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. So, here goes. If anyone ever DOES do something with this, be sure to get permission from Thryth as he also is on fanfiction.

* * *

Ranma stared at the item, not believing that something like this had just been left here amongst the wreckage from some massive battle.

Yet there it was.

Naturally he had to pick it up and verify that it was indeed what he had thought it was. A perfectly circular bit of blackness.

Ranma checked it out. Grab the edges and you could fold it up and stick it in a pocket. Lay it out flat on something and it was a hole.

How thoroughly neat. Immediate uses occurred to him. Akane cooking or Kodachi drops by? Quick escape route!

Ranma put the Portable Hole in his pocket carefully. It was now the secret of the Saotome School Anything Goes Escape Manuever - I Got A Hole In Me Pocket!

Naturally it was a secret manuever. If people knew about it - they'd be able to stake out the other side of walls and wait for him. So, only use it when he had ducked out of sight.

Whistling happily, Ranma went back to the Tendo Dojo.

* * *

Ranma smirked as he was confronted by first Kodachi, then Akane, then Shampoo, followed by Ukyo followed by...

He let them chase him into the laundry room, locked the door behind him, threw the Hole against a wall, jumped through, folded the Hole back up and congratulated himself on his new martial arts manuever.

By now they were breaking into the room and had discovered the windows were shut and no exit so they'd be tearing the room up looking for him.

Except he wasn't there.

Yup. This was going to be one special manuever he was going to love.

Walking down the street, Ranma slowed as a thought occurred to him. If he tried to use the hole against something thicker than a foot or two, how deep exactly was the hole?

Finding a nice place to practice it, Ranma tried throwing the Hole against the ground to open it up, then stuck a branch through the black surface. Nothing . On hearing renewed and closer pursuit, Ranma decided to try crawling in. What surprised him was ending up...

"Okay, we're not in Nerima anymore," said Ranma to himself.

* * *

He had stuck his head back in Nerima for just a second. Returning to the moonlit forest near the cavern, nearly an hour had passed for those of that world. Ranma didn't realize this of course. Merely that the fight/chase he'd heard earlier had ended.

Meaty thwacks and coarse laughter reached Ranma, and he ran by impulse to find the encampment.

This was not Nerima. It was not a typical martial arts battle. Insults were not being exchanged with the threat of violence.

Ranma was therefore adapting to what he was perceiving.

In the forest was a campfire in a campsite. With a pale moon overhead and unfamiliar star patterns, Ranma could see the captors and their captives. Not terribly well, unless one was in front of the fire such as that particular one there.

The captors were huge. Easily seven feet tall, knots of hard muscle over lanky frames, wearing patchwork armor of some sort of Euro-Medieval feel. They had sloping foreheads, bulgy brow ridges, flattened noses, and tusk like lower teeth.

They were quite clearly not human.

Ranma had followed the trail out of curiosity but on seeing the irons stuck in the fire, and one of the big fellows pick it up and give it a critical look, he couldn't help but look towards the captives.

Captives who were tied to trees.

When the big fellow with the hot poker pressed it to a captive's skin and that captive gave out a definitely female scream?

When another gave a startled grunt and seemed to be looking right at him?

Leap. Circle Kick. One down.

Duck under an axe swing. Leg sweep. Palm strike. Two down.

Dodge three spear jabs by leaping over the thugs. Kick to the base of a skull to increase the leap. Three down.

Kick a fallen spear up into hands. Spin. Block attacks as you back up. Wait for opening. Step inside guard. Uppercut. Four down.

One is yelling commands. Obvious target. Block. Block. Roll. Leap.

Commander uses large axe and shield. Really big fellow. Roll between legs. Lash out with kick at unarmored area. Five down.

Five left. Roll to avoid sword swipe. Backflip. Backflip. Backflip while grabbing rock off ground. Throw rock. Laugh at bad guy's expression as rock slowly peels off his face. Really pissed off badguy.

Leap. Sideleap off tree. Grab and throw manuever. Badguy in fire. Captives tied to trees. Begin dodging burning and really upset badguy and remaining followers. Soul of ice. Spiral in. "Dragon Ascension Spiral."

The battle-groove passed as the life-and-death struggle ended. Ranma frowned thoughtfully as the spiral had gone off, but it had felt "off" somehow.

When he approached one of the two women with a knife she started freaking out in some language he didn't understand. After he cut the two out of their bonds, they retreated a little ways and watched him with fearful eyes. He also got his first good look at them.

They were quite clearly not human either.

Instead of the crass ugliness of the badguys, these two were beautiful despite their pointed ears and long eyes. He also had the feeling that the situation had just gotten complicated somehow.

* * *

"He doesn't seem to speak Underdark, I've tried three languages," said Sanri to her sister. "Underdark, the Common trade language of the upper world, and Old Elvish."

"He doesn't seem to know much other than fighting," agreed Unri to her twin.

"So what do you think? Some warrior caste out to see the world? I heard once that humans have a reverse-gender view of the world so perhaps he's out to establish his own House?" Sanri ran an appraising eye over their savior.

"I think," said Unri, "that humans are a lot cuter than I'd thought. At least he doesn't seem inclined to sacrifice us to HER."

"I've heard humans don't particularly care for spiders or their demon-goddesses," added Sanri.

"Well, it was a brief freedom, but at least we know the role and as servants of this human - we gain his protection." Unri showed she had no weapons and knelt before the boy. Minutes seemed to drag on. "What's he doing?"

"Going into an absolute panic and practically glowing, though it's hard to tell with the fire messing up my darkvision," Sanri responded. "This language barrier is going to be a problem."

Looking somewhat annoyed, Unri stood. The boy was waving his hands in front of him and obviously making denials of some sort. How could someone so skilled in battle be so clueless outside it?

Sanri tried her hand at it. Crossing to the boy, she took one of those flailing hands and caught it in between her own. Still holding his hand, she brought it to where her heart was and then touched his own chest over the heart.

The boy made some more statements in that strange language.

"Calishite you think?" Unri asked.

"Possibly." Sanri kind of doubted it. "I wonder..."

* * *

He'd been a little concerned about the fact that both were nearly naked. When that one had knelt before him, he'd been very uncertain about what to do or what she'd meant.

The other gal had at least given him a clue. That bit about the heart beats probably meant that despite their weird looks, the two were still more like him than not.

He'd been here too long though. Time to go back. It had to have been a half hour or so, therefore maybe the pursuit had ended.

One of the girls was following him, and he hadn't gotten too far when the second one caught up - sheathing some kind of knife and carrying a pair of backpack sort of things. Obviously stronger than she looked.

Well, time to make his goodbyes.

* * *

The odd human came to a scuffed cross shape in the road and began speaking in that odd language.

Unri had handed off one pack to her sister and now handed her sister one of the daggers. "You know it's odd. Maybe he's one of those 'paladin' types? I had to slit the throats of those orcs to keep them from coming after us."

"At least we reclaimed our stuff before they split it up. I take it you didn't loot the bodies?"

"No time," complained Unri.

"That's a Portable Hole? No, he wouldn't crawl through as if peeking around a corner." Sanri figured it out. "Some sort of magical gateway then."

"Good," said Unri, brightening considerably. "If we have to have a Master, best we have one who can take us to exotic locations."

"Sister dear, we've spent all our lives as slaves of Mistresses who have rarely let us leave her mansion - much less the city," said Sanri as their Master began to shimmy further into the blackness. "ANY location, save places like the Demonweb Pits, is a step up."

"Together then?" asked Unri as their Master's form quickly sank into the darkness.

With a smile and hope in their hearts, the two slaves leapt in after their Master.

* * *

Ranma was just reaching down to fold up the Hole when two girls literally leapt out of the darkness to stand before him, smiling briefly at him before staring off into the distance.

Ranma turned to see what they were gawking at but it was just the city. He tried to use sign language to indicate they should return.

* * *

"Good googly moogly," said Sanri, using the most hideous obscenity she knew.

"So many lights," said Unri. "They must have some impressive sorcerors here."

"Uhm, what's our Master want? He wants us to dance for him?" Sanri asked, befuddled by the human's gestures and movements.

"Ah, he wants us to fold up and take the gateway with us," said Unri, kneeling and doing so. She naturally put it back in the pocket she'd seen him take out of, and smiled as her hand brushed something... interesting.

"ARGHHHHHHH!" said their Master, apparently frustrated about something.

"Maybe you're right," said Unri after watching the show and failing to understand it. "Get your finger-cymbals out. I'll get the banner-drum."

* * *

Instead of going back, the one gal had folded up his Hole and put it back in his pocket. He'd felt her hand dipping in there and it had felt... strange.

"ARGHHHHHHH!" Ranma exclaimed. "That's not what I meant!"

The two girls said a few things more in their odd language, then one pulled out a sort of tambourine, the other put some of those finger cymbals on her fingers, and the two started to dance.

Ranma couldn't help but gawk at this.

The two of them danced and kicked and played their instruments in an odd melody. Naturally being Ranma he noticed they were very flexible, very lithe, and had good muscle tone.

He was also aware of the two turning bright smiles his way as they spiralled in to brush up against him.

The music stopped abruptly and the two looked off to the side. Ranma, naturally enough, looked that way himself.

Ryoga Hibiki stood there, parasol held ready, with a completely pole-axed expression and a thin dribble of blood from his nose. "Ranma, prepare to die?!"

Even with that coming out as a strangled squeak, Ryoga managed to hold that position an entire three seconds before collapsing.

* * *

Ryoga slowly woke to feel water being splashed on him. Blinking open his eyes he saw that it was Ranma, now female, and...

Those two girls were still with him! "BWEEE!" (Ranma how dare you flirt with such... whoa that's darn near see through where it actually covers.)

"Hey P-chan. Ever have days like this? I save two girls from some kinda monsters and now they're following me everywhere."

Ryoga thought about that. Nope. He really wished that sort of thing DID happen to him. It'd make a nice change of pace. AHHH! That girl was groping Ranma-chan! "BWEEeeeee"

"Great, he's fainted again," said Ranma, before looking towards his groper. "Do ya mind? They ain't melons at the market!"

The girl looked into Ranma's eyes, then nodded and went back to discuss something with her twin.

Ranma made a disgusted sound. Now he had to find hot water for himself, though it'd be easier to get P-chan back to the dojo than Ryoga.

Now where to get some hot water? At night? At this hour?

* * *

"Some kind of curse, you think?"

"Yeah. Definitely the same person, and definitely not fond of it," answered Unri.

"So he's some sort of questing hero," theorized Sanri. "Definitely a step up from Matron Redwidow."

"Odd friend of his. Turning into a whatever that creature is." Unri thought about it and grinned. "Kind of cute though."

"We'll have to see what develops there. Ah, the Master is making his move. Her move?" Sanri pointed. "That 'co-chi-o' seems to mean 'follow me' or something."

"I wish you'd memorized a 'Tongues' or 'Speak Languages' spell," said Unri. "I know you went for spells specifically oriented for escape, but still."

"If I'd known, I would have. As it was, I'd cast all my useful spells before we ran into those goblins." Sanri walked faster to follow their Master. Mistress. Whatever.

A few minutes later their Mistress found a ramen stand and got some hot water. At which point he became their Master again.

"He changed to female when he touched the water in that pond," observed Sanri. "The water he received in that odd cup was steaming hot. So he has a curse related to water temperatures. I wonder what the mechanism is."

"You were the Librarian for the Mistress, and if she'd ever found you scribbling notes down - I'd have been short a sister. I was the one that got the dirty jobs," said Unri.

"Yes, but you became a pretty good fighter. I hope this isn't far. We're both practically dead on our feet," said Sanri with a yawn.

"Tell me about it. We only had a chance to catch our breath when we were about to be gutted and eaten," agreed Unri.

* * *

The family was waiting as the door slowly opened. As Ranma attempted to sneak in and up the stairs.

"Ranma! Where were y..."?! Akane stopped as the two women entered after Ranma.

[What the ?!] Genma's sign read.

"Is that real gold?" Nabiki asked of no one in particular as she looked at the rings, bracers, anklets that the twin girls wore.

"Oh my. Elves," said Kasumi. "This just might be interesting."

Ranma slowly turned to regard the staring crowd.

"Elen sila lumenn omentielvo," Kasumi said bowing to the two elves, much to their surprise.

"Uh, what did she say?" Unri asked her sister. "It sounded like Elven but..."

"Oh my goodness!" Sanri said, excitedly.

"Kasumi," Nabiki sighed. "This isn't a novel you kn..."

"Quenta le quena?" one of the girls asked in a hesitant voice.

Kasumi responded in a rush of language that was rather excited and difficult to follow.

"U...Ulinte..." the same girl said hesitantly.

"Oh my," Kasumi said and repeated again, slower. "Le esse onuva?"

"Nan Sanri," the girl said, pointing to herself. Then she pointed to the other dark-skinned girl. "Na Unri."

"Ah," Kasumi said, turning to everybody else. "She says their names are Sanri and Unri."

"You understand that?" Unri asked suspiciously.

"A little," Sanri said. Her sister gave her a sideways look. "I've never heard it pronounced before!"

And then Kasumi was talking to her again.

* * *

Akane tried to communicate with the two directly via sign language. They should put some clothes on!

"What is she doing? 'Strangle the mop' or 'tie me up and whip me good'?" Sanri asked in Underdark and then began trying to translate that into the Auld Elvish that the older human girl seemed to favor.

"I thought it was 'Table Dance For Two' or maybe 'Put your armor on'," said Unri after studying the motions briefly. "Or is that a strap on?"

* * *

Akane did her pantomime of "You two should put clothes on because Ranma is such a pervert you'll need to protect yourselves!" and was rewarded with genuinely puzzled looks. In Japanese, Akane explained that was what she was trying to convey.

"Akane, it looked more like you were trying to say 'dirty dance while playing the guitar'," suggested Nabiki, her thoughts turning briefly away from gold as she stared at her sister.

"I thought it was 'I've got an elephant in my pajamas'," complained Ranma.

"Actually Sanri tells me that they think they understood what you were trying to say and now they'll dance for you," said Kasumi.

"Huh?!" Akane asked. "How could they not understand that?!"

"Akane?" asked Nabiki. "How could anyone actually understand that?"

* * *

Finger cymbals chimed and the two began their dance, this time centering on the loud girl who was obviously one of their Master's associates. Or a particularly ill-mannered servant. Perhaps a fellow adventurer? Whatever. It was something to do.

They undulated and gyrated and moved through the motions of their dance, slowly moving so that they finally were up against the loud one. Glances at their Master told them that he was raptly watching the show (staring in stunned disbelief) and hadn't complained (was too utterly stunned to speak even to put foot in mouth) and therefore approved.

As for the girl, she was now glowing to their heat-senses and hadn't moved an inch (too embarassed and shocked to move) so she must have wanted this. They could tell from observable signs, in fact, that she was becoming aroused (as well as embarrassed and shocked) very quickly. Sanri ended by coming up behind the girl and hugging her lightly from behind while Unri did the same from the girl's front, letting their heat soak into the formerly-loud girl.

* * *

Nabiki stared. While nothing overt, every move had darn near screamed sex. If she had gotten a video of that dance, she'd be filthy obscenely disgustingly rich. Which was exactly how Nabiki would like it.

Akane twitched as the two released her and took a step back in unison.

Akane twitched again.

(ZOOOM!) "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" (SLAM!)

"Aw crap, I was hoping to get a bath myself," said Ranma as Akane locked herself in the bathroom. On seeing people staring at him, his reply was simple. "What?!"

* * *

Unri and Sanri looked back along the trail left behind by the loud girl. How odd. She had obviously enjoyed the show but then gone racing off like that.

"Different customs?" asked Sanri.

Unri nodded. "Expect so. I'm a little more concerned that our Master didn't react in the ways that males are supposed to. Perhaps he's not into dancing?"

"Might still be a cultural thing," pointed out Sanri.

Kasumi said something then, long and involved.

Sanri nodded and replied back in the same language before translating for Unri.

"I don't trust the girl there, she reminds me of some of the Matron's friends," Unri told her sister. "She's staring at us as if wondering how much we would fetch on the open market."

* * *

Nabiki eyed the gold (real gold!) decorating the visible portions of flesh. The twins were dressed nearly identically. The two were dark skinned and white haired and (as near as Nabiki could tell) identical from the tips of their pointed ears to their thin sandals.

They were dressed in cloaks and carrying something like backpacks. Under the cloaks they were wearing darn little, thin bits of ripped fabric for the most part.

Then there was the important stuff. The jewelry.

Both were wearing identical jewelry except that the color of the stones were different. One had reddish-purple stones, the other had stones in shades of green. They were in the elaborate earrings. They were in the elaborate collars. They were in the clasps that held the cloaks in place. They were in the rings that adorned their middle finger and middle toe that had chains to the cuffs at wrist and ankle. The stones were not present on the gold bands decorating thumb and the other fingers. The stones glittered on the armbands.

Gold! Not only gold but artistically worked gold!

Much much money in her future.

* * *

"(You come Ranma from where?)" Kasumi asked in Elvish.

"(We two come Underdark Ranma with,)" said Sanri in equally clumsy Elvish. Actually it was Auld High Aelvish, but close enough.

"(You is...)" Kasumi tried to find a word from the Tolkein Elvish that meant 'fiancee' or maybe... "(friend is of Ranma?)"

"(Know word, not know meaning,)" said Sanri. "(We be raised as slave for sacrifice. Ranma find and save we. We now slave for Ranma.)"

"(Not know words,)" confessed Kasumi. "(What mean 'slave' and 'sacrifice'?)"

"(Sacrifice what old... Lord want do,)" said Sanri. Which was followed with a brief explanation of ritual torture followed by the ripping out of their hearts and presenting them on an alter for a dark goddess.

Kasumi twitched and was considerably paler. "(That is... not goodly.)"

"(Then,)" began Sanri, giving the details of their capture, eminent torture and likely inclusion on the dinner menu.

"(Pardon my leaves be brown,)" said a severely rattled Kasumi.

"(Then Ranma-lord save us, so we swear serve him,)" finished Sanri.

* * *

Nabiki was still staring at the gold and imagining all sorts of ways of parting the obviously idiotic elves from that gold.

Genma, Soun, and Ranma had all been noticing how pale and sick Kasumi had begun looking during her conversation with the one elf girl.

"So what did they say?" Soun asked, ready to throw the little monsters out if they were a threat to the union of the two schools.

Akane came out and sat FAR away from the two girls, eyeing them distrustfully.

"Okay," said Kasumi, not wanting to mess this up and understanding the situation somewhat now. She still had some details wrong, but she had a better grasp of this than she had had when Shampoo's introductions were being held.

"Okay?" Ranma asked.

Kasumi began speaking with only the occasional break for breath or take a drink of tea and steady herself.

"These two are Sanri and Unri, they were the household servants of a Lady whose name I couldn't catch. They are identical twins except for the eye color, and they were due to be sacrificed to some sort of spider-goddess in a little over a week. Said sacrifice to start off with their eyes being put out, their faces scarred, knives driven through their limbs into the altar to hold them in place, and eventually to having their hearts cut out of their bodies."

Soun swallowed nervously. "Truly?"

Kasumi nodded. "They staged an escape and planned on making their way to the surface world where they'd heard some priestesses of a dancing elf were supposedly operating. When they reached the surface they were attacked by uruk-hai who would have tortured them with hot irons and then minced them up to make a stew out of their flesh and decorative objects from their bones."

"Which is when I found them," guessed Ranma.

"Yes. They have now sworn themselves to be your clan retainers," said Kasumi.

"So, is that real gold?" Nabiki asked.

Kasumi asked a question. Sanri answered. Kasumi nodded at several points.

"Well?" Nabiki asked.

"It's real gold, some of it enchanted, that they stole in order to buy passage once they'd reached the surface world," said Kasumi.

* * *

_Elsewhere:_

"What of those two?" Matron Redwidow demanded.

"It looks like they managed to escape only to run into some orcs, we're... interrogating the survivors. They so far speak of some human warrior who fought bare handed. A Sorcerer perhaps as he apparently cast some odd weather related spell during the combat." The woman kneeling knew better than to look directly at the Matron of the House. Life in Menzonobarren was not for the weak of heart.

Matron Redwidow eased her thick frame onto the throne, idly stroking the thighbone that served as one armrest. One of her favored mates, he'd been, and continuing to serve her now. "I've already got a few looking for them. How they managed to get past my wards, I don't know. How many of the others are still missing?"

"Twelve, but they have left trails we can follow," said the soldier. "The two are more concerning because their trail vanishes abruptly."

"Then he likely was some powerful Sorcerer or Mage," said the Matron. "In which case the clerics may be needed to track them down."

"We have contacted our best mage tracker," admitted the soldier. "A minor demon we've used before. The book and the traitor's heads will be returned to you if Felsx will suffice."

"Good, it would be best to deal with this problem with our own resourcesonly," said the Matron. "Oh, and Lessika? If at all possible, capture this sorcerer. If he has mastered such magic, then he would be a useful tool in the Games of the Houses. Hmmm. If we catch those other escapees, perhaps we should use them as bait. If this is indeed one of those human 'heroes' that will be a target they cannot resist."

* * *

Ranma sat back in the furo, relaxing as the sore muscles of yet another day were soothed by the hot soak.

"(Ah. Here he is. Look. They are civilized. A hot bath.)"

Ranma stared as the two black-skinned, white-haired, elves stripped off their costumes and put them to the side. "uhm. excuse me?"

Sanri looked over the area where suds and water still covered the floor. "(How do you suppose... oh I get it! Look, you turn this knob here and the water jets out of this metal hose. How clever!)"

Unri nodded. "(I'll get your back first.)"

"uhm... excuse me?!"

"(Master seems distressed about something.)" Unri noted.

Sannri nodded. "(I'll go get that Kasumi girl.)"

Ranma's eyes tracked the one girl leave the bathroom, while the other seemed to be singing some wordless tune as she figured out how to lather and rinse.

"EEEK!"

Ranma heard Akane and figured that his pounding would commence at any moment. Why him? Even when he was doing what he thought was the right thing, he'd get punished.

"(We need you to translate for us,)" said Sanri as she led Kasumi into the room.

"Oh my," said Kasumi as she stared at a bathing Ranma.

"RANMA YOU PERVERT! HEY! Would someone get out of the way so I can pound Ranma?"

"Bwee?" said P-chan.

Akane finally got past Nabiki and Kasumi. "What do you think you're... are those burns?"

Ranma sank lower into the bath as Unri and Sanri began scrubbing each other's backs.

Kasumi asked Sanri a question and heard a fairly long answer back.

Everyone who saw that twitch knew that Kasumi was about to reveal something that could shake her calm.

Kasumi swallowed and tried not to stare at the tiny pale lines that briefly showed as the one girl twisted to tighten the skin so that the marks would show better. "Sanri says the new burns are from the Uruk-hai that Ranma rescued them from. The old burns are from where Unri had been working as kitchen help and accidently broke a plate. She says the burns have mostly healed and when they began whipping her and breaking her fingers, they used healing potions to make sure the scarring was minimal."

"They were tortured for breaking a plate?" Akane asked.

Kasumi translated this and began to look quite ill when Sanri replied.

"If the priestesses hadn't planned on sacrificing them upon their reaching adulthood as unmarked twin virgins," said Kasumi, "they would have fared worse. Others that they knew took days to die if they so much as chipped a cup of the good dining set."

"Well, at least if they were wanted as virgins, they couldn't have been abused much," noted Nabiki. "Shouldn't they take that jewelry off?"

"aw c'mon," pleaded Ranma. "It's drafty in here."

Kasumi translated Nabiki's comment and heard a short reply. Kasumi responded more in depth and turned pale at the reply.

Nabiki didn't need a translation and her thoughts about the gold were momentarily stalled. "They were?! How old..."

Sanri apparently guessed the question as she made a gesture to indicate something that only came up to her knee.

Akane wandered off, all thoughts of punishing Ranma for staring at naked elfgirls booted out of her head by this development.

P-chan took off to try and comfort Akane. Naturally he found himself in the Furinkan High Gymnasium fifteen minutes later.

Nabiki clutched her stomach. Yes, she was a soulless mercenary. THIS was enough to momentarily distract her from what was going on.

Sanri and Unri pinned their hair back, finished washing, and climbed into the furo.

"(What's got them all upset?)" Unri asked as the other humans seemed to go into shock.

"(I don't know, I was just telling her about our childhood. Maybe humans do it differently?)"

"(Hey, Master's got a better physique than most of Matron Redwidow's flunkies. I bet I could bounce a gold piece off of that stomach.)" Unri smiled suggestively.

"oh hell," said Ranma, aware of two curvaceous girls in the tub with him. Now he couldn't sneak out. Not with this little... problem. At least they hadn't noticed.

"(Well, it's about time,)" said Sanri. "(I was beginning to wonder if it was dead down there.)"

"(Nice. A bit larger than I'd like but that's fine.)" Unri sat back in the hot water and "accidently" rubbed her leg against her Master's. "(Any idea why he acts like that?)"

"(Maybe he's heard about how the upperclass drow, particularly priestesses, routinely kill and mutilate their sexual partners?)" Sanri went with the most logical explanation, the concept of "shyness" being completely beyond them at this point.

"(That would explain a lot,)" admitted Unri.

"(I'll tell Kasumi that we're not the upperclass and we're his servants, so he doesn't have to worry about that,)" replied Sanri.

Kasumi had been reeling from one shock to another when Sanri began explaining something to her.

It took a few moments to penetrate what the girl was telling her in the language they shared even if neither was an expert at it. She was really beginning to get rattled as even her calm had limits.

"What is it this time?" asked Nabiki with some dread. She'd steal their gold tomorrow. Right now she was feeling a bit ill.

Akane stuck her head in the door, not really wanting to hear but also morbidly curious about what horrors Tolkein had NOT put in any books dealing with elves.

"According to Sanri, errr. I'm not sure but I think she's stating that the members of the ruling class of the city she came from..." Kasumi stood up abruptly. "Excuse me. I'm going to be ill."

The statement was enough. Nabiki, Akane, Soun, and Genma all filled in the blanks with torture and horror beyond imagining.

In other words they were mostly right but tailoring it out of their own personal nightmares, therefore it had more impact.

Ranma sighed in relief and tried to find a towel as enough of that penetrated that he no longer had to worry about any soldiers standing at attention as he left the tub.

* * *

Streetlamps exploded, darkness bubbled up in midair like an eruption of molten tar from an invisible volcano. The darkness streamed together and a form uncurled from that darkness.

Felsx sniffed the air and made a gagging noise.

The two drow were here, so was some magic-using little human worm. The problem was that the worm was here with hundreds of other pathetic mortal worms.

As a Retriever, Felsx didn't care for its drow masters. Not in the slightest. If it had a way to get back at them, it would take it. The bindings were pretty thorough though. Careless summoners did not last long among the Drow.

The huge spider scuttled away from the landing site. It was bound to try and capture the sorcerer who had taken the two slaves, and return with a particular book to the summoner. It could not stop and feast along the way on those screaming little mortals who saw it as it moved.

All in all it shouldn't take long. It had taken the precaution of enchanting itself especially strong with anti-magic wards, which lowered its defenses against nonmagical attacks but that was hardly a concern. Powerful mages never had anything nonmagical to defend themselves with, they always relied on spells. That's why Felsx had the Reflect Magic and Volley and Anti-Magic Shell spells running. Just pump the sorceror full of venom and return with him to the summoner before the sorcerer's heart beat one last time.

What could go wrong?

* * *

Grauf of the Redwidow House of the drow city of Menzonobarren had risen as high as it was possible for a male to rise within the matriarchal society.

Grauf had then been sacrificed to the spider-goddess for the good of the priestesses, currying favor as the Matron had in the past with especially worthy sacrifices.

As an archmage though, he'd made other plans.

A cloned body in stasis had been prepared in a hiding place. They had been ready for him to try transferring his essence to a lich or similar container - he wouldn't have been the first to try escaping the knife like that. Similarly a living cloned body was something they checked for before plunging the knife in. It wouldn't do to have a gift to Lolth not actually reach her.

Now he was a powerful mage but in a body that had been fabricated for just such an emergency.

So Grauf (formerly of Redwidow) was a powerful drow male archmage in the body of a golem made entirely of black basalt. A small "failed experiment" of his years ago that he'd shown as proof of his agile experimental mind. Nobody had been particularly impressed with the slender form of the stone golem, though the idea of making a stone golem that could move quickly and silently and hide in shadows had been well received at the time.

So the stone form of Grauf had snuck off before the looting of his laboratory had been completed. The thief that had died in the escape was assumed by all to have accidently set off the golem.

Nobody cared. Another "death by miscalculation" was added to the running score for the daily tallies.

Well, someone cared, actually. Grauf wasn't the most sentimental of folk, though amongst the drow of his city perhaps he was in the top ten - not that anyone would admit belonging to that list. He had actually grieved for a few moments that one of his children had been killed. Even if that particular girl had been nasty, shrewish, demanding, and just as splendid an example of viciousness as the drow usually produced.

There was something else that Grauf had noticed as he occasionally prowled the city after his death.

The drow were evil. Evil was a mainstay of the universe. He had no trouble with it - survival of the fittest and all that. If he'd heard the term before, he would have described it as evolution. The drow and their city were constantly trying to better themselves, the nastiest clawed their way to the top, and only those truly fit stayed there any length of time. It was the way of life.

The problem was that the drow had settled into infighting. While the species had betrayed him, killed him, and had in no way made his life pleasurable - it was the species of his birth.

Sentimentality.

After much thinking on the subject, Grauf had come to a simple conclusion. Left to itself and Lolth's directions, the drow would slaughter themselves in trying to attain their dominancy over themselves. What was needed was another path. The solutions were simple:

1) War could make the drow strong again, if they had an enemy truly threatening and powerful enough to stand against them. It was their pride and self-confidence that made the drow turn against each other, for where was the enemy that could challenge them? The problem that Grauf saw there was the finding of a threat that could challenge the mighty drow. (Grauf had a bit of racial pride himself.) Aboleth - not enough number and they tended towards the deeper and moister caverns. It might be possible to flood the Underdark and provide them access to caverns above, but that would produce other problems. Goblinkin - neither powerful enough nor organized enough. Deep Gnomes, Deep Dwarves - both races had some measure of skill and power, but they fell far short of what was needed. Mind Flayers - might work but they had their own problems and were not the easiest group to manipulate. Surface races - not powerful enough, though there were exceptional individuals. Likewise the demon races might form a suitable army to challenge the drow, getting their attention away from the Blood War would not be easy. 2) A complete change of pace. Something to threaten and challenge them but in a less open conflict. 3) A complete lifestyle change.

He was naturally most inclined to go with some sort of war. Who could the drow fight that wouldn't be a pushover? With their level of magic, summoned demonic allies, and the power of their patron goddess even the surface elves wouldn't last more than a decade.

Matron Redwidow had lost two more sacrifices, which to Grauf had indicated that his former House was on the skids. With the other escaped slaves, the total was closer to twenty.

While ruminating on this, Grauf had an epiphany.

The drow, particularly of his original House, had become decadent and it was only a matter of time before their strength began to fade. If the bickering grew too entrenched, they wouldn't even respond to an outside menace by uniting.

The black basalt body quickly slew three soldier women as they passed nearby, and divested them of equipment that could be used elsewhere. Then he animated the three as zombies with orders to continue marching as far as they could, setting them on a tunnel towards the surface.

The two who had escaped with the human, a minor mage/cleric and a warrior/thief. Not much to start with.

He'd watched in silence as a Retriever had been summoned and put on their trail, and he'd watched as the Retriever vanished.

He couldn't figure out where the human had taken the two girls, but he could certainly watch the path taken by the Retriever.

And if the Retriever returned defeated, perhaps he'd have the Enemy who could challenge the Drow.

* * *

"Fire SOUL!" Flames stabbed out at the spider-being and seemed to hit some barrier about two feet away.

"Look out!" Jupiter grabbed Mars in a sideways leap as eyebeams stabbed out. They touched a brick wall which then turned brittle and crystalline.

"Watch out for the eyebeams, they tranmute substances," called out Sailor Mercury.

The Retriever didn't like this. Mages of some kind coming out of nowhere. Yes, it had anticipated magical attacks and had cast protections, but it had been given a task by a particularly unforgiving individual and this was taking entirely too long. That one seemed to be a commander, so...

Mercury looked up from her computer in time to see a spray of white before it covered her.

"It's cocooning Mercury!" declared Jupiter. "Try this! Jupiter Thunder Crash!"

Lightning snapped out, and arced over to hit a girl in an orange skirt.

"Oopsie," said Jupiter.

Eyebeams stabbed out at the tall girl. In an eyeblink she seemed to become a golden statue. The statue cracked a moment later to reveal that her Senshi transformation had protected her, but she'd gotten very little air while imprisoned.

"Jupiter! Venus! Mercury! Rrrrr," growled Sailor Mars. "I'll get you for that! Akuryo Taisan!"

THIS the Retriever leapt away from, cursing in a high speed chitter. The protective spells had had to be modified for its spell resistance not to dissipate - and these odd magical attacks seemed to be randomly affected by those protective spells. That attack had been with spirit wards, which could potentially do some serious damage unlike the fire spells.

"I can't get a clear shot," yelped Sailor Moon as she yanked at an arm trapped by a loop of webbing.

"(Do you see that, Sanri?)"

"(It's a Retriever, Unri! My spells won't affect it and only magic weapons can hurt it.)"

All the fighting outside had drawn the inhabitants out.

"EEEK!" said Kasumi, not particularly liking spiders in the first place. Especially the giant, venom-dripping, fighting magical girls kind.

Nabiki managed to get a few pictures because she absolutely refused to consider what she was looking at. She'd panic later, thank you very much.

P-chan arrived, saw the fight going on, and started frantically looking for some hot water. This ended up taking him back to the Furinkan High School Gymnasium again, but his heart was in the right place.

"Aiyah!" Shampoo saw a giant bug and put the bonbori away. Swords were a lot quicker.

Ranma felt like pointing and exclaiming to the world. See! He was right! Monsters! Even when he brought elves back he could tell that the Tendo family was skeptical when he'd mentioned them earlier. Though this one was uglier even than the last group.

* * *

It was in Nerima.

It was not a martial artist.

It was not cute or fluffy.

It was taking hits - blasts of fire that didn't quite reach it.

"I've got it!" Akane yelled, running forward, anxious to prove that she was a martial artist and warrior and could beat monsters too!

"AAAAAaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAA!" yelled Akane as she was grabbed and slung around by one foreleg and that foreleg swung her close to where mandibles dripped green venom and opened wide.

It was a credible threat.

Ranma Saotome got serious about the fight.

The Retriever opened its jaws to permanently remove this warrior attacking it.

"Mouko Takabisha!" _Wham!_

Another attack that went past the Volley and Reflect Magic spells, and was barely stopped by a Protection spell that had been one of the first enchantments layered on. Of course, putting all that emphasis on magic defense lowered resistance to purely physical attacks but that was hardly a worry was it?

Ranma found a joint in an exoskeleton leg and kicked as hard as possible, shearing through it.

The Retriever turned, tossing the morsel aside to deal with this more credible threat.

Kasumi stared as kitchen knives began flying from the hands of the one named Unri to fly towards the eyes of the Retriever.

Sailor Moon wailed in terror as some girl with black skin and white hair came at her with a knife. As she swung the knife up. As she... cut the webbing still pinning that hand?

Sanri tried to smile at the cleric as she cut the girl free, then went over to get that coccooned one out before she suffocated.

Sailor Moon stared as one of the evil Dark General types... was one of the good guys. Oh right. Better get back to the fight!

The Retriever found itself confronted with the two girls it was to kill and the male that it was supposed to bring back alive. The task seemed to be getting progressively more difficult as time went on.

"Moon Tiara Action!"

Two legs down, the Retriever tried wrapping the one girl with webbing, then using eyebeams on the wildly dodging male who had taken off the other limb.

Ranma used a flailing limb as a parallel bar, bounced off the creature's back, bounced off a limb on the other side, and realized that creature's back didn't have a whole lot of defense. Relatively. Happy joy.

Sailor Mercury stared at the dark elf rescuing her before she said something apparently unhappy and went back to try and cut Sailor Moon out of a cocoon. Sailor Moon?!

"Fire So URK!" Sailor Mars went flying, tagged by a flailing limb as the damn big spider tried to get rid of someone who had landed on top of it and was now hitting it repeatedly at very high speeds.

"Aiyah! They grow spiders big here!" Shampoo said, arriving and summing up her reaction.

"A demon-spider, well now, I haven't seen one of those in..." Cologne began trying to remember, idly dodging a stray eyebeam. "I forget. Well, age catches up with all of us sooner or later."

Ukyo saw the stray eyebeam coming at her and blocked with a spatula. "AHHHHH! It turned my spatula into gold! AHHhhhh... ?! Oh. Well I can always get a new one."

Kodachi and Tatewaki Kuno arrived. Naturally their reactions were a bit different.

"So the foul sorcerer Saotome doth consort with demon spiders from the very pit of Hell! I shall -" _Schlumpf_

As Tatewaki Kuno was sprayed with webbing and thereby shut up, many of those not participating in the battle politely applauded.

"It's beautiful," said Kodachi, admiring the strange creature. "Yet I must destroy it anyway for threatening my Ranma-sama!" Her ribbon whipped out to wrap around a leg.

_Zwoop!_ The foreleg moved rapidly as the spider scuttled around in a quick circle. Kodachi went flying.

"Eeeeeekkkkk!" Kodachi managed as she saw a brick wall looming in her future. So this was it she was going to die. Her life passing before her eyes. _Grab!_ or maybe not.

There was still a stunning impact, but Kodachi fought off the daze to behold her rescuer. A woman in what was obviously a borrowed nightshirt, her long white hair unbound and the gleaming ebony of her skin evident as were the pointed ears from...

Kodachi managed an "oh my" before falling unconscious.

Ranma's legs locked him in place as the spider tried to dislodge him. Five hundred strikes. Eight hundred strikes. One thousand strikes.

Sailor Moon blinked up at the elfgirl cutting her out of the webbing. "Hi. I'm Sailor Moon, warrior of love and justice?"

The elf said something in another language.

Sailor Jupiter recovered enough to leap into the fight. Whoa! Look at that guy pounding on the monster. Reminded her of her old sempai!

Sailor Moon stood back and began her windup. It was obvious she'd need her strongest attack. She needed to end this quick before anyone else got hurt!

Sanri had freed the clumsy cleric again. Something told her that the girl wasn't a follower of Lolth, but some other faith. Maybe it would be one that could use another priestess, she was out of clerical scrolls and being a generalist cleric/mage of Toril meant being cut off from one spell source while she was here.

Ranma's hands were getting sore. Twelve hundred strikes. Fourteen hundred strikes.

The Retriever shrieked in a pitch that broke windows as its back plates began splintering. Something that shouldn't have been possible from a purely physical assault, but the male human was charging his fists with energy and hitting so fast it sounded like a continual roll of thunder.

Sailor Moon needed this at full power and wasn't sure where it came from. "Moon Healing Escalation!"

* * *

They blinked, the wash of purification energies slamming into them.

Sailor Moon hadn't held back, knowing her attacks didn't hurt her allies normally and not considering that it might have an effect on people who weren't exactly normal.

Unri had been ready to get up from where she'd saved the allied rogue (judging from the sneaky manner, whip weapon, and tight dancing outfit - Unri had thought her a kindred spirit) when suddenly the world turned to white light.

Sanri had been helping up the human with the red skirt when suddenly it was the human supporting her and not the other way around.

Ranma finished breaking through the spider's back plating when everything turned white and he felt this calm warmth flush through him.

Nabiki felt as though a big pink crystal heart had just whupped her upside the head and she fell over without a sound.

P-chan wandered in, anxious to get into the fight when everything turned white and he felt oddly at peace for some reason.

Soun continued to search the nearest canal for a sign of Akane, sure that she'd flown this way.

Kasumi and Kodachi were both unconscious and if the attack had any effect on them, they didn't immediately display it.

Sailor Mars had just exchanged smiles with some sort of dark elf when Sailor Moon's attack hit and it looked like the elf had been in pain

A panda continued to hide, far enough away that giant spiders couldn't get him.

Happosai continued to raid panties in Juuban.

The Senshi blinked as Sailor Moon's attack seemed more potent than usual for some reason, though all it really did was leave them feeling slightly refreshed.

Akane started running as she realized from that bright flash that the fight was still going on! Though she'd ended up landing in Gosunkugi's bedroom and frankly was going to have to have a word with voodoo boy about that photo album when everything was done.

The Senshi stared at the after-effects, as the light finally died.

* * *

"(Ouch. What hit me?)" Unri asked. "(I feel like I just went a couple of rounds with Vesk.)"

"(That was the ogrillon the Mistress used to punish slackers, wasn't it?)" Sanri said.

"(That's the one.)" Unri affirmed, slowly getting up out of the bedroll thrown onto the floor. "(You're not going to believe what happened.)"

"(Your burns and scars vanished?)" Sanri asked, pulling on a shirt. "(Mine too.)"

"(Have you checked this stuff out?)" Unri asked as she tugged on her own shirt. "(This cloth they make these garments from?)"

"(It's cloth, what about it?)" Sanri looked at it a couple of times but shrugged. "(Sort of like silk. What do you think?)"

"(Isn't that the Master's shirt and pants and slippers?)" Unri asked. "(I'm pretty sure humans are gender specific on clothing. A lot of races are. That's not the point though. These are made with plant fibers but they're woven so tightly and the fabric is so soft - this'd be worth quite a lot as a trade item.)"

Sanri shrugged and took off the Master's clothing, inspecting her sister. The white t-shirt contrasted starkly against the skin but matched the hair. "(Don't you normally prefer darker clothing?)"

"(If I could find it, I would. Yech. Are these human fashions? They're all bright colors and it's all so bright anyway.)"

"(I'm getting back to studying my spells,)" said Sanri. "(We ought to tally our loot soon too.)"

"(Were those mages, clerics, or what?)" Unri discarded clothing if she couldn't figure out what it was or if it was too bright a color. "(When did Master get up, anyway?)"

"(Shortly after dawn,)" answered Sunri. "(As to the ones of multihued skirts - I've no idea. Now if you don't mind, I want as many Comprehend Languages memorized as I can.)"

* * *

Matron Redwidow's nails clacked against one of the bones comprising her chair and she looked disturbed. "The sorcerer killed a Retriever?"

"Not only that but there was a powerful magical backlash," said the priestess, not at all concerned with how poorly the news was being received by such a minor House. "The summoner of the beast is screaming something about the moon and pink hearts. Insane, obviously. My superiors warn you, Matron, they will not tolerate you involving the city in some massive scheme."

"Unless they profit from it," agreed Matron Redwidow. "I have my own priestesses and they will be sending a Yochlol after the slaves."

The priestess frowned. "Using one of Lolth's handmaidens to go after two escaped slaves? Can't you just send a few hireswords?"

"No, they defeated a Retriever - one of great power and no small intelligence that had hunted down mages before. This Sorcerer may be a threat to the city."

The priestess stared for a moment before laughing. It was exactly the sort of scornful mocking laugh that one would expect from a drow. No humor was involved. "A Sorcerer. Possibly an adventuring group. Pose a threat to this city? To the jewel of Lolth's crown?"

"Besides, it was a full twenty slaves - not just these two. The comeliest of females that I'd managed to collect, all held for later sacrifice to Her Darkness." protested Matron Redwidow.

"Spare me your fascination with such things, " said the priestess. "Everyone looks mainly the same when you've stripped the skin off. You've been warned, Matron. Do not embarass us or disgrace the goddess."

* * *

Twenty slaves had escaped. Four had died. Two had escaped with the sorcerer.

Grauf looked over the remainder. Fourteen of Redwidow's slaves who had run far but not far enough.

Once activity had died out on the surface, he could take these slaves and send them along the path that the Retriever had gone. Except that when they left, one would bear a simple torc that he could attune his thoughts to and spy on from afar.

* * *

"Hi guys," chirped Usagi. "Ami, it's lunch, you shouldn't be studying so much!"

"Ami has found something very interesting, Usagi," said Makoto.

"Interesting?" Usagi asked, not really interested. Considering it was Ami it was probably a studyholic support group.

Ami turned her computer around so that Usagi could see the picture on the monitor. "Look familiar?"

"That's them!" Usagi exclaimed. "Except those two didn't have that..."

"Nasty cruel vicious look?" Makoto supplied.

"Yeah," agreed Usagi. "What's all that to the side?"

"This is from an American game called Dungeons & Dragons which has an extensive story setting." Ami turned the computer around, brought up another picture, then turned it towards Usagi again. "How about this?"

"That's the youma! Sort of," agreed Usagi.

"Exactly," said Ami. "Just like those two last night were not quite the same as those in this picture. Indicating the game connection isn't 100% accurate but provides some details that are missing. Those two elves are called 'drow' or 'dark elves' and they are from a race of evil creatures who destroy and dominate everything they encounter."

"...I didn't really get that impression from those two..." hedged Usagi, not wanting to believe that more friends of theirs would turn out to be Dark Kingdom Generals or something.

"No, I don't think so either," agreed Ami. "Do you remember what that one woman told us when we asked?"

"After I paid her five hundred yen," complained Makoto.

"That the boy with the pigtail had rescued them and they had declared themselves in his debt," provided Ami.

"Don't tell me my new sempai, err, that boy," corrected Makoto, "is some sort of Dark General."

Ami was about to point out that the boy was two years older than Makoto when she considered Usagi and Mamoru. "No. Quite the opposite actually. He seemed mildly stunned by Usagi's attack. The two elves were more affected, possibly because they are more attuned to magic."

"Opposite of a Dark General," mused Makoto. As they had only faced Beryl before, they didn't have a lot of experience in this. "That would mean he's... AN ALLY!"

"Shhhhh," said Ami, trying to point out that the two bouncing up and down laughing wasn't exactly going to go unnoticed.

"Ami-chan, we died facing Beryl," said Makoto. "Before we die again, I want to get some hot stud loving... I mean some allies who can back us up in a battle! Yeah - that's what I meant!"

Usagi nodded happily. "Where's Minako, anyway?"

"Reading the 'Lord Of The Rings' trilogy," answered Ami. "I wonder if it will have any relevant information?"

* * *

"GRAGHHH!" said the orc (or uruk-hai if you prefer), tugging painfully on the chain that led to the cuffed hands of the first prisoner. Which lead to the second and so on, down to the thin chains on the pixie at the end.

His orders had come from a highly placed one of the drow, so even when the drow in question looked a little different, he knew better than questioning the orders. He liked his skin where it was, thank you.

Just stand here and wait for a contact, occasionally whipping or beating on these stupid elves.

So far all he'd seen so far was some pig, but that couldn't be what he was looking for. Ah well. He was getting hungry. Maybe he'd just slice this one elf girl's leg off. She didn't need it anyway.

**_Wham!_**

Ryoga flicked his umbrella to the side as the really really ugly monster guy fell over. "Maybe this was one of the monsters Ranma was talking about? Curse you Ranma! You missed one! I..."

The Lost Boy noticed the elf women. The darn near naked elf women. The chained up looked pretty damn cute for being foreigners, he hadn't met Akari yet in this timeline, frightened elf women. Oh and a pixie and whatever that other gal was. But they were pretty cute too!

Naturally Ryoga thought back to a conversation he'd had with Ranma just yesterday.

"Ever have one of those days, P-chan, when you saved a couple of girls from monsters and then they followed you everywhere?"

"Curse you Ranma!" Ryoga yelled. "Now you're involving me in these... uhm sorry." He'd noticed the cringing elves, a couple looked like they'd been beaten recently. Looked like loud noises were cause for alarm. How to get them to stop cringing? "Oh I know."

Ryoga went around, breaking chains and removing handcuffs, which had the effect of calming down the girls.

"There you go," Ryoga declared. "Uhm, why are you all looking at me like that?"

Everyone wanted to hug their hero, and more than one wanted to check out all those tight muscles.

What a pity that he seemed to faint halfway through it.

* * *

The idea of Kodachi leaving Gymnastics practice early? Unheard of! That she was distracted the whole time through had been noted though, and more than one of the girls expressed the hope that it wasn't something she had done.

Kodachi sighed as she scanned the shelves of the library. Elves.

Ever since that battle with the giant spider, she'd felt "off" somehow. Many of the things that had seemed so important just the day before had dwindled in importance. Having been unconscious for a large amount of the fight, Kodachi could only come to one conclusion.

It had been the elves. So graceful and precise, with that otherworldly beauty. Even her own grace and poise seemed but a guttural echo of how they turned every movement into something of beauty.

The elves had fought alongside her against a very demon from Hell. How trivial was a concern for an upcoming match against another women's school compared to such as that?

Yet it was odd that in a way she felt better than she had felt in years. Cleansed somehow. The elves again?

Those odd cheerleaders throwing magic about. The spider-thing. Her Ranma-sama leaping to the fray.

Had she kept her eyes closed all her life, blinded to the greater struggles around her?

Turning away from the books, which seemed to deal with yousei strictly within the Japanese mythos, Kodachi decided a visit to those elves might be necessary to settle the questions and doubts sifting through her head.

* * *

Tatewaki Kuno was having a hard time of it as well.

"Sasuke!" The scion of House Kuno commanded.

Popping up from a floor panel, the bucktoothed ninja saluted. "You called your eminence?"

Dropping down from where'd suddenly found himself clutching the ceiling, Kuno coughed into his hand and regained what composure he could. "The battle last night, Sasuke?"

"I'm sorry, Master Kuno, but I was doing the laundry last night," apologized Sasuke.

"Yes, I understand that," said Kuno, waving the point off. "There were five girls in figure skating costumes, save that they had no skates upon their feet. They did fight with impressive skills and their countenance was most fair to look upon."

"Maybe they were combat cheerleaders? I've heard of those," mused Sasuke.

"Perhaps indeed," said Kuno approvingly. "Their uniforms bore vague resemblence to sailor style seifuku such as are worn at many a girl's school."

Sasuke started writing this down. "Five girls. Skating or cheerleading costumes, sailor style. Martial artists."

"Get me the names of these paragons of beauty, and perhaps a set of 8x10 pictures," said Kuno, dismissing the diminuitive ninja.

Sasuke sighed. "Might I draw on the Kuno family funds?"

Kuno nodded. "Yes, you may have to go to Nabiki on this. You may draw 1000 yen."

Sasuke winced. That might cover names, he'd have to go get the pictures on his own. A ninja's work is never done.

* * *

"Great grandmother! I back!" Shampoo proclaimed as she leapt through the door.

"Good child, in the meantime I want you to not fight those elves son-in-law has." Cologne inspected the contents of a pot, not looking up at Shampoo. "The same with those cheerleaders."

"Why for? Is obstacle?" Shampoo asked.

"What is my first duty as matriarch?" Cologne asked.

"Is for good of tribe," said Shampoo, knowing this by heart.

"Son In Law has two elves who have sworn him fealty," said Cologne, lowering the heat on the sauce. "Last night they fought a monster."

"Yes, is so," said Shampoo, still not seeing the point.

"It looks like son-in-law is about to engage in an Epic Quest," said Cologne. "Different rules apply to those."

* * *

Ryoga took a few steps, glanced over his shoulder, then blushed at all the giggling and turned back to the path ahead of him.

So he had a bunch of blonde giggly underdressed elves, a pixie, some human-sized winged gal, another elf who had greenish hair and gills (?!), and some girl with four arms.

They kept looking at him, giggling, feeling his muscles, and other stuff.

"Ranma Saotome! Somehow this is all your fault!" Ryoga said as the pixie landed on his shoulder and started making odd noises as she hugged his neck. "Thanks to you I keep getting cuddled by nearly naked women! Waitaminute. That didn't sound right. Thanks to you I've seen cute elf... no. That doesn't work in this situation either."

Meanwhile the rescued prisoners continued to follow the wandering hero, speculating whether he was a paladin (which would explain his reluctance to accept their thanks) or a ranger (because he seemed to be lacking in armor) or perhaps something they'd never heard of before. Obviously he was some noble sort of hero to go rescuing them! Perhaps he was leading them to his Lord?

* * *

"Hello Kasumi. Would you please get us something so we can get the basics of your language down?" Sanri asked.

"You're speaking Japanese?!" Kasumi was noticeably startled by this.

"Not quite, I'm using a translation spell," explained Sanri. "The problem is that it only lasts a short time."

"Oh," said Kasumi, thinking. "So maybe some children's books?"

"That would probably work to start," agreed Sanri. "We also will require instruction on how to assist in your duties here in the Master's home."

"Oh, but Ranma doesn't own this home," corrected Kasumi. "He's a guest here."

"Perhaps you could explain while the spell is still going?" asked Sanri. "I'd like to learn more about Ranma."

* * *

Akane glanced at Ranma in the classroom, and caught Ukyo doing the same. She turned her attention back to the textbook before the teacher could catch on.

Last night had been bizarre. Even for the standards that had developed a few months ago when Ranma had come on a rainy day in March.

Ranma had been late for dinner. Unusual.

Ranma had shown up with two darkskinned lighthaired elven refugees from what sounded like an Evil Empire. Several steps beyond unusual.

That dance. No, forget about the dance. Do not go there. Nope. Fast forward past THAT.

Bath scene. Uhm. Better fast forward past that. Seeing Ranma bathe set off all sorts of pervert alarms for some reason.

More revelations about where the elves had come from not sounding like Happy Fairyland.

Giant Spider Monster. Urban legends coming out of Juuban to fight the monster. Ranma getting involved. Being thrown all the way to... oh yeah.

Akane turned to Gosunkugi. "After class." _krick crack_

Okay maybe cracking her knuckles hadn't been the most feminine thing to do.

Back to last night. Battle ends. Spider bites the dust. Everyone goes home.

Except something had changed while she'd been thrown all the way to Gosunkugi's bedroom and the resulting slow hike back.

This morning, Ranma had been quieter than usual. Nabiki had looked haggard and hadn't been hungry. Kasumi had been humming some odd song.

There was also, and Akane couldn't believe she was the only one to think of this, the possibility of the Evil Empire coming after those two. Just her luck there'd be yet another magical prince kidnapper. After Kirin and Touma - she'd had her fill of such things, thank you very much.

Akane spent a few minutes looking at Ranma, trying to figure out what was different about him. At least until the teacher bounced a piece of chalk off her forehead.

* * *

_Prime:_

"What is it with these dark elves anyway?" asked Ranma.

"They come from a particularly bad background, so even associating with you is a step up," said the Raven.

"Gee thanks," said Ranma as sarcastically as possible.

"Anytime," acknowledged the Raven.


	9. Chapter 9: Setsuna's Fault - dragons?

_Prime:_

"So you guys monkey with timelines like that? People's lives?" asked Ranma, a bit hostile.

"In some cases, yes," said the Raven without any shame. "In the majority of cases, no. And in some cases we just try to stabilize things."

* * *

Son of Omake  
chapter 9: Setsuna's Fault

Originally appeared at the Anime Addventure, but many people have stated it's easier to read stories like this here at Fanfiction. Copyrights belong to the original copyright holders. The OOC of Setsuna is mainly due to the idea of a psychic connection to the Gates as they appear in other stories (in canon you don't actually see enough of them to make any conclusions about their limitations and abilities) and therefore this story is NOT completely adherent to the Sailor Moon manga.

Some segments by me, others by Jamil Nate, some by Kender_Sci.

* * *

Ranma overheard talking and decided to leave the Raven to his own thing for now. What he saw was something bizarre. Even by his standards. Even of lately.

* * *

"What about these Sen Chi?" said Tennyson, beholder god of the philosophy of "Live & Let Live", and a member of the Rival Relief Office.

"As I understand it," said the semi-divine being (third class) known as Mambo Jack, "these SM tagged timelines all involve a Silver Millenium, usually involving a Moon Kingdom. In most of them, the kingdom falls due to a certain unrequited love affair and the presence of a Class III (subclass: Vampiric) Entity named Metal'la. There's a major juncture point in these SM timelines where the Silver Crystal is first used to gather up the various heroes and send them forth to be reborn in another millenium."

"So these are standard timelines," said the beholder, focussing three eyes on Jack and two on his dim sum, while the rest rested. "Essentially the Crystal grants her wish as a magic lamp would."

"Pretty much. Roughly seven out of ten will have the wording just right so that the forces of darkness and light are basically in the same roles they were back at the end of the Silver Millenium. This is what usually happens: sentai magical princesses versus one set of vampiric or minor demonic opponents."

"Don't they have better armor?" Tennyson asked. "Human flesh tends to accumulate injuries when not armored."

"Uhm. No. Not typically of an epic fantasy setting," admitted Jack. "Anyway. Out of a hundred, ten will have it so that the groups are still heroes and villains reborn - but neither Dark Kingdom or Moon Kingdom. Those are the ones with superpowered teenage mutants or more Western style superheroes as opposed to the mystic sentai-style types of the Moon Kingdom. Another ten percent, roughly, will have the Silver Millenium champions be absolutely normal people. In those, if their opponents show up their world ends shortly thereafter or other champions arise."

"What of the remainder?" Tennyson asked.

"Real weird stuff, caused by a miscasting of the spell or the terms being lousily set," Jack admitted. "The Millenium Crystal, after all, is essentially a device to grant wishes, with the emotional or spiritual strength of the user being the battery it draws on. And you *know* how wild wishes can get. So in some: the Senshi are superpowered vampires, or Princess Usagi's birth gets thrown off by a decision to freeze the fertilized ovuum until the Tsukino family gets their finances under better control, or they're children of the gods, or something *really* bizarre like the one where they're superpowered android teenaged girls, or even the one where they're pokemon. Pokewomen. Whatever."

"Hmm, so what's this one now that that one Senshi's mucked things up with the paradox storm?" Tennyson focussed most of his eyes on the display.

"Too many paradoxes, too much time travel, all intersecting in a chaos node with a known harbinger of chaos," said Mambo Jack. "The universe moved to correct itself, and Sailor Pluto well and truly FUBARed the situation. Looks like the new reality is in flux. She's still trying to get things to go back to the original path, but she's connected to those Time Gates. The more she alters the timeline, the more the Gates are damaged and the more her connection to those Gates causes her obsession to get more insane in levels."

"Oh. Feedback loop. Those can be nasty," said Tennyson.

* * *

Seeing the line of change extending all the way back to the Sailor Wars and knowing exactly how much that could change things, Sailor Pluto fought.

Her own powers increased and decreased in power wildly, the timeline shifted around like a bucking horse, and the very nature of her tools in that fight altered during it.

At one point she was Setsuna Meow, Binekoshojo Sailor Pluto, Guardian of Cuddle Time and able to handle the power flow clearly. A moment later and she was _homo habilis_ and wondering where the savannah had gone.

Finally though, panting and exhausted, Setsuna felt things jell. Like an earthquake - the timequake had not released all its energy but it was simply sitting at a rest point.

From there she could tie it off for now. It looked like the _now_ just required her to make one tiny little adjustment for it to be perfect.

* * *

Setsuna checked and did a little dance around the Time Gates. She was not in a harem, no keys turning on her back, nobody got any sex, nobody had tails, nobody got engaged, nobody had any boyfriends!

She popped in where the Inners were meeting with Hotaru and having a study session. She quickly looked them over, getting their attention incidently, then began her happy dance again.

"What's going on?" Usagi asked, all smiles.

"He's dead! Dead! Deaddeaddeaddead! I had to go back and kill him when he was five years old but he's DEAD!"

"He must have been a very bad person," said Usagi, astonished to see Pluto so happy.

"No more fiance, no more engagements, no boyfriends," said Setsuna, doing a little jig. "Ranma Saotome is GONE!"

"Excuse me?" Usagi, Minako, Makoto, Rei, Hotaru, and Ami asked in an odd harmony.

"The timestream got messed up by a boy who unintentionally got a harem, then he tried to save your lives, well he succeeded, but in the doing got his life tangled up with yours and it took encouraging his father and then adding a rabid cat to the ones that his father was feeding him to - but he's dead at last!" Setsuna said amongst giggles. She'd beaten the fates! She'd fixed the timeline!

"Wow, I guess this compulsory truth charm works," said Rei, holding up something.

"I ended up in a harem?" asked Minako, astonished.

"Don't worry, it's all over now," said Setsuna. "You don't end up in any relationship, living loveless and alone until it finally breaks you and you join up with Usagi's harem but you still mainly get pushed to the side and neglected. Even Artemis dumps you eventually."

"Oh... how nice..." said a twitching Minako. "A loveless champion of love. Just what I always wanted to be... NOT."

"It's necessary for Crystal Tokyo," Setsuna assured her. "All of you end up pretty much in the same boat, driven together with no one else to confide in or care about until you're all pretty much dependent on Usagi and emotional wrecks who have chosen a lesbian harem arrangement out of sheer desperation for some kind of human connection."

"I'm beginning to wish we had that a lot earlier," said Ami, eyeing Rei's charm. "This explains a lot."

"Uhm, I've got a question," said Usagi. "If Ranma's dead, then how could he be Hotaru's sempai?"

Setsuna stared at Usagi, the carefree attitude falling away like water off a duck's back. "Excuse me?"

"You said Ranma Saotome's dead? Isn't that the name of your sempai, Hotaru-chan?" Usagi asked innocently.

"Unnnn," said Hotaru. "Except he's my sensei."

Setsuna began twitching. "No. It couldn't be. He's dead. DEAD! HE CAN'T BE ALIVE!"

"Come to think of it, I haven't met your sensei," said Minako, watching to see if Setsuna was about to completely melt down. "So he's named 'wild horse' - I wonder..."

"He couldn't have survived," said the wild eyed Setsuna, apparently to herself. "I went into the past to when his father was teaching him the Catfist. Use more cats I told him. Starve them more. Use this cat, even though he's foaming at the mouth. That just means he's fiercer. HE CAN'T BE ALIVE!"

"Setsuna-san," said Usagi sweetly. "Exactly what sort of measures do you normally take in your duties as Guardian of the Time Gates?"

Setsuna had a facial twitch going. Minako was immediately reminded of Inspector Dreyfus from the Pink Panther movies.

Hotaru frowned and got up, quickly crossing over to Setsuna. "GET AHOLD OF YOURSELF!" (_SLAP!_)

"NOOOOOOOO!" This seemed to freak out Setsuna even further.

"So, is your sensei cute?" Minako asked Hotaru.

"AAAAAAAA!" said Setsuna, vanishing.

"That was cruel, Minako-chan," said Rei, shaking her head.

Minako blinked several times, looking puzzled before turning to Hotaru again. "Well, is he?"

* * *

Sailor Pluto heard the groan from the Gates Of Time and winced at the sight of the little cracks in the surface, but had to see. She had to know.

Yes, there was the little boy thrown to the cats. There were more cats being thrown in. Including the rabid one. There were cats dying, the boy screaming in pain as his flesh was bitten and torn.

Sailor Pluto fast forwarded. That had worked out, so why wasn't he DEAD?!

* * *

Ranma Saotome was a fighter.

Having been thrown tied up in a pit filled with hungry cats (plus a rabid one) in an insane plan to learn a banned technique, he had somehow against all odds survived despite his father's criminal stupidity and Pluto's meddling.

When the authorities arrived on the scene, the child they found was a bloody mess, holding on life by sheer stubborness and anger. Missing limbs, torn flesh, blood loss, infected by rabies and other infections, his left eye teared up from its socket, internal injuries... It was a miracle Ranma was still alive.

The young boy slipped in a coma shortly after his addmittance at the Hospital. Surgeons fought for days to keep him alive and stabilize his condition. His heart stopped three times in all and took more time and energy to restart.

When Ranma woke up, it was to hear his own father (who had come to take him back in the darkness of night) disown and abandon him for being a weakling and hopeless cripple. His scream of anguish alerted the nurse, prompting Genma's escape.

It took years for Ranma to recover from his ordeal but it was obvious that he would never be able to practice martial arts again, much less fight at all. Heavy duty physical and psychological therapy had been necessary for him to regain a modicum of autonomy and function in Society.

The final straw came when her mother had been found. After a cursory glance at her crippled son, she declared him unmanly and ordered him to prepare himself for seppuku. Needless to say, Ranma's remaining hopes were crushed. Nodoka Saotome was arrested and sent into an asylum. The Police continued to search for Genma but the martial artist/thief always escaped pursuit.

Ranma's story moved certain people so much that he was declared a ward of the State until his majority.

Deprived of martial arts and pretty much any physical activity, Ranma Saotome turned his energy toward learning and education, almost to the point of obsession.

Martial arts had destroyed Ranma. In their name, he had been put under untold abuse and suffering, culminating in his near death and his current state. The Art itself and all the mystical nonsense associated with it became an evil thing in his broken mind.

The search for knowledge became his salvation. Science, medicine and logic had saved his life and allowed him to regain a few bits of what he'd lost. Throwing himself in his studies, he put his intelligence, eidetic memory and capacity for learning into a totally different direction now.

Ranma Saotome the martial artist was dead. Long live Ranma Saotome the scholar.

And even if it was almost non-existant, there was a hope Ranma would find a way to repair the damages made to his body by the Neko-Ken training.

Years passed. Ranma turned into a somewhat misanthropic and bitter young man who lived only for his research. He bonded with Hotaru Tomoe because they had things in common: being physically handicapped and shunned by others. Ranma was her sempai _and_ sensei, tutoring her in various subjects. Her grades had increased significantly thanks to him, she came second to Ami several times during the last tests (which angered Setsuna even more, Hotaru wasn't supposed to be the same age as Usagi and the others, much less be in the same class).

Sailor Pluto twitched and felt a headache forming. What did it take to get rid of that boy!? She looked closer and was surprised by one thing. Ranma wasn't a normal student even if he was the best at what he did(natch), no.

Ranma Saotome was well known in certain circles as a genius. He had access to a Science far beyond anything that existed. The government who was paying for all of this gladly did, getting their hands on advanced technology straight out of Science-Fiction.

Apparently, Ranma, while being a typical 'comic-book' scientist (the likes of Gina Diggers, Reed Richards, Doctor Doom, etc...) and as such a jack-of-all-trades, had a specialty field where he was the World's undisputed master.

* * *

Ranma had taken technology from Mugen Gakuen. He had developed his own technologies and patched them with this stuff that Professor Tomoe had come up with.

Biotechnology combined with magical forces.

Evil influences were filtered out. He was creating monsters, of a sort, but not the evil sort. Avoid especially not the evil turns-on-the-creator sort. This was all weird mad science, but nobody said he had to be like a scientist in one of those Michael Creighton books and have an Intelligence score of High and a Wisdom score of Feeble. Nope.

Lightning crackled between electrodes, beakers bubbled, whirly-things whirled, a DVD of "Young Frankenstein" played in the background (considering this was 1992 - this was an especially clever accomplishment), and a disco light swayed. Not because any of this was necessary for the procedure to work, they were just atmosphere. It was a lot more dramatic this way and Ranma liked the effect.

Instead of the "withered pumpkin" seeds of the "Eggs Of Daimon" - Ranma had come up with eggs. The tricky part was the time before hatching, you had to use an incubator and all sorts of equipment. Now though his long work would pay off!

The first egg hatched, and a form that was cute and fuzzy slowly uncurled from its rest - born now with the knowledge imprinted into its psyche that Ranma was to be protected and cared for. Not only that, but if something happened to him - the newly born creature would go on to serve Hotaru.

The new beast was designed for power, versatility, and looking really damn cool. He called it a 'dragon.'

* * *

The beast might not have been actually that 'fuzzy', but it counted enough. It was small enough to be seen in that way, and wasn't at all frightening. Of course, it probably could be, but as with most things when just born, it more... cute than scary.

Of course, when it stood on unsteady legs and blinked at its creator, it really looked like something that a girl could get into.

But it was still a dragon.

Ranma had decided to go with the idea once he'd realised that 'cute and fuzzy' might not be the best thing to go with. After all, there weren't many bunnies and such that actually instilled any sort of respect. One took such beings, and cuddled them. What he wanted was something that could be seen and immediately taken seriously. This was not something to stand on the sidelines and give encouragement. The purpose was actual combat, and he wanted something that could protect Hotaru and him with no problem at all.

Besides, even with his genius, he was still a young man who wanted something 'cool'.

That was something that the hatchling was. A dragon would not only be something a guy could easily associate with, and had the power and versatility to back it up. It would be able to not only fly and keep someone company, but it could fight right along side them.

Which would definately help Hotaru, who could use something that could chomp, stomp and much more to any yoma.

So he was pleased, and he went over to pet the newborn dragon, which luxuriated in the caress that went over a form that was psychically quite powerful even if it was still a hatchling and physically not all that impressive.

* * *

Hotaru's eyes nearly popped out of her head. "How cuuuuuuuuuuuute!"

The dragon seemed to return the sentiment, nuzzling its cheek against hers briefly.

Long, thin, sinuous, if stretched out - it would be about the length of her arm but less than half the width for most of that length. The exception was the main body, with the thin but servicable limbs and somewhat thicker chest area. The wings would occasionally fan out, but were small for now.

Hotaru blinked. "She says her name is Amethyst."

Ranma nodded. "A good name, matches her color."

Amethyst warbled, a musical sound that seemed to hang in the air briefly.

"She speaks in my mind?" asked Hotaru.

"Only for you," said Ranma, beaming like a proud pappa. Which he was, in a way. "She has some psychic abilities, a breath weapon, and can protect you when you need it. In return, she needs you to feed her. Cat or dog food, something with meat in it - she needs vitamins and protein."

Hotaru scratched her dragon under the chin as Amethyst settled into a loop around the young girl's shoulders.

"She's just hatched, so she needs to sleep and eat and exercise," said Ranma.

"I'll take her out to the park," said Hotaru, brightening. "She can get plenty of exercise there!"

"Go right ahead, but don't forget to send your friends by," said Ranma.

"Unnn," said Hotaru, nodding.

* * *

Hotaru couldn't run very far or very fast, so it didn't take long before she was sitting down and watching her new pet play.

*Love you.*

Hotaru flushed at that, not only the message but the surge of feelings accompanying it. She could feel it in those moments of connection. Unconditional pure affection. The darting winged shape swooped and turned and glided, here annoying a squirrel and then scattering pigeons.

*Hungry.*

A brief stop at a startled street vendor and then Hotaru was feeding Amethyst with little bits of stewed chicken from a bowl of rice.

Hotaru noticed that even Amethyst's tongue was purplish, and wondered why that particular color scheme.

Amethyst made a long contented trilling noise when they were done, though what she Sent was a mixture of contentment/full belly feel and more of that same love.

It was a heady thing for Hotaru, who had spent as much time being NOT loved as she had. The warm presence of Amethyst as she looped herself around Hotaru like some loose living scarf, accompanied by the mental feelings were nearly overwhelming. Until she'd met her sempai there were few that she could relate to - though now she had the other Senshi.

Hotaru thought a few warm thoughts about her sempai.

Amethyst took wing again after awhile, this time to chase a pigeon who had apparently decided to assault Hotaru in search of bread crumbs. It took Hotaru to do some convincing to keep Amethyst from adding pigeon to her diet.

What really surprised Hotaru at the end of it was that Amethyst abruptly vanished from midair, causing a brief moment of panic, then reappearing just over Hotaru in order to settle back to her accustomed perch.

"You can teleport?" asked Hotaru.

Closing one eye so that she could keep the other open for any other pests that might threaten her mistress, Amethyst 'sounded' puzzled. *Flew Between.*

"'Between'?" asked Hotaru.

*Sisters and I all can Send to our human, Send to each other, fly Space Between Space. Other talents have individual.*

"I see," said Hotaru, rubbing Amethyst's neck just behind the head, earning a sound of pleasure from her dragon.

Ever since Hotaru had started to discover the attraction of boys, Hotaru had wondered what it would be like to be seen as a girl that a boy would like. It wasn't that she felt that she was some ravishing beauty, as she would have been the first one to deny any possibility of her getting male attention of that sort. But she would have liked a crush, or even an awkward conversation, so that she could actually find out what it was like. That had been the desire of a lonely young girl, and once her sempai had come into the picture, she had discovered that she actually had feelings of love to take account of.

But she'd never desired to have _this_ sort of situation come up.

"Come on," snidely commented the boy in front of her. "We just want to spend some time with a pretty little girl like you."

"Yeah. Something so... innocent has to be fun when she learns to really party," agreed one of his friends.

The other one nodded. "You can entertain us for a _long_ time."

"Ummm... I don't think so..." she murmured, pulling in on herself as they started to surround her.

"Oh, come on. You're not going to let us feel a bit of your sweetness?"

"Huh? I don't know what you want from me..."

"Why don't we show you?" the first boy told her, and grabbed her arm.

That proved to be enough for Amethyst, as she uncurled from around her person's neck. One moment, she was laying there, and the next, she was biting the attacker's forearm. He cried out and let go, which was when the dragon clawed at the other two boys, leaving them clutching at stinging lines on their flesh. Whimpering in pain, they stumbled away, and ran to put some distance between her and them.

*Bah. Didn't finish.* Amethyst grumbled as she settled down.

"Oh?" Hotaru asked.

*They still move.*

Despite knowing that such a comment was not quite nice, the violet eyed girl felt it best to give her dragon a thankful stroke as she went to head home.

* * *

Pushing up the goggles on his face, Ranma considered what he was doing and smiled. Things were progressing quite well, and he was pleased with the results. Soon enough, his latest work would prove to be the help that he'd envisioned. As it was, Hotaru and Amethyst had appeared to be getting along right from the first moment that they'd met. That pleased him, and he was glad that she'd managed to be able to handle the situation with such confidence.

Though the fact that she, or rather both of them were growing up so well wasn't what was bringing a tear to his eye. It was just a lot of strain... or so he told himself.

* * *

Bringing home Amethyst was something that Hotaru had to admit that she was happy about. Not only was she bringing her new friend to live with her, she was also going to have another part of her new home to feel good about. In her old home, she'd been left with nothing more than a dark room and lots of stuffed animals and dolls for friends. It had been a lonely existence, and she had always been depressed when she was living like that.

She had a new life now though, and that included a new place to live. Sure, she had stuffed animals and dolls here too, but they were only one part of the bright and happy place that she stayed in. Now she had a place to stay where she was actually cared for, and felt like a part of it.

With the smile that thinking about her situation always put onto her face, she walked up to the front door of the place where she lived with her relatives.

* * *

Setsuna stared. The timeline had gone REALLY wrong.

Chibi-usa - nowhere in sight. Oh, she'd been caught sneaking out of the palace and had been grounded for the foreseeable future. Smoking?! Well, that explained that.

Hotaru had not been completely friendless as she'd found her sempai. Hotaru had been freed of the Mistress Nine seed before the Senshi had found out she was Sailor Saturn. When they HAD - Sailor Saturn had fought beside them despite Uranus and Neptune and HER OWN panicking at the Sailor of Destruction's appearance.

The fight at Mugen Gakuen had gone completely wrong.

The other Sailors KNEW that someone had assisted them on three seperate occasions. Once when Saturn had just shown up. The final time when SOMEONE had reinforced the forcefield they'd put up around the...

He did WHAT?!

Sailor Pluto twitched. Ranma Saotome didn't truck with the rules apparently and was treating magic as a science. He had already mastered some things that would have given the makers of the henshin pens inferiority complexes. He was as good at this stuff as the original Ranma had been at martial arts.

And Hotaru was NOT supposed to have distant relatives who had taken her in!

Especially THOSE relatives!

* * *

"Tadaima!" announced Hotaru.

"Oh, you're back, Hotaru? How was school?"

"Okay, I visited my sempai on the way home," said Hotaru. "Uhm. He gave me a present."

"Oh how nice," said Kasumi, entering the hallway, absently drying a dish. "What did he give you?"

"Breeeeeeeeeeeee," trilled Amethyst.

Akane stepped up, curious at what had made the odd noise.

"Breeeeeeeee?" asked Amethyst.

Kasumi and Akane stared at the purple winged lizard, as it stretched and fluttered its wings from its perch across Hotaru's shoulders.

There was a moment where two sisters stared and were stared at. Where Hotaru waited nervously to see what the reaction would be to her bringing home a pet.

* * *

Akane Tendo was a tomboy, much as she might not like to admit it. She was a natural fighter who had been trained in the martial arts school that her family followed. Her skills in traditional feminine tasks were not quite usable, and she had a quick temper. All in all, she was a tough girl who could manage to muscle through most problems.

"CUUUUUUUUTE!"

Of course, she was also a teenaged girl who had a natural propensity for caring for animal life.

"Oh, wow! I've never seen such a sweet little thing! Can I pet him?" Akane gushed with a broad smile on her face.

"Umm..." Hotaru murmured uncertainly. "'She'."

"Eh?"

"Amethyst is a 'she', not a boy."

"I see. Well then, that's good to hear. A girl certainly can't have a problem with being cute."

"Uh-huh," the violet eyed girl replied with a small smile of her own as the martial artist gingerly petted Amethyst, clearly taking care not out of fear, but out of a desire not to hurt the winged lizard.

"I can't believe that something so great is happening," Akane commented, turning to her sister. "What do you think, Kasumi?"

The elder Tendo had looked up from the basket that was lined with a soft towel for comfort, bowl piled high with food, and dish that held some water that she'd pulled out, and looked over at Akane with a slightly confused blink. "I'm so sorry. Were you saying something?"

"Nothing important."

"Okay... Then I'll just get back to making the preparations for Hotaru's darling little friend. It'll be so nice to have her here!"

"I can't help but agree, sis. Not that we have to guess _her_ thoughts on this, right?"

Hotaru started a bit at the comment, but slowly found herself pleased that she had been so easily included in such a gently teasing comment. When she'd first come to the dojo, she'd been worried about what sort of reception she'd get. But almost as soon as she'd come in, Kasumi had started to treat her like her own child. She would have started earlier, but she had to get to her first.

For her part, Akane had proven to be a rather... odd girl, and didn't even seem to notice it. She tried so hard to be like Kasumi, but was showing strength that had the younger girl nearly looking for the signs of a fuku. Such power was astonishing, and she was a pretty strong girl for someone without some sort of empowerment from outside. She'd even acted as Hotaru's protector, as she seemed to have this need to defend the younger girl from trouble. And she seemed to have the will and skill to take on most problems with ease.

That included Tatewaki Kuno, who had to be the oddest boy that she'd ever met, and she knew someone who threw armor piercing roses while wearing a tuxedo. He just seemed to be incapable of understanding some things, and he got the strangest ideas, such as starting morning fights to see who could date Akane. During what had to be the single most weird experience of her life, he'd nearly hit her when trying to challenge Akane. Needless to say, both girls had been displeased by that. The youngest Tendo had _really_ thrashed him on that instance, to the point that she had been _scary_. He'd managed to stay conscious somehow, and apologized for what he'd been about to do. So she'd accepted the apology, and given him a smile of understanding, since she'd felt bad for getting in the way.

Now he thought of her as the 'gentle angel with the heart of gold', who was to be protected and treated as one would 'china of the finest quality'. Basically, that worked out to where she was considered a sweet, willing to try, and shy little darling that he wanted to treat as a favored individual.

She wasn't quite sure if she would ever understand him, but whatever made it so that allowed her to unwittingly stop the morning attacks on Akane by being disappointed in being unable to stop them, and finding them distressing, she was all for it.

"She seems to be really happy to have Amethyst here," Hotaru commented softly.

"There is no way that we could have a problem with a little girl like this," Akane answered. "Though..."

"What?"

"You said that your sempai had given you her, right?"

"Yes, he did..."

"Then... How did he get her in the first place?"

"Ummmm... I don't know," the younger girl admitted in complete honesty, as she didn't know all the details of just how he'd created her new friend.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Aww..."

"What is it?"

"I want one!" Akane grumbled, looking disgruntled over not having a way to get one on her own.

"You do?"

"Sure! I mean, she's so _cute_."

"The only one who knows how to get you one is my sempai."

"You mean that I'd have to ask him for one?" the younger of the sisters asked.

"Something like that."

"But to bother the one boy who can treat a girl with some respect... I don't want to cause trouble for you..."

"Would that make you not want to have one." "There's no way that I could not want one. Think of having two of them here. They could have fun playing with each other, and we could have them with us..."

The Senshi of Saturn watched as the older girl started daydreaming, giggling slightly at the happy expression that she was seeing. It was obvious that neither sister was going to complain about her bringing home a pet, and she felt more at home there. She'd already felt comfortable enough, but this just made it just that much more solid that she had a real place among these distant relatives.

Smiling at all the good feelings that brought up, Hotaru let Amethyst move over to where she could get fed by a happy Kasumi.

* * *

"Breeee," said Amethyst, her vocal chords and mouth being unsuited for speaking Japanese.

"So, can your dragon do tricks?" asked Akane.

"Well, sempai said she could do a few things," replied Hotaru. "I've seen her teleport and she can speak to my mind directly."

"Tadaima," said Nabiki, entering the house.

"Welcome home," called out Kasumi, who was with everyone else in watching the dragon in their backyard.

"Sempai said she had some 'psychic abilities' and a 'breath weapon'," said Hotaru.

"Where is everyone?" asked Nabiki from inside the house.

"What's a breath weapon?" asked Akane.

"I'm not sure," admitted Hotaru.

"Whatever, sure is cute though," said Akane as Amethyst explored her domain.

"What's going on?" asked Nabiki as the winged lizard made a circular disc of midair, went through, then flew out a similar disc near Hotaru. When the creature landed on Hotaru's outstretched arm and quickly made its way to hang like some living sash off of her, Nabiki didn't notice the rice cracker slipping from her hand to land on the deck.

"Hotaru's sempai gave her a present," said Kasumi. "Isn't that nice?"

Nabiki eyed the dragon for a moment, then her sisters, then back to the dragon. "Uh-huh."

"Urrrrrrrr?" asked Amethyst, thinking this new human looked kind of shifty.

"Oh, she's not that bad," assurred Hotaru.

"Ruuuu," said a skeptical Amethyst.

"Wow, she almost sounds like she's talking," said Akane.

Nabiki, for her part, made a quick decision as to dealing with this latest weirdness.

"Let me get this straight. Your sempai gave you that?" Nabiki asked, raising her brows at the youngest girl in the room.

Hotaru nodded back at her. "He gave her to me today, and we're already getting along really well."

"I can see that."

"It's that obvious?"

"You'd have to be blind to not notice it," the middle Tendo daughter replied with a shake of her head.

"What is it?" Akane asked with a scowl. "Do you have a problem with him giving her a nice gift?"

"Not really. I'm sure that he's seeing her as someone special."

"Then what's your problem?"

"Other than the fact that I'm not exactly comfortable with things flying around my head? Nothing much."

"But she's so cute," Kasumi murmured with her brows drawing together in confusion.

"That is part of the problem."

Wearing a disappointed expression on her face, Hotaru stroked Amethyst reassuringly. "Don't you like her?"

"Oh, I'm sure that I'll just adore her... eventually. But, kid? I'm not the 'cutesy' sort of girl, remember? I don't do bows in my hair and ruffles on my dressed. And I don't do pets that make me want to check for cavities."

"Oh..."

"But you have fun. Me? I'm going to go read my manga."

"Hope that's fun..."

"For me? It will be," Nabiki told her, and strolled out of the room with a negligent wave. She let herself relax as she left the room, as she knew that they didn't have anything to worry about. What she'd told them had been the unadulterated truth, as she really wasn't that much into warm and fuzzy moments, and despite the scales on the pet, it looked like a cute and fuzzy moment back there. Those sorts of times made for great shows of affection and similar emotions, and she'd never been the sort of 'touchie feelie' kind of girl.

Of course, Hotaru was the sort of girl that particular type of situation was made for. Not that she had any problem with having the girl stay with them. In fact, she regarded Hotaru like a little sister that she was rather fond of. The kid was nice enough, and did tend to try hard. But she was also innocent, not in the lack of trouble she'd been in, but in the simple and pure way that she looked at the world. Seeing that the squirt was like that made her feel rather... protective of Hotaru, just like with Kasumi.

Those in the family room were innocents anyway, and so she thought that they should be left in their lives of dreams. Things might get bothersome for them, but at least they still had their simple outlook on things.

As far her, she knew what was what, and she was perfectly able to take care of herself. She was smart, pretty, intelligent, and able to take advantage of all three. If she saw an opportunity to get a bit of something, then she would go for it... unless it had to do with that 'sempai' of Hotaru's. Anyone who could find flying lizards for young girls was not someone that she wanted to tangle with. Besides, she didn't feel right about the risk of hurting Hotaru.

Sighing heavily to herself, she had to admit that she did have her own soft side, though she found that she was fairly annoyed by it as she headed to her room.

* * *

The incubator was large and warm and filled with leathery eggs.

The process had used a number of things and was the end result of a large number of variables that had been worked out in experiments. When he'd come to this result, he'd been satisfied.

Ranma looked over the eggs and tried to imagine what they'd be in a few centuries. Right now they were small hatchlings. According to his figures, that'd last for about fifty years. They'd be bigger at the end of that time, maybe between the size of a big dog for the smallest while the biggest would be about pony-sized. By the time they passed the century mark, they'd be big enough to be taking their partner for flights. By the time they passed the fifth century mark, they'd be adults. Fully grown and powerful.

Just the thing for what was needed of them.

He'd bugged Hotaru, then several of the sites she and her new friends had gathered at. He had done so out of concern, out of a desire to help his only friend in the world, and out of curiosity. Unless he had more information about what was going on, he was in the dark and couldn't do a thing. Being helpless was something he could NOT stand, despite that he was confined to a wheelchair and not much use in a fight.

He'd even figured out the mana connection of the Senshi and utilized that in these dragons - to further the connection between Senshi and pet as well as provide a power source. Hotaru's dragon was connected to her on a spiritual level as well as an emotional one.

He'd done the same for each of the Senshi that he knew about.

Resting a hand on the warm surface of the red egg, Ranma wondered if Hotaru would remember him centuries from now when he was dust and her pet was still vital and strong. No, probably not. He could see the revulsion in the eyes of others at his twisted and crippled form, though Hotaru didn't have that - she was entirely too nice for such things.

He just hoped that eventually she could find someone who appreciated her.

* * *

Soun stared. "A dragon?"

"Urrrrrrr?" asked Amethyst.

Soun blinked a couple more times at the unexpected sight then turned back to where everyone had gathered around the dinner table. "Your friend gave you a dragon?"

"Yes, her name is Amethyst," said Hotaru.

Soun nodded. "Okay. I don't believe I've ever met this friend of yours."

"Well, he's..." began Hotaru, her voice trailing off as she tried to come up with the words.

Nabiki came to the rescue. "His name's Saotome. Real hotshot exam ace. Comes in third or fourth on that sort of thing in the citywide tests - and that's because they say he doesn't really apply himself to that. Has a sort of 'mad scientist' reputation. Lost use of his legs and got himself banged up really bad in some childhood accident."

"Saotome you say?" asked Soun. "I used to know a 'Saotome' but his child died years ago."

"You know a lot about him," said Hotaru.

"I investigated him a bit when you started hanging out around him," said Nabiki with a shrug. "He's got a bit of a reputation as someone who spends a lot of time being angry or something."

"No, he just doesn't do well with people," said Hotaru.

Nabiki shrugged again, picking at her rice.

"Well, if he can't walk then he isn't very dangerous," reasoned Soun.

"Daddy," said Nabiki, as Kasumi and Hotaru gasped. "That isn't very polite."

"I have to consider the safety of my little girls," said Soun, drawing up some dignity for the occasion.

"I've called some of my other friends and we're going over there tomorrow after school," said Hotaru after some uncomfortable silence.

Akane chewed her lip briefly, wondering if she could go with Hotaru. Maybe she could get a dragon too.

* * *

Ranma knew that working in only one direction could be a major problem. No matter how many times one tried to hammer away on one path, there were plenty of times when doing so was just a stupid manuever. If someone were to keep on doing that, all they'd get would be a headache, and even if that one idea worked, never looking onto other paths would make one miss the possible benefits that trying a whole new method would allow them to do things.

And as he put the last little 'zap' onto his latest project, he knew that it would be proof of exactly what he was thinking of.

He picked gingerly picked it up, not because it would break, but because he was very interested in what he had made. The orb didn't look like much, but such appearances could be deceiving. Trying it at a test item, he saw the glow of it working, and then found that it had done what he had wanted it to do.

His techno-magical containment orb actually worked, which pleased him. Now, not only would Hotaru and her friends have dragons to help them fight enemies, but they would have this to assist them. If they wanted to keep from hurting a possessed person, take down an enemy without destroying it, or simply contain something that they might have had serious trouble with, they would be able to do exactly that.

It was a great work, and he knew that it would seriously help out with what they had to do. Instead of having only one way to deal with a menace, they would have other options available to them. Being a help in that way was pleasing, but he was more concerned with making it so that Hotaru had less to worry about, and possibly be harmed by.

Of course, he could use it as well, but he wasn't quite certain why he would have to do so. Still, he had to admit as he wiped the back of his work glove covered hand across his forehead, it was a possibility that he might have to look into. One could never be certain about what could happen, and he didn't want to have one of the Senshi's enemies trying to target him to get at them.

* * *

"Oh, how _cuuuute_!" Usagi Tsukino might have been a reincarnated princess, a current heroine charged with the protection of the Earth, and the future monarch of Crystal Tokyo, but she was still a teenaged schoolgirl.

Minako nodded several times as she ran her fingers down the spine of the dragon laying on Hotaru's shoulders. "It looks like a little darling!"

"What does it eat?" Makoto asked, rubbing the dragon hatchling under the chin.

"'She'," Hotaru automatically corrected with a blush.

"Oh?"

"Amethyst is a girl."

"Ahh... Sorry about that."

"It's okay," the younger girl replied, feeling a little self conscious. But she was also very happy, as her friends had seemed to be instantly taken with her new pet as soon as she'd walked up to them. "But why do you want to know about what she eats?"

"I make things for everyone else. Why shouldn't I make one for her?"

"Ohhhh..."

"Did you go to class with her?" Ami asked, scanning a curious Amethyst with the Mercury computer.

"No, not really. She was always nearby, but I didn't want to risk her being bothered by someone who wouldn't like her."

"Or people who thought that she was really wonderful."

"Huh?"

"Think of what people would do if they found out that such a being existed."

For a moment Hotaru's mind drew a blank, but then the image of Amethyst strapped to a table as some crazy scientist bent towards her with a scalpel popped up and made her shiver.

Rei's brows came together as she frowned. "Where did you get her anyway?"

"From my sempai."

Usagi frowned at the shrine priestess. "You can't be thinking that this is a bad thing, can you?"

"Of course not," Rei answered with a snort. "But Hotaru's pet is pretty amazing, and isn't something that you see every day. So, I was just curious about where it had come from."

"I see..."

"I'm not sure that we'll be able to just go and get ones for ourselves though."

Makoto seemed to deflate a bit at that. "That's true. It's too bad. I was thinking about how nice it would be to have a little guy like this."

"But you can," Hotaru informed them. "And you will!"

"Oh?"

"It's why I'm bringing you over to see my sempai. He's got dragons for you guys too!"

"Really?"

"Uh-huh!"

"This is so great!" Minako chirped.

Ami looked thoughtful. "It could prove to be rather intriguing..."

The violet eyed girl nodded and smiled at her friends' shared enthusiasm, as she had hoped that they would be pleased. She'd been afraid that they might take it badly, but now she didn't have to worry. And she could enjoy the chance to visit her sempai with them.

* * *

Sailor Pluto was still trying to figure out what the boy had done, and was getting more alarmed the more she researched.

The dragon had a direct link to Sailor Saturn, and was using a related mana stream. So Saturn had Silence Wall and Silence Glaive Surprise and her ultimate attack, whereas Amethyst merely had claws and teeth and a breath weapon that was a coherent particle emission capable of putting little holes in just about any substance known to man.

Not only that but as Saturn grew in power, so would Amethyst. Somehow that boy had not only figured out that her health was poor because of the very power she was channeling, but the little dragon would act as a regulator for that power to minimize those problems.

The boy was more dangerous than ever! When he'd been merely a martial artist he'd been a threat but... no. That was it.

Sailor Pluto, guardian of the Gates, oldest of Senshi, said a particularly unpleasant word that didn't translate too well from Ancient Millenial.

Ranma Saotome had done what he had always done. He had been hit with an overwhelming offense, so he found a way around the obstacle in order to pull a triumph off. In this case, he'd been blocked from the martial arts and so had applied it to every problem he'd encountered along the way.

"How many times do I have to kill you, Ranma Saotome?" Pluto asked the images.

This time, it appeared, she had better make sure of that.

* * *

Akane had known about the Hino shrine for some time. Hotaru had left the number behind for a few study sessions. The three Tendo sisters had been delighted that Hotaru was making so many friends of late.

So she was ready to follow them when they left - all going to see Hotaru's OTHER friend. The one who had dragons.

It wasn't as if she NEEDED one. No, hardly that. They were cute and tough and potentially very useful. A dragon could keep up with her. A dragon could be taught to fight with her. A dragon would be... cool.

She was just hoping that well maybe, you know, if he had an extra one...

* * *

Ranma toggled his wheelchair to go near the incubator again and check. He hoped that Hotaru kept her appointment. Several of the eggs were ready to go.

It really would be best if the Senshi they were linked to were present at the hatching. Well, he could delay that hatching a couple of hours at most.

* * *

Even though he could delay things for as long as it took Hotaru's friends to get there, Ranma didn't want to have to resort to that, as it would be pushing things. He wanted it to be as natural as possible, given that such a beginning would certainly be a welcome path for a relationship between girl and dragon. Then they would be able to grow together, sharing each experience as it went along. But there was only one way that could be accomplished.

"Sempai!" called out a familiar and welcome voice.

"Hotaru," he replied, rolling his wheelchair around to face the new arrivals. "You've brought your friends."

"I hope that this isn't an imposition..." Ami trailed off apologetically.

"Why would it be?"

"We all came..."

"When I asked for you to come. Though, if I remember correctly, I only asked Hotaru to send you along..."

Minako frowned slightly. "You didn't want her to come?"

"No, no... I just thought that she'd have other things to do."

"But I wanted to come see you again, sempai!" Hotaru put in earnestly.

"You wanted to see a wreck like me, did you?"

"Don't call yourself a 'wreck', please? I don't like it when you do..."

"I was just teasing. Anyway, I do have reasons other than just passing the time for this visit."

"You're giving us our own dragons," Rei commented.

One of his brows went up. "And you know this..."

"From Hotaru. She told us when we said how we liked hers."

"Ah. Yes. Then things have gone well between the two of them?"

"You should see them!" Usagi chirped. "They're always together! It's _so_ CUTE!"

"I was hoping for that. And it's good that you have come now."

"Oh? Why?"

"Some of the dragons are ready to hatch, and I don't want to force them to wait longer than I'd have to."

"They're going to be born?" the reincarnated princess whispered, with gasps coming from the other girls, including the martial artist one who was hiding behind some equipment.

"You could definitely say that."

"Oh, wow..."

"Something the matter?"

"Nothing bad..."

"But?"

"This is the start of their lives. I don't think that there's ever a more special time than when a baby's born, no matter what it is."

"You, I like," he murmured almost dismissively.

"Really?"

"Sure. You're all heart. However, we can analyze personalities later. Right now, there are things to be done," Ranma said.

* * *

"-so you see the situation," said Sailor Pluto.

"Sneaky and subtle menaces? How dastardly," agreed Uranus.

"I've been getting conflicting feelings regarding this," said Neptune. "So he's managed to alter the future and as a result a new menace is looming."

"That's exactly right," said Sailor Pluto.

"We eliminate the source, we eliminate the problem, no more menace to the world," summed up Uranus. She nodded. "Quick and clean."

"Which beggars the question, why now?" asked Neptune thoughtfully.

"What do you mean 'why now'?" asked Pluto.

"You come from the future, or I should say, a future," pointed out Neptune. "You nonetheless are frequently surprised by some things, and other events you could have had us all avoid - you let us walk into it. I understand paradox and fate and karma - why violate those things now?"

"Because this particular problem is... my fault," admitted Pluto, hanging her head. "It is my shame. My sin. In attempting to avoid one problem, I caused another."

"And since you messed up the first time, you want help this time," guessed Uranus.

"That is so," admitted Pluto.

"Very well then," said Sailor Uranus. "Point out this 'Ranma Saotome' and we'll deal with him."

"Together," said Neptune, nodding her agreement. While aspects of this all felt 'off' - the regret and shame from Pluto seemed real enough.

* * *

"Which means that you can come out now, Miss Tendo," said Ranma.

Akane slowly came out from behind the partition, wondering how he'd spotted her.

Ranma looked around, and wasn't put off by the number of gazes slipping away from him. The suppressed revulsion, the averted looks. No, what surprised him were the number of those who WOULD meet his gaze. He knew he was a mess, and that Japanese tended to avoid anything they saw as 'unclean' - such as a crippled and scarred ugly fellow in a wheelchair. It was a pleasant surprise, but then to be friends of Hotaru - wouldn't it follow that they were special themselves?

"If you'll direct your attention to the incubator," said Ranma, clicking the toggle that retracted the dome. When it stalled halfway through he rapped the side to free it up again and it finished retracting.

"Why are those shaking like that?" asked Usagi.

"They're reacting to your presence, and those who would select you to be their partner are anxious to meet you," said Ranma. "Keep in mind that this isn't a hamster that you could pawn off on someone else later. If you accept the dragon, she has a lifespan potentially lasting centuries."

"So, uhm," said Akane in the background, bringing everyone's attention back to her.

"I calculated a 13% chance that you or one of your sisters would attend, Miss Tendo," said Ranma, his voice cooling ever so slightly as he noted that she was like Miss Aino and Miss Kino in not wanting to look in his direction. Well, maybe in time they could get past all that cultural conditioning. He'd be civil though - this was an important moment.

_crick-crak_

Several girls stared wide-eyed as the first of the quivering eggs began to crack.

"I- I hear singing," said Ami, tears beginning to well up in her eyes.

"I don't hear anything," said Usagi, glancing at her friend.

"His name is Cinnabar," said Ami as one egg began to crack. "I feel..."

Ranma moved his wheelchair back out of the way, not saying a thing as the dragon struggled to get to his princess.

Hotaru hugged her friend as she trembled and stared at the dragon breaking free from his confinement.

"What do you feel?" asked Rei, staring back and forth between friend and the dragon as it finally slipped completely out. "I -".

Rei had just gone stiff, staring off into space. "Oh."

"Sempai?" asked Hotaru.

"In the fridge, there's some bowls of shredded meat," said Ranma.

* * *

Akane watched as one after the other of the girls was united with one after the other of the dragons. Surprisingly, each had a different coloration and pattern. Hotaru's was all in shades of purple, while the bookish-looking girl had a dragon whose skin seemed to be brightly chromed metal.

The shrine priestess got one that was entirely in shades of red, and the tall girl got one that had patterns of brown and dark green.

She didn't dare hope that she'd get one. After all, she hadn't even been invited, and-

*Don't feel sad.*

Akane frowned at the unfamiliar voice, looking around.

*Here.*

She didn't dare hope. Right?

*Love you!*

Akane staggered back, feeling tears well up in her own eyes. That projection, going straight from mind-to-mind with no hint of barriers. Complete sincerity. Complete love, beyond what a normal human heart would be capable of.

Now she understood why each of the girls had broken out in tears the moment their dragon had started breaking free.

*She who is Other rejects me,* sent that non-voice, sounding incredibly sad. *Accept me?*

"yes," whispered Akane as her eyes went to one of the quivering eggs in the back.

The shell broke as a head popped up. A green so dark that it was almost black, with golden eyes swirling in its head. *Accept you! Love you!*

Akane wasn't aware of how close her reaction had been to each of the others, the frantic pushing forward, to meet her dragon as it finished clawing its way free from the shell.

"Chrono!" said Akane, cradling the dragon to her and feeling the river of emotion washing through her. "His name is Chrono."

* * *

Ranma was surprised a second time. From the rumors and his background check, he'd have thought Akane Tendo was a brutal thug of a woman. It appeared that she had depths that were not quite so brutal, despite being a martial artist. A dragon should be able to see directly into the soul, and apparently the Pluto dragon had seen something worthy there. How very interesting.

Perhaps not all martial artists were as bad as his parents.

Perhaps.

* * *

Even if the girls didn't accept him, Ranma didn't mind, as he wasn't out looking for a girlfriend from among them. So, when they immediately began to ignore him as soon as they their attentions were taken away, it wasn't such a problem. They were there to connect with the dragons, not him, which was exactly what was going on.

But he did have to admit that he didn't feel all that comfortable standing there. That wasn't because he had a bunch of pretty girls in his lab, but was due to all the warm and fuzzy vibes that were filling the place. He was happy for them, and he couldn't wait around watching them. After all, even self-styled mad scientist geniuses had to keep busy. Besides... he hadn't exactly had a lot of that going on in his own life, and he wasn't that comfortable watching others get to enjoy that sort of thing. In fact, it made him feel like he was intruding.

At the sight of a golden dragon do what looked like a giggling twirl around Miss Aino while a white and pink one cocked her head regally before pressing her cheek to Miss Tsukino's, he decided that he needed to get back to work. One containment orb wouldn't be enough, and he wanted to get his presence out of disrupting what was a loving and kind moment.

He did feel proud though, even if he told himself that the watery eyes and sniffling was just dust.

* * *

A direct assault seemed to be the easiest direction to take, but Neptune knew that such an activity might not be for the best. It might bring in the element of surprise, but even if they managed to get him on the first try, they might be screwed over. He could be the most dark and dangerous force around, but if he had helpers, or some sort of volatile device that couldn't be jolted, a frontal assault could very likely cause more harm than good.

So, the best choice was to simply slip in, and start doing some recon. Both Uranus and she knew that this wasn't merely something that they could do on a moment's notice. From what Pluto had told them, this boy hadn't intended to do something wrong, and so didn't deserve to be blasted like some monster. If they had to do it, they could at least make it quick, and easy.

Not that they hadn't felt some sort of problem with the whole idea. She wasn't too keen on the concept as a whole, and she knew that Uranus was having some reservations on just how truthful Pluto was being. It made for another reason that they didn't want to rush in, and nothing that the elder Senshi could do would make them hurry.

However, a gasp from her partner could jolt her, and she immediately turned her attention from where she was sneaking to look at the blonde. What she saw didn't seem to be bad though, as she could see Uranus smirking down at a small lizard like creature that was looking up at her in a way that almost seemed like it was trying to be naughtily cute. Instead of blasting it though, the racer gave it a mock-admonishing tap, and grinned in what looked like a shared moment of amusement.

Any attempt to figure out what that could mean would have to wait, as she heard music. It wasn't like someone had turned on a tape, but was more like there was someone playing an instrument with the sort of talent that people wanted to hear. She could feel the rhythm of it, and knew that if she could just reach for it, she could add to it, make it greater than the two of them were apart. This was the sort of music that would wind about the spirit and leave one guessing as to who was playing what as it brought up images of the sea and oceans.

*You want to share the Song?*

Sailor Neptune nodded absently, looking for the source of the voice that she was hearing.

*Don't cry. It is here for you.*

The violinist hadn't even realized that there were tears sliding down her cheeks, but she knew that they weren't sad ones.

*Love you too!*

She heard the sound of an egg hatching, and found that she could only feel anticipation of what was to come.

A sinuous creature similar to the one that she had seen with Uranus slid around what she'd been hiding behind, but it was colored all in shades of the sea. *Accept me?*

The only thing that Neptune could think to do was to give a firm nod and hold out her arm, as her throat had closed up to much to let her speak.

*Accept you! Love you!*

"Arethusa," Neptune whispered as she tenderly reached out and stroked that long body with her free hand.

* * *

Sailor Neptune and Sailor Uranus were a close couple. They loved each other.

The love that each dragon had for his/her partner was a different sort of love, one that had no sexual component or condition or barrier. The outpouring of emotion was a rushing stream that swept through those partners.

The relationship was something of pet to owner, something of partners seeking to aid the other in life's little battles and the Senshi's bigger battles, something of a child to a parent.

Each dragon exploited an unused frequency within their Senshi's mana stream, part of the energies of their Senshi which flowed from a particular concept/planet.

The dragon of Mercury, Ami's Cinnabar, was a silvery metal-scaled dragon whose breath would send out little puffs of vapor from time to time.

Rei's Inferno was a brilliant red and scaled and tough-looking, a real fighter despite his current small size and thin build.

Hotaru's Amethyst was a lavender dragonet whose breath weapon was a coherent particle emission.

Akane's Chrono was black with green highlights, golden eyed and draped across his human's shoulders. He seemed to sense some need within his companion and was simply offering what comfort he could.

Makoto's Leaf was a dragonet of green and brown, whose yellow-white eyes seemed almost to glow from within.

Minako's Khrisos was entirely shades of gold, with eyes of brilliant blue.

Usagi's Selene was shades of white and pink, with eyes that were completely white themselves.

Arethusa, Michiru's dragonet, was blue and green and the shades in between.

The red-gold of Haruka's dragon looked more dignified than the somewhat mischievous air that the dragon maintained.

Each had the common abilities of these dragons. Telepathic bond with their partner, ability to open teleportational portals, their natural claws and teeth, flight, a certain degree of toughness. Each had a 'breath weapon' - a magical discharge that they could spew from their mouths.

Each had a singular ability of their own, which they would grow into - another side effect of the magic flowing through them.

Each also had something in common with the newly hatched of any such species - a healthy appetite and tendency to sleep for long periods.

Sailor Neptune reached up and stroked the head of her dragon and frowned. "This - is not what I expected."

"No, it isn't," agreed Uranus. "I saw memories of the apartment when I linked. Saotome doesn't have use of his legs."

"So we were sent to kill someone stuck in a wheelchair?" asked Neptune.

Uranus nodded.

Neptune considered that. "She attempted to fix the problem once herself, and failed, do you suppose?"

"She's why he's stuck that way, yeah." Uranus sighed. "So we have to shoot a fish in a barrel."

"Hardly seems fair, or sporting, and if he's a menace - then HOW is a mystery," said Neptune. "Pluto may be right, and that if he is removed - the menace facing us in the future will fade. The Inners have left, to exercise their dragons and feed them. He's alone, we could strike now."

Uranus frowned and decided.

* * *

Up until that point, Pluto had never steered them wrong, and Uranus knew it. If there had been anyone who could get the information that would be needed to know that was going to be needed, it was her. With their past history, she had plenty of reasons for her to trust the older Senshi's judgement. That much was clear, and she was certain that she could handle that much.

Yet, she couldn't get rid of this awful feeling in the pit of her stomach that doing what Pluto had told them to do was wrong. It was something that simply took hold of her nerves, and made her realize that doing this might just be something that they shouldn't try.

And then she saw it.

"No... Let's not," Uranus told her partner. "I don't want to go with Pluto's plan."

"Oh?" Neptune said simply.

"Yeah. To be honest, this whole idea of hers stinks worse than the laundry for the track team after a practice session."

"That is a... fragrant way of putting it, though I would have to agree with your line of thinking."

"Really?"

The violinist nodded. "But of course. I mean, if we began to remove every _possible_ threat, we could be at it for eternity."

"Exactly. I mean, sure we've let monsters come out and attack, but that's different than attacking people ourselves. Then we were letting people be bait, and now we're..."

"Playing 'judge, jury, and executioner' for something that wouldn't be his fault."

"Pretty much," the blonde muttered.

"You also forgot one thing."

"What's that?"

"He created our new little friends, if what I think is true. Why would it be necessary to just kill him? We could use such help, especially since he's already supposedly changed the timeline."

"You're right about that."

"Then what do you want to do?" Neptune asked.

"When I first realized our problem, I figured that we would need to check him out. You know, let him go to sleep and sneak in to search around."

"And now?"

Uranus scowled and tugged on her gloves so that they were firmly on her hands. "I just saw something that needs our attention."

"Is that so?"

"It is."

Following her partner's gaze, Neptune saw a mysterious shadow that seemed to be moving along the ground without a visible source. As she didn't need to know much about physics to know that such a thing wasn't natural, she realized that there was a problem looming. Nodding to Uranus, she joined her in slipping off to track this oddity, with the both of them carrying their dragons.

* * *

Ranma looked over the notes.

Each of the dragons used unexploited mana frequencies within the stream of their related Senshi. Hotaru's Amethyst for example - as the dragon of the Senshi of destruction and creation, her breath was a discharge of the sort of thing one encountered when stars underwent their cycles of death and rebirth.

An alarm started flickering, and Ranma's calm was punctured. THOSE had been released? He'd run across this in his initial research, but it had turned out to have no potential benefit so he'd gone on to other sources of information.

Who could have disturbed the seals?

* * *

Two hours, thirty-seven minutes ago:  
There was a menace that was going to face the Senshi that had not been in the original timeline.

When it had become obvious that eliminating Ranma was going to be problematic, Sailor Pluto had tried to figure out what this other menace was.

It was not a martial arts menace. Ranma's past had been entirely cut away from him, and he did not associate with martial artists. Ranma was currently some sort of scientist, albeit one pursuing sciences not normally associated with the typical white-labcoat crowd.

So, believing that Ranma was going to meddle in Things Best Left Alone, Sailor Pluto went looking for it. She would bring PROOF that Ranma was going to destroy the world, end the bright future of Crystal Tokyo, mess up the TV Schedule, and cause the Tokyo Giants to lose every home game this season!

This looked likely. He was experimenting with magical frequencies, and she could find a spike right here. Eventually he'd investigate and set something loose.

Sailor Pluto turned the view of the Gates closer.

_CRASH_

"dead scream," tried Sailor Pluto as something like a flood of shadow started coming through the Gates.

She hadn't done this, some wandering martial artist had loosened the seal and fitted it together haphazardly. Eventually it would have broken on its own, and the reason that the wanderer had been there in the first place was the absence of Ranma in what would have been his usual place in the timeline.

Sailor Pluto didn't know this, at least not yet, so there was only one conclusion she could come to.

She was in DEEP trouble.


End file.
